god im so fucking single it actually fucking hurts
This man would prefer to never see people.
He loves his family and you, those are the only people he needs.
You however, are a little social butterfly. Everywhere you two go, someone knows you. When random people say ‘good morning’ to you, you smile brightly and respond enthusiastically in kind. Or, you’ll randomly just speak to a stranger and end up laughing with them.
You do not see yourself this way but he does. And then everyone in the inner circle would make jokes about you talking to random people and how it stresses Rhysand out because he doesn’t want you kidnapped.
“By no means are you ignorant to the world's threats, I just don’t trust people with my figurative baby sister.” He explained when you asked him if he thought you were stupid.
He called you his sunrise, you were bright, warm, sweet, you gave him hope. Meanwhile, you called him a grumpy bat. Sometimes you called him a grumpy old bat. Depends on if his bones were creaking or not.
You were a magnet for people. Randomly, people would say things to you. Or you’d offer to help people if they needed it (but only when you had one of the guys with you, you didn’t trust everyone easily).
You made friends everywhere you went, he however, kinda just sat behind and watched you interact with people. Made sure people didn’t take advantage of your kind heart, and nobody was being a pig with you.
Azriel loved how social you were, he also adored how introverted you were.
For example, while out at Ritas, he’d watch you be chatty and then just slow down. He can see when you start to zone out when your social battery has completely run out. So he’ll always say that he’s tired and wants to go home so the blame doesn’t go to you because it makes you anxious and you’ll feel the need to apologize constantly.
You two would hold hands coming home, bumping into each other and giggling. You may be socially burnt out, but you never felt that way with him.
He loved the “after” part of a night out. Watching you wipe your makeup off delicately with cloth, then hop in the bath with him. You’d delicately wash his wings as he hates feeling like they’re dirty. You two scrub each other down. When he gets to washing your hair, he’s so incredibly gentle with his hands. The idea of even accidentally pulling your hair hurts him. Your eyes roll to the back of your head as he massages your scalp. He’ll then massage your shoulders, causing your head to drop down, your chin against your chest causing your spine to slightly stretch out and release the tension from being social.
After the bath, you'd do your skincare, he’d watch as you gently apply toner, serums and creams. Then you’d throw on his ratty tunic and a pair of oversized shorts. You’d sit your (fine) ass on the counter and pull his hands into your lap to apply creams on them. Because he insisted he wanted to take care of his hands more.
Once you two ended up in bed, you’d turn on the lap by your bedside and begin to read your novel. He would write in a notebook. You suggested he try journaling when he talked about his thoughts overcrowding his brain.
Eventually you two would settle down together, he would lay on his side, his arm around your waist pulling you to his chest. Your head on a pillow that holds both of your heads with his arm underneath it. He refused to let you sleep by the window because he wants to be able to protect you.
The window’s open, letting the cool night breeze in. The only sounds are your breathing and the drapes billowing.
You felt content in your husband's arms. Knowing he may be a grumpy introverted bat, but he’s yours. He loves you as yourself.
You've known Azriel before. He was a tiny little boy, and now he is here in your camp, looking like he is a God of Sex himself
4.9K words
Warnings: SMUT, p in v, course words
Author's Notes: Soo... I was a little inspired and listening a lot to Sabrina Carpenter. That's what came out. Hope you enjoyed it.
It would be a lie if you said you can get accustomed to living in an Illyrian Camp. Life there never gets easy, actually, it only gets worse. Worser if you are female.
There was some social understanding taking place for centuries in those camps: you would be respected only if you had a dick between your legs and you would be even more respected if you were a dick.
Males were the rulers, the warriors, the providers.
And females were males’ properties. First her father’s property and then her husband’s.
But there were rumors that some campsites were changing: females started training in some of them, learning how to protect themselves and to combat. Needless to say it was not happening where you live.
Being from one of the oldest camps meant it will be even more difficult to accept this change. Females in here still get her wings clipped.
