#4:46pm

[annie-lalalah]

I still wanna be there for you

[fleshintogear]

i’m Back from nap time

[thefaultinoursprinkles]

and my meeting that was supposed to go from 12:45 to 1:45 went from 12:45 to fucking 3:30 and I was like ok what can I do in 30 minutes so I was like I’ll finish going through my email (only got through about half of the unread ones this morning) and I just finished

[luthain]

So...

Can you use tarot cards as a therapy tactic? Because I’m totally investing if I can be neutral to psychology and spirituality and using both to help those who need it and not as a con or divine truth?

Example: this card: I explain the meaning BUT follow up with “what was the first thought that came to mind AFTER I explained the meaning to it?

I’m not psychic (that I know of) but you came to talk, what’s up?

[enioyyyyyyyyyy]

粉色還是少女不起來 。

[secrets-of-may]

I’ll be 25 in less than 3 weeks.

And nothing seems certain in my life.

I don’t know what to do with my life.

I don’t want to follow my career in talk therapy anymore, as my passion has been replaced with nothing but self-doubt, incompetence, bitterness, and cynicism. 

I have no back up plan or any passions.

I don’t even have a strong conviction or passion to get better or rid myself of depression.

I suppose I have an interest in writing, but my self-doubt, crippled with a healthy dose of writer’s block doesn’t leave me with much to fall back on.

Writing doesn’t pay the bills.

Not the kind of writing I’d want or like to do anyway.

I just would like to find a quiet administrative assistant job that pays well and go from there. Pathetic.

I feel like I have no direction in my life. 

I hardly even move.

I’m stagnant.

So I can’t even calm to wonder aimlessly and end up somewhere.

I don’t go with the flow.

I meet the barest minimum to go unnoticed. 

.

.

.

I’m speaking to strangers over the internet.

Strangers who are all biologically, relatives of mines, but strangers nonetheless.

I don’t know if it will lead somewhere.

I hadn’t given much thought to tracking down my birth mom and I hadn’t given any thought to tracking down my biological father (for fearing the worst).

But now talking to strangers on the internet, I realize these people I’m talking to could be on either side of my biological make up tree (did I go out of my way to say family tree? I think I did there).

I’m not sure I even want to meet these people.

I don’t think myself particularly good with people in general (always presenting a fake and distant persona) and to be honest, don’t really like people all that much . . .  bc unnecessary drama always seems to follow.

[rewindbuttongal-blog]

9/27/16

Welp. 

Today, you lost another friend. But let me tell you, it was for the better. You can’t keep caring about someone who doesn’t care about you, let alone, themselves.

People come and go. I guess that’s a part of growing up.