#!tarren

[detectivewayne]

#[tarren says: not my fault you're a whineass]

[Meanwhile Connor says it's not his fault you're a dickbag.]

[detectivewayne]

Hey, uh, Coin? D'you have a moment?

[detectivewayne]

Tarren's Star

You are:

[] A healer [x] A sword fighter [] A sorceror/sorceress [] A fist fighter [] An archer [] A damsel in distress [] Canon fodder

[x] A JERK THAT FIGHTS WITH YOUR JERKINESS

In our adventures I would:

[] Be the one to rescue you [x] Be the one getting rescued [] Always offer to pay for our drink [] Often leave you behind [x] Try to seduce you at every turn--well not EVERY turn...

We met:

[] Once upon a dream [] In our childhood [x] On a hot summer’s day/winter’s night [] While we were neck deep in trouble

Do I secretly love you?

[x] Yes--ish [x] No [] I refuse to answer this!

If you were in trouble:

[x] I would do my best to help you no matter what happens! [] I would help, but only if I could benefit as well. [x] I might help. Maybe. [x] I’d let you rot. It’d serve you right. [x] You? In trouble? I’m the one in trouble! Help me!

When we are alone:

[x] It’s just you and me, sharing a meal by the fire. [] We are in the library, lounging about and studying. [] We have long conversations about everything and nothing at the same time. [x] It’s in the bedroom.

Together we shall:

[] Rule over all! [] Grow old and adventure together. [] Part ways, sweetly, yet sadly. [] Create a new kingdom all our own! [x] Discover new lands! [x] Conquer new lands! [x] Make sweet sweet love.--HA! As if...

And finally:

[x] We are friends. [] We are enemies

[x] I don't really know WHAT we are...

[detectivewayne]

So, uh... how's your hand?

[Not that he actually cares. He's just checking, because he's a good crewmate.]

[detectivewayne]

[The temptation to stick potato peels in Tarren's boots when he's not looking is strong, but Connor does have a slight sense of self-preservation. He's not sure why, but somedays it's frustrating just looking at the man's face.]

[detectivewayne]

HELLO [take a guess who this is for]

1. First impression: Oh crap, that guy’s bleeding!

2. Truth is: You weren’t bleeding, y’ass.

3. How old do you look: Hella old. 30’s

4. Have you ever made me laugh: No. Most certainly not. Pretty sure y’get a laugh out of me though.

5. Have you ever made me mad: Constantly.

6. Best feature: … You’re really handsome. NOTHING.

7. Have I ever had a crush on you: Wh-what? No. No, no way. Never. Like hell. Maybe a little one.

8. You’re my: Kidnapper.

9. Name in my phone: I don’t have a phone anymore. If I did it’d be JACKASS #1

10. Should you post this too? If y’feel like it I guess, I don’t care what y’do. Jerk.

[detectivewayne]

Obviously. This would be for Tarren.

If we kissed?

[] Quickie.[x] Tongue.[] Softly bite your lip.[] We wouldn’t.[] Long and meaningful.[] Let’s hit up the bedroom.[] You remember last time?[x] Awkward…[] Lol no.

[x] TerriFYING

Would I go out with you?[x] Yes, definitely.[] No.[] I want to, but it wouldn’t work.[] Maybe. XD[] Nope, you’re like family.[] You’re cute, but probably not.[] Just simply not my type.[] If I knew you better.[] Already did.[x] I don’t know.

[x] Maybe if you wereN’T TERRIFYING

If we took a picture together, we’d be…[] Hugging each other.[] Just chilling.[] Holding hands.[] Kissing.[] Acting dumb.[x] Normal picture.[] You holding me from behind.

[x] Me trying to get away and you holding me in place by the scruff of my neckYou are…[] Cute/Pretty.[x] Good looking.[x] Sexy.[] All of the above ^-^You + me + room = …[] Movies.[] Cuddling.[] Hanging out.[] Kissing.[] Playing games.[] Everything.[x] Wouldn’t let you in. [Except I wouldn’t have a choice in th’matter since I’m kinda kidnapped here…]

You should…[] Hit me up.[] Be mine.[] Marry me.[] Reblog this so I can send you a heart.[] be studying

[x] Not be kidnapping meIf we got married, I’d…[x] Divorce you.[] Make kids.[] Take your money and bounce.[] Smash every day.[] I would cheat on you.[x] Be faithful.[] Kill you in your sleep [] We wouldn’t