#12.10.18

[sleepsucks]

[liamfashionarchive]

Liam at the British Fashion Awards | December 10, 2018

Bvlgari Octo Finissimo Skeleton Watch ($29,300)

[alltheselights]

December 10th, 2018

[stylesarchive]

bellv2: どこ行く？ (Where are you going?)

[zaynmalikupdates]

zaynmalik: On tomorrow with @ZaneLowe @Beats1 9am LA / 12pm NY / 5pm UK 📡 Playing a new tune ‘There You Are’ #ICARUSFALLS

[missinvisibleandco]

"Whatcha Walking On?"

The floor of the tennis court.(12.10.18)

[liamnews]

I love the idea of acting. It’s something I’ve been wanting to do for a long time. Singing will always be my first love though.

[notsofine]

We talk a bit more about her leaving. We have 2 more sessions together and I am still finding it hard to accept. I know that fighting against it makes it harder but at the same time I cannot let go. I feel that letting her go would be letting go of the one and only lifeline I have left. I am not ready for this. There isn’t enough time. I have so much more I haven’t been able to make sense of yet.

T says that even when sessions end it doesn’t mean that everything just stops and everything disappears. She says a part of me will always be with her same like a part of her will always be with me- what we have done together doesn’t simply stop. People don’t stop exisiting just because you don’t see each other, and I have impacted her the same as she has had an impact of me and that will always remain. What I have learnt will be with me always.

She reminds me that I will never really be alone, and that support will be around if I need it (we just need to find the right supports). I am afraid that I can’t do this alone. She says I have already; that I’ve put the work in day after day and it has been all me. I tell her it’s not the same. She admits that it isn’t- but group is once a week, I see her once a week and aside from the 3.5 hours a week of therapy and some ongoing crisis support everything else has been me. She reminds me that I can and she believes in me- I have to believe in me, too.

It isn’t the same. It won’t be the same.

I don’t want her to go.