You remember when they clipped yours, the memory is still vivid in your worst nightmares. It was your father who demanded it. You went out to wash the clothes, got unwarned by three big males. They dragged you to the stamp, your body and wings scraping in the ground, the local where they clipped all the females stank with the smell of blood, piss and dregs. You started trembling from crying the moment they got your hands tied to the small piece of wood chunk, it was so small that even being one of the smallest females in the camp, your body had to be too hunched over to stay in position. You felt their rough hands grab the talon of your wing with so much force your stomach twisted, and then you felt the coldness of the saw. You vomited the moment they started cutting just the right place that will forever take your ability to fly. The pain was so immense you passed out.
Today, your wings were healed, but you will never get to feel the wind against your face anymore. It had been centuries since that happened, but you would never forgive your father for that or the males who did you or all the other males who allow such a thing. That’s why you're here right now, between lots of other females while the High Lord speaks about the forbidden of clipping wings. Again.
He had already been here and talked about the same thing. The problem was that the centuries old males just refused to accept it and did it all hidden. Needless to say the High Lord found out, so now we will have a 24/7 watch dog.
And for your surprise, this watch dog was born in here, lived just in the house across from yours until the day you never got to see him anymore. But you remember him. He was a truly skinny little guy, with a paleness that broke out the pattern of Illyrian usual tanned skin, dishevelled black hair and a sulked face. His name, Azriel.
You can’t believe the Azriel you are seeing right now is the same one.
Tall and big. With broad shoulders and leathers marked with muscles, a posture so rigid it made your body shivered. His face was like a sculptry, perfect, a sharp jaw, combining with the fury in his eyes. Not a single black strand out of order in his hair. Is this the same guy?
You swear that little boy had shadows surrounding him just like this godsdammed fucking hot male has. But how could that Azriel from your past be this wetting panties Azriel?
His stoic face didn’t reveal his emotions, but you saw the moment his eyes scanned the crowd, the moment he swallowed dry after counting how many clipped females were there hearing their words and then his eyes locked yours and his brows furrowed. Could he have remembered you as well?
- - - - -
You were washing clothes by the river with the other females of your camp. There had been 3 days since the High Lords advertisement about Azriel being the new supervisor. There had been 3 days since none of the males tried to approach any of you in the river.
Usually, the laundry was a service for the single females, the reason why so many males hovered over the river. Not for a relationship, no, that was something the father arranged. They were just looking to get laid.
However, with Azriel here, they stayed at the training ring, not bothering any of you at your work. You couldn’t remember a day when you worked in such a peace. Well, until that female came down to talk to you.
Just like you, she was one of the oldest females that were still single. You guess that’s the reason she believes she is your friend. In reality, you could barely endure her voice.
“He is the High Lord’s spymaster, did you know it?” she was talking about Azriel while you were eager to try to ignore her talking. Azriel was watching you working, protecting you actually, you would not want him hearing you talking about him “They say he is unflagging in bed” you swear to the Mother she was not speaking in a low tone by being so near to him “They also say he has the biggest wingspan ever seen!"
That got your attention, you knew what it meant, everyone did. Just like everyone knew that the size matching was not a rumor, it was a real thing. Having Azriel now being a really good sight, nevertheless the fact he is indeed something to think about late at night when you’re alone, you didn’t have to know that he, above all that, had the biggest wingspan. You looked at him then.
He was already looking at the both of you.
Gods, is there somewhere you could hide yourself? Why the hell is this girl giggling after being caught talking about the size of his wings? Is she crazy? You bet she is, ‘cause now she is holding your arm while she is fixing her hair, looking directly at his eyes, whispering to you “Do you think I’m his type?"
You looked at her then. Skinny, long legs, a little more tanned than you, siren eyes and puffy lips. Than you looked at him and his glory, his biceps were so big you swear it was the size of your head, his chest was strong, probably an 8 pack, face shaved with a wild beauty, brows constantly neat making him look angry all the time. It also made you think if he could look downwards with that closed expression to a female while fucking her hard. You bet she could. And you bet he was into lean females, just like the one beside you.
