Summary: A few years after Deanâs feral rut claimed her, their family is growing, and Y/N is content with having all she needs.
Pairing: Alpha!Dean Winchester x Female Omega!Reader
Rating: Teen
Bingo Square: Pack Dynamics for @jacklesversebingo
Triggers / Warnings / Tags: Omegaverse, A/B/O, A/B/O dynamics, alpha, omega, pack dynamics, pups, mentions of feral rut, mentions of heat, mentions of mating, mentions of knotting (all non-descriptive), pregnancy, nesting, daddy Dean, light smut, light references to labour and giving birth (all non-descriptive)
Word Count: 3.1k
A/N: I enjoyed writing this sequel to All She Wants so much, and I hope you enjoy it too! All feedback is welcome, so please consider reblogging to spread this far and wide around this Hellsite or leaving a comment. It really does fuel a creativeâs muse đ
A/N2: Woohoo! This is my first fill for Jacklesverse24 bingo, and the first thing I've posted in a LONG time!
My Masterlist AO3 Ko-Fi
Your POV
The pitter-patter of small feet rings through the air, occasionally followed by shrieks and laughter as Dean chases the twins along the winding hallways of the bunker. Itâs pure heaven, and thereâs no sound in the world you love more than the ones you hear outside your bedroom door at that moment.
They hadnât been planned, and neither you nor Dean had expected it, but you hadnât exactly been surprised by your pregnancy either. Youâd stopped taking birth control when you went on heat suppressants, but Deanâs feral rut had triggered an exceptional heat, and with all the mating and knotting that came after it, you knew the odds were against you coming out of that cabin without a pup.
The bigger surprise for you both was that you were expecting twins. Once the shock had worn off, you teased each other mercilessly about whether your ovaries were overzealous and had released two eggs or Deanâs sperm was so powerful it had split one. As it turned outâmuch to Deanâs absolute delightâit was the latter, and you gave birth to two healthy and happy identical boys who looked exactly like their father.
They were fiercely independent for four-year-olds, and had their own individual personalities since the day they came into the world; Bobby was brave and strong with a big heart, just like his father, and Charlie was smart, curious and determined like you. They were far too young for anyone to know if theyâd both be alphas like their father and uncle, but they were already showing strong alpha tendencies, which Dean was immensely proud of.
You made another trip from the closet to the bed, carrying more of Deanâs clothes for your nest. You were anxious and could feel that it was almost time. With Jody, Donna, and Cass on standby, and everything ready and prepared, you were impatiently waiting for the birth of your and Deanâs baby girl.
Crawling into the nest and surrounding yourself with your Alphaâs scent, you take a deep breath and try to relax. Dean can tell your blood pressure is high, saying your heartbeat hasnât been the same these past few weeks, and baby girlâs is a little faster, too. Heâd confined you to your shared bedroom to put your feet up and to try and keep your blood pressure down.
Being waited on hand and foot had been nice at first, but now youâre fed up and extremely agitated all the time. You know youâre no fun to be around right now, but being unable to perform your duties as an Omega and take care of your pups, your Alpha, andâas the matriarch of your packâeveryone else, is beginning to take its toll on you.
To add to your distress, youâre upset to be missing so much time with your boys, and Dean has had to calm you down about that at least once a day. In the end, he agreed to go to their bedroom each day and get some of their clothing for you to add to your nest so you had their scents constantly around you. It helped, but the pit in your stomach never really went away.
The boys came to see you all the time, though, telling you all about their adventures with Daddy and Uncle Sam. You particularly enjoyed their stories of how they constantly wound up poor, unsuspecting Uncle Cass. Those were your favourite moments of the day. That, and when Dean came to bed. Itâs only then you truly feel content, loved and safe in your Alphaâs arms.
As you settle back into your nest, the twins come crashing through your bedroom door, and you grin happily.
âMommy! Mommy! Help! Daddyâs trying to steal the treasure!â Charlie shouts, even though heâs only a foot away from you and thereâs no need for his raised voice.
âQuick, hide!â you say dramatically, throwing the bedcovers down and encouraging them to crawl in next to you.
Bobby and Charlie pull the covers over themselves and cuddle into your side. Each boy wraps an arm around your expansive stomach, and you sigh contentedly.
âMaâam, I am sorry to disturb you, but you wouldnât happen to have seen two little scamps running through here, now, would you?â Dean drawls from the doorway. He winks at you, and you grin back.
âWhy no, sir, I have not,â you respond, placing each hand on top of the lumps next to you.
âIâm truly sorry for disturbing you, Maâam. If you do see them, Iâll be down in the kitchen having me some pie,â he responds, a silent question hanging between you. âAre you okay? You got them?â You nod, grinning when he winks again and closes the bedroom door.
âDaddyâs gone, boys. You can come out now,â you say, smiling at the feeling of four small hands rubbing your swollen stomach.
âWe want to cuddle with you and our sister,â Charlie responds, and you chuckle.
âWeâd both like that very much,â you smile at the timely kick to one of your kidneys, and hug your boys tighter to your sides, sighing happily.
Deanâs POV
The serenity Dean felt from his Omega at having her pups in her arms kept him content enough to help Sam do some research for a few hours. There had been whispers and rumblings across the hunting community of what was probably the biggest and wickedest coven of witches anyone had ever known.
The ancient coven of Vindicta Pro Prima had roots going all the way back to the 1692 Salem Witch Trials, and was likely hundreds strong across continental America. The Winchesters werenât stupid enough to think theyâd be able to take them all down, but the more information they could gather, the better chance they had at protecting themselves and keeping up with whatever master plan Castiel and Rowena said they were cooking up.
Exhausted from worry for his Omega and unborn pup, and from taking care of his pack while she cared for herself and the life she was growing, Dean eventually relented at Samâs insistence that he go to bed.
âIâve got this, Dean. Go and rest with your family,â Sam smiled, still not quite believing the change in his big brother over the past few years from a stubborn alpha with commitment issues to a doting husband and father, and a fierce pack leader.
âThanks, Sammy. Donât stay up too late, alright? We can pick this up again tomorrow,â Dean said, standing from the table and stretching his back and shoulders out after sitting hunched over a laptop for hours.
âGoodnight, Dean.â Sam hadnât agreed with him, Dean noticed and knew his brother wouldn't come back out easily once heâd gone down a research rabbit hole.
âNight, Sammy.â
Deanâs heart soared at the sight he was met with in his bedroom: his beautiful Omega fast asleep with a soft smile on her face and an arm around each of their boys. Bobby and Charlie were curled into their mother, snoring softly and, he hoped, having pleasant dreams.
Quietly, he made his way over to the bed and gently stroked Bobbyâs hair, making him stir slightly. âCome on, buddy. Letâs get you to your own bed, huh?â he whispered as he lifted the still half-asleep little boy into his arms.
Your POV
You jolt awake at the movement, ready to start a war with whoever had disturbed your sleeping pups. Realising itâs Dean, you smile, settle back down, and watch as he lifts Bobby into his arms. A small smile flits across your Alphaâs face as the tired boy snuggles into his neck and immediately falls back asleep.
Dean walks around to the other side of the bed and expertly picks Charlie up one-handed, making heat pool in the base of your stomach. Dean smirks, and you know he can feel it too, but you donât care. Your big, strong Alpha is taking care of your pups; hormones or not, that is the sexiest thing in the world to you.
Your eyes drop to his ass as he walks out of your bedroom and carries your pups next door to their bedroom. Your mind drifts to the last time you and Dean had âalone timeâ two months ago. Youâd missed it; missed him, but you hadnât been in the best of health for most of this pregnancy, and itâd been the last thing on either of your minds until now. And right now, you need him. Desperately.
Youâd been surprised at how submissive Dean became in the bedroom when you were pregnant. It wasn't an Alpha tendency to let his Omega take control during sex, but something about you carrying his children made him soft and gentle, and allowed you to take what you wanted, how you wanted it.Â
âOh, I know that look!â Dean chuckles as he comes back into your shared bedroom.
âPants off and get your ass over here, Winchester!â you giggle, throwing your pyjama shorts at him.
âYes, maâam!â Dean smirks, quickly stripping off his clothes and climbing into bed.
As soon as heâs settled, you straddle his thighs and kiss him, shivering as his hands skim up your legs and tug at the hem of your shirt, pulling it up and over your head and throwing it to the floor.
âIâve missed this,â you sigh as you sink down on his length, moaning and rolling your eyes at the feeling of him stretching your walls.Â
Murmured voices wake you from a deep and peaceful sleep. Thereâs no suffocating but comforting heat surrounding you, so you know Dean is already up. Curiosity gets the better of you, and you climb out of your cosy nest and follow the murmuring into the kitchen.
âWhat are you doing up, sweetheart? Youâre supposed to be on bed rest,â Dean says, although his tone isnât as stern as you expect. Likely due to you reassuring him several times last night that you and the pup are fine.
âI heard voices,â you say, looking around at the faces smiling back at you. Jody, Donna, Jack, Rowena, Castiel, Eileen, and Sam â your whole extended pack are all huddled around in the kitchen. âWhatâs everyone doing here?â
âI asked them to come,â Rowena states. âI have information on the coven that needs all of your attentionââ
âExcept yours, Omega,â Dean states, his Alpha beginning to show its dominance to the pack. âYou donât need to be a part of this. You need to rest.â
âOh, nonsense, Dean. Trust me, I am fluent in pregnant omega, and I can assure you that both Y/N and the baby are completely fine and healthy,â Rowena smiles knowingly, and you frown at her. âAbout to give birth, but completely fine.â
âIâm sorry, what?â you panic.
âThatâs the other reason I asked everyone to come. Youâre about to give birth, dear. The stars have aligned, and a little⊠something last night pushed you along, but all is as it should be. Now, letâs get you comfortable and settled,â Rowena soothes. âYou need to save your energy. Youâre in for a long day. This precious little girl will not be born under the sign of Taurus.â
âIâm sorry, what?â you repeat, feeling your heart begin to hammer.
âOmega, calm down,â Dean instructs, and instantly, you take a deep, controlled breath to lower your increasing heartbeat.
âShe is meant to be a curious, intelligent, and witty little Gemini,â Rowena chuckles. âFunny, really, given that her brothers are twins!â
âButâŠâ you look at your watch. âThe sun is barely up.â The birth of the twins was long, and youâd hoped, based on everything everyone had told you, that things would go much quicker this time.
âLike I said, youâre in for a long day. Come, letâs get you in a warm bath to relax your cervix.â
âMy⊠what?â Youâre stunned. Youâre not due for another month, and the news that your daughter is coming early is not what you expected when you woke up this morning, and you wonder if this is all a dream.
âI know youâre not officially due for another five weeks, but the fates never lie, dear. This baby is coming today⊠Well, tomorrow, but you know what I mean,â Rowena pauses, another knowing smile gracing her porcelain face as she waits patiently for you to catch up with everything sheâs told you.
Your water breaks, and Rowena steps closer to you, taking your arm and guiding you towards the bathroom. âMy bag, please, Dean,â she calls over her shoulder. Â
âDean!â you yell, noticing heâs just as stunned as you are and has made no effort to follow you and Rowena.
âWhat? Oh⊠right. Iâm coming.â He springs into action, grabbing Rowenaâs bag as requested and following his wife and the witch down the hallway.
Dean hasnât left your bedroom for hours. In the early stages, heâd go and play with the twins for short bursts of time, but as your contractions became closer together, he stayed in the room, pacing like a caged animal as he impatiently waited to meet the newest member of his pack.
Youâd thought Rowena was playing a cruel joke on you when she said you wouldnât give birth until the following day, but now, at nineteen hours into your labour, you are exhausted and more than ready for your daughter to make her way into the world.
In a sudden whirlwind of activity after such a slow build-up, you cling desperately to Dean as he whispers how proud he is of you, and Rowena continuously encourages you to push, telling you itâs almost over.
Before youâve fully caught up with whatâs happening, a high-pitched wail erupts through the otherwise still and silent bunker. All of the pain, tiredness, and frustration vanish in a second, and all you want is to hold your little girl.
âThere we are, beautiful,â Rowena coos as she wraps the wriggling baby in a soft, pink blanket. âTime to meet your mummy!â The witch places the crying baby into your arms to start the scent bonding between you and your pup.
Knowing omegas are particularly protective and can be aggressive if disturbed before theyâve formed a bond with their children, Dean lets you be, staying back and watching on adoringly as you fuss over the little pink bundle in your arms.Â
âIâll go and let the others know. Theyâll be banging down the door in a minute if someone doesnât go and see them,â Rowena smiles, watching as the baby stops crying. The initial bond between you both is now complete. Â
âAlpha,â you finally say, chuckling as Deanâs face lights up, knowing exactly what youâre going to say next, and yet, he waits until you say the words.
âCome and meet our daughter.â
Dean climbs onto the bed and carefully takes your daughter in his arms, starting the scent bonding process all over again, this time between Alpha and his daughter.
Thereâs a knock at your bedroom door, and Dean looks to you for permission to grant them entry to your nestâyou and your babyâs safe haven. At your nod, Dean announces for them to enter, and you smile as the first visitor isnât Sam as you expect, but Castiel.
âRowena tells me the baby is beautiful like her mother and stubborn like her father,â he says as he walks slowly over to you. âThough I canât speak for her stubbornness yet, she is very beautiful.â
âThank you, Cass,â you beam.
âWould you allow me to bless your daughter?â the angel asks, and Dean once again looks to you for permission.
âOf course, Cass. Thank you,â you nod, giggling as you feel Deanâs anxiety levels rise at the possibility of his pup getting hurt.
âEasy, Alpha,â you soothe, placing your hand on his thigh. âThis isnât anything we and the boys havenât already been through. Sheâll be fine.â
âWhat is her name?â Cass asks, directing his question at Dean in an effort to help placate the tense Alpha.
âJoanna,â Dean smiles, feeling more and more at ease with every stroke of his Omegaâs hand over his thigh.
âIt is my pleasure to meet you, Joanna,â Cass says softly to the baby. âI can tell youâre feeling safe and happy in your fatherâs arms, and I promise you wonât feel anything.â The angel recites a prayer and a blessing, before bestowing the same angel wardings her parents, brothers, and uncle have.
âOf course, youâre already a daddyâs girl!â you chuckle softly, taking Joanna from Dean and looking her over to check she isnât showing any signs of discomfort from the angelâs protection ritual.
âThe twins are impatiently awaiting an introduction. Should I tell them they can come in, or do you need some more time to bond?â Cass asks, and you laugh again as Dean looks to you for permission, his puppy eyes almost rivalling his baby brotherâs.
âOf course they can come in! They need to meet their little sister!â you giggle softly as you feel Deanâs relief, the protective Alpha desperate to have all of his pups in the same room to keep a better eye on those who mean the most to him.
Sam brings the yawning, heavy-eyed twins into your room. They hadnât wanted to go to bed and miss the chance to meet their little sister, so they had fought valiantly to keep themselves awake. Their tiredness disappears as soon as they see the pink bundle of blankets in your arms, and they run over to your bed, carefully climb onto the mattress, and crawl closer, their eyes wide and already filled with love.
âBoys, this is Joanna,â you tell them, and smile encouragingly as Charlie moves closer.
âHi, Joanna,â Charlie whispers. âIâm Charlie, your big brother!â
âAnd Iâm Bobby. Your bigger brother. Iâm six minutes older than Charlie!â your other son adds, and you and Dean share a chuckle before settling down into your nest to rest with your growing family.Â
You wake a few hours later, knowing on instinct itâs because Joanna is hungry. Itâs a huge relief that youâve bonded with your baby because you hadnât really felt much from her until now, and with the twins, the connection was instant.
Feeding Joanna, you canât help but smile. Yes, youâre tired and sore, and you know itâs not going to be easy running around after three kids, but youâre happy. And thatâs all that matters, because a few years ago, you couldnât even imagine this would be your future, but now, even though the road was long and bumpy, you have all you need.
(Warnings: A bit of fluff before a whole lot of angst<3)
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You couldnât stop smiling as you watched Abel drawing, Thomas on your hip while Bullet slept at Abelâs feet. âWhatâre you making now?â you asked Abel, a hand on his head as you looked over the drawing âlet me guessâŠâ you hummed, narrowing your eyes at the drawing before smirking down at Abel âan elephant?â you asked and he laughed âyes!â he exclaimed and you chuckled, ruffling his hair before looking at Thomas, adjusting his shirt lovingly âI really missed you boysâŠâ you muttered to yourself, kissing the side of his head. âHey, how about a lollipop, hm?â you asked Abel and he grinned at you âyes!â
ââYesâ what?â
âPleaseâ Abel stated quickly and you chuckled, ruffling his hair before moving behind the counter, getting out one of the lollipops, walking back around to the table that Abel sat at. âThere you go, monsterâ you gave it to him and he took it, unwrapping it and putting it in his mouth instantly, going back to drawing and you watched him with a smile. Jax had told you very little, just that Tara was okay and she was going to be okay, that the boys were okay and that you needed to trust him⊠the last part made you worry endlessly though, it meant he was going to do something risky or stupid or impossible. Or all three together. âHey, (Y/N/N)â Happy called and you looked at him, watching him as he nodded towards Thomas, offering to take him and you frowned âI can hold him-â
âYouâre pregnantâ he pointed out and you scoffed but relented, giving him Thomas carefully âIâm three months, not sixâ you pointed out and he shrugged, making you sigh and smile a little. You looked back at Abel, your smile quickly gone as your eyes widened âAbel!â you snapped, Abel grinning mischievously as he pulled the lollipop away from Bullet before he could lick it, Abel putting it back into his mouth while Bullet looked up at him expectantly and you couldnât help but smile while trying to remain stern âdonât give your lollipop to the dog, Abelâ you tried to scold but all you could do was smile as he looked like a mischievous little devil. An adorable mischievous devil. And he knew it, he knew how cute he was and you sighed âno more lollipops for the dogâ you warned, patting your thigh, Bullet getting up and walking over to you, jumping up with his front paws on your thigh and you leaned down, petting him and kissing the top of his head before straightening your leg, leaving him to drop down and walk off to find some other place to rest, somewhere where lollipops wouldnât be shoved down into his face, probably. âYou sure you should be up and about?â Tig asked and you scoffed, straightening your back a little as you narrowed your eyes at him âwhatâs that supposed to mean?â you asked, a hand on your hip and Tig froze up âI-... just meant-â
âTell you what; when I canât see my feet anymore because of the literal watermelon sized person inside of me, then Iâll sit back and allow you boys to dick around without the supervision of an adultâ you stated sharply, Tig staring at you with wide eyes and you raised your brows at him âgot it?â
âYes, mommyâ he muttered without even realizing it and you scoffed, looking away until you heard Brooke groan âoh, ew! Tig!â she snapped, turning away with a cringe and when you looked back, you realized that Tig had a boner, a small smirk forming on your lips. Somehow it was good to know that even while pregnant you could still get him hard by doing nothing. Which really wasnât all that hard (heh) when it was Tiggy, but still. âYou got a problem there, Tiggy bearâ you teased, Tig looked down, adjusting his pants awkwardly before shrugging a little âjust⊠Iâll just go, andâŠâ
âYeah, good ideaâ you stated with amusement and he nodded and left, a large grin on your face as you chuckled lightly with the boys. Until Chibs, Bobby and Jax came down. Your smile faded at the look on their faces, one of your hands moving to your stomach as Chibs approached and you looked at him and then at Jax, Tig appearing from the bathroom, adjusting his pants casually until he noticed the change in atmosphere. âAt six tonight, Patterson will come to pick me up. Sheâs going to arrest me for the KG-9âs, just me and not the clubâŠâ Jax began and you frowned at him, your heart starting to race as you listened to him, his plan. You felt Chibs wrap his arms around you from behind as Jax told everyone of his plan, your knees felt weak and they almost buckled but Chibs caught you, as though he knew this would happen, your heart racing as you clung to him, trying to stay strong for Abel and Thomas, and for Jax.
