modern mailman au shenanigans
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modern mailman au shenanigans
You x Hanma Headcanons!
(I'm not good with fluffy stuff, so sorry if this sucks)
🚬You're lying in bed asleep or getting ready to and he'll send you a text saying "Get dressed. We're going out." No warning whatsoever.
🚬You think it'll be a romantic night, but nope! You're watching him try to pick the lock on a claw machine to get you a teddy bear.
🚬After the owner kicks you out, the two of you sit on a curb outside a convenience store, splitting ramen because neither of you had enough money for a second cup.
🚬Cannot drive the speed limit without his skin itching.
🚬He took you out on a late-night ride and was speeding the entire time.
🚬When he got pulled over, he said, "Is this a bad time to tell you that my license is suspended?"
🚬You suggested going bowling, thinking there was no way he could ruin a date at a bowling alley, right?
🚬He tried to show off his strength by throwing a ball down the alley and ended up hitting one of the TVs. (You're not allowed there anymore.)
🚬He has a habit of suggesting going out to eat, but in the middle of eating, he'll be like, "I'll pay you back later." You stop eating and stare at him. "I thought you were paying?"
🚬 The restaurant has both your pictures up labeled as diners and dashers.
🚬 Tried to do a backflip off a table to impress you, but the table toppled over and he cracked his back on the edge.
🚬 He doesn't hug you. He drapes himself over you, knowing full well how heavy he is.
🚬 Randomly puts you in a headlock to "Keep you on your toes."
🚬 If he kisses you, it'll be random. You never know when he'll do it, but when he does, he'll walk away like nothing happened.
🚬 Sticks his finger into your mouth whenever you yawn.
🚬 He'll lean in, making it look like he'll kiss you, but he'll belch in your face instead. (And it stinks)
🚬 Purposefully leaves doors wide open and pretends he can't hear you yelling at him to close the door.
🚬 Not a single picture of you in his camera roll is a good one. He knows damn well he could take better pictures, but he chooses not to.
🚬 Don't bother asking him to delete them either. "But you look so cute with a bedhead!" or "Who cares if you can see your double chin from this angle?"
🚬 Whenever you're trying to make a decision, he'll be in your ear saying, "Are you sure?" to fuck with you.
🚬 Makes those obnoxious biting sounds whenever you take a bite of food.
🚬 If you stuff your plate he'll shout "DAMN" loud asf and pull out his phone to take a picture.
🚬 He'll show up at your place with a boombox blasting music. Not to be romantic, just to be annoying.
🚬 He convinced you to skip school before. The day ended with your parents having to pick you up from the police station.
🚬 Thrives off the fact that your parents hate him. When he picks you up, he'll shout, "Hi, Mr and Mrs. L/n! What wonderful weather we're having, right?" In the most sarcastic voice ever.
🚬 Bought you two matching lighters. (Even if you don't smoke.)
🚬If you say you want to try smoking, he'll tell you, "Pretty girls don't smoke."
🚬 If he sees you liking or commenting on another guy's post, he'll send you a screenshot saying, "Feeling friendly today, aren't we?"
🚬 Leans over to look at your phone screen and says stuff like "Who are we texting?"
🚬 If you're laughing at something on your phone, he'll be like "I wanna laugh too."
🚬Tell him you're going out with a guy friend, he'll be sarcastic asf about it. "Okay, have fun with your boyfriend!" "Want me to drop you off? I'll let him know that you're single."
🚬If another guy compliments you, he makes a show about it. "Wow. That was great. Maybe you should write her a poem next time!"
🚬Texts you in the middle of hangouts: "Hope you're having fun because I'm not…" "It's okay. I wouldn't wanna be around me either…"
MY FYP ACTUALLY WANTS ME TO KMS
pinterest and tumblr is a girls dream
I have officially become so engulfed in a ship I would rather see them as best friends rather than lovers. I want them to be so utterly in love that they are friends rather than dating. I think it’s because a friendship will always mean more to me personally than romantic relationships.
me & slime 😜❤️
@infectedpiercings
james and lily have the opposite of commitment issues they got over commitment issues. take 7 years to get their shit together and start dating and then a year later they’re married and with child like LMAO??