You looked at her again. Than at you. You were smaller than the rest of the Illyrians, more curvy, you had more boobs and ass than the rest, which made almost all the clothes you wear look obscene, marking every part of your body. Obviously not the type of a high rank illyrian warrior.
“Yes, be you do” you answered, but didn't have the guts to look at Azriel anymore. Males had already told you how your body was out of proportions and how you outstanded between the other females, that’s the main reason for you still being single, they always pick the one who they think could get their sons with an even more “warrior perfect body”. The more leaner, the better. How could you stain a whole lineage by giving your short legs genes? What will that warrior do? Bite the others shin?
Azriel is now a Carynthian, the most feared warrior in Night Court, possibly one of the most feared in all Prythian. The females that got laid by him are probably the most beautiful ones to touch this ground ever, he would never look at someone like you.
“I hope you’re right, ‘cause I’ll go talk to him tonight by the bonfire” why the hell is she still talking to you?
The bonfire event occurs every week, where they light up lots of bonfires by the camp. Family and friends get together by it, sharing a single bonfire, lots of drinks and food. The bonfire you stay by is the one shared by this exactly single females working in the river. You couldn’t say you like this event, it was just one more place where males tried with all their effort to get laid for the night.
“Well, good luck then” you wished as you got the clothes, now clean, with you, heading straight to the place to hang them and dry. You swear you could still feel Azriel looking at your back.
- - - - -
The smell of roast pork was in the air while you walked to the ‘single ladies’ bonfire. Kids were running around playing with fake swords and adults were chatting and drinking. It was all a single cacophony. Illyrians can be pretty loud.
You found an empty space to seat by the bonfire and accepted the beer jug one of the girls gave to you. You were not a big fan of beer, but it was better than spending the night not talking to anyone. You were not friends with the other females, most of them keeping their distance, thinking you could, somehow, pass your “male repellent” thing. It wasn’t good seeing someone as old as you still not married or at least engaged. You could do nothing about that though.
As soon as you settled, your eyes automatically tried to find the Shadowsinger. Unfortunately he was nowhere to be seen. Neither was your “friend”. Guess you were right about his type.
You decided you could stay there ‘till the pork was served and at least two of the girls of your bonfire were taken. That way, they will not think you are trying to escape all this bullshit.
It didn’t take long for the females who work on the community kitchen to pass, bonfire by bonfire, offering a bowl with pork. You got yours and, somehow, got even more silent while eating. At least until someone came to sit by your side.
You already know who it was, didn’t even need to look at her to know she would start spelling the beans about how good Azriel is in bed and how she is such a lucky female. It seems he got her really tired once she didn’t start to talk yet, so you decided to go throw it first.
“So, biggest wingspan ever seen?” you asked, waiting for her to just answer and get off of it quickly before you could go back to your residence. Unlucky for you, she didn’t respond just yet, obliging you to look up for her.
That was the moment you prayed for one of the kids running to bump into you and lead you straight to the fire, ‘cause there was not the female looking at you. It was Azriel. Looking straight into your eyes just after you said about his wingspan.
“Sorry” you said, voice so low you thought he didn’t hear you “I thought it was…”
“Someone else?” he finished your apology and you couldn’t do any other thing than nodding. You could feel your face reddening as shame consumed you, but then he spoke again “You know, I remember you having a more sharp tongue. Not you getting cheeks flushed after talking to a male”
So he does remember you.
“Well, that was when you were a little boy afraid of his own shadow. Not this…” you responded, getting to see the little smirk in his lips as he encouraged you to finish your line “big brooding male, capable of scaring kids by your fates their parents tell before sleep time”
Azriel then laughed. Loudly. You couldn’t hold the small smile at that.
“And here I am thinking you changed, Y/N” so he does remember your name too. Great. “You still live in the same place?”