You couldnât help the tears on your cheeks as you watched him hug the boys, his sons, your heart racing and you took Thomas from him, Abel standing by Chibsâ leg, holding onto it while looking up at his dad. âTaraâll come pick them up after I goâ Jax told Chibs, Chibs nodding, holding his face briefly before letting go. You watched as Jax went around, saying goodbye to everyone and when he came to you and Chibs, you watched with tears streaming down your face as Chibs and Jax hugged as they said their goodbyes. âTake care of my sisterâ Jax told Chibs and he nodded âaye, I willâŠâ
âAnd my nieceâ Jax added with a small smirk and Chibs nodded âTha mi aâ gealltainn, a bhrĂ thair(I promise, brother)â Chibs said softly and Jax nodded, tears falling down Chibsâ cheeks as he turned to you, gently taking Thomas from you so you could hug Jax, and hug him, you did. âIâll come visit⊠every day. Every fucking day, Iâll come visit youâ you whispered, Jax hugging you a tad tighter âI know⊠Iâve spoken with Tara, sheâll give you full access to the boys, no matter where they are or when, anytime you want, you can see your nephewsâ he whispered and you parted from him with a frown, confusion written all over your face âh-howâd you get her to do that?â
âShe suggested itâ Jax revealed and your lower lip trembled, more tears forming in your eyes and Jax smiled softly at you âhey, itâs okayâ he whispered and you felt as though your world was on fire, burning brightly and destroying everything. âLike fuck it is, my brother is going to jailâ you muttered and Jax smirked with amusement âwonât be anything new, darlinâ... itâs okayâ he promised and you nodded weakly, looking back up at him, Jax cupping your face in his hands âtake care of yourself, and my nieceâŠâ
âNiece?â
âI got a hunchâ he stated with a smirk and you let out a brief laugh that bled into a quiet sob. âHey,â he made sure you looked at him, an accepting smile on his face, calm and collected and accepting of his fate âcheer up, sis, youâre gonna be a momâ he stated and you couldnât help but smile âyouâll always be my brother, Jaxâ you whispered and he nodded with a smile âand youâll always be my sisterâ he stated and you nodded, Jax pulling you into a tight hug, holding you close. âTake care of Chibs for me, alright?â he asked and you nodded, kissing his cheek as you stepped back, looking up at Chibs, carefully taking Thomas from him, kissing the side of Thomasâ head, Jax smiling at you, tears in his eyes âyouâre going to be the most wonderful mom everâ Jax stated, voice breaking slightly and you nodded âand youâre the best father they could ever hope forâ you assured him and he nodded, wiping away a few of his tears before stepping closer, kissing your forehead. Jax stepped back, giving you a forced smile but you could see how hard he tried, how hard it was for him to stay strong like this, to not break down in tears.
You were one of the first ones to walk back inside, Thomas still in your arms as you held him, walking over to one of the stools, sitting down on it and leaning back against the counter, your arms wrapped around Thomas as you tried not to cry, Chibs following after you, sitting down next to you and wrapping an arm around you, kissing the top of your head as he held you close, Thomas asleep in your arms as the others went back inside as well, Bullet playing quietly with Zora while Abel played with Chucky and one of his prosthetic hands.
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You gave him a small smile as you walked towards him, sitting down in front of him, putting your bag on the floor before looking back up at him. âHeyâŠâ you started, studying his vacant stare as he looked off to the side and you frowned after a while of silence. âJax?â you asked softly, trying to catch his gaze but it didnât work, he only looked further away from you and you nodded, sighing softly. âJax?... Please, donât shut me outâ you asked softly, seeing tears form in his eyes and as wrong as it may have been, it made you happy. He was still in there, somewhere. You leaned down and dug through your bag, taking out a black and white picture, showing it to him, sliding it over to his side of the table in front of you. You waited patiently as Jaxâs eyes moved to the picture, his brows furrowing a little and finally he moved, reaching for the picture, lifting it and looking at it, his brows easing up when he realized what it was. It was a sonogram picture.
âWeâre not sure if itâs a boy or a girl yet but weâve started on namesâ you admitted quietly, tears forming in your eyes as you watched his eyes water as he kept looking at the picture. âI-I kind of like âJenniferâ or maybe âOscarââ you admitted hesitantly, smiling ever so slightly as you kept your eyes on him âChibs like âRossâ or âHannahââ you added, watching as a single tear ran down Jaxâs cheek. You reached over and held his hand in yours, making him look up at you and you gave him a faint smile âthere you areâ you muttered quietly, Jaxâs lower lip trembling as he smiled briefly, so briefly that you almost didnât notice it, but you caught it, you saw it. As you held his hand, he looked back down at the sonogram, nodding ever so slightly, sniffling quietly as he gave you back the picture and you took it with a fond smile, letting go of his hand to pack the picture away in your bag.
âI love you, Jax⊠you know that, right?â you asked with a small frown and he nodded âI love you too, sisâ he murmured and you nodded with a smile âI know⊠Iâve been working a lot at Scoopâs, made a small area in the back for when Tig brings Zora or I bring Bullet, itâs fenced, has toys, food, water, everything. Scoops is starting to look pretty good, actually, almost like a real ice cream shopâ you half-joked and he scoffed with a smirk, looking down âalmostâ he repeated and you nodded âyeah, almost⊠I like working there, honestly⊠I like cleaning up the place with Chucky and Brooke, though Brooke has mostly been at Gemmaâs recently. I think thereâs something between her and Rat.â
âWhat?â Jax looked up at you and you shrugged with a smirk, leaning a little closer âI think the Rat is getting a bit of secret cheeseâ you whispered and Jax scoffed with slight amusement as you leaned back in your chair again. âWeâve even begun to have a few customers. Theyâre rare and few, but theyâre there, itâs mostly kids. A couple tried to steal a few things but the boys caught themâ you admitted with amusement, a scoff leaving you âthey ended up paying half for what they took and worked the other half off, just a day of cleaning up the place, since none of them took a pipe wrench to the windowâ you joked lightly and Jax nodded with a small smile as he looked down âitâs good youâre looking after the place, and the othersâŠâ he stated and you nodded âitâs what family is for. By the way, I demand free ice cream for the rest of my life, itâs simply my price for working there, Chucky agreesâ you stated casually and he nodded âdealâ he murmured and you smiled at him. A small silence fell over the two of you and you enjoyed it before breaking it, knowing it had to be done at one point or another. âYouâre alive, Jaxâ you said and he looked up at you with slight confusion, making you smile a little more âyouâre breathing, your heart is beating in your chest, your lungs breathe air and your blood is rushing through your veins,â you reminded him, leaning a little closer to him âyouâre alive, Jackson Teller⊠so are all of us. Your mother, me, Chibs, Tig, Happy, Bobby⊠your boysâ you said the last ones carefully, watching him tense and you gave him a soft smile, an attempt at comforting him âlife is shit, Jax, now more than ever, but those who love you are alive. We matter to you, and you matter to usâ you reminded him âplus, Abelâs got some serious skills with a crayonâ you added half-jokingly and Jax gave you a half-genuine smile âyou can see it when you come out⊠Iâll come back when I can, okay?â you asked as you heard the buzzer go off, leading you to get up and pick up your bag. âYou donât have to-â
âYes, I doâ you interrupted with a soft smile. âStay strong, JacksonâŠâ you asked softly, only leaving when he gave a faint nod and you nodded in return, leaving, casting a final glance over your shoulder at him before you were forced out now that your time was up with him.
I just recently binged all of SOA and have moved onto devouring fanfics because I canât let go (particularly with Chibs). This has been one of the best Iâve read. I hope it gets picked up again soon.
Summary: Y/N Y/L/N and Jeffrey Dean Morgan have been a successful porn couple for a few years. When Jeff decides itâs time to retire, he helps Y/N find a replacement who might become more than just a porn partner.
Pairing: Jeffrey Dean Morgan x Reader | Reader x Others (mentioned)
Rating: 18+ Only
Bingo Square: Pornstar!AU for @j3bingo
Warnings: tw: porn, tw: filming porn, tw: stepfather/stepdaughter porn, tw: teacher/student porn, language, p in v, daddy kink, creampie, mentions of drugs, oral sex (f and m rec).
Word Count: 2.4k
A/N: A huge thank you to @princessmisery666 for the encouraging words when I started reading this one. It was meant to be a one shot until we started chatting about this one! Another big thank you to the beautiful @negans-lucille-tblr for betaing this for me đ
I hope you all enjoy my first ever Jeffrey Dean Morgan fic! If he's not your thing, don't worry! Jensen will take his place in the next part!
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Y/NâS POV
âYeah, thatâs it, sweetheart, take Daddyâs cock like the good girl I know you are,â Jeff grunts in his alter ego, Mike Hammers, voice as he pushes his huge, throbbing cock into your tight, perfect pussy.
âOh, Daddy! Youâre so much bigger than my boyfriend! It feels so good!â you moan seductively in the character of Roxy Wilde, widening your legs and looking down your body just in time to see your stepfatherâs cock disappear entirely inside you, making your moans louder.
âYeah, baby girl, thatâs it! I canât believe Iâm finally fucking my stepdaughter! What would your mother say, huh? Seeing her little girl all spread out fâme. Being a good girl and giving her daddy what he needs.â Jeff begins to thrust harder and faster, pulling your legs this way and that way, spreading your lips with his fingers to emphasise just how much his big dick is stretching your pussy for the camera.
Jeffâs hands slide up your body and toy with your tits as he increases his pace, and your moans get louder and louder. âFuck, baby girl, Daddyâs gonna cum inside you, okay?â
âYes! Daddy, please! Want your cum!â you scream, and Jeff stills, grunting as he cums.
Pulling himself from your centre, he growls as he watches his cum spill from your stretched hole and strokes your clit, using his fingers to push his seed back inside where it belongs.
âCUT! Thatâs lunch, everybody!â
JEFFâS POV
Sitting on the couch in his dressing room, he lets his head fall back with a huff. Heâd been reflecting a lot on his future recently, and he knew he needed to talk to Y/N about how he was feeling soon.
Their older man/younger woman videos had skyrocketed him to the top of the game at a time when heâd started to feel his age in this industry. Heâd been ready to say goodbye to his porn days when Y/N burst on the scene and asked him to be her partner exclusively. He agreed because the constant stream of coked out of their heads, super slutty women he had to fuck on camera, were becoming too much for him.
That, and she was fucking gorgeous. The idea that heâd only fuck one person and sheâd only fuck him in return really appealed to him and made him change his mind. He decided to stay with her for a little while and see what happened.
It turned out that it was a great decision because she made him a very wealthy man. Still, that feeling was back again. The feeling that the wrinkles and the bags under his eyes were showing his age. He can also feel it in his body and knows heâs almost at the point where he canât keep up with a woman more than half his age anymore.
A knock at his door brings him out of his thoughts. He smiles when the door opens, and Y/N pokes her head through. âHey, Jeff. You got a minute?â
âAlways for you, darlinâ, you know that,â he responds. Theyâd forged themselves a deep friendship in the few years theyâd worked together.
âSo, I was wondering,â Y/N starts, jumping up on the dresser and crossing her legs, âif youâre okay.â
âWhat do you mean?â Jeff asks, tilting his head at her question.
âWell, youâve been really quiet on our last couple of shoots, and if Iâve done something or pushed you out of your comfort zone, please tell me. You and I, weâve always had a great relationship, and the trust we have means weâre more willing to push our limits andââ
âHey now, itâs nothing youâve done, I promise. Iâve just been feeling like itâs time for me to retire,â Jeff says, knowing he canât get anything past her, so he might as well come clean now.
âOh. Okay. Why?â Y/N asks, tilting her head this time.
âItâs just time, darlinâ. Iâm old and tired. And itâs getting harder and harder to keep up with you,â Jeff chuckles at her laugh. âIâm at the end of my career, and youâre just starting yours. I donât want to hold you back.â
âYou could never hold me back, Jeff. But if thatâs how youâre feeling and what you want to do, you know Iâm here for you.â
âThanks, Y/N. I appreciate that. And donât worry, I wonât leave you until I find someone worthy to replace me as your partner. Thatâs if you want to keep working this way, with just one partner?â
âYeah, I do. Iâve never trusted a screen partner more than I trust you. And because of that, weâve grown and expanded our⊠horizons,â she grins. Jeff laughs, knowing she means experimenting with things they wonât normally do with a one-time screen partner.Â
Trust was increasingly hard to come by in this industry. There were a lot of assholes in itâactors and crewâwho thought they could get away with anything they wanted and treat the female cast any way they wanted to. It was the main reason more and more female actors were coupling up like they had and why the ones that didnât were turning more and more to drugs.
âOh, offering to audition and approve my new partner, are you?â Y/N smirks.
âYes. And I wonât quit until weâre both happy with him.â
âAw, Jeff! You know youâre my screen dad and not my real one, right?â Y/N teases as she hops off the dresser and walks over to the couch. Jeff chuckles as she crawls into his lap and hugs him tightly. âBut thank you. Itâs not your responsibility, but Iâd appreciate your help, and you know Iâd trust whatever you said about the new guy.â
âGood. I want you to have another partner like meâone whoâll be good to you and you can trust completely.â Jeff wraps his arms around her waist and squeezes her tight.
âIs there anything I can do to make you reconsider?â Y/N pulls away to ask.
âNo, darlinâ. Iâm getting too old for this,â Jeff kisses her forehead. âAnd for you.â
âWould you stop! You are not old. You are handsome and fit as fuck, and youâd have plenty more years in you if you wanted them. If you want to find another partner, you know Iâm cool with that, too. You donât need to stay with me.â
âY/N, I stayed in this business three more years because of you. And I have loved every second of it. Iâve never worked with anyone better in this industry, and I wanna go out on that high.â
âYouâre absolutely sure?â Y/N checks with him one last time.
âYes. Absolutely, completely, utterly sure,â Jeff reassures her.
âWell, alright then. I respect your decision, and I fully support it. And you,â she kisses his cheek and climbs off his lap.
âThanks, darlinâ. That means the world to me.â
âMiss Wilde, this grade disappoints me. Itâs not like you to get a C in English. Care to explain yourself?â Jeff leans back in his chair and subtly takes in the âpupilâ in front of him: short skirt, bare legs, chest close to bursting out of her shirt.
âIâm sorry, Mr Hammers. I know itâs no excuse, but Tommy⊠he, uhâŠâ Y/N sniffles.
âItâs okay, Miss Wilde,â Jeff softens his tone. âTell me what happened with Tommy?â
âWe were dating, and I was warned about him, but I didnât listen⊠he only wanted one thing from me. Once he got it, he dumped me and moved on to Stephanie.â Tears blackened by cheap mascara and eyeliner cascade down Y/Nâs face.
âTommy took your innocence and then dumped you?â Jeff reaches his fingers out and lightly strokes her thigh. She doesnât speak, only nodding in response and taking a tissue from the box to wipe her tears away.
âYou poor girl,â Jeff sympathises. âYou must feel so vulnerable and worthless. To give something so precious to someone so careless and undeserving is⊠itâs devastating.â He stands and saunters to the classroom door, flicks the lock and pulls the blind down before slowly moving back towards Y/N, who is still standing at the desk, her back to him.
He gently places a hand on her shoulder, turns her around and pushes her back into the desk. âYou know, I see this way too often,â Jeff drawls as his fingers play with the hem of her skirt. âBoys like Tommy think they know what theyâre doing with women. But theyâre just little boys that donât have a clue how to⊠pleasure,â he confidently traces his fingers under her skirt and places them over her cotton-covered centre. âItâs a shame how little they know about the female body,â he murmurs into her neck.
Y/N whimpers and unconsciously opens her legs a little wider, allowing Jeff to cup her pussy with his wandering hand. His thumb flicks over her clit, and she whimpers again.
âMr Hammers, sir, what are you doing?â she whines but makes no effort to bat his hands away.
âLet me show you,â Jeff whispers. âLet me show you what it can be like, and Iâll let you resit the test, give you that A we both know youâre more than capable of getting.â
Y/N nods, eyes wide and innocent, and Jeff grins. He lifts her onto the desk, pulls her panties down and pushes her legs wide as he drops to his knees and pleasures her with his tongue.
Making porn videos is a bizarre experience. It isnât sex; Y/Nâs over-exaggerated moans and screams prove that, and so did the lube she usually needed to get ready for a video shoot. For guys, itâs much easier. There arenât many men who wouldnât get hard when a beautiful woman is naked on her knees and sucking their dicks, or spreading their legs for them.
It amazes Jeff that, after filming four videos almost every week for three years, Y/Nâs pussy is still as tight as the first day he sank his dick inside her. And he still has to calm himself down sometimes so as not to end the video too soon. Heâll miss this when he retires. What forty-something-year-old man didnât want to be balls deep in a gorgeous woman half his age?
âPlease, Mr Hammers, Iâm not⊠Iâm not on birth control,â Y/N gasps in her âRoxyâ voice. A deeper, more sultry version of her own. âPlease, donât finish inside me!â
âI wonât, sweetheart,â he replies as he slams into her harder. Theyâre at the end game now. Itâs time to wrap this up. Make Roxy âcumâ one last time before he covers as much of her body as he can with his release.
Jeff has always admired Y/Nâs fake orgasms. They arenât exaggerated or overly loud, which heâs grateful for. Maybe being in the industry has desensitised him to porn. Still, anytime he does watch it, the pathetically fake screeching âorgasmsâ made him softer than thoughts of his ninety-year-old grandma naked.
âAlright, Miss Wilde, are you ready for that A?â he grunts, pulling himself from her warm, wet centre and jerking his cock over her body.
âYes, Mr Hammers, please. My father will kill me if I go home with a C,â Y/N whimpers, spreading her legs wider, making sure the camera gets a good view of Jeffâs cum splattering all over her tits, stomach and pussy.
Y/NâS POV
THREE MONTHS LATER
Word spread quickly about Jeffâs retirement and that you were looking for a new partner. Over fifty men had applied for the job, and your management team, with the help of Jeff, had filtered that down to half. The remaining men were put through a stringent interview process, and thorough checks were done on every one of them. The eighteen who successfully passed were invited to audition.
Today was the third and last day, and you were relieved it was almost over. Taking six different dicks three days in a row wasnât as fun as people assumed. You were tired, drained, and sore, and the sooner this was over, the sooner you could take a well-needed break from porn and dicks and lube and fake orgasms.
Not one guy has given you the same feeling Jeff did so far. You havenât felt a good vibe from any of them yet, and the chemistry was appallingly bad. Only two men still had to audition, and you were quickly losing hope and the will to live.
âJensen Ackles to the set, please,â your agent calls. You put your professional face back on, forcing a small smile and soft eyes for the owner of dick number seventeen of the eighteen youâll have fucked in the past three days.
âUhm, hey! Iâm Jensen,â he says as he walks into the room, making sure to shake hands with every person there, leaving you until last.
âMiss Y/L/N, itâs a pleasure to meet you. Thank you for taking the time to see me. I appreciate the opportunity.â This guy was more like it: professional, polite, charming, gentlemanly, and obscenely attractive. It reminded you of when you met Jeff and the attributes that drew you to him and made you beg him to be your partner.
