I think I've just been converted to Djokoraz (sp?) because that one video of Carlos hanging off Nole like a koala with his shorts hiked over his thigh muscles is so... how do i politely call a man a whore
I've talked about how both jade and aventurine got the "you fell for the character's facade that's meant to be dismantled by the viewers" thing with fans before, but honestly, I'm starting to wonder if it's really topaz's facade that I myself fell for the most.
maybe it's the trickiest one because
it's not that obvious of an objective untruth, and,
topaz herself generally seems to confidently believe in it just as much as anyone else does.
unlike aventurine and jade, who often present themselves as either obviously suspicious or at minimum decently potentially dubious, topaz presents herself with an air of positive sincerity and indeed she genuinely values sincerity in business as well.
but topaz is not really as straightforwardly sincere as she seems. as you can see from her attempt at colonizing belobog, her strategies are still fairly manipulative whenever it's necessary... but that's not all.
topaz and aventurine truly are very similar. you ever think about how topaz is actually even "better" at self-deception than aventurine due to the differences in their circumstances and characters? because the latter can only do it halfway and cannot achieve full and thorough self-deception, and thus it's much easier - by comparison to topaz - for the audience to see that aventurine is an actor who plays a character and puts on a show.
topaz presents herself with an aura of sincerity and confidence, and she genuinely values sincerity and directness. she certainly doesn't put on acts and play characters every day. topaz's deception runs deeper because she has truly, genuinely believed in these "lies". so it's not even lying anymore! she's earnest, positive, confident, competent, intelligent and hardworking. all of those things are entirely, factually true. that's why we all believe in it.
that's also why she's actually an even more deceptive character on a meta level, I think. it's quite true what aventurine says: the best way to prevent others from seeing your true colors is first being able to fool yourself. the deception and self-deception are so deep-seated in topaz's psychology they simply no longer register as deception at all. but fundamentally, she's no different than aventurine: they both have and/or had to continue to believe (or semi-"believe") in certain things in order to survive and head forward in life. it's just that topaz's self-deception is more effective and successful, while aventurine is ultimately conscious of its base nature as self-deception even while continuing to use it to cope with reality.
when topaz tells us: (paraphrased) "I work for the IPC; I'm extremely good at working; I work all the time, even in my dreams; I love to work; work makes me happy; work can be used for good; I work for good reasons," and so on and so forth;
the context that is not getting said is: "I've always known, since I was much younger, that I'm contract-bound to work for the IPC forever until I die."
essentially - yes, topaz absolutely seems to have very actively chosen to work for the IPC, but when you think about it in context, you realize that the thing is that topaz never had a choice NOT to work for the IPC, in one way or another, in the first place. she/her life/her labour was sold to the IPC like everyone else on her planet. and she's known this since her adolescent years or even younger, which definitely had a strong effect in shaping her beliefs, life goals, hobbies, and self-identity.
really, thinking about it this way, in topaz's circumstances, her mindset, worldview and beliefs have to be a major part of exactly what's keeping her overall emotionally healthy(-ish) and mentally stable in, and they have likely been a major part of that for years now. if, say, there's someone with the same academic & practical skills, intelligence and capability for hardwork as topaz, who is however unable to convince themselves to think this way and adopt this worldview at all, they would be so utterly miserable, dysfunctional and negative for as long as they are still trapped in such a role in this system.
topaz's worldview:
"everything can be brought and sold; everything in this world has an instrinsic monetary value; some aspects of capitalism are a necessary evil; capitalism & colonialism can be used for good, and I will use it for good; I will save people who are like my younger self through benevolent imperialism"
the context that is not being said:
"I/my labour/my life was sold to the IPC when I was young along with everyone else on my home planet in exchange of 'salvation'",
"in order to go on in life we/I had to accept it was a good thing, they are our savior, and this is just how the world works",
"if I view the world this way then I can convince myself that I'm doing good in this world instead of becoming just like the oppressors who enslaved us",
"if I view the world this way, then I'm [basically] in control of myself, I have agency in my life, doing exactly what I enjoy, living up to my sense of justice, living my life exactly how I want to live it".
the last point is very critical, I think. imo topaz probably fundamentally fears being “helpless” (the way she once was, when she was a child) more than anything. she never wants to go back to that ever again. that's likely at least one key part of what drove her to be such an extremely hardworking, "early-maturing", hypercompetent overachiever. (this is also a sunday parallel, of course)
A second-over redesign of an old OC I created back in ‘08. This is Zeldan the Genie, and she used to be a Sonic OC!
Of course, she could still be one if people wanted to attach her to some kind of fandom, but I feel with her current design it may be a little disconnected. Originally, the inspirations and ideas for her came from Sonic and the Secret Rings (It was one of the newer games at the time!) and so her initial art was very much based on Shahra.