“Some of us don't get to go away without saying goodbye and get to be a high ranked warrior, who works directly for the High Lord” you respond while lowering your gaze again to your bowl “So, yes, I live in the same place. With the difference that now I don’t get to laugh about my tiny cute neighborhood"
He smiled again “Didn’t know you went rancorous about me going away”. You huffed, he laughed one more time. “I thought I'd gone out of my mind when I saw you in the crowd the day Rhys came to say I would watch you guys. Thought I wouldn’t find you here anymore and that scared me” you looked incredulously to him then “Than I was by the river trying to avoid inconvenient males approaching you working, and there you were again. With the incredible company of someone who is incapable of talking quietly even if their life depends on it” you couldn’t help and laughed at that.
“You heard it”
“Of course I did. One more minute and she would have started screaming out her lungs about another filthy thing about me” he truly looked outraged about how loud that girl can be “But there was a good thing about her being loud as a megaphone…”
Now that got your attention. What on Prithian could be good to have her talking so loudly? “And what would that be?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” you shook your head “I caught you on a lie!”
“What?” Now you were the outraged one “What did I lie about?”
“About her being my type”
You thought you misheard. He was joking, right?
But he was serious. Categorical.
“Well… do I need to apologize for assuming that?” Your head spinned. You wished your voice came out stronger than it did.
“No, no need to apologize. But I’m curious, why did you think that?” You looked at him than. Deep in the eyes, those eyes so beautiful and, at this moment, so full of something you couldn’t quite decipher what it was.
“She is the standard beauty in our society” His gaze got so intense into yours that you had to look down again “And male like you always have standard beauty as a type"
“Males like me?” you nodded “And what of male am I?”
Now that pissed you off. Is he going to play dumb around you or something? You gathered courage to look at him again “Males of High Society who knows pretty well what they can do to a female. Males who have females in a row to get laid by them. Males who know they could get any female he wants, so he would obviously choose the prettiest one. That’s the kind of male that are like you”
You needed to take a deep breath after vomiting all these words in his face. And he fucking smirked.
“What happened to the little boy you said I was?” Now he was provoking you. Awesome.
Was he also getting closer to you?
“I thought I also made it clear it was in the past” You were being stubborn at this point.
“I thought I also made it clear it was a lie” He replied. That fucking smirk still in his face “Would you like if I explicit exactly what my type is?”
You didn’t quite get to know exactly what led you to nod. But in an instant, you were both standing up, all the other females who were still gathered by the bonfire looked at you. Azriel took your small hand in his and led you toward the residences, you could feel the stares while you walked between the other bonfires.
For a split second you thought he was leading you to your house, but then he turned in another corner and you kept walking in silence. The streets were all silent either, just the sound of your steps echoing through the night. The moon and the stars illuminated your path and you took the chance to admire Azriel's features.
You were so engrossed at how beautiful he looked by the moonlight that you didn’t notice when you arrived at the house. You’ve never been there, but you could tell the building belongs to your High Lord. It was much more preserved than the other houses, alongside the elegance it has.
Azriel opened the door for you and entered just after. He looked at you with expectation in the eyes, maybe waiting to see if you were going to say something. But all those words you had the courage to spit it out just went away. Now all you could feel was your heart racing against your ribcage, so hard you got afraid azriel might hear it too.
Your eyes scanned the room, soft and clean. Fancy.
You felt out of space
“Don’t do that” he warned you in a more sharp tone he intended to, you could tell he felt bad for it the moment his eyes got bigger as soon as he realized how it sounded. But you didn’t get what he just said, were you doing something wrong? “You are thinking you don’t fit in here. Just as you did when you were by the lake”
You got confused with his words though.
“I saw the moment you looked at yourself after that female asked if you thought she was my type. I saw how your brows furrowed when you did it. And I didn’t like a bit” You looked at his eyes, he was truly acting like he didn’t like indeed “I didn’t like because you doubted you were the hottest female I have ever got my eyes into”
His words made you flush. Gods, where is your ability to respond when you most need it?
In the end you didn’t get to respond, ‘cause in no time his mouth crashed against yours. You got the feeling Azriel would be a hard kisser, but getting to know it for sure was a completely different thing.