âOh no, thank you for taking the time to audition, Mr Ackles,â you smile as you shake his offered hand, pleasantly surprised when he raises it to his lips and kisses your knuckles.
Jensen mustâve seen your shock, quickly lowering your hand. âIâm sorry, this Texas boy was raised to always show the utmost respect to women. Old habits die hard!â he chuckles, and you giggle. Yes, giggle. Like a lovesick teenager.
âDonât apologise for that. I find it cute!â Youâre sure you have heart-eyes right about now, and quickly check yourself. âAlright, youâve read the scene?â you ask, getting back to business and smiling when Jensen nods. âAnything in there that youâre unsure of or uncomfortable with?â
âNo. Itâs all pretty standard. Iâm happy to do this how itâs written if you are?â Jensen replies, and you grin at his sweetness.
âThen letâs get to it! Everyone ready?â You check with your team and the few crew members there to ensure the audio and visual equipment runs as it should. âAlright. Places, everyone.â
Warnings: the barn scene(15x20), major angst, injuries, medical nonsense, established Wincest, a/b/o dynamics, mpreg, talk of death/suicide, suicidal ideation, hints of depression, addiction, prescription drug abuse, unrealistic drug recovery, self-loathing, discussions of disability and wheelchair use, smut (hj, anallingus, anal), bits of fluff
Word Count: 6100+
Prompt: Renewal of Mating Vows
This was written for The Pond's Secret Santa Fic Exchange, @samanddean76 Happy Holidays and I hope you enjoy this fic =)
No beta, all mistakes are mine - I tend to have tense issues, I know. Thanks to @pink-sparkly-witch for letting me bounce ideas in off her, and @synmorite for indulging in my ADHD-addled ramblings đ Love you both â€ïž
This fic includes potentially triggering content and is intended for mature audiences only. You are responsible for your own media consumption, read the warnings and if you see something that will trigger you please move along. If you have any questions about the warnings/tags please feel free to DM me.
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âI feelâ Thereâs something in my back,â Dean grunts as Sam sheathes his machete, chest heaving and a sheen of sweat covering his body. The Omegaâs scent was the only thing keeping Deanâs Alpha calm, and letting him think before acting, making his injury worse. Alphas were stronger than your average human, and if heâd been a Beta, there was no way that he would survive. He has a fighting chanceâ as long as he doesn't bleed to death first.
âOh, okay, Iâ let meâŠâ Sam approaches his brotherâhis Alphaâ and inspects the wound. Blood plumes on the center of Deanâs back, and he isnât sure what he should do next. Moving Dean off whatever is going through him could be more dangerous than leaving him on, especially considering where they are. The fucking vamps werenât entirely stupid, unfortunately, and chose a place that was perfect for them to kill those little boys, but it meant Sam and Dean were now miles away from any useful help.
This is way beyond anything either of them could fix themselves, if Cas or Jack were still around, he could call to them. But, that wasnât possible, not anymore. Sam runs through the options in his head, a crossroads demon - even if they were close enough, wonât deal. A spell from Rowenaâs journals could help, but they werenât here, and even if they were, Dean didnât have the time for Sam to search through them. There is really only one thing he could do, break the cardinal rule of stay away from hospitals unless youâre actively dying, and Dean was very much going to die if Sam didnât act quick.
âIâm fading pretty fast. I needâ I need to tell you something,â Dean chokes out and Sam notices blood now also staining the corners of Deanâs mouth. He grabs his phone from his back pocket, and dials 911. He can hear a strained protest from Dean, but Sam ignores him, giving the barnâs location and begs them to hurry. âNoâ Sammy.â
âDean,â Sam says with a stuttering breath, âI canâtâ thereâs nothing I can do. You need them.â
Dean knows it wonât do any good. He can feel the life draining as his vision slowly starts to tunnel. He needs Sam to know how much he loves him, how proud of him he is. âSammy,â the word pains him to say, with each breath getting harder to take. âCâmere, please,â he tries to beckon Sam with his hand. âPlease, Sam.â
Tears well in Samâs eyes, as he moves closer to Dean. âYou just need to hang on a little longer, Alpha. The ambulanceâ itâll be here soonâ stay with me Alpha, please.â
âHey. I'm not leaving you. I'm gonna be with you... right here,â Dean places his hand over Samâs heart, âevery day.â Sam canât stop the tears from escaping, and he lets out a strangled cry. âI'll be there every step. I love you so much my baby brother. My Omega.â
âAlpha,â Sam cries, cupping Deanâs face in his hands. He presses a gentle kiss on Deanâs lips and moves a hand down placing it over his heart. Dean didnât say the words I love you often, in fact, Sam could count on both hands how many times heâd said it the last ten years, ever since Dean had claimed and put his mark on Samâ there wasnât a need for it. He showed his love for Sam in his own way with small gestures; presenting Sam with a new book to add to the vast collection in their library or even with just a squeeze of his hand.Â
âI need you to... I need you to promise me,â Dean presses his forehead against Samâs, and covers his hand with his own. âI need you to tell meââ Dean chokes, a tear slipping down his cheek. "I need you to tell me that it's okay. Please, Sammy, âMega, I need to know youâll be okay, I canâtââ
âDean, I can hear them, just a few more minutes. Donât give up, Alpha.â
Dean thinks that maybe he can hear the faintest sounds of the sirens approaching, but he knows itâs too late. If anyone asked him ten years ago howâd he thought heâd go out, he wouldâve told them something not unlike this, saving the day, his brother by his side. But when he finally claimed Sam, something in him, his Alpha, his hopes for the future changed. He and Sam were even starting to entertain the idea of pups one day, but it was all just a foolâsâ a hunterâs dream. Each breath becomes strangled and Dean knows he canât hold on much longer. âI need you to let me go, Sammy.â
âNo,â Sam shakes his head, âdonât ask me to do that. Please, Alpha, I need you to stay. I canât do this without you.â
âYes, you can.â
âWell, I donât want to,â Sam chokes out. He can see it, the life fading from Deanâs eyes, his breathing becoming more ragged.
Deanâs vision tunnels, a fuzzy haze sounds in his ears as he looks over his Mate one final time, memorizing every line on his face, and uses what little strength he has left to pull Sam to him, their hands still entwined over his heart, and whispers against his lips, âgoodbye, Sam,â before letting the darkness consume him.
Four months later
Sam walks the aisle of the grocery store, absent-mindedly rubbing the small swell of his stomach and filling the cart, checking the items off the list, before heading into the baby aisle and grabbing a few of the essentials. Heâd started doing this months ago, figuring if he buys a pack of diapers, wipes and other items at every shopping trip he could make a small stockpile, and once the pup arrived he wouldnât have to worry about not having anything. His pregnancy was a surprise, unexpected, to say the very least, coming at the worst time in his life.
He garnered a sympathetic look from the older lady behind the counter, her eyes falling to his belly, the lack of ring on his hand, and the faded mark on his neck. There was barely even a scent of Alphaâ of Deanâon him anymore. Sam kept all the things that still had the strong scent at home, needing them to build his nest, and when he went out, he wore one of Deanâs shirts to keep the more bold alphas at bay.
Sam pulls into the driveway of his seemingly, unsuspecting house. It was a normal neighborhood, quiet, no one to ask questions. He grabs as many bags as he can, walking past the tarp-covered Impala, and into the side door that leads directly into the kitchen, making a mental note to go back for the babyâs things once everything is put into its proper place.Â
A light padding of feet brings Samâs attention to Miracle, who wags his tail at Sam as he gives the shaggy dog a scratch behind his ears. The dog whines, standing up on his hind legs and placing his paws on Samâs torso. âYou hungry, boy?â he asks, noticing the empty dish, and gently pushes the dog away. âAlright, here you go,â he says, irritation filling him as he pours kibble into the bowl, before continuing to put everything away, letting the chomping of food bring him some sort of solace as he calms himself.
Sam grabs the babyâs items out of the bed of the truck, watching with a small smile as Miracle runs around the front yard. He'd been cooped up in the house since last night, and needs to let out his energy before another case of the zoomies destroys the living room. Sam smiles politely and waves as a neighbor walks by, praying that she wonât corner him and try to pry information out of him. Ever since theyâd moved here, he was the hot topic of neighborhood gossip.
After determining that Miracle was satiated, he whistles and Miracle trots into the house behind him. He makes his way towards what was decidedly the babyâs room, though there wasnât much to show of it yet. A crib box leans against a wall, a car seat box sits next to it along with bags of baby supplies. He knows thereâs still plenty of time to set everything up, but makes the mental note to start working on it sooner rather than later, especially with how things are now.Â
Sam closes the door softly behind him, and heads back towards the kitchen. Some days are easier than others when it comes to taking care of himself, and today isnât one of them. He plans to make a bigger dinner so he settles for a sandwich and chips, and it does enough to settle the hunger pangs in his stomach. He makes another nearly identical plate, and places it on a tray, along with a medicine cup with the set amount of pills.
Thereâs a glow coming from underneath the door of the master bedroom, and the low hum of the tv tells him that Deanâs awake. He knocks slightly on the door before entering, not waiting for permission, only to see Dean reclined in the hospital bed that took up a large section of the room. Dean doesnât acknowledge his presence with more than a flicker of his eyes. His hair had grown out significantly, revivaling Samâs length, and a scraggly beard, which Sam didnât mind, but it wasnât groomed. Deanâs eyes had dark circles around them, but they stayed glued to the tv until Sam physically put himself between it and Dean.
âBrought you some lunch,â Sam says as he sets the tray down. âI know itâs not a lot, but I thought tonight I could try my hand at Winchester Surprise,â Sam smiles, hoping to get a reactionâ a smile, a laugh, hell heâd even take a scoff at this point. âYou have your PT today, Jesse says youâre making really good progress,â he hands Dean the cup, but they both knew it wasnât true. Sam had to force Dean to go to every appointment, and he wouldnât even allow him to join in, so he really wasnât sure how well it was going.
It truly was a miracle that Dean survived the damage to his spineâ paramedics arrived just after heâd lost consciousness, and because of their quick actions, Dean was saved. Sam had never been so terrified, Dean had to be transported with the rebar still lodged into his spine, and he helplessly watched as he coded two more times in the ambulance before they arrived at the hospital and he was rushed into surgery. Dean was on the operating table for hours upon hours, and by the time the sun came up a surgeon gave Sam the news that Dean was going to be okay.
âI thought you could come with me to my appointment too,â Sam suggests as Dean gulps down the pills. âItâs a scan too, we can see the pup, they might be able to tell us if theyâre a boy or girl, if they decide to cooperate this time. They must get their stubbornness from you,â Sam jokes. âWe can stop at that bakery, get my Alpha his favorite pie?â
âWhatever,â Dean grunts, taking the sandwich off the plate, still not making eye contact with Sam. He hated this, the damage done to his spine nearly left him paralyzed. The surgeons, he was told, were able to fix the nerve damage to an extent, heâd have to essentially learn how to walk again and even relearn how to do some motor skills in his hands. Surprisingly, relearning some functions in his hands and arms was the easy part and for a brief time things were almost back to normal between him and Sam. But, when Sam told him that he was going to be a father, he started pushing himself harder. Too hard. He aggravated the nerve damage, leading him to be operated on again, and even worse a heavy reliance on Oxycodoneâ the pain was unbearable, PT wasnât helping, but the oxy helped numbed him. Dean doesnât know when it happened exactly, but at some point he just couldnât, no matter how hard he tried, get out of bed and rejoin the world.
Heâs the Alpha, he should be taking care of Samâ Sam who was doing everything to keep things positive, he was carrying Deanâs pup, he should be nesting, getting ready for the pup, but everyday heâs here, taking care of Dean. Making sure he eats, showers, goes to PT, takes him to all his appointments, and yet, he couldnât muster the same energy for him. The wheelchair in the corner of the room taunts him. He was nearly ready to stop using it entirely, relying just on a cane before he went and pushed himself too hard and set himself back months.
Itâs nearly 5 by the time Sam and Dean get back home. His PT went about how it always does- Sam sits out in the waiting room, and he makes minimal progress but itâs treated as if heâd ran a marathon. Samâs appointment was in the same building, and he couldnât contain his excitement as the technician called out Winchester. No one knew they were brothers here, and while sibling matings were not illegal, they werenât exactly common, especially between brothers. They just accepted they were mates and moved on. Sam was elated when he saw their pup on the screen, counting 10 fingers and 10 toes, noticing that the pup already appeared to have his nose and Deanâs lips. He hoped the pup would have Deanâs eyes too, he was excited to meet them, but he still had nearly three months to go. Dean was quiet throughout the appointment, Sam asked him not to push himself too hard, and now even though neither of them would say the words out loud, they both knew Dean had fallen into a deep depression.
âWould you like to know the sex?â the sonographer asks as she rolls the wand over Samâs swollen belly. âThe pupâs in the perfect position.â Sam looks over to Dean who is frustratingly staring off into space. If he wasnât going to be present, he couldâve stayed in the waiting area. He knows Deanâs hurting and frustrated with his setback in healing, but this is the first time Samâs asked anything of him in months, and he couldnât even pretend to be interested in their growing family.Â
âYes,â Sam nods his head, âplease.â
âItâs a boy!â The doctor beams, âCongratulations Sam, Dean.â Dean doesnât acknowledge her words, or make any indication that he even heard what she said. The doctor continues examining the pup, stating that everything appears to be normal, but because of Samâs âadvancedâ age, which wasnât entirely wrong, most Omegaâs didnât wait until their late thirties to have their first pup, but life didnât afford him that convenience, she asks that Sam comes back in a month for another scan. âYouâre doing great, Sam,â she says as she ends the exam. âRemember to not push yourself too hard, keep up the healthy eating, but listen to your body.â She prints out several pictures of the pup, and Sam mentally notes to replace the oneâs from his previous scan on the bedside table.
Dean doesnât say anything. He can feel Sam staring daggers into him, but he canât open his mouth and say the words he wants to. A boy, he was going to have a son, and here he was barely able to walk for more than a few minutes at a time. He couldnât even keep up with Miracle, he couldnât do much more than lay in bed and take oxy after oxy after oxy. It was a problemâ he watched Sam struggle with his addiction, and he recognized the signs within himself, but the fear of the pain that he knew awaited him when he would no longer be getting them through legitimate means. Heâd already solved that problem long ago, practically unlimited money and virtual doctorâs appointments meant he was able to get his hands on more pills than he could ever need.
He isnât stupid, Sam monitors his pill intake closely, and he knows how easily it would be for him to overdose, and heâs thought about it on more than one occasion. Whatâs stopped him from doing it, heâs not entirely sure, maybe it's the thought of leaving Sam pregnant and alone, Omegaâs werenât known to survive long without their Alphaâsâ the only thing that he could do is let their Mating Bond break. It was easy enough, push Sam away, no marking, scent or otherwise, no fucking, distancing himself would, in the end be the best thing for Sam and the pup, and maybe one day he would be able to find another Alpha to take care of him. Of their son.
Sam offers Dean a hand as he opens the truckâs door. Dean pushes it away and lets out an annoyed huff, they both know that Dean could make it into the house, but itâs been a big day for them and Sam didnât want Dean overexerting himself just to try to prove himself as a big, bad, Alpha. Sam wonders if their son will inherit Deanâs stubbornness, heâd be a strong Alpha just like his daddy, Sam is sure of it. Dean lets out a grunt as he sits himself down on the couch in the living room, he hadnât said anything since leaving his PT, too afraid of what might slip out if he opens his mouth.
âIâm gonna start on dinner,â Sam says, stopping at the couch to place a kiss on Deanâs forehead, âIâm so proud of you Alpha, I know it was a lot today. But Iâm glad you were with me.â Dean doesnât do much more than nod his head. He canât keep doing this to Sam, he wished that he wouldâve just let him die in that barn. He didnât want to be saved. He was ready to go, heâd made peace with his fate, but Sam just couldnât let it happen.Â
Dean does his best to be pleasant, letting Sam ramble on about finishing the nursery, deciding on names, he nods occasionally, enough to make Sam feel like heâs listening, but all heâs really thinking about is all the things he wants to tell Sam, but to tell him would tip him off so he remains silent. After dinner Sam takes Miracle out for a walk, and Dean knows this is his opportunity. Making his way to his and Samâs shared room, though it was more his- his injuries making it nearly impossible for Sam to settle into the room, but his perfect Omega didnât complain, we have plenty of time to make it ours, he said. He stops at the nursery, pushing the door ajar.
Heâd made it a point to not go into the room. But he found himself wandering in, imagining what it could look like by the time the pup arrived. He could see a soft blue painted on the walls, heâs never been one for themes but feels a wallpaper covered in classic cars would fit perfectly. Dean could see Sam, sitting in a rocking chair holding their son in his arms, almost as if it were happening right in front of him. They deserved better than a broken Alpha.Â
Dean grabs the illegally obtained oxy out from its hiding spot. He always wondered if tonight would be the night where he would accidentally overdo it, but still he couldnât stop himself from swallowing the handful of pills. He would be, at the very least, high when Sam returned, and he was okay with that, even though another part of him hated that he was okay with being high more often than not these days. He lets the fog of the oxy warm his body, a haze blurring his vision as he collapses against the bed.
Sam shrugs off his jacket as he and Miracle enter the house, today was a good day, he thinks. According to Jesse, Dean is getting back to where he was before his setback a few months ago. PT always took all of Deanâs not just physical but mental energy for the rest of the day. He hopes that maybe by the time the pup is born Dean will only need to use a cane, and by his first birthday heâd be able to walk unassisted again. Sam walks down the hall to their bedroom, noticing the nurseryâs door open, âweird,â he thinks aloud. He finds Dean asleep in the bulky hospital bed, his personal goal was to rid their room of that monstrosity next, he makes a mental note to ask Deanâs doctor the next time theyâre there, and maybe he can finally nest properly in their home. Thereâs a king size bed sitting in the guest room, waiting to take its proper place in the master.
For now, the full size bed does fine, heâs able to reach over in the middle of the night and grab Deanâs hand, but all he wants is to be able to sleep in the same bed as his mate again. He tugs off his t-shirt and pulls on a pair of pajama bottoms before sliding into bed, and the sound of Miracle settling on the floor gives him the final bit of comfort he needs to let sleep consume him.Â
Sam wakes before Dean, not anything new, he has always been the early riser, but this morning thereâs a rattling that also grabs his attention. An orange prescription bottle sits on the edge of the bed. Sam doesnât think much of it at first, he knows that sometimes Dean takes an extra pill at night, usually after a particularly exhausting day, and the doctor okayed it, as long as it wasnât excessive. They were supposed to be weaning him off the oxy, using more PT to help with the pain. He grabs the bottle, wanting to put it back into its proper place in the kitchen, when something about the bottle catches his attention. Not only was the bottle not prescribed by Deanâs doctor, it was made out to James Hetfield. He doesnât know if he should confront Dean about the forgery, maybe he was afraid of running out before the next fill could be made. Only one bottle, while it would be needing to be addressed at some point, didnât set off any major alarms.
He decided it should go back into the bedside drawer, that was where he had seen Dean keep his medications before. He slides off the bed, and shuffles to Deanâs side, whoâs still sleeping soundly. He reaches for the drawer, and as he pulls it out, the rattling of more bottles fill the silence of the room. There are nearly a dozen pill bottles rolling around. There was no way that these were all his prescription bottles. This is a much bigger problem than Sam was expecting.
