#{emrys

[nerd0608]

Arthur thinking Merlin has spent 3 days in the tavern, meanwhile Merlin has been saving Arthur from the biggest threat to his life so far.

[dat-soldier]

Emrys the Harvester Butterfly (belongs to @bonboneka)~

[makielkowo]

patron saint of being doomed (and sacrificing everything for a blond guy)

[runboybeneaththemoon]

Arthur: Okay, so you're my servant now. It's not really that important of a position, just like, idk, make sure you bring me my breakfast on time

Merlin: I would die for you, I would kill for you, I'd give up my humanity and become a living weapon for you, I would sit by your grave for over a millennium, awaiting your return-

Arthur: but would you bring me breakfast on time?

Merlin: Well that's asking a bit much, don't you think?

[birdletss]

jokesters

[nightninjaboy]

[littlestarlex]

I've been tossing around the idea of a Merthur fic where Merlin doesn't become Arthur's manservent and instead is just Gaius's assistant as the court physician.

So Merlin is still around, collecting herbs and delivering tonics and the like to people in the castle, one of whom is occasionally Arthur.

Arthur doesn't think much of him at first.

The few times they've interacted Merlin said barely more than a few words and then promptly left once Arthur dismissed him.

Then Gwen and Morgana both mention the "cute assistant" to Arthur casually during conversation, but it's quickly forgotten as the conversation continued.

And then he starts hearing the knights talk about him. Some funny joke he told, or how he schooled them in a game of dice.

Really, the only person who doesn't have some anecdote about the boy is the cook, who seems to vehemently despise him. (He may have stolen a snack or two, who can say?)

And he gets curious, can you blame him?

So one day, during training, he insists he hurt his shoulder and was going to go to the physician's chamber since it's nearer the training ground than his room. But of course he wants to see this physician's assistant that has everyone charmed.

As luck would have it, Gaius is out treating someone at the time, so Merlin happens to be there, grinding herbs for a poultice when Arthur stops in.

And of course he treats the prince, can't exactly turn him away. He offers to apply a salve to his shoulder, which Arthur says yes to, and then subsequently whines the whole time because Merlin's boney fingers are making his aches worse. "I don't think Gaius will ever be able to retire if these are the hands he intends to leave us in."

Merlin rolls his eyes and digs a little harder just to spite him. "Well I suppose I'm just not used to dealing with wounds this serious. We may have to amputate the arm, sire, I'm not sure it can be saved. But don't worry, I'm very handy with a saw."

"And how about with a sword?"

"Hold it with the pointy end facing out."

"Ah, aren't you funny."

"Well being a knight is hardly an intellectual pursuit."

Arthur levels him with a look. "I'm a knight."

Merlin sort of looks Arthur up and down. "Hm."

And okay Arthur isn't used to being picked at, usually no one would dare talk to him like that...but he likes it, even if he can't admit it. Enough so that he starts finding reasons to come to the physician's chambers just to have a little conversation with this odd man who seems to have no respect for his status.

One day he claimed his head felt like it was splitting in two. Another time he said he couldnt hear out of his left ear. Arthur even went so far as to have a "hunting accident" where he was nearly gored by a boar. (Merlin asked and the knights all say they saw no boar, but no one dared to call him out on it.)

And sometimes he claims to have trouble sleeping just so that Merlin will have to deliver a tonic late at night. Always the last delivery of the day, so that Merlin can stay for a few minutes and exchange wit with the prince.

Anyway just a thought.

[andromaex]

okay but we need to TALK about how Merlin just casually gives merlin the most insane, compounding trauma and then expects him to go back to polishing boots like nothing happened

like. this is a BOY.

this is a teenager who shows up in camelot and within approximately five minutes is told by Gaius: “hey so you have world-ending levels of power :) also if anyone finds out you will be executed :) have fun!”

and then Kilgharrah is like: “your destiny is everything. your feelings are irrelevant.”

???????

so now we have merlin:

cannot tell anyone who he is

cannot be fully known by anyone

cannot even react honestly to the things happening to him

and THEN

Will dies protecting merlin’s secret → merlin learns: people die if they know me

Freya dies in his arms right after he allows himself to love someone → merlin learns: if i love someone, they die

Balinor (his father!!) dies basically immediately → merlin learns: i don’t get to keep family

Lancelot sacrifices himself → merlin learns: good people die for me

Gwaine is tortured and dies → merlin learns: i can’t save everyone, even when i try

and then. THEN.

Arthur Pendragon dies.

after YEARS of merlin:

saving his life in secret

sacrificing everything

shaping his entire existence around this ONE destiny

and what does merlin get?

arthur finding out the truth for like five minutes and then dying in his arms.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME.

and the show just— ends.

no processing. no support system. no “hey maybe this boy has severe survivor’s guilt and complex trauma”

because merlin can’t even GRIEVE properly.

he can’t tell anyone:

why will died

who freya was to him

that balinor was his father

what lancelot actually did

how many times he saved arthur

so all of that grief just sits there. unspoken. unacknowledged. unresolved.

like imagine carrying:

the weight of destiny

the responsibility for a kingdom

the knowledge that your loved ones died for or because of you

and the fact that the ONE person it was all for is gone anyway