His hands, marred with scars, found their way. One holding thigh around your waist and the other adding the perfect pression in your neck, a combination so fucking perfect you let out a moan. He released you then and you got to have a better look to some details: how his eye color had the perfect mix between hazel and green, or how his down lip was just slightly bigger than the upper one or even the small scars he had, one up at his cheek and the other right in the middle of his brow.
You didn’t get much time to absorb other details because his mouth was on yours again. His hands now made a new way and found comfort just below your ass and, with an impulse, he was holding you midair. His mouth didn’t let yours for a split second. He started walking to what you thought was his bedroom.
When he got to the bed, he still held and kissed you while lying down ‘till his big body was hovering over your small one. His right hand came to hold your jaw and made pressure to cease the kiss, you didn’t know if it was to prevent you or him from continuing kissing.
“I need to know if you want to continue this” He asked, worried about doing something that was not what you were looking for. You nodded. Not in a million time you would say no to this “Babe I need to hear you say it”
“You promise you would show me what your type is” You tried to tease him with his own words but the only thing you got to do was whisper. Thankfully that was enough for him and his mouth was on yours again.
Meanwhile the hand that hold you was still in your jaw – but now helping pressing you against him – his other one made it’s way to you panties. You were wearing a dress for the night, choosing that one because it was fresh once you were about to spend the night by the fire. His hand hovered over the cloth, playing with your pussy making you get more wet than you already were. Then you felt his fingers playing with the waistband before going in just the same moment his mouth let yours and went to give kisses on your neck.
Your stomach twisted and you let out a deep breath, Anticipation getting over your entire body. The moment his long finger made contact in your needed entrance you shivered, you felt his fingers playing with the wetness you were, going up and down, just teasing and never getting in. You didn’t let your thoughts lead to this way before, you met Azriel when he was young and remember clearly of the day he got his hands burned, the day he came to the camp with the High Lord his hands were pressed tight at his back and tonight you weren’t quite focused on seeing his scars while talking, but if you had paid attention to it, you were sure you would spend a good time thinking how it would be to feel the marred skin in your clit. Well, it was amazing. The texture of it made your legs shake,
“You already like this for me?” Somehow his voice got hoarser, dipper. Made you get wetter (if it was possible) “I know you want more, but I need to prepare you before I can fuck you senseless”
That was another thing that got in your head lately and Azriel was proving you were right. He likes to speak during sex, filthy things in a hoarse way. You now asked if he would swear either. You bet he does.
His index finger provoked your entrance, coming in slowly, making you feel each inch he took. Than came another finger, fighting for space.
“For the Cauldron Y/N, you are thigh” He started scissoring his fingers than, making you take another deep breath. You were feeling him all around you and that was amazing, but you already had started craving for more. So came the third finger and a moan escaped you.
He bent his fingers just enough to tuck the perfect spot inside you. When you got the feeling you could come with that, he took them out and you made a disapproval noise.
He laughed under his breath in the hottest way someone was allowed to do “Sorry to disappoint you when you were enjoying it so much. But you don’t get to come before I’m deep inside you”
You though this was the moment then. He would take his cloths off and fuck you the way wanted it and could come with him inside you. But instead of doing it, he got out of the bed, grabbed your ankles and pulled closer to the edge. Then he bent down the floor and you opened your mouth from the view of that ridiculous handsome male looking at you from that position looking like a hungry predator. His eyes got darker, there was sweat in his forehead and some strands glued to his forehead and he watched you just like you were his meal. He lowered his head and you felt the first slide of his tongue.
“Even sweeter than I imagined” You got the impression now that he was not talking to you, but admitting something it was only in his head.
Your moan got louder with each stroke. The loudest one being released the moment he invaded your pussy with the entirety of his tongue. In that moment you realised his nose was just long enough to reach your clit while he was deep sucking you.