Dean wakes to a ray of sunlight streaming through the blinds into the bedroom, why they havenât hung blackout curtains yet, Deanâll never know. He rubs his hands down his face- he really needed to shave, Sam hasnât said anything, but he knows that heâs not feeling the ZZTop look on him. He felt good today, almost normal. Maybe he could join Sam on Miracleâs morning walk, though, for him the wheelchair would most likely be a requirement. He swings his legs off the bed, heâs sure that Sam is just as ready as he is to be rid of the clunky bed. He shuffles towards the hall and sharp pain radiates through himâ maybe it wasnât going to be as good of a day as he hoped. He takes a deep breath, and the pain dulls, heâll need his oxy and soon.
He hobbles toward the kitchen, Sam usually brings him his morning pills and breakfast, but he figures he'll give him a surprise and meet him in the kitchen so that they can eat together. He turns the corner into the kitchen and his heart drops into his stomach at the sight in front of him; pill bottles are sitting on the table and Sam sits at the end, his expression somewhere between pissed off and terrified. He doesnât know how to explain this to Sam.
Sam rubs the curve of his stomach, staring at the bottles, several were nearly empty, some hadnât even appeared to be touched, and not a single one was prescribed to Dean. Once he started looking, he found bottles hidden all over the house, there had to be over a yearâs supply, tens of thousands of dollars all in pill form. Dean clearly has a problem, and Sam curses himself for not noticing.
âI, uhââ Dean grunts as he steps over the threshold and into the kitchen. âI can explain.â
âOkay,â Sam scoffs, he canât wait to hear this. âExplain. Explain why there are nearly twenty bottles of Oxycodione on this table, better yet, explain why each one of them has a different name on them.â
He doesnât have any real explanation, and both he and Sam know it. Dean splutters, âI need them.â
âYou need them,â Sam repeats incredulously. âYouâre supposed to be getting off these by the end of the month Dean!â Dean plops down on the seat across from Sam, his eyes stay fixed on the table, unable to look his Omega mate in the eyes. âWe talked about this Dean, your doctor told you, you shouldâve been off these entirely weeks ago! I know you still have pains, and thatâs why I havenât pushed the subject, but Dean this isâ this is a problem. What were you planning on doing with all these?â
Dean doesnât say the words. He canât admit to what he thinks about doing all the time, and the pills are the only thing that make him numb and high enough to not do it.
âYou shouldâve let me go,â Dean murmurs, and Sam sinks back into his chair. âI told you to let me go in the barn. I was ready to go. I accepted it. But youâ you couldnât let me, and nowâ look at me Sam!â
âYouâre here, Dean, not because angels or demons intervened, but just doctors working tirelessly to put you back together.â
âAnd a lot of good itâs done!â Dean shouts, slamming his fists on the table, making a handful of bottles tip over. âWhat good am I to you, to our pup, like this?! I canât even be an alpha, I canât take care of either of you. If youâd let me go, you couldâve found another alpha, another mate. You deserve that, Sam, our pup deserves that.â
âI donât want another alpha, Dean! All I want is you. All Iâve ever wanted is you, and you asked me to let you die. I couldnât not do something, I had to try to get you help. Fuck you for being pissed off about that. You think this is how I imagined our lives would be now?â
âThen you shouldâve let me go!â
âI couldnât do it, Dean! And Iâm not gonna keep apologizing for it,â Sam shakes his head. âI would do it over and over and over again. You think youâre the only one whoâs tired, whoâs hurting, Dean? You donât think there are days where all I want to do is lay in bed all day and shut out the world? Youâre not the only going through shit, Dean. I tried so hard to reach out to you, but youâve been like a brick wall, you wonât let me help you, you wonât let me in. I thoughtâ I thought seeing the pup would snap you out of it, but all you did was stare off into nowhere,â a realization dawns on Sam, one Dean hoped heâd never make. âYou were high yesterday, werenât you?â he glares at him. âYouâre high now,â itâs not a question.
âI just need itâ I need it to function Sam.â
âYouâre NOT functioning Dean, and you can't even see it! You're a shell, Iâm going. I canâtâ I canât live like this. You wonât let me help you and Iâm not gonna watch you slowly kill yourself.â Dean doesnât notice the bag sitting at Samâs feet until he reaches for it. âCall me once youâve figured out what it's gonna beâ me and the pup or this,â he gestures to the bottle-covered table.
Samâs been gone for nearly a month. He texts every morning and night, giving Dean the small bit of solace that at least wherever he is, heâs doing okay. Itâs not that he didnât think he had a problem, he knew he did. But, the fear of the pain that he felt in his initial recovery scared him more than anything. He didnât want to be some dead-beat dad, too stoned to even know what was going on around him. Heâd spent his childhood hiding that side of John from Sam, and he promised himself then that he wouldnât be like that with his own kid. Here he is though, their pup isnât even in the world yet, and Dean is already letting him and Sam down.Â
He goes cold turkey and it sucks ass, he keeps telling himself that he has to do it, not only for Sam and the pup but for himself. Sam was right, he wasnât functioning, he was living his life in a fog, and he couldnât do it anymore. Itâs still difficult for him to get around, but when he does the PT that he shouldâve been doing all along, it becomes more bearable for him. He knows what Sam would say, heâd heard him saying hundreds of times over the last four months; youâre strong, Dean, a fighter, you canât let your fear of being weak stop you from asking for help or receiving it.
With each passing week one thing becomes abundantly clear to Dean: he canât do it without Sam. He needs his brother, his Omega, his mate just as much as Sam and their pup will need him. Heâs ready to beg and plead for Sam to come home, to show him just how much they mean to him. Sam answers the call on the first ring, and Dean can hear the wariness in his tone, but if thereâs one thing he canât resist, it's his Alpha demanding he come home.
Sam walks through the door unsure of what to expect from Dean, addicts will say anything to get what they want- he knows from his own experiences, but Dean sounded sincere, and when he asked him to come home he couldnât not obey his Alpha. The house is silent, save for a muffled thumping of music. Sam makes his way through the hall, calling out for Dean but with no answer, and stops at the nursery door, determining it to be the source of the music.
He opens the door easily, and finds Dean on the floor in the middle of the room, singing along to Metallica as he fiddles with a diaper genie. Sam takes in the room in awe. The walls are painted with soft green and blue stripes, the slight smell of the fumes indicating that it had to have been done within the last day or so. The crib, which when Sam left, was still in the box, was now set up in the corner of the room. A glider sits adjacent to it, and the changing table on the opposite wall. Clothes that were previously in bags haphazardly throughout the room were now sorted it appeared, and some are even hanging in the closet. A mountain of diaper boxes sits next to the changing table, which also has more packages of wipes than Sam thought was even possible. He could cry, in fact, before he can even stop it, tears stream down his cheeks.Â
ââMega,â Dean turns when he notices the change in the air. âSammy, whatâs wrong?â he says as crosses the room to wrap his arms around him. âIf you donât like it, we can change it,â Dean offers as pulls away briefly, âI just thoughtâŠâ
âItâs perfect, Alpha,â Sam shakes his head, letting out a small laugh. âWhenâ when did you do all this? How? You shouldnât be overexerting yourself!â
âItâs fine, âMega,â Dean rubs Samâs arms and leans forward to place a gentle kiss on his lips. Itâs their first real kiss in months, and with every passing second it becomes deeper and more passionate. Dean nips at Samâs bottom lip, and a groan leaves him.
âAlpha, please,â Sam begs, wrapping his arms around Dean. Itâs been too long since theyâve been together like this, and he can feel his hole slick at the thought of being together with him again. âI need you.â
Dean doesnât need more permission than that, he needs Sam just as much as Sam needs him, and he brings them both down to the carpeted floor. He doesnât know if he can make it last as long as he wants to- he and Sam hadnât fucked since before the night he almost died, and all he wants to do now is reclaim his Omega. Theyâre tearing each other's clothes off between kisses, Sam paws at Deanâs cock, already hard and ready to knot his needy mate.Â
âTurn around, âMega,â he commands gently, âhands and knees.â Sam lets out a whine, Dean knows what he wants, fuck he wants it too, he wants to look into Sammyâs eyes as he sinks into him for the first time in nearly six months, wants to watch as he comes undone on his cock, but he knows there will be plenty of time for that later. âI promise you Sammy, I will make you come over and over, but for now I need you to present for me, Omega.â
Sam obeys, propping himself up on his elbows and wiggles his ass in Deanâs direction. He tries reaching for his own cock, trying to relieve some of the need, but his growing belly makes it difficult. Sam lets out a shuttering groan when Dean licks up his seam and tongues his hole. He doesnât need Dean to get him ready, he can feel the slick already leaking out of him, but Dean doesnât stop, fucking his ass with vigor until Samâs on the verge of cumming untouched.
âDean, Alpha, please! I need your knot,â Sam begs, tears stinging his eyes. Dean doesnât need to be told twice, and as much as he loves watching Sammy become a needy cockslut, that isnât what he needs now. He lines himself up and pushes into Samâs tight, warm ass, and almost cums in an instant. Sam squeezes around him, and Dean curves himself around him, grabbing Samâs cock and jerking it in time with his thrusts. Neither of them are going to last long, they both know that.
âI love you so much, Sammy.â Dean grunts into Samâs ear, âyou are the perfect Omega, you were made for me. You look so fucking beautiful carrying my pup inside you. I canât wait until I can do it again and again. Iâll never let you down again, Sammy, you are my everything.â
âDean,â Samâs breathless, so close to the edge, âknot me, claim me, Alpha. I want everyone to know Iâm yours, that youâre mine. I love you.â
Deanâs knot swells, and heâs locked inside Sam as he bites down on his mating gland, coating Samâs walls with his cum. His orgasm triggers Samâs, and heâs spilling all over Deanâs hand as he works him through his orgasm. Dean doesnât stop, he licks the blood away from the bite and pulls Sam up so his chest is flush with Samâs back. âGimme another one Sammy, I know you can.â Dean grunts as he jerks Samâs cock with one hand and plays with Samâs nipple with the other, theyâre going to be locked like this for a while, and Dean knows he can coax at least one more orgasm out of him.
By the time the sun has set the brothers are no longer connected, but are wrapped in each other's arms as they count kicks from the growing pup. Sam is in a euphoric haze as Dean traces patterns on his swollen belly. The brotherâs had lost each other too many times over the years - but they were together now, and only a few things mattered to them: their baby boy who was going to be with them in only a matter of months and their renewed bond. As long as they had each other, everything would be okay.
Feedback is fuel! Please let me know what you think! Please consider a reblog so that this can reach more people on this hellsite.
Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x Female Reader
Word Count: 0.9k
A/N: Thatâs all folks! Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did.đđÂ
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ONE YEAR LATER
Dean and Y/N carried various potluck side dishes into the backyard, placing them on the long wooden table Dean had made in his spare time to accommodate his growing family.
John and Bobby were manning the grill, and Sam was playing with Miracle, the big goofball dog Dean had rescued from a burning building where his owners had sadly perished.
Jody and Mary sat at the table in the sunshine with Jess across from them, sheltering under the parasol with baby Matthew.
When the little boy saw Y/N, he gave her a big toothy smile. He wasnât even a year old yet and had the same Winchester charm his father, uncle and grandfather had. Y/N couldnât refuse the grabby hands and little mewls demanding she takes him from his motherâs arms and into hers.
âHey, buddy!â Y/N smiled as she lifted Matthew and placed him on her hip. Every day his baby babbles sounded more like actual words. Although she wasnât as versed in Matthewâs baby language as his parents were, she listened to him intently and responded whenever there was a break in his storytelling.
Todayâs gathering was a double celebration. Bobby was retiring as Fire Chief at Lawrence F.D. Dean had accepted the promotion into his role and would start as the new Chief at Firehouse 3 the following week. Y/N couldnât be prouder of her boyfriend and wouldnât deny that him not running head-first into fires ninety percent of the time would make her life much less stressful.
âHe always settles so easily with you,â Jess smiled, and Y/N glanced down to see Matthew had fallen asleep on her shoulder.
âWhat can I say? Kids love me,â Y/N said, giggling as Dean bent to kiss her forehead, a soft smile curving his lips upwards. The look of utter adoration that shone in his green eyes was overwhelming, and she felt her breath catch in her throat.
âAlright,â John called from the other side of the yard. âFirst batch of food is ready!â
âHere, let me take him so you can get something to eat. You must be starving after coming off a night shift and barely sleeping before entertaining all of us,â Jess said as she reached to take the sleeping baby from Y/Nâs arms.
âItâs fine, Jess. I can survive another twenty minutes. Go, eat something hot for a change without burning your mouth!â Y/N grinned as Jess gave her a grateful smile.
Once everyone had their fill of food and relaxed with some drinks, Y/N and Jody began clearing dishes and putting away the leftovers before promising to bring more beer and another bottle of wine from the kitchen when they were finished.
âYou look happy,â Jody smiled fondly.
âI am,â Y/N nodded, unable to hide her grin.
âIs he treating you right?â The older woman asked next.
âNot just right, Jody. He makes me feel safe and loved and wanted. I couldnât ask for anything more.â
âGood. Iâm happy for you, kiddo. You deserve all of it,â Jody hugged her tightly and added, âAnd if he puts a toe out of line, he is a dead man!â The women chuckled, and Jody pulled back slightly. âCome on, letâs get these drinks out there and join the celebrations.â
Jody placed a cooler filled with ice, beer and a bottle of wine onto the table, and Y/N gave out clean glasses and placed the corkscrew and bottle opener next to it. John and Sam passed out the drinks, and when no one was left empty-handed and had settled into conversation, Dean stood and gathered everyoneâs attention.
âAs Iâm sure you all know, Iâm not good with words and find it hard to talk about my feelings. Today, Iâm putting that aside to celebrate a great mentor, a great Chief, and an even greater man. Iâve been in Bobbyâs Firehouse since I was a cocky probie, and he quickly knocked that out of me completely! He taught me all I know, and thatâs why stepping into his shoes isnât as terrifying now as it was the first time Bobby told me that one day, Iâd be sitting in his seat.
âSo, cheers, Bobby! Thank you for having patience with me, for mentoring me and teaching me all I know, for seeing something in me that I couldnât, and for treating me like family. In and out of the Firehouse.â Dean said, and cries of cheers, congratulations and clinking glasses rang through the backyard. He cleared his throat, letting them know he wasnât finished yet.
âI know weâre here to celebrate Bobbyâs retirement and my promotion, but Iâm hoping we might have another reason to celebrate. Itâs times like this that I wish I could be more articulate and find the right words to talk about how I feel and the million things I really want to say⊠need to say. And I promise to try, but for now, the only words I have are the most important ones⊠Y/N,â Deanâs voice cracked as he got down on one knee before her and pulled out a little velvet box. âWill you marry me?â
Y/Nâs hand flew to her mouth in shock, and tears flooded her eyes. This was all sheâd ever wanted. All sheâd dreamed about. A second chance with the one that got away.
âYes!â she answered, a shriek of laughter coming straight after as Dean lifted her, held her in his strong embrace, and spun her around.
Summary: Jensen Ackles has spent his whole adult life in front of the camera, but now he wants something more. Something heâs not been able to find yet: an omega to settle down with. When Y/N Y/L/N arrived on the set of Supernatural, the alpha may just find all heâs ever wanted â his true mate.
Pairing: Alpha!Jensen Ackles x Female Omega!Reader
Rating: Teen
Bingo Square: Scent Bond for @jacklesversebingo
Warnings: Omegaverse, A/B/O dynamics (no smut or anatomy talk), fluff, scenting.
Word Count: 2.5k
A/N: This WIP has sat unfinished for over a year. When I got the âScent Bondâ bingo square for Jacklesverse, I just knew this would be the perfect fill and found my fluffy bone long enough to get this finished! I hope you love this absolute floof đ
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Jensen was irritable. That much was obvious from the Goddamn moon. In fact, irritable was too polite a word for what he was. His ruts were no joke since he hit forty, knowing that his biology dictated he shouldâve settled with a mate long before now. The problem was work always got in the way.
If it wasnât sixteen hour filming days, it was every other weekend at conventions. If it wasnât conventions, it was catching up on sleep; if it wasnât sleep, it was an awards show, corporate event, or some other function he was obligated by contract to attend.
Jared had been lucky in finding his true mate on set, and Jensen always hoped the same fate might come to him, but so far, twelve seasons into the show, it hadnât happened and his hope was starting to wain.
He couldnât deny that he wanted what all his family and friends had. He was lonelyânot that he liked to admit that out loud to many people. All that would achieve is a sudden string of blind dates that always ended in disaster.
The alarm on his phone went off with the reminder to buy a present for his nephewâs birthday, and when he registered the date, he frowned. Quickly, Jensen ran through the math in his head, and his frown deepened. He wasnât due a rut for another week.
Then why was he so on edge?
âMr. Ackles? They need you on set in five.â One of the PAs, Riley, he thinks, shouts through his trailer door.
âAlright, thanks,â Jensen calls back, trying to put it to the back of his mind for now. He had a job to do, and if Jensen was anything, he was a professional. He would never let personal issues bleed into his professional life.
Plus, they had a very important guest star for the next couple of months. Y/N Y/L/N had signed on for an eight-episode story arc, and everyone was excited. She was the most popular actress the network had ever had on their books. She was making waves in the acting world, and everyone knew it was only a matter of time before she moved to a bigger network or the big screen and began cashing in on prestigious award wins.
Not only that, but Jensen had a massive crush on the beautiful omega, and Dean would be having a really good time with her sassy, sexy character for the duration of her time here. He knew it was unlikely that sheâd be his true mate, but maybe, if he played his cards right, sheâd at least go on a date with him, and things might work out for them. Plenty of couples he knew werenât true mates and life was great for them.
âCan you smell that?â Y/N asked no one in particular in the hair and makeup trailer.
âSmell what?â Jared asked from the hair chair.
âLeather, andâŠâ she turned her head and sniffed again. âSandalwood. Mmm, whiskey.â She felt her cheeks heat up and a tingle in her belly that wasnât wholly unfamiliar to her; neither was the scent she was detecting. It smelled like home. âSpearmint, too?â
Jared smirked through the mirror at Frida, the hair lady, and Y/N caught the grin on the makeup lady, Tanyaâs, face. âWhat?â she asked. Tanya just shook her head, her grin getting wider.
âCome on, Tanya! Thereâs something youâre not telling me! What is it?â she whined and pouted playfully.
âJeez, donât give me that look!â Tanya laughed. âDamn it! Or those eyes!â she stepped away, laughing harder, when Y/N pulled out the big guns. âYou know, Jared, Y/Nâs puppy eyes are better than yours!â
Jared laughed and mumbled something that sounded a lot like: âJensenâs gonna be in so much trouble!â as he looked over at the confused omega, who was still subtly sniffing the air with an adorable frown on her face.
âIs it getting hotter in here?â Y/N suddenly exclaimed. âMy God, itâs hot,â she fanned herself with her script, feeling the heat rise from her toes upwards as if sheâd just sat in a tub filled with water that was too hot. âCan we open the door or something?â
âSure, I got it,â Frida said as she left Jared in the hair chair and opened the door to the trailer. âJensen!â she gasped as she opened the door and saw the green-eyed actor reaching for the handle. âYou scared me!â she giggled and stepped back, allowing the tall alpha to enter the trailer.
As soon as Jensen stepped inside, he stopped short, his green eyes blown wide and pupils dilating at the sight of his famous crush sitting in what was usually his makeup chair. She looked beautiful with her big doe eyes as wide as his and her hands fidgeting in her lap.
âOmega,â Jensen purred, momentarily shocked at how pathetic he sounded. Certainly not like the big, strong alpha he wanted to be for her, thatâs for sure.
âAlpha,â Y/N whimpered in response, bowing her head as a sign of her submission to him.
Jensen stepped out of his trailer and took a deep breath of fresh air, frowning at the scent he caught on the wind. It smelled like home. Like The Dallas Arboretum and Botanical Garden in the springtime, to be exact. Cherry blossom, lilac and honeysuckle all mixed in with a hint of lavender, making his mouth water. But that was impossible. Except for the lavender, those flowers only appeared in the spring or early summer. It was October.
He didnât think theyâd have flowers on set for any reason, but he supposed that didnât mean someone didnât get sent a bouquet or something. The smell of lilac was unmistakable to him; his mom had a huge lilac bush in her backyard, and heâd grown up with it. Heâd know that smell a mile off.
Shaking his head to rid himself of thoughts of home, he continued towards the set. He was really excited to work with Y/N, and he hoped she was as sweet and kind as heâd always heard she was. Nothing was worse than having professional respect for someone, meeting them, and finding their personality or attitude lacking.
Jensen spotted Rich across the lot and walked towards him to welcome him. The kind beta was directing again, and Jensen wanted to greet him properly and make sure he knew where to go if he needed anything. Not that Rich needed the reminder, but Jensen was nothing if he wasnât a gentleman.
âHey man, good to see you again,â Jensen said as he greeted Rich with a hug.
âLooking good, Jensen. How are you doing?â Rich asked.
âAh, you know,â Jensen said simply. Rich was one of the few people who knew how desperate he was to find a mate, settle down and have a few pups of his own instead of always being the fun uncle.
âSheâs out there, Jay. And I have a feeling sheâs closer than you think!â he smirked.
âHa!â Jensen scoffed. âYou sound like Jared! Heâs convinced Y/Nâll turn out to be my true mate!â he chuckled.
âHey, I get why he thinks that! I remember all those nights in your trailer or apartment, and if you saw her on screen, you just froze and stared at her until she was off camera again!â Rich laughed heartily.
âWell, sheâs incredibly beautiful. And Iâm no worse with her than when you see Scarlett Johansson or Jared was with Nina Dobrev!â Jensen laughed.
âTrue, but your eyes glaze over, and you get this stupid smile, andâŠâ Rich trailed off at his friendâs head tilt and look of sheer concentration.
âCan you smell that?â Jensen asked.
âSmell what?â Rich asked.
âItâs like a spring garden or something. I smelled it earlier and canât get it out ofââ Jensen whipped his head around and began stalking towards the hair and makeup trailer. Rich followed him, staying a safe distance behind the prowling alpha.
The alpha stopped in front of the trailer door and sniffed, purring low in his throat at finally finding its source. Just as he raised his hand to pull on the handle, the door whipped open, and his senses were assaulted with the most delicious and delicate scent heâd witnessed in his whole life.
Jensen stepped into the trailer, his gaze fixed on his celebrity crush, and felt the air being sucked from him as her Y/E/C eyes met his green ones, wide and submissive. âOmega,â Jensen purred, momentarily shocked at how pathetic he sounded. Certainly not like the big, strong alpha he wanted to be for her, thatâs for sure.
âAlpha,â Y/N whimpered in response, bowing her head as a sign of her submission to him.
âI think thatâs our cue to leave,â Jared grinned, raising his hands at the older alpha, showing he was no threat to them. The two women showed the same respect to Y/N, raising their hands as they left the trailer.
âI think Jay just found his true mate!â Jared grinned, pulling Rich into a hug.
âHeâs gonna absolutely hate that you were right. I hope you know that!â Rich smirked.
âHell yeah! And Iâm never gonna let him forget it!â
Rich chuckled as he pulled the walkie from his belt. âWe got a code 143; I repeat, a code 143 is in progress. All filming is suspended until further notice. Ladies and gentlemen, Jensen Ackles has met his true mate in none other than Y/N Y/L/N. Over and out,â Rich spoke through the device and smiled, high-fiving Jared when they heard the cheers erupt from all over the lot.
âAlright, Iâll start with the phone calls. Have you got the numbers for Y/Nâs family? Iâll let them know sheâll be off grid for a few days at least,â Jared asked Rich, who handed him a sheet of paper with her emergency contacts listed.
âIâll get some betas to keep the parameter clear from here back to his trailer. The last thing we need is another alpha getting too close to Y/N. Or an omega to Jensen, for that matter. Then I better call the Network and let them know their golden boy and girl are officially off the market!â Rich chuckled.
âTheyâre gonna love that!â Jared laughed.
Itâd been suggested to Jensen before by numerous executives that he and Y/N should meet and see if there was a spark, but Jensen was stubborn and said if they were meant to meet, itâd happen naturally. Apparently, so was Y/N. Theyâd heard a few times that it was the same response she gave them whenever they asked her about it.
Once the door was closed, Jensen stepped towards her and kneeled at her feet. âDo you want this, Y/N? Want me?â he asked shyly. Yes, they were true mates, but he had a few years on her, and she might not want to settle with an older man. She might not want to settle at all. Being in the prime of her career might mean she wasnât ready to start a family yet.
âYes, Jensen. I want this⊠want you, Alpha,â she purred, placing her hand on his cheek and smiling softly. The gasp of pained relief from the big, strong alpha broke her heart, and she wondered if heâd been let down as many times as she had in the past or if it was more.
âCan I⊠uh⊠can I scent you, Omega, please?â Jensen asked quietly, and Y/N giggled at his cuteness. Sheâd always hoped sheâd have an alpha with a softer side, and it seemed like she got one.
âYes, Alpha. Iâm yours now,â she said softly.
âNot quite,â his fingers rubbed softly over her mating gland. âBut I intend for you to be mine very soon,â he smiled softly before slowly leaning forward and nuzzling his nose into her neck. His hot breath against her sensitive skin made Y/N shiver, and her body erupted in goosebumps. The intimacy of the gesture was overwhelming, and she felt tears sting in her eyes.
Jensen whined as he got in closer and breathed her in. âYou smell so good, Omega. And so beautiful,â he whispered to her, gently placing his hand on the back of her neck and pulling her closer still. Y/N tilted her head and rested her cheek on his shoulder, nuzzling her nose into his mating gland, her neck still open, and began to scent him in return.
Within seconds, an overwhelming sense of tranquillity and contentment at being exactly where he needed to be rushed over him, and he had no idea if it was coming from him, her or both of them. And it was the most elating feeling in the world.
âSweetheart, I could sit her for hours and do this,â Jensen whispered, placing the softest of kisses on her neck between each word he spoke. âBut I wanna take you somewhere more private if youâll let me.â
âOkay,â Y/N answered, a whine escaping her throat as soon as he pulled away from her. Jensen chuckled at her pout, stood, held his hand out for her to take, and pulled her protectively into his side when she was on her feet.
âWhat hotel are you staying in?â Jensen asked.
âIâm not. Iâm staying with a friend. Her apartment is just outside the city,â Y/N responded.
âMy place is closer. Is that okay with you? Iâd rather we have complete privacy, but if it would make you feel better, we can go to my trailer or the place youâre staying,â Jensen spoke softly.
âLetâs go to your place, Alpha,â she beamed brightly, chuckling when Jensen purred in approval of her answer.
Stepping out of the trailer, Jensen pulled Y/N into his body and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. The omega responded instantly, winding her arm around his waist and moving as close to him as their bodies allowed. The alpha smirked and puffed his chest with pride at hearing the wolf whistles from the crew, whoâd gathered to wish the new couple well.
Jensen noticed his driver standing next to an SUV and headed straight towards him, determined to get them out of there as quickly as possible. Heâd waited long enough for her and didnât want to wait any longer.Â
Helping Y/N into the car, Jensen quickly moved to the other side and climbed in beside her. Heâd barely sat down when the omega slid over to his side and cosied up to him, burying her nose in his neck and scenting him contentedly. He purred, happy to finally have his omega in his arms, scenting her hair, allowing her aroma to mingle and settle in with his own, binding them together in a bond that would become unbreakable the instant he claimed her, which Jensen had every intention of doing before the sun came up.
âForever starts now, Omega. You ready for it?â Jensen murmured into Y/Nâs hair.
A/N: I didnât have a beta for this, so all mistakes are mine.
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âTry to get some rest,â Y/N smiled at her patient and exited the room, heading back to the main desk to see who was next on the list. In two sweet hours, sheâd finish her shift and finally get some proper time off.
Jessâ premature departure meant she and all of the nurses on her staff had banded together to cover more shifts than usual as they waited for a temporary replacement to start. It had been exhausting, and Y/N was surprised at how quickly sheâd fallen out of the habit of pulling a seventy hour week, but it was finally over. The new nurse had started yesterday, and normal shift service had resumed for her and her team.
There was another reason for her excitement: her date with Dean was in fourteen hours. Not that she was counting. Y/N had been disappointed they had to postpone their date last week, even more disappointed they couldnât fit it in last week. However, these things happened, and Dean had been right; absence made the heart grow fonder. Not that sheâd tell him that. He didnât need the extra ego boost.
âY/Nâ, Dr Ellen Harvelle said as she arrived at the check-in desk, ready to take another patient. âGot an emergency four minutes out. Someone from Firehouse 3 has been injured on a job. Normally I wouldnât ask, but everyone else is tied up.â
âIâm on it, Dr H,â Y/N replied, trying to push down the dread rising from her stomach. Throwing herself into action, she gowned up and ran to the ambulance bay. Please donât be Dean or Bobby. Please donât be Dean or Bobby. Was all that was running through the nurseâs head as she swallowed the bile rising in her throat.
Sirens blaring and lights flashing, the ambulance screeched to a stop in front of them, immediately followed by the firetruck. Her heart pounded painfully in her chest, but the second Dean and Bobby jumped from the engine, Y/N exhaled deeply and relaxed.
âYou good?â Ellen asked, and she nodded and jumped into action.
âWhat have we got?â Y/N asked, stepping up to the ambulance and waiting for the paramedicâs assessment.
âCastiel Novak, thirty-five, trapped by a falling beam from the ceiling of a burning building. He was found unconscious, breathing apparatus dislodged. Suspect the collapse of both lungs and damage to the airways from smoke inhalation. Compressions have been ongoing since he crashed about thirty seconds ago,â Jack spoke as he and Jo got the gurney out of the ambulance.
âAlright, Y/N, weâre gonna need to do a ride-along,â Ellen said.
âWhat can we do?â Bobby asked calmly, though his widened eyes showed his concern.
âWe need to keep compressions going. Jack, do everything Y/N tells you. Guys,â she directed to the firefighters surrounding her, âon my say, help me move him to trauma bay three. Y/N? Whenever youâre ready.â
Y/N climbed on the gurney and straddled Castielâs thighs. âAlright, Jack. On the count of three, pull away, and Iâll take over, okay?â she waited until Jack met her gaze and nodded his understanding before placing one hand on top of the other and clasping her fingers together.
âOne, two, three!â Seamlessly, Jack pulled his hands away, and Y/N replaced them with her own, not missing a beat as she began pumping Castielâs chest firmly.
âLetâs move!â Ellen ordered, and Dean and Benny stepped forward and pushed Castiel and Y/N into the hospital.
Having suffered a collapse of both lungs, a concussion, and damage to his respiratory system from smoke inhalation, Castiel was in a serious but stable condition. He was responding well to treatment, but the next twenty-four hours would be critical, and Y/N knew there would be a vigil of firefighters in the waiting room until he was out of the woods.
With her shift just about over, Y/N checked on Cas one last time and updated his chart before handing his care over to Kevin. She wanted to stay on and work a double, but when she spoke to Rowena about it, the red-head told her that sheâd reached her quota of hours for the week and reminded her sheâd already pulled two doubles this week and to go home before she fell down and she was the one lying in a hospital bed.
Closing her locker, Y/N threw her purse over her shoulder and let her hair loose from the uncomfortably tight and itchy bun it had been constricted for the past fifteen hours.
Making her way to the waiting room to give the firehouse her final update, she smiled slightly, seeing all the firefighters were no longer in their turnout gear. Jackets and helmets were no longer strewn all over the tables, chairs and floor. Y/N remembered from Pamela and Taylor that half of them wouldâve taken the truck back, changed their clothes, and brought food back for the others before they would go back and change out of their gear.
âY/N, whatâs the latest?â Uncle Bobby asked as he saw her standing in the doorway.
âHeâs responding well to treatment. His oxygen levels are coming up. Thereâs still a long way to go, but heâs definitely going in the right direction,â she responded.
âThank you for everything youâve done for him,â Uncle Bobby smiled and walked towards her. âIs your shift over, Princess?â
âYeah, I wanted to stay, but-â
âYou reached your quota again, didnât you?â Bobby chuckled.
âMaybeâŠâ Y/N grinned. âBut, there were extenuating circumstances this week which have been resolved.â
âSo, youâre telling me itâs not gonna become the norm for you to go above and beyond?â he smirked, his eyes twinkling as he teased her.
âI hope not,â Y/N smiled softly, her eyes falling on Dean, and Bobby grinned, hoping, just like his niece, that things would work out between the couple.
âYou should say goodbye to him before you go,â Bobby told her softly. Y/N nodded and stepped tentatively towards where Dean stood with Benny and Charlie.
âHey, sweetheart,â Dean smiled as she stepped beside him. âThanks for what you did for Cas.â
âItâs nothing, just doing my job,â she lowered her gaze shyly.
âModest much?â Charlie chuckled. âWhat you did was heroic!â
âOh no, thatâs not⊠I donât⊠You guys are the real heroes here,â Y/N shifted on her feet, uncomfortable with the attention.
âUh, can I talk to you? Outside?â Dean said, gently pushing her towards the door and she nodded gratefully at his timely rescue.
âThanks for getting me out of there, De,â she giggled as they stepped outside.
âWell, Charlie is right about the modest thing. Youâve never done well with attention or praise,â he chuckled softly. âSo, I hate to do this, but about tonight-â
âHey, itâs fine, Dean. Youâre where you need to be, and Cas is more important than our date,â Y/N said.
Dean smiled, grateful that she got it. Though he wouldnât say Cas was more important than her, he was a higher priority right now. âThanks for understanding, Princess. Iâll make it up to you.â
âYou better,â she grinned.
âCross my heart,â Dean smirked. âNow, your shift is over, Nurse Singer, and I think you should go home and sleep. You look dead on your feet.â
âYeah. I feel like I could sleep until Iâm back on shift!â Y/N chuckled.
âWell, if you donât pass out for four whole days,â Dean laughed. âCall me when youâve had some rest. Maybe we could rearrange our date?â
âIâd like that,â Y/N nodded and tried to suppress a yawn.
âGo home! Text me when you get there so I know youâre safe,â Dean said, kissing her forehead.
âAlright, Iâm going! Keep me updated on Cas, please?â she responded as she stepped backwards away from Dean.
âYou got it,â Dean smiled, watching her turn around and walk down the hallway.
âHey, Y/N!â he shouted, smirking when she turned around. âGood morning, beautiful.â
âGood night, handsome,â Y/N grinned back before turning and continuing down the hallway.
Y/N spent her first day off sleeping for three to four hours, eating, watching television, doing chores for three to four hours, and then going back to sleep. During one of her awake times, sheâd called Dean, and heâd happily let her know that Cas was officially âstableâ and out of the woods. Heâd be on his feet and heading home in no time.
Theyâd agreed to wait a few days before planning their date so Dean could be on hand to help Cas if he needed it. No doubt heâd be feeling the impact of the damage to his lungs and airways for a few weeks yet and would likely tire doing the most mundane of tasks.
Dean had apologised profusely and again promised to make it up to her, but Y/N convinced him there was no need, and she didnât mind waiting a little longer for him.
âAbsence makes the heart grow fonder, right?â sheâd teased him.
âSo they tell me,â Dean huffed lightly, suggesting just a hint of frustration.
âCome on, De. Weâve waited twelve years. Whatâs a few more days?â Y/N chuckled, trying to lighten his mood.
âYeah, I know. Doesnât mean I need to like it, Princess.â
âAww, are you missing me?â she teased again.
âYeah, I am,â he sighed, and Y/Nâs heart ached.
âWell, I know Cas will be taking up a lot of your time the next few days, but you know where I am if you wanna come over for dinner.â
âIf I can, I will, sweetheart,â he sighed again. âJust wish I could promise.â
âThen promise to give me the best second date ever,â she giggled.
âNow that I can promise,â Dean said, and Y/N could hear the grin in his voice.
âOh, I know you will!â Y/N giggled again, and Dean chuckled softly.
âI gotta go, Princess. Iâll call you later?â
Summary: As an Omega, Y/Nâs biology dictates that she needs to be claimed and have pups. Despite seeing her through her heats for years, Dean â the Alpha Y/N wants to settle down with â refuses to give her what she needs.
Pairing: Alpha!Dean Winchester x Female Omega!Reader
Rating: 18+ Only
Mini Series Warnings: tw: dub con (reader's head isn't in it), dub con claiming, omegaverse, A/B/O, A/B/O dynamics, ruts, heats, knotting, claiming, heavy angst, language, smut, smangst, p in v, dirty talk, breeding kink, claiming kink, rough sex, biting, oral sex (f rec), fingering, hair pulling, Dean is a bit of an asshole, fighting, canon level violence, arguments, feral Alpha, agitation, aggression, aftercare, fluff
Total Word Count: 11.8k
A/N: Please consider reblogging to spread this far and wide around this Hellsite or leave a little comment. It really does fuel our muse. If youâre too shy, or too cool for people to know you read fanfic and you donât want it showing on you blog, you can submit an anonymous ask or drop me a DM đ
Summary: Y/N decides to leave the bunker for good when Dean reiterates that he can never give her what she wants. Struggling to adjust without her, Dean turns to hormone suppressants, unable to stomach the thought of going through a rut with anyone else.
Pairing: Alpha!Dean Winchester x Female Omega!Reader
Rating: 18+ Only
Bingo Square: Hormone Suppressants for @j3bingo
Warnings: omegaverse, A/B/O, A/B/O dynamics, angst, arguments, heats, ruts, language, Deanâs still a bit of an asshole.
Word Count: 4.2k
A/N: The response to the first part of this angsty, angsty fic has been overwhelming. Thank you to every single one of you who read and commented and reblogged. It means so much đ„č Now, without further ado, I hope you love part two!
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Please consider reblogging to spread this far and wide around this Hellsite, or leave a little comment. It really does fuel our muse. If youâre too shy, or too cool for people to know you read fanfic and you donât want it showing on your blog, you can submit an anonymous ask or drop me a DMÂ đ
Being back in the bunker is suffocating, and you havenât even been back twelve hours yet. The mild cramps in your stomach are now an annoying and constant discomfort, and being near Dean is only making it worse. Your body is so used to the green-eyed hunter that his scent has you craving him. If you donât get out of here and find another alpha, you know youâll cave and go to the man who keeps breaking your heart.
Digging into the depths of your meagre closet, you pull out one of the few dresses you have and get ready to have a night on the town. Itâs nerve-wracking; you havenât done this in a long time, but you need to kick old habits and rid yourself of your addiction to Dean. Itâs no longer a healthy relationshipâmaybe it never had beenâbut your last time together opened your eyes and proved that he doesnât see you as anything other than a fuck toy.
Walking through the hallways of the bunker, your heels click loudly on the cold, concrete floors as you head towards the library. You know at least one of the boys will be there, and you pray to Chuck itâs Sam. Youâd skip this part entirely, given itâs none of their business, but as an unmated omega going to find someone to satisfy a heat, itâs probably best that someone knows your intentions.