Again, he didn’t let you come, taking distance from your aching spot while he licked his own lips, not letting any of your juices go wasted. He got up between your legs and took his shirt out, gracing you with an 8 pack (you knew it!) and tattoos that strangely gave you the urge to lick them all.
You could see the bulge in his pants, your hands darted to touch it, but before you could, you looked up at him searching for approval. He nodded once. All your palm was not enough to wrap all of it. You started undoing his belt and buttons, taking a second before finally bullying it from the strand of the pants and underwear. Your eyes almost went out it’s orbit with the sight before you.
Azriel was not just big, he was enormous. The biggest wingspan between all the Illyrians was real. Alongside, he was thick, with some veins around it (veins that started just a little higher from where the waistband usually gets, you bet those who get the chance to see him training shirtless can do nothing but imagine if it goes down. Yes, girls, it does!)
“I’m afraid this will not fit me” You said under your breath and once again he let that small laugh escape.
“That’s why I prepared you. But don’t worry, I’ll go slow and I would never hurt you, ok?” You nodded and he didn’t insist on your reassuring it out loud.
He grabbed your ankles again and let him put your legs on his chest. The tip of his head teased you and you gave a fuck about your concerning of him not fitting. You needed him right the fucking now.
Unfortunately, for you, he went slow. Too slow.
You could feel as he filled every inch of you, how he widened you bit by bit. He let a thick sound escape his throat, just like a howl. You swear it was the most erotic sound you ever heard.
You watched his concentrated scowl. You were right in one more thing about him. His black brows were knit together, eyes low watching as his cock invaded you, his skin was gleaming with sweat and he usually get to water his dry lips. You also got him biting his lips while his gaze was still focused on your bodies glued together.
When he started moving, you saw stars. In the beginning he was careful and you could feel your walls tightening around him, marveling at the sensation of him. When he was sure you were good and not aching from the enlarging, he became fucking harder.
You could hear his balls beating against you, a sound so erotic you thanked you were the only ones that could hear it. The bed was also adding to this intimate music of yours.
Your moans were constantly cutting off the moment he banged you again and again, robbing the air of your lungs, not letting you finish those indecent noises. Azriel however, was a mess of howling and coursing. He kept saying things while fucking you such as “This motherfucker perfect pussy” or “You are so good at taking my cock”. You tried smiling at those he compliments you by saying you were a good girl, but your smile always falls into an open mouth when he just presses that little perfect place inside you.
When you thought he would let you come, he spins you around and harshly gets you in a dog position. He doesn't wait to get inside you again and in this position you can feel him going even deeper. His hands come to your hair, doing a messy ponytail, which he pulls it harder while banging you like this.
You also now know that he likes big asses. Truly likes it. While keeping a hand in your hair, his other one kept squeezing it or beating it from time to time. And when you thought he got tired of it, he released your head, got his belt in a way you don’t know how he dit without stop fucking you, and bounded your hands behind your back.
Now with your face pressed hard on the mattress, water coming down your eyes from the intensity of it all. Azriel grabbed you ass with both hands with such a force you knew you would stay with the marks of his fingers and started rocking your body at the same time he fucked you. He pulled you even harder with each trust and when you thought you couldn’t get anything more, he slid one of his hands to rub your clit.
You came so hard your throat ached from your scream. Your pussy squirting all over the spymaster’s mattress, while you could fill him coming hard inside you.
Your mind was foggy after all of it, but you felt Azriel lifting you on his arms and leading to the bathroom. He bathed with you, but before he could get a towel to you, you heard him going to the bedroom again. He took some time and came back with one of his shirts to you.
Clean, dried and dressed. He carefully got you in his arms again and laid you on bed. You noticed the time he got while you waited at the shower was for changing the mattress. He laid just beside you and let you put your head on his chest.
You were still lazy from your hard coming, so you just enjoyed the silence and the gentle way Azriel was caressing you. He gave you a goodnight kiss before turning off the light.
During this intimate moment with Azriel you got to be right about lots of things about how he is in bed. But there was one you would never risked: Azriel, The Shadowsinger and Spymaster of the Nightcourt, owner of the biggest wingspan, likes to cuddle.