As you turn the corner into the room, the scent of Deanâs agitation slaps you in the face. If youâre not careful and canât control your emotions, itâll end in a fight and a tumble in the sheets, and thatâs really the last thing you need.
âWhere are you going dressed like that?â Dean asks as soon as he sets eyes on you.
âOut,â you respond.
âYouâre in heat, Omega,â Dean growls.
âIâm aware,â you can feel your body warm as his gaze on you intensifies.
âDo you think itâs wise to go out in your condition?â Dean questions, and you fight your biological instinct to shrink in on yourself and submit to him.Â
âI need to find an alpha whoâll help me through this, so yes, I do think itâs wise.â
âYou have me, Y/N.â Deanâs tone softens, and the hurt that flashes in his eyes almost makes you run to him.
âNo, I donât. Not anymore.â You donât wait for his response, walking out of the library and up the stairs because youâre so close to saying screw it and making him take you right there in the library.
âIâll be back in a few days,â you call out and shut the bunker door behind you.
You know you wonât find what youâre looking for in the bar a few towns over, but at least youâll find someone who can scratch your current itch and make you forget about Dean fucking Winchester.
At least for a few days.
DEANâS POV
Dean feels his heart shatter as he watches Y/N walk out the door. This isnât how he wanted things to go with her. He wanted to talk to her and apologise for his behaviour during his last rut. At least if heâd done that, there was a chance they could still have some kind of relationship.
What they had is gone. He knows that. Heâs hurt her too much. If heâd dealt with things differently, theyâd still have had the potential to at least be civil to one another, but his gutâs telling him that the opportunity for civility has gone.
He canât blame himself entirely; she hasnât let herself be alone with him since heâd realised how much of an asshole heâd been to her. Dean had expected her to come to him last night when the scent of her heat became stronger and carried through the bunker, but sheâd remained shut in her bedroom. He isnât even sure sheâd eaten since yesterday morning.
âHey,â Sam says as he sits beside his brother and hands him a beer. âI heard you and Y/N talking. You alright?â
âNo, Sammy, Iâm not. You know, it never once occurred to me that what Y/N and I had could end?â
âIt doesnât have to,â Sam says softly, noticing tears in Deanâs eyes.
âYeah, it does. I canât give her what she wantsââ
âCanât or wonât?â Sam interrupts, and Deanâs heart pangs at the implication heâs being his usual stubborn ass alpha self.
âI canât, Sam.â Dean didnât usually show his vulnerabilities to Sam. Heâs the pack leader and canât afford to show weakness. The only person heâs ever shown vulnerability to is Y/N.
âWhy?â Samâs question is simple, but the weight of the answer is something Deanâs not sure heâs ready to admit out loud.
âItâs complicated,â Dean answers and takes a long swig of beer, drinking half the bottle in two swallows.
âEnlighten me, Dean, because from where Iâm standing, itâs not complicated at all. You already have an emotional bond with her. Youâve been mating with her for what, six or seven years? Why is it so hard for you to claim her, have that deeper chemical bond, and make you both happy by having a couple of pups? Itâd be nice to have some little ones running around here.â
âBecause the second I claim her, she has a target on her back. Sheâll become the hunted. Every monster on the continent will want to tear her apart to get to me. And thatâs something I wonât survive.â
âSo you do want to claim her?â Sam confirms, a small smile pulling at his lips.
âOf course I do!â Deanâs voice booms across the library. âI love her. More than anything. I always have, but I would rather die than put her in danger because of me and who I am,â Dean canât keep his turmoil to himself anymore. Now itâs out in the open with Sam, he canât shut the hell up. âI have thought of every way possible to give her what she wants⊠for years. Give us what we want, but in every scenario, she ends up dead, and I end up alone.â
âDean, if you keep going the way you have been, sheâll die, and youâll be alone anyway. And if you let her walk out of here and into the arms of another alpha, youâll still be alone.â
âI know that, Sam! But Iâd rather spend the rest of my life alone and know she was safe and happy with another alpha and a few pups than put a target on her back by claiming her! What part of that donât you understand?â
âYou think Y/N would be happy with another alpha? You think she wanted to go out hunting for someone else to fuck her through her heat? You think sheâs not wishing it was you? You think she doesnât love you? Because she does, Dean! Itâs clear to everyone!â Samâs frustrations reach boiling point, and he no longer has the patience to hold back. âThat curse she saved me from loosely translated to stealing what your brother has broken and making it yours. If she hadnât got between me and that witch, and Iâd been hit by that curse, Iâd have claimed Y/N for myself because youâre too chicken shit to do it. You know what that means, right? That even the witch knew you were in some kind of relationship. Even just being associated with you in the way she is makes her a target. And sheâs an even bigger one without a claim.â
âThen maybe itâs for the best that sheâs out there trying to find someone to take care of her,â Dean said, raising his eyebrows at Samâs exasperation.
âNo, Dean! It means that, claimed or not, monsters know what Y/N is to you and you to her. It means sheâs already a target, and youâve been protecting her from the monsters for a long time. Claiming her and having pups with her isnât going to change that.â
âLook, can we just drop this? Y/N is better off without me, okay? And nothing you say will change my mind. She deserves something good, and Iâm not good.âÂ
Pushing his chair back, Dean stands from the table and enters the kitchen. He grabs a bottle of Scotch from the cabinet and locks himself in his bedroom to lick his wounds.
It may not be the healthiest way to deal with things, but at least getting blind drunk on whiskey will stop the images of Y/N presenting for another alpha or taking anotherâs knot from playing like a video in his mind.
FIVE DAYS LATER
Y/NâS POV
âYouâre alive, then,â Deanâs voice greets you as soon as you step into the bunker.
âI am,â you respond, warily making your way down the stairs. Youâre on high alert, knowing this could turn volatile very quickly.
âYou alright?â he asks next, his eyes scanning your body for signs of injury. His gaze lingers on your neck, and when he notices it remains unblemished, he releases a breath, and his shoulders relax slightly.
âIâm fine.â It feels like you cheated on Dean, and it makes you feel so sick you want to cry.
âGood. Iâm glad youâre okay. I mean, you couldâve called. Let us know you were fine. It wouldâve stopped Sam and me from worrying about you every second of the day. For all we knew, you were lying in a ditch somewhere.â
âMy phoneâs GPS was stillâŠâ you pause and sigh, knowing you donât need to explain anything to him. âLook, can we not do this, please?â You plead. Itâs been a rough few days, and you just want to shower and sleep.
You stop next to him, waiting for him to let you pass and frown when he rears back with a snarl.Â
âGo shower, Omega. The stench of sex and Alpha makes me want to vomit,â Dean growls and walks away, leaving you standing at the entrance to the library, no longer able to keep the tears in.
The decision to leave is one of the hardest youâve ever had to make. The bunker is your home, too. Still, you know youâre no longer welcome. Dean doesnât want you, and youâve hurt each other beyond repair. You couldâve tried to sort this mess out. You couldâve done that rather than look for a heat buddy, but had you not gone out, youâd have fallen straight back into bad habits and Deanâs bed. You had to break ties with him completely, and the only way to do that was to sleep with someone else, even if it broke both your hearts in the process.
Between the anxiety from you and Deanâs argument after the witch hunt and your heat, youâve barely eaten for the past week. Before you leave for good, you head to the kitchen to grab something quickly, knowing itâs late enough that both Winchesters will be in their bedrooms, and you can eat and leave undetected.
âSneaking out on us, huh? Thatâs mature,â Dean scoffs, and you jump, startled by his voice coming from somewhere in the dark kitchen.
âAny particular reason youâre sitting in the pitch black, Dean?â you ask, your hackles raised and ready to flee if needed.
âAnswer my question first, then maybe Iâll answer yours.â
âCome on, Dean. We both know itâs not a good idea for me to stay here,â you reason.
âBut this is your home,â Dean says, and where before you only heard contempt, you can now detect hurt.
âNot anymore.â You turn to leave, deciding to just forget about food so you can get the hell out of here.
âPlease donât walk away from me, Omega.â
âI told you Iâm not your Omega, Dean. Youâve made that abundantly clear over the years.â
âY/N, please, sweetheart,â he begs, and you turn to face him, your anger rising.
âNo, Dean. I canât do this with you anymore. We canât keep doing this same dance over and over again. I want more. I needââ Your voice catches in your throat, and you swallow down the emotion that wants to spill from you. âI need to be claimed. I need to have pups. Itâs in my biology, Dean, and I canât change that. And I canât change the fact that if I donât settle down soon, Iâll go feral and die.â
âAnd youâre gonna do that with the asshat from the bar?â Dean spits back at you.
âNo! I want to do it with you, but you donât want me!â The tears spring from your eyes, and once again, you will Chuck, or whatever fucking angel is standing in his stead, to give you the strength you need to finally leave. To break this toxic bond thatâs been forged under false pretences for years.
âY/N, I do want you. I just canât give you what you need,â Dean pleads.
âYou can,â you nod with a tearful smile. âBecause even if it wasnât in the traditional way, you gave me what I needed for years. You just donât want to.â
âNo, Omega, please.â
âGoodbye, Dean.â
DEANâS POV
Y/N has been gone for two months, and there hasnât been a peep from her. If Sam has heard anything, heâs kept it quiet, and Dean hasnât asked. Sheâs turned off the GPS on her phone and removed the tracker from her car, and anyone heâs asked in their network either hasnât seen or heard from her or has just told him sheâs fine.
He misses her laugh and her smile. He misses her comforting scent that would linger around the bunker. He misses her soft, warm body sliding into bed next to him when sheâd had a nightmare or wanted to cuddle in those first few hours of her heat before her need for him changed to something more carnal.
Yet, never once did he reach out to her. Sheâd made it pretty clear they were done, and heâs accepted that. What he did to her was unforgivable. Still, heâs hurting, too and feels betrayed by what she did. He may not have the right, but itâs how he feels, and try as he might, he canât change it.
As the telltale signs of his next rut make themselves known, Dean knows this will be the hardest challenge heâs faced since Y/N left, but if she could so easily toss him aside and find someone else to mate with, so could he.
Standing at the bar, Dean preens under the attention of several omegas surrounding him. Itâs been a long time since heâs had so many women fawn over him, and he guesses that being with Y/N has kept them at bay all these years.
Looking towards the other end of the bar, he does a double-take. The woman has similar features to Y/N: same eye colour, same shaped face, and from what he can see, a similar figure. Itâs not her, but Dean is on his feet and making his way over to her before he can think twice about it.
âHey, sweetheart,â Dean gives the woman his most charming smile and feels his confidence soar as she giggles and looks down briefly before raising her eyes and batting her lashes at him. âThe nameâs Dean.â
âCarly,â she responds shyly, and Dean smirks.
âPretty name. It suits you, Omega. Can I buy you a drink?â he drawls, using his alpha tone.
âSure, Alpha,â she smiles sweetly, batting her eyes at him once more, and Dean knows heâs found a rut partner for the next few days.
âSo, whatâs your poison?â Dean asks, grabbing the bartenderâs attention.
âAppletini,â Carly says, and Dean fights a scoff at the girly concoction. Y/N wouldâve ordered a whiskey or an Old Fashioned if the mood struck her, none of this fruity shit that makes you question whether thereâs even any alcohol in it.
âWhiskey, neat, and an appletini for the lady,â Dean says to the bartender.
âSo, Dean, whatâs a handsome alpha like you doing in a place like this?â Carly asks.
Glancing at her kind eyes that remind him so much of Y/Nâs, he finds himself spilling everything to her. Heâs not sure why he finds it easier to talk to a stranger than his own brother or even Cas, but he does.
âLook,â Dean says after an hour of talking and a few more whiskeys. âI came here intending to find an omega to ride out my rut with, but I donât think thatâs such a good idea,â he confesses. âIâm not even sure I could⊠physically⊠uh, you know.â he chuckles.
âI think thatâs a wise decision, Dean,â Carly smiles kindly. âI donât think youâre in the right frame of mind to be mating with someone new. You havenât fully accepted that your mate left you, and it could be dangerous for both of us if we leave here together.â
âI wouldnât say sheâs my mate. I never claimed her, soâŠâ Dean shrugs, feeling a little bad for leading her on.
âDoesnât matter, Dean. You bonded with her intimately, and Iâm guessing you stayed faithful and only had her the entire time, right?â
âI only ever wanted her,â Dean nods and swallows another whiskey.
âSo, you were together like a beta couple would be, right? Like dating but not married?â Carly replies with a knowing smile, and Dean has to admit heâs never looked at his relationship with Y/N in that way before.
âI suppose we were,â he responds with a nod to the bartender for another drink.
âDo you know where she is? Can you go to her?â Carly asks.
âNo,â Dean sighs. âWe have some mutual friends, but they are very quiet about her whereabouts. Donât get me wrong, I get it. I hurt her. A lot. And I wish Iâd handled things differently.â
âYouâll get there, Dean,â she smiles. âAnd if you donât, try begging your friends to tell you where she is and grovel until she forgives you!â Carly chuckles and squeezes his hand. âIt could be an easy fix if you can overcome your fears. Itâs clear you love her, and if you can give into those feelings, youâll work it out.â
Carly hops off the barstool and pulls her purse strap over her shoulder. âGoodbye, Dean. I hope you find your girl and make things right,â she cups his cheek and winks at him before walking away and leaving him alone.
Downing the whiskey in one, Dean throws some bills on the bar and heads to the Impala. If heâs going to see himself through his rut, heâd need a lot of provisions.
It took six days, three bottles of lube, and the help of various knotting toys for Dean to come through the other side of his rut. He canât remember the last time one had been so brutal or unforgiving. However, now heâs out and can start taking the suppressants he got from the drugstore, so he doesnât need to go through one again.
âHey, you alright?â Sam asks, seeing Dean at the hob, frying bacon and eggs.
âStill feeling rough, but some food and fresh air should do me good. Please tell me you found a hunt while I was out.â
âYeah, looks like thereâs a ghoul loose in Stillwater, Oklahoma.â
âAlright, then. Weâll get everything together and leave in a couple of hours.â
âDean, are you sure youâre up for this? You still look a little⊠off.â
âIâm fine, Sammy. Just ready to get out of here. Been cooped up too long.â
For the next few months, thatâs what they do; move from small town to small town, saving people and hunting things, and Dean? Well, heâs just peachy.
FOUR MONTHS LATER
Dean always knew the suppressants would take some getting used to. Theyâre the drug store variety and werenât for long-term use. Still, the nausea and headaches are getting worse and are now accompanied by bouts of fever and a loss of appetite.
He knows his age probably isnât helping, and the fact heâs been rejected by his mate in a roundabout way, so rejection sickness has been on his mind the past few days as his symptoms got worse.
Samâs said heâs easier to anger than usual too, and Deanâs starting to feel constantly on edge now. He can only hope whatever this is will end soon because this fucking sucks.
Swallowing down another pill, Dean throws the pill bottle into his duffle so that he and Sam can get home, put this vampire hunt behind them, and take some time off.
Although sceptical at first, heâs now grateful heâd agreed to take a break from hunting for a couple of weeks to recoup and relax. They hadnât stopped hunting in close to twelve weeks, and he feels awful. A little time off might be just what he needs.
âReady to go, Dean?â Sam asks, frowning when he notices the pill bottle at the top of his brotherâs bag. The younger Winchester walks over and picks it up, huffing loudly. âThis is what youâve been taking? Over the counter suppressants?â
âYeah, so?â Dean replies.
âDean, these arenât for long-term use. Theyâre supposed to only delay a rut for a couple of weeks, not for taking every day. Why didnât you go to a doctor and get the right thing?â
âOh, because we have that luxury, Sammy!â Dean snaps. ââDo you have insurance? No. Whatâs your address? An underground fortress in the middle of fucking nowhere.â Seriously, you donât see anything wrong with that? And they say youâre the smart one!â Dean scoffs and shakes his head.
âWe wouldâve found a way, Dean. We always do. These are probably doing more harm than good. I think itâs why youâre feeling off, and itâs only going to get worse.â
âIt canât get any worse, Sammy! Y/N left me. Nothing will ever be worse than that!â Dean yells as he grabs his bag and stalks out of the motel room, and slams the door.
Dean is agitated. So much so that even he canât deny it. And the more he tries not to be, the worse he gets. He knows itâs annoying Samâitâs annoying him, tooâbut itâs not something he has any control over. Everything is going haywire; his skin itches, sweat drips down his back, and he just wants to pick fights. Thatâs why he had a go at the idiot at the gas station and the douchebag from the diner. He blames Sam for that one. He wanted to keep driving, but Sammy just had to stretch his freakishly long fucking legs now, didnât he?
When Sam finally rejoins him in the car, Dean tries to avoid his baby brotherâs puppy eyes. He knows heâs fucked up. He knows he shouldâve found a way to get the real thing, but the fear of a doctor telling him heâs a lost cause, that because his mate left him would mean that suppressants canât fix him stopped him. Besides, it canât take the ache of Y/Nâs departure away. It doesnât change the fact that as an alpha, it was his duty to claim her.
âWhat am I in for, Sammy?â Dean finally asks, breaking his silence on his suppressant use. Heâs not sure he wants to know, but he needs to keep whatâs left of his pack safe. If this ends the way he dreads, he needs to put a plan in place.
âYouâll go into a rut that can only be satisfied by uhm⊠your mate,â Sam says, avoiding her name so it doesn't set the older alpha off again. âAnd because sheâs not here, youâll go feral,â Sam sighs.
âAnd when I go feral, Iâll be dangerous to any omega who isnât Y/N,â Dean finishes what Sam doesnât say.
âI think itâs already started. I can smell your rut pheromones, but theyâre⊠off.â Sam said.
âListen to me, Sammy. Iâm going to the safe house in Montana. Iâll let nature take its course. You will leave me there and take the Impala so I canât get out.â Dean begins, but Samâs quick to intervene.
âDean, no. I can track down Y/N. When she hears whatâs happening, sheâllââ
âLaugh and tell you to tell me to go fuck myself! I made my bed, Sammy. I gotta lie in it.â
âYouâre signing your own death warrant!â
âThen so be it!â Dean roars, but Sam wonât back down.
âI canât let you do that when someone can help you!â
âShe wonât come because she doesnât want me, Sam!â Dean yells. âHow many times do I have to say it? She left me because I couldnât give her what she wanted. For all we know, another alpha has already claimed her.â
âI have to try, Dean! I canât just let you die!â Sam is trying to stay calm, not wanting to upset his brother more.
âYeah? Well, maybe itâs what I deserve.â
âItâs not, and you know it. Iâll lock you in that cabin and take the car with me to keep you safe, but I will find Y/N.â
âFine. I canât stop you,â Dean relents. âBut when she tells you sheâs done with me, you will leave me there, and whatever happens, happens. Deal?â
I opened this up to read so fast that I forgot I was in a work call. And now I feel like Dean, all itchy under my skin and bothered that I gotta wait another week. I just hope Iâll be home by that point and can read it right away. Otherwise itâll be a long drive home from the airport. đ
Summary: As an Omega, Y/Nâs biology dictates that she needs to be claimed and have pups. Despite seeing her through her heats for years, Dean â the Alpha Y/N wants to settle down with â refuses to give her what she needs.
Pairing: Alpha!Dean Winchester x Female Omega!Reader
Rating: 18+ Only
Bingo Square: The quote: âDonât try to alpha me. It wonât work.â for @j3bingo which is highlighted in bold.
Warnings: omegaverse, A/B/O, A/B/O dynamics, language, ruts, heats, smut (well⊠technically, itâs smangst and could be perceived as tw: dub-con), p in v, dirty talk, breeding kink, claiming kink, knotting, angst, Dean is a bit of an asshole, fighting, canon level violence, arguments.
Word Count: 3.5k
A/N: Well, we get straight into the filth under the cut with this one! I hope youâre ready for some angst alpha Dean! Buckle up, buttercups, and enjoy the ride! Please consider reblogging to spread this far and wide around this Hellsite, or leave a little comment. It really does fuel our muse. If youâre too shy, or too cool for people to know you read fanfic and you donât want it showing on your blog, you can submit an anonymous ask or drop me a DM đ
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âFuck, Omega, youâre dripping all over my cock,â Dean growls as he slams into you again. This is the eighth fucking heâs given you in the past three days, and itâs sure to be over a dozen by the time his rut is over.
You and Dean have been doing this for years. Whenever heâs in a rut, you get him through it, and whenever youâre in heat, heâs repaid the favour. At first, it was easy; a means to an end. You knew each other, you trusted each other, there was an attraction between you, and it was less risky than disappearing off the face of the earth for five days with a stranger, especially when any alpha could claim you with or without your consent.
As time passed, youâd done what you promised never to do; you caught feelings. Once that happened, becoming emotionally bonded to Dean was no longer a choice, and in all ways but wearing his mark, you and the green-eyed hunter had mated.
âSuch a sweet fucking pussy, baby girl. Canât get enough of it,â Deanâs voice had deepened with his arousal, and you knew the alpha in him was slowly taking over.
You groan at his words. Heâs always good with dirty talk and can turn you into a weak, whimpering mess with a single word.
âMine.â
But itâs all talk. Dean has told you plenty of times that you could never be anything more. And the more years that passed, the harder thatâs been to accept. Every month when your heat ended, you swore it was the last time. Your biology dictated your life, and if an alpha didnât claim you and give you pups, youâd go feral and die.
Deanâs knot is beginning to swell; you canât feel him as deep as he had been. He drapes himself over your sweat-slicked back to give himself better purchase to push and shove into you, desperate to get as deep as heâd been a few minutes ago. Itâs a futile effort as he wonât get what he wants until his knot has slipped inside you, but being surrounded by him â his weight on top of you, breathing in his scent â is a euphoria you could never get enough of. Itâs the reason youâve always ended up under him.
âAlpha, please,â you beg pathetically. âNeed your knot.â
âYeah? You gonna be a good girl and take my knot, âmega?â Dean grunts in your ear, his knot beginning to catch at your entrance.
âYes, Alpha!â You gasp as Deanâs hand wraps around your throat, pushing your head to the side and exposing your neck.
âOf course, you are, âmega. Always such a good girl for your Alpha,â Dean grunts, thrusting harder and harder, trying to force his knot inside your walls, but he canât quite slip it into your tight, slightly tense channel.Â
âGonna fill you up so good, baby girl. Knot you and fill you. You want that, huh? Want my come? My pups? Want me to ruin this pretty little neck with my mark?â he grunts, teasing your delicate skin with his teeth.
You moan, feeling another bout of slick leaking from you at his words. Itâs all you want, and you choke back the tears at the regret you feel about ever starting this vicious cycle; at the cruelness of him using what you so desperately want to loosen you up enough to take what he wants.
And you hate yourself because it works.
âYeah, I know you do, Omega. You just gotta let me in. Let me in, and Iâll fill you so good, baby. Thereâs no way you wonât come out of this pregnant.â You try to remind yourself that itâs only words, and youâre on birth control anyway, so itâll never happen, but you canât help but wish there was truth in them.Â
Dean lowers his head, and you shiver when his tongue licks over your mating gland and his teeth nip at your skin.
âAlpha!â You scream, finally reaching orgasm as his knot breeches you and locks your bodies together for the foreseeable future.
âThatâs mâgirl,â Dean growls as he grinds into you, the tip of his member kissing your cervix. He jerks his hips, shoving impossibly further inside you, and you whine at the pleasurable pain.
âNo fucking pussy better than yours, âmega, and itâs all fucking mine,â Dean roars and you feel the heat of the first ropes of come hitting your quivering walls, sending you into a second orgasm.
Your elbows can no longer hold your weight, and you collapse onto the bed. You hate how Dean knows what buttons to push to get you to give him what he needs. You hate your body for falling for his words. And right now, as you experience a third orgasm that has you fighting between euphoria and disgust, youâre glad Dean hasnât claimed you, and a chemical bond is non-existent, so he canât feel the torment youâre currently going through.
You sigh as the waves of your climax roll away, and your body melts into the mattress. Behind you, Dean moans low and long as your relaxed body allows his knot to slip in deeper, and he empties everything he has into your womb.
Dean has never come so hard with you before, and you wonder if the claiming and breeding talk did it, or if it was because heâs never been so deep inside you before. Or if he, like you, is finding it harder to fight his instincts.
He carefully rolls you both onto your sides and wraps himself around you protectively, placing soft kisses across your back and shoulder. Itâs the first sign that his rut is ending, and it doesnât surprise you that itâs a day early, given how much of his come you can feel swirling in your belly.
The afterglow youâd been basking in is quickly overshadowed with dread because you know this is the last time this would happen. You canât keep doing this to yourself. Dean will never want more with you than what you have right now. Heâll never reciprocate your feelings for him, and you refuse to put yourself through it any longer.
âYou okay, Y/N? Was I too rough?â Dean asks, pressing his lips to your spine, and you know for sure heâs out of his rut because he called you by name and not âOmegaâ or âBaby Girlâ. And if using your name hadnât given it away, then his concern for you would have.
âNo,â you say quietly. You try to shift away from him, yelping from still being locked together tightly and stretched to almost unbearable pain. You want to cry, knowing youâll likely remain that way for over an hour. At one time, that wouldâve made you the happiest little omega on the planet, being tucked safely in your alphaâs arms, him locked in you so tightly, but right now, you just want to get away from him.
âEasy, sweetheart,â Dean soothes, running his hand up and down your side. âWeâre gonna be here a while. It hasnât been like that since my first rut, and Iâm jammed in there pretty tight,â Dean chuckles. âFuck, that felt good!â
You remain still and silent, not wanting to cause yourself any further pain, and grateful that if the tears youâre holding fall, you can blame it on the discomfort you feel.
âUh, you know all that talk about claiming and pups was just that, right? Dirty talk?â Dean speaks, breaking the silence that had formed between you. âBecause this life ainât the place for weaknesses like mating bonds and pups.â
âI know.â It comes out in a whisper, but at least you didnât burst into tears at the final nail in the coffin of your relationship with Dean.
âGood,â he states, pulling you further into his body and settling down to sleep.
Now all you need to do is wait until Deanâs knot deflates and heâs sleeping deeply. Then you can shower the stench of the alpha from your body and return to your room. Your space. Your haven. Your nest.
ONE MONTH LATER
The trouble with witches is that theyâre more intelligent than most people give them credit for. And vindictive. Theyâre also the most vile monsters on the planet. Still, you canât help but admire them. Not that youâd ever admit that out loud, but you canât deny the genius of the one youâre hunting right now thatâs had the three of you running around in five different states trying to catch her.
When your luck finally turns, and you find her hideout undetectedâa hundred miles from the bunker, no lessâthe three of you get takeout and beer in the motel room, and form a plan to take the bitch down.
As the sun comes through the threadbare drapes, rousing you from the first restful nightâs sleep youâve had in weeks, you still feel tired and too hot. Trying to kick the duvet off your overheated body, you feel a solid block behind you and sigh. Sam and Dean had insisted you all share a room, knowing youâre all on the witchâs hit list and are safer in numbers until sheâs dead, so you know it can only be Dean behind you.
Becoming more awake, you notice Dean nuzzling into your neck, his lips resting on your mating gland, and his calming, intoxicating scent surrounding you. This is the closest youâve been to him since his rut a few weeks ago, making your stomach lurch.
Quietly slipping from the bed, you smile wistfully as the green-eyed alpha whines at your sudden absence. Dean has been looking at you strangely these past two weeks. You know that he knows youâre pulling away from him, but as always with the two of you, itâs gone unspoken. Dean never talks about his feelings, and the last time you did, well, letâs just say thatâs when you knew you and Dean were a sinking ship.
Grabbing underwear, jeans, a vest top, and flannel from your duffel bag, you make your way into the bathroom, wanting for once to have a long, hot shower without it turning cold when soap suds are still in your hair because the boys have used it all up.
Fully dressed and towelling your hair, the first signs of this monthâs heat make themselves known as your skin prickles and the twinges start in your lower belly. This will be the first heat youâve endured without Dean in a long time, and you pray to Chuck or whoever the fuck is running things upstairs now, that youâre strong enough to handle it.
Taking two Tylenol for the impending cramps, and a suppressant to try to ease the other symptoms of heat, you brush the tangles from your wet hair and head over to the diner to get breakfast for yourself and the two alphas, the younger whose bed is now empty having gone out for his morning run, and the older who is still snoring, his nose buried into the pillow youâd slept on.
DEANâS POV
Dean is pacing the motel room. Y/Nâs scent is still strong in the air and tinged with the beginnings of her heat, a scent that always drives him fucking wild. Her damp towel hangs on the heated rail in the bathroom, so he knows she hasnât been gone long, but heâs worried about her. Especially lately. And especially with a conniving witch bitch hellbent on vaporising them.
Y/N has been pulling away from him lately, and her sharp tongue has left him licking his wounds more than once. Heâd been wracking his brain, going over their every interaction, trying to figure out what heâd done to piss her off. What hurt him the most was her obvious despair at having to share a bed with him last night.
He and Sam agreed the three of them would stay in one room until theyâd killed the bitch. They were all on the witchâs radar, but if they stayed together, at least they had safety in numbers. When he gave the news to Y/N, she looked at him as if heâd kicked a puppy right in front of her, and that felt like a knife to his gut.
Heâd even thought about saying she could sleep with Sam, but the very thought of that made him want to tear his younger brotherâs throat out, so he had no choice but to grin and bear her cold shoulder and the cold bed.
Not able to make and take comfort in a nest for herself, Y/N had situated herself on the bed as far away from him as possible and contorted into the tiniest little ball she physically could, making it abundantly clear to him and Sam that she felt extremely vulnerable. Dean knew that hurt not only him but Sam too.
The sound of footsteps outside the room makes Dean grab the gun filled with witch-killing bullets from the dresser and point it at the door. He relaxes his stance and lowers the weapon when he recognises Samâs shadow through the grimy motel room window.
âHave you seen Y/N?â Dean barks at his younger brother the second he walks through the door.
âYeah, sheâs sitting in the diner eating breakfast. I ran past her a couple of minutes ago,â Sam replied, stretching his calves and putting his earphones away.
âYou talk to her?â
âNo. I thought it best to give her some space. With the way things have been, and, you know, sheâs on the verge of a heat and, uh, she hasnât really been herself lately, and last night with theâŠâ Sam sighed. âWhat happened between you two, Dean? Because that is not the happy Omega we know.â
âI wish I knew, Sammy. I really do, but Iâm at a loss here.â Dean starts to pace again, in obvious distress and breathing deeply through flared nostrils.
âWhen was the last time things were okay between you?â Sam asked.
âMy rut last month. But even then, the last time we, uh⊠you know⊠she was off.â
âDean,â Samâs jaw clenched, hoping he didnât have to kick his brotherâs ass for forcing himself on her.
âI knew she was distracted. Her head wasnât in it, and I needed her so badââ The dawning of realisation washed over the green-eyed alphaâs features, and he felt sick.
âWhat did you do, Dean?â
âI, uh, I fucked up. I had to get creative with some dirty talk to slick her up enough to get my knot in, and I⊠fuck!â Dean sits on the bed, places his head in his hands and pulls at his hair.
âDean,â the younger alphaâs nostrils were also flaring now, but it was from anger as opposed to his brotherâs distress.
âI played on what she wants. What she really wants, Sam. Iâve always been clear with her about what we have and never used any of what she⊠but that night, I told her Iâd claim her and give her pups.â And just like that, everything makes perfect sense to Dean. Y/N is pushing him away because she desperately wants what he teased her with. âAnd then, as we lay there locked together, I told her it was just talk, and I could never give it to her.â
âJesus, Dean! Youâre telling me you used her by telling her youâd give her what she wanted, then you broke her heart by taking it all back, saying she could never have it so that you could knot her? Thatâs low, even for you!â Sam scoffs.
âI never said she couldnât have it. I said I couldnât give it to her. Sheâs leaving me, Sammy. Itâs why sheâs been pushing me away. Why she feels vulnerable around me now and wants her own space all the time.â
âYeah, and you fucking deserve it!â Sam growls as he swings for Dean, clocking him in the jaw with an almighty crack. âShe loves you, Dean! And you treat her like an omega whore youâve paid to see you through a rut?â As the younger Winchester pulls his fist back and lands another punch, the door slams, making both men jump at the sudden movement.
âEnough!â Y/Nâs voice verberates through the room. âWhat has gotten into you two?â The pack dynamic theyâd forged for themselves had Y/N as the matriarch, and so her maternal tone had them shuffle their feet and look to the floor. âWe have bigger problems to deal with right now, and you two fighting like a couple of juveniles will only give the witch the ammunition she needs to take us all down!â
âSorry, Y/N,â both alphas mumble like a couple of scolded pups.
âI brought breakfast. Eat.â Itâs an order that neither alpha dared disobey. They shuffle their way over to the small table, sitting down and eating silently while Y/N checks and rechecks their duffles for the witch hunt.
Y/NâS POV
Edging silently along the wall, gun in your hand, locked and loaded, you can hear a womanâs voice and Sam grunting, and realise you only have seconds to get this right. Taking a deep breath, you step into the room, and your eyes scan the surroundings.
Sam is against the wall, struggling against invisible restraints, and the witch speaks in Latin. Knowing that can only mean trouble, you raise the gun and take a second to get your aim right between the bitchâs eyes.
Itâs a second too long, and she whips her hand to the right, your gun flying from your grip and landing across the room, as she continues her Latin chant as if you werenât just trying to kill her.
You run at the first purple spark emitted from the witchâs palms, putting yourself between Sam and the witch without hesitation. Youâd missed the first part of her curse, but youâd heard enough to know that the youngest Winchester could absolutely not be hit with it. You needed to get in front of it. You couldnât let her ruin all three of your lives.
Closing your eyes, you wait for the curse to hit, but instead, a gunshot rings through the room, and everything goes silent. You donât get hit by a gust of wind or an electric shock⊠just nothing.
Peeking an eye open, you see the witch lying on the ground, blood pouring beneath her and Dean glaring at you expectantly, his nostrils flared in anger. Not wanting to deal with him right now, you rush over to Sam, scanning over him and checking heâs okay.
âSam! Are you hurt?â you ask as you crouch beside him and scan his body for visible injuries.
âNo, just winded. Iâll be fine. Are you alright?â Sam touches your forearm to stop you from fussing about him.
âSheâs a hell of a lot better than she coulda been!â Dean yells across the room. âWhat the fuck were you thinking, Y/N, huh? Throwing yourself in front of a witch like that, you coulda been killed!â
âDonât be so dramatic, Dean. Iâmââ Dean cuts off your response, marching towards you with his index finger pointing at you.
âI swear, if you say âIâm fine,â so help me!â Dean only stops when heâs toe-to-toe with you, and he puffs his chest and rears his shoulders back, trying to intimidate you. Trying to make you submit to him.
âI am fine, Dean. The curse mentioned a brother, so it wouldnât have affected me anyway,â you argue back.
âIt couldâve killed you for all we know!â
âDean, you need to calm down,â you implore.
âAnd you, Omega,â Dean says, his voice low and full of alpha authority and his finger dangerously close to your face, âneed to start following my orders and stop purposely disobeying me because of some stupid tantrum youâre throwing! Go wait in the car.â
You do the worst possible thing you could do right now and laugh, before turning and walking away from him. You wonât let anyone speak to you like that, and you definitely wonât let Dean, either.
âWhat the hell do you think youâre doing?⊠Donât you dare walk away from me, Omega!â You can smell his pheromones from where you are and know that not only is it in pure anger, but because heâs extra on edge having being able to smell your heat and is starting to get antsy.
âDonât try to alpha me. It wonât work. You havenât claimed me, Dean. I am not your omega. You made it very clear that Iâm only good enough to be your rut bunny, and you know what? Iâm done with that, so stay the hell away from me!â
âY/N!â
Once again, you completely ignore him and keep walking. Itâs hard because your body screams for him, but you wonât let him use you. Not anymore. Never again.
âOmega!â he roars again, and you walk out the door, slamming it behind you.
Screw waiting in the Impala. Youâll make your own way back, grab your bag, and go to another motel for the night. It was going to be a long enough car ride back to the bunker tomorrow, you needed some spaceâfor everyoneâs sake.
While the giant bill was fake, it represented a very real accomplishment. The group raised more than $17,000, which purchased more than $1.6 million in medical debt owed by Philadelphians, according to their nonprofit partner RIP Medical Debt.
The fact that this can be done at all shows how utterly bullshit the entire system is. There was literally no reason for that medical debt to exist in the first place.
Let's say you owe a private hospital ten thousand dollars, but you have very few assets, so they're pretty sure they're never getting any of that back. There's ninety nine other people who also each owe the hospital ten thousand dollars. (It doesn't have to be a hospital; any debt can be sold this way.) The hospital has shit to do and the low chances of you paying them mean it's an unnecessary drain on their time and resources to hound you all for it. But they can get *some* money, by selling your debt to a third party.
Let's say the sell each ten thousand dollar debt for ten dollars (I'm making all these numbers up for simplicity). So a third party gives the hospital one thousand dollars, and now all hundred of you owe that third party ten thousand instead! You're in the clear with the hospital, you owe it to these guys now! And their job is to hound and harrass you for the money you owe. If one of you pays up more than a thousand dollars, you've covered their initial investment. These guys are gambling on the likelihood that enough of you can pay your debts that you make it worth the time they spend tracking you and harrassing you.
Or, instead of trying to get the money out of you, they can just... decide you don't owe them. Why not? They own the debt. They can fork out a thousand bucks, buy a million in debt, and forgive it. That's what these guys did. (This is also a favourite move of John Oliver; if you ever see headlines about John Oliver forgiving debt, this is what he's doing). A small payment can take a massive weight off the shoulders of a lot of struggling people.
Again, I made up the numbers to simplify the math. But this is how the process works.
Hello, my pretties! I have a lot of exciting stuff coming up and (hopefully!) more to come as I attempt to fill my two bingo cards and get stuck into my ideas list!
So, I wanted to organise my tags a little better and make sure youâre on the one you want to be! I mostly write for Dean Winchester, Beau Arlen and Jensen Ackles. There may be a few Sam / Jared or John / Jeffrey Dean Morgan in there at some point, so with that in mind, if you want to be on my tag list, you can choose from:
Everything (will include RPF)
All Characters (no RPF)
All Things Jensen (will include RPF)
Dean Winchester
Beau Arlen
Drop me an ask, a DM, reply, or reblog if you want to be on there and what list youâd like! And thank you all for your support, I love you all đ
Tagging all the lovelies that have at some point asked to be on my lists:
Because Tumblr is doing it's tumblr thing đ I'm going to do this as a separate post instead of a reblog:
After having this on an unofficial hiatus for the last 18-ish months, I am finally ready to start updating again đđ
For those who don't know, I very unexpectedly became pregnant last January (which coincidentally is about the same time I last updated) and the muses decided to no longer shine on me, and I have been adjusting to single motherhood. But now that my baby is spending every other weekend (theoretically, that is) with his dad and I'm at a much less demanding job, I'm hoping to able to write more often.