With all this news about the next books, I honestly just want to see more Feyre. I want to see her being powerful as a high lady and showing off her powers and just being her badass self, plus being a mother. She can be a mother and a powerful high lady at the same time.
I am just tired of seeing antis treat her like shit because they dont understand her or they've let terrible headcannons overtake actual canon. They constantly dismiss her and mischaracterize her.
She is so important to the foundation and future of these books.
Feyre Archeron x Rhysand
Feysand and their little ball of chaos, Nyx
Thinking about Feysand lying in bed in an early morning, with the sun peeking through the high windows. Soft light shining on the pair as they rest together. Embracing one another even when sleeping.
Feyre wakes up first, groaning as she opens her eyes and sees her sleeping partner next to her. She smiles softly, enamored with the sight. Her wonderful mate who usually has so much going on in his head, peaceful for a change.
As she cards her fingers through his hair, Rhysand starts to wake up. But before opening his eyes, he pulls Feyre closer to him with the arm that was already thrown around her. Kissing the crown of her head as he stretches slightly, not ready to face the world just yet.
They have a slow relaxing morning. Adoring each other with soft touches and lingering kisses. Adoration and love written in their eyes.
All that comes to an end when their little ball of chaos bursts through the door. Having always been a little restless even as soon as he wakes up.
Nyx springs to the bed where his parents lie in. And although the pair are a little surprised by the sudden appearance of their child, they smile. Attacking him in tickles and blowing raspberries into his round tummy. Making the youngest erupt in laughter.
They like their slow mornings.
But they wouldn’t change this for anything in the world.
Fandom: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Summary: A rewrite of Silver Flames that takes place 10 years after ACOWAR. Nesta has relocated to the Day Court and is content to have no further communication with the Night Court. A letter and quest for lost magical items pulls her back into the eyes of the Courts and enemies new and old.
Chapter Summery: Cassian and Nesta go into the Heart of the Library and explore their past. (Please check the trigger warning in the author's note for this chapter.)
I want to thank @xxvalkyriesxx for creating this wonderful banner for ACOFS. I have been so excited to show off her amazing work.
Friendly reminder for every shipper out there that there are still two novels in the spinoff trilogy (not counting the novella). Knowing that one of them will be Elain’s and hoping the Valkyries will have an important role in the other one are two wishes that can and should be able to coexist without getting accused of wanting Elain to be overshadowed.
Summary// The pressure from the advisors and members of the court for the two of you to produce an heir is high. It is all anyone can talk about and while you certainly enjoy the idea of having children, you don’t expect Eris to feel the same given his parental history. He has stayed mostly quiet on the subject until he catches you in the mirror with a pillow under your blouse, imagining what it would be like.
(I know this is out of order for the Kinktober fic but so many of you guys requested it so enjoy it, you dirty little readers. Also thanks so much for the anon who suggested subspace bc that was so much fun to write! ;))
You had been mated with Eris for five years now and it was like you were truly living for the first time. He was the center of your life, the ship in the middle of the ocean, the warm blanket you cuddled with at night. Life began and ended with him and you knew he felt the same way.
He spoiled you with anything you could ever want. Jewels, dresses, books, pets, anything your heart desired he would go find because he loved making you happy. You knew not every mated couple had such a good life, that sometimes fate was more than met the eye, but yours was truly meant to be.
Everything had been perfect in your lives…except for the last few months. The Autumn Court advisors had been prying into your private lives, pestering Eris on when he would produce an heir. It angered you every time it was brought up as they acted like it was your fault. As if you were the one who was refusing a child.
It couldn’t have been farther from the truth. You had wanted children with Eris since you first started courting, dreaming about the little red-headed babes running around your feet. Fae pregnancies were incredibly difficult on the body and were also rare, however, you had no fear.
But you could not say the same for your mate. Eris avoided the subject like the plague. He would shut down his advisors with a simple wave of his hand and a frown while also doing the same with you.