Good news though! Don't Speak is finished!! With the exception of an epilogue, which may get tacked on to the last chapter depending on its length, everything is done and is currently being beta'd.
I had to change some plans for the final chapters, essentially writing one very long chapter (9k+) and we are working on if and where to split into more manageable length chapters. So, expect at least 2 more chapters and a possible epilogue đ
Thanks to everyone who's been patient with me, and the very kind asks â„ïžâ„ïžâ„ïž
I hope to have the next part posted by no later than the end of next week, and all others will be posted on a weekly basis until complete.
Love you all and I can't wait for you to read the final parts of this crazy ride.
You can catch up here: Don't Speak Masterlist
If you are interested in being tagged in the last few parts please send me an ask, DM, or reblog đ
Also be on the lookout for a new series - Sleeping with Other People - posting dates tbd but I'll have a teaser for you soon đ
A/N: There are TRIGGER WARNINGS in this part - please heed these, and if you think youâll be affected by any of them, please do not read.
You can catch up here!
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âDean,â Mary got up from the table and went to the fridge, opening its door and pulling out a beer bottle. âHave a seat, sweetie,â she said, pulling out a chair and putting the bottle on the wooden dining table.
âThanks, Mom. So, what donât I know?â
âSounds like Y/N might be back in town, son,â John said. âWe donât know for sure yet, only Jess has seen her, but sheâs a nurse, and if it is her, sheâs going by Singer now,â John carefully eyed Dean. Seeing his son go through such a range of emotions was heartbreaking.
âYeah, itâs her,â Dean whispered, wiping his hands down his face.
Clearing his throat, Dean downed half of his beer in one swallow. âBobby told me after Thursday's shift before I went fishing with Benny and Cas. Dannyâs not got long left. His liver and heart are going, and heâs in a hospice. So, Bobby called her and said it might be time to think about coming home.â
âI didnât even think of making the connection to Bobby,â Jess said softly. âHeâs her uncle?â she clarified, and Dean nodded.
âHer momâs brother. Caroline died in a fire when Y/N was little. Then her dad turned to booze and beatings to cope with his grief,â he glanced at Jess, who had a horrified frown on her features.
âFrom what I saw today and how caring and kind she was to me, Iâd never have guessed she went through something like that,â Jess commented, and Dean chuckled.
âThatâs Y/N for you! Carries the whole damn world on her shoulders, and youâd never know it. She cares about those around her way more than she cares about herself. She always has,â he smiled.
âYou guys were a thing back in the day?â Jess asked curiously, and Dean let out a soft laugh.
âYeah, you could say that! Dad, Bobby, and Danny go way back, and Mom and Caroline became best friends, so Y/N and I grew up together. We were best friends before we became childhood sweethearts. She was my first everything, and I was hers.â
âThey couldâve been married with a couple of kids and a dog by now if heâd asked her to stay,â Mary pointed out, and Dean shook his head in exasperation. âDid Bobby say if anyone came with her?â she continued, trying to find out if someone had followed her from her past life.
âNo. No husband or boyfriend,â Dean smiled, knowing the real reason behind his momâs question. âBobby said she dated but never settled with anyone. Apparently, she was a love them and leave them, too!â he chuckled just a little bitterly.
âCute little thing like her, bet she broke some hearts!â Mary grinned. âNow that sheâs back, are you gonna finally tell me why you didnât ask her to stay back then? You and I both know she wouldâve if youâd asked her to,â she enquired gently.
âI wanted to. God, I wanted to so bad! But I couldnât do that to her,â Dean rubbed a hand down his face. âYouâre right, Ma. Sheâd have stayed if I asked her to, and she asked me to ask her. If I had, Iâd have married her as soon as we were eighteen, got her out of that godforsaken house. Ainât no doubt about it. But I couldnât.â He stood from his seat and brought the whiskey out of the liquor cabinet with three glasses. Mary wasnât a whiskey drinker, and Jess was pregnant, so John took one of them and Sam another.
âShe took a damn beating every day for fifteen years, Ma, from the one person who was supposed to protect her. He was her only parent, and he beat her because she looked too much like her mom. Because she survived,â Dean fumed as he fought to keep the tears at bay.
âHer mom begged him to get her out of that house, and he punished her for it. She was only three years old! Thatâs her first memory, the fire and her mom screaming at her dad to make sure she got out. Did you know that?â It was a rhetorical question, but the hurt and shock were hard for everyone to hide.
âI donât know if she still does, but before she left, that memory used to replay itself as a nightmare whenever she was scared or stressed. Y/N didnât deserve any of it. She deserved a life without beatings and abuse, and hatred. And if going to Chicago instead of Lawrence, fuck, even Kansas City or Wichita gave her that, then who was I to stop her?
âIf Iâd asked her to stay, her life wouldnât be any better because of it. Sure, I couldâve protected her from the beatings and got her away from him. But Jody would still call her whenever he got arrested. Y/N would still have to deal with his rage, and sheâd still fall victim to his verbal assaults and vulgar degrading. I did the only thing I could to truly protect her and⊠I let her go.â
Mary rushed over to him and hugged him tightly, trying to ease the pain her eldest son still felt after all this time, and she knew then what she had to do. Mumbling that sheâd be right back, she headed upstairs to her bedroom and opened the drawer on her bedside cabinet. She pulled the ageing envelope out, the word âDeanâ scrawled in blue ink in unmistakable handwriting and returned downstairs.
âYears ago, Y/N wrote me a letter,â Mary explained to Sam and Jess, as the others already knew about it. âShe was in therapy, and her therapist thought itâd be a good idea to write letters to the people she cared about most, and she told me what happened. We all knew something was happening, but I had no idea the extent of it. The fractured skull when she was six? Choking her at seventeen because she missed curfew?â Mary shook her head in disgust. John wrapped his arms around Mary to stop himself from getting in his car and killing the sick bastard himself.
âWas it everâŠ?â Sam let his question hang in the air, not wanting or needing it to be said aloud.
âIt fucking better not have been, or Iâll kill the bastard myself!â John fumed.
âNo, thank God,â Dean answered. âAlways physical and verbal. The fractured skull and when he choked her were the worst heâs done to her. There were countless other fractured and broken bones, though. He was smart, and that made me so fucking mad! Heâd always play off the broken bones as just a kid being a kid, you know? Heâd say she fell from the climbing frame in the park or got injured doing gymnastics or playing hockey or netball. She fractured her skull and had a severe concussion from falling down the stairs, not because he pushed her so hard she fell into a fucking hardwood coffee table.Â
âThe manipulative bastard hardly ever left a mark where anyone could see. She had a few black eyes and bruises on her arms throughout the years, and that was it, at least until he tried to strangle her. He damn near killed her that night. She was blacking in and out of consciousness and only got him off her by hitting him over the head with her momâs crystal vase. She knocked him out cold!â he chuckled sadly. âAll because she was helping me graduate. He thought she missed curfew because she was âwhoring herself outâ to me, but she was helping me study. I never forgave myself for that.â
âDonât blame yourself, son. Y/N told me you knew everything and made her feel safe and loved. She told me you blamed yourself for what happened to her that night, but she knew it would have been something else if it wasnât because she missed curfew. She never blamed you for it. For any of it,â Mary smiled sadly at Deanâs scoff of laughter. âAnd she apologised. For leaving you and breaking your heart,â Mary said, desperate to comfort him.
âI broke hers more when I didnât ask her to stay,â Dean responded. âIf I could go back, IâdâŠâ he sniffed, wiping the tears from his cheeks.
âI know you were hurt when a letter never came for you. But one did, and it was in with mine. Y/N told me to give you this when the time was right and if it was in your best interests. I honestly didnât know if Iâd ever give it to you. If the time would ever be right, but that time is now. Iâm not gonna apologise for keeping this from you,â Mary held her hand up to cut off his rebuttal. âIf Iâd given this to you all those years ago, youâd have run off after her, and I donât think youâd like what you wouldâve found,â she finished as she handed him the letter.
Dean sobbed as he recognised her handwriting and ran his fingers gently over the faded ink. Turning it over, he glanced up at his mom, a silent question hanging between them.
âI didnât read it. It wasnât my place to,â Mary raised her hand, wiped his wet cheeks, and gave him a gentle wink. Dean tore open the envelope without another secondâs hesitation.
A/N: There are TRIGGER WARNINGS in this part - please heed these, and if you think youâll be affected by any of them, please do not read. You can catch up here!
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âHey, kiddo! Did you just come off shift?â Jody greeted her brightly.
âNo, I came off an extended double at two oâclock this morning, and Iâm back in tonight at seven. Is Uncle Bobby home?â Y/N asked.
âNot yet, sweetie. He took his crew for breakfast. Why? Is everything okay?â The concern she heard in Jodyâs tone made her smile.
âYeah, everythingâs good, itâs just⊠are you still looking for a new tenant for the apartment? âCause I got myself a job at Lawrence Memorial and need to find somewhere to live!â Y/N grinned.
âYou did not!â Jodyâs excitement made her buzz.
âEmergency Nurse Practitioner, Y/N Singer at your service!â she laughed at Jodyâs gleeful screech.
âBobbyâs gonna be so happy! He might even crack a smile!â Jody joked.
âHold up now. Letâs not get crazy!â Y/N replied, and both women cackled with laughter.
âWhen do you start?â Jody asked once their joy settled.
âThe beginning of next month. Iâll work for three more weeks, hammer the overtime, and get extra money for moving costs and furniture. Iâll spend the last week packing and shipping. Iâll probably move out there the Thursday before I start. That gives me the weekend to unpack and settle,â Y/N said.
âHow are you feeling about coming home, kiddo?âÂ
âUhm, okay, I guess? Itâs time. Uncle Bobby was right about that, but donât tell him I said that!â Y/N giggled.
âIâd never dream of it!â Jody chuckled.
âItâll be strange, donât get me wrong, but it is time. I need to stop hiding. I need to finally deal with my shit, you know? My father andâŠâ
âDean?â Jody pushed gently at Y/Nâs sudden silence.
âYeah,â she sighed. âBobby doesnât talk to me about him. I know heâs not married, but he might be with someone. Thereâs still so much there for me, and I think⊠I know I need to talk it out. Move forward, whatever that looks like.â
âHeâs single. Heâs had as much luck on the dating front as you have. He doesnât have a friend like you do, though. Heâs more of a one-night-only kinda guy,â Jody chuckled.
âHa! Been there, done that!â Y/N scoffed a laugh.
âI did not need to know that!â The grin she could hear in Jodyâs voice told her she was teasing, and both women laughed heartily.
âSeriously, kiddo, I think reaching out to Dean is a great idea. Iâm sure you both have a lot to discuss. You both need to move on, one way or another.â Jody said gently.
âYeah, I know. Itâs easier said than done, though,â Y/N sighed.
âEverything worth having, doing or saying always is, Y/N.â
âWhen did you become so wise?â Y/N sniggered.
âHey! Watch it, or youâll be sleeping in your car when you get back!â Jody jokingly scolded, and Y/N laughed again.
âAlright, kiddo, I gotta get ready for my shift. Bobby and I will have the apartment cleaned and freshened up for you. Let me know when you start shipping stuff, and you can send it to us first. Weâll get it there for you.â
âThanks, Jody. Iâll call Bobby later after heâs had some time to sleep, but if you see him before you head outâŠâ
âIâll tell him his princess is coming home,â Jody said excitedly, and she was starting to wonder who was more excited about her coming home.
âThanks. I love you, Jody.â
âLove you too, kiddo.â
Y/N ended the call and fell back onto the mattress with a relieved sigh. She knew sheâd be welcomed back to Lawrence with open arms, at least by Uncle Bobby and Jody. Still, sheâd been gone far too long, and there was this tiny nagging doubt in her mind that said no one wanted her back after the chaos sheâd caused by leaving in the first place.
Jody had become so much more than an aunt to Y/N when she and Bobby started dating. She was her best friend and confidante but never slid into the âmomâ role. That was, and would always be, Mary Winchester.Â
As part of her therapy, Y/N had written five letters. One to herself, three to the people she cared for most in the world, and one to her father. Sheâd sent three of those letters. Okay, technically, sheâd sent two. She felt the people hurt most by her departure needed an explanation: Mary and Uncle Bobby.
Dean knew everything sheâd been through - it was why she understood him not asking her to stay - but Mary and Uncle Bobby didnât. Y/N made Dean promise not to tell anyone, and Dean was a man of his word. She knew everyone knew something was going on at home; the bruises and flinching at loud noises needed no explanation, but she never admitted to it to anyone but Dean.
The blame she had for her motherâs death, the wish itâd been her instead, Dean was the only one who knew all of it. He was also the only person who knew the vile words, insults, and almost daily degradation sheâd been through. Only she, Dean, and her therapist knew about every time he struck her and every harsh word heâd voiced at her.
So, it was with incredible strength that Y/N wrote it down in a letter. She relived everything her father had subjected her to and apologised to Mary for breaking her sonâs heart. Sheâd put Deanâs letter beside Maryâs with instructions to give it to him âat the right time.â However, Y/N also knew there was a chance Mary would never give him the letter, so sheâd reluctantly added, âif you think itâs in his best interests,â at the end.
She still didnât know if Dean had read her letter, but Mary replied, telling her she had forgiven her and loved her. Sheâd always love her and was sorry for everything her father had put her through. Y/N had expected it but was still shocked by the anger Mary had expressed towards her for not speaking up when she and John wouldâve done everything in their power to protect her and get her out of her fatherâs house, but Y/N knew it ultimately wouldnât have made a difference.
âDean?â Bobby said at the end of the shift. âCan I have a minute?â
âSure, Chief. Whatâs up?â Dean asked as he walked into Bobbyâs office.
âClose the door and take a seat,â Bobby said as he pushed aside the paperwork from last nightâs fire.
âIâm sure you remember I spoke to Y/N and asked her to think about coming home,â Bobby said gently.
âYeah, I remember,â Dean swallowed nervously. She wasnât coming. He could feel it.
âA few weeks ago, she came here-â Bobby started, raising his hands in a âhold on, let me finishâ gesture at the anger and hurt that settled on Deanâs face.
âI didnât know she was here. She flew in and out the same day because she had an interview at Memorial. She didnât tell us because she had to be back in Chicago to work a night shift,â Bobby smiled softly as Deanâs body and face relaxed, and he slumped back in his chair.
âHowâd she do?â Dean asked, his voice shaky.
âShe starts on Monday,â Bobby grinned as Dean smiled. âSheâs moving into Jodyâs apartment over the weekend.â
âDoes she, uh,â Dean started and cleared his throat before he tried again. âIs there anyone coming with her? You know, boyfriend, kid, dog?â he chuckled, trying to act nonchalant, but Bobby saw right through him.
âNo,â he smiled at the younger man. âSheâs dated, but nothing ever stuck. According to Jody, she was the love âem and leave âem type until she made an arrangement with a friend,â Bobby shifted in his chair uncomfortably. Dean couldnât stop the smirk crossing his face at seeing his mentor squirm.Â
âNo doubt she broke a lot of hearts!â Dean chuckled, and Bobby smiled wistfully.
âIâm sure she did. Now go on, get outta here! Enjoy your long weekend fishing at the cabin. Iâll see you next week.â
âThanks, Bobby,â Dean said as he stood.
âFor what?â Bobby raised his eyebrow in confusion.
âTelling me about Y/N/N.â
âPromised I would, didnât I? Besides, canât have you running into her with one of your love âem and leave âems on your arm now, can we?â he winked. âGo on now, get!â
âHey, are you okay, babe?â Sam asked, flustered as he ran into his parentsâ house.
âIâm fine, Sam!â Jess smiled as she rolled her eyes playfully at his concern.
âAre you sure? Did you get checked out properly?â he asked, eyes scanning every inch of her to ensure no sign of illness or injury.
âSam, babe,â Jess said as calmly as she could, smiling a greeting at John when he entered the kitchen. âIâm fine. I felt a little faint at work, and the new nurse, who is so lovely and not a bitter old bitch like the last one, took me into a room and checked me over. She took a blood sample and gave me a scan just to be sure. It was a little low blood sugar, and she made me sit on the bed until weâd eaten chocolate and drank a soda. I promise Iâm much better now. Rowena sent me home for the rest of the day to take it easy. Iâm under strict orders to eat at least one more chocolate bar or a slice of cake, put my feet up, and get some rest.â
âYouâre sure?â Sam checked again.
âOh my God, Sam!â she laughed. âYes! I promise! Iâm taking Y/Nâs advice and being waited on by an anxious grandmother-to-be for a few hours while I take it easy!â
âY/N?â Mary asked, placing a generous slab of lemon drizzle cake before Jess and Sam. âIt wouldnât happen to be Y/N Y/L/N by any chance, would it?â Mary finished with a little chuckle as if it was nothing, but it came out more like a plea.
âNo,â Jess mumbled around a mouthful of cake. âY/N Singer. But when she heard my name was Winchester, she asked if I was any relation to you guys. She said she went to school with Dean. Maybe she got married?â she said, putting more cake in her mouth.
âWhat?â Jess asked at the sudden silence in the room.
âMaybe she took her mamaâs name when she left,â John voiced what had been on everyoneâs mind.
âDo you think Dean knows?â Sam questioned, and Jess looked downright confused.
âDean knows what?â Dean asked, returning from the bathroom and leaning against the kitchen doorframe.
Summary: Childhood sweethearts, Dean and Y/N, are very much in love with each other. When she accepts a full scholarship to an out-of-state college, she finally gets to leave behind her traumatic childhood and abusive father, but it means leaving Dean behind too.
Over a decade later, Y/N returns to Lawrence, Kansas, and finally tries to heal the only wounds she has left⊠the psychological and emotional scars her father gave her and the heartbreak she endured by Dean Winchester, the one that got away.
A/N: This story will contain flashbacks and mentions of the physical and verbal abuse of a child. If this is a sensitive subject for you or you might be triggered by this content, please consider whether this story is right for you.
A/N 2: Iâve tagged those whoâve previously asked to be on my tag list, but please, please let me know if you want to be removed for this one. And if you want to be added, just comment, DM, or Ask!
When she told Uncle Bobby she had no intention of returning to Lawrence until her father was gone, he and Jody booked a slot at City Hall to get married and asked her and Dean to be their witnesses. Y/N was delighted to be able to share their special day with them.
Saying goodbye to them was hard, but her goodbye with Dean last night had been so much worse. As she pulled out onto the main road that led out of town, she sighed deeply as her memory flashed back to last night.
Y/N and Dean had spent the whole night together, their true feelings escaping them in the throes of passion. It wasnât their first time together, but it was the most special, closely followed by the time they took each otherâs virginity when they were both sixteen.
Her feelings for Dean ran deep. Heâd always owned her heart, and after a night of raw, emotional lovemaking, she knew he always would. Who knew? Maybe one day sheâd come back to Lawrence, come back to him. But it wasnât fair for either of them to live on a maybe.
âAsk me to stay,â Y/N whispered in the darkness of her bedroom. Both of them were naked, sweating, and basking in their afterglows.
âYou know I canât do that, princess. I want to, but I canât,â he responded, his voice cracking with emotion before he kissed her bare shoulder. Her lip trembled, but she swallowed her tears and rolled over to straddle his waist.
âThen make love to me again, Dean.â
She wiped a tear from her cheek and grinned wildly at the road sign despite her sad emotions.Â