You knew some of it was his own fears of fatherhood given how he was raised with Beron but you had assured him many times that he was not his father. Eris is ten times the man Beron was but he couldn’t seem to understand that. It was one of his worst fears to turn out like him.
Eris was also terrified of something happening to you. He had heard of what almost happened to Feyre, albeit her situation was a little different. What if he lost you? He didn’t have some magical gift from the Cauldron to bring you back. You would be gone forever and he would either be left alone or with a child who killed his mate, their mother. How could he love someone that did that?
The last two weeks had been full of tension as one of Eris’s brother’s wives had fallen pregnant, announcing it in court with an evil smirk on his lips. He knew exactly what he was doing by making such a public spectacle and you had had to force a smile the rest of the evening as everyone stared at you in judgment.
In their heads, you had only one job to do that you were currently failing at. This entire situation was weighing heavily on your shoulders but you did not want to force Eris into something he did not want.
However, that didn’t mean you couldn’t wish for it still, did it? That you couldn’t desire it secretly in the quiet of your bedroom? Eris was supposed to be gone for the day on a hunting trip, the first he’s taken in a month, so no one should be seeking you out until nightfall.
Your eyes landed on a soft pillow atop your shared bed, biting down on the inside of your cheek as you walked quietly over and grabbed it. There was no real need for you to be quiet but you still felt as if you were doing something wrong. You went back to the mirror in the corner of your room and stood in front of it, positing yourself to the side.
With one hand you lifted up your skirts and used the other to stuff the pillow inside it until it was settled against your belly, making it pop and give a lumpy shape of roundness. It didn’t look like a typical pregnant belly but the feelings that ran through you were all the same.
Sadness, pining, joy, pain, it was a cocktail of emotions that made your head spin.
You began to imagine it as your real belly, of all the dresses you could have tailored and how Eris would kiss your stomach every morning and night. Would Eris like you like this? Would he be constantly wanting to touch you, rub you, or would he want nothing to do with you?
Minutes passed as you watched yourself in the mirror, rubbing the pillow as if it were real. You were so lost in your fantasy that you didn’t hear the heavy footsteps of your mate or the door opening.
“What are you doing?” His voice pierced through your imagination, making you jump and turn towards him.
“Eris, I-” You flounder over your words, cheeks heating up as he stares at you with furrowed brows. “I was just, I mean, Eris I’m sorry…”
“Is that a pillow?” You couldn’t tell if he was teasing you playfully or if he was genuinely upset. Either way, the embarrassment made you want to be swallowed by the floor. Quickly you yanked the pillow out from underneath your dress and held it behind your back, looking down at the floor.
“I know you don’t want kids. I know you don’t want to talk about it. I promise this isn’t a trick or anything I just wanted-” You explained, tears wetting your eyelashes as he came over to you and lifted your head up.
“What did you want, my lady?” Eris murmured, amber eyes softening at how upset you were. “You can tell me.”
“It’s nothing. I don’t want to pressure you into anything.”
“Y/N.” His voice was stern, knowing that wasn’t the truth.
“I just wanted to see what I would look like pregnant.” You whispered. “It was silly.”
“Do you want to be pregnant?” He asked you lowly, catching your eyes once more. “Is that what you want?”
You felt the words stuck in your throat as he stepped closer to you, caging you in his arms. When he found you thought that he was going to be angry or disappointed but this reaction was completely unexpected.
“My advisors have been hounding my back nonstop over this… predicament of ours.” Eris continued on, the corner of his lip turning upwards. “Day after day, night after night. I had been worried you weren’t ready, that you would be terrified, and yet here I catch you doing this.”
“I-” You tried to interrupt but quickly shut your mouth when he grabbed your hips roughly, turning you around so that your back was to his chest and you were staring at yourself in the mirror.
“You what? Hm?” He taunted, intertwining your hand with his and slowly dragging it down your body. Goosebumps rose on your skin as his smoldering eyes never left yours, his pupils blown wide with desire. “You want me to fill you up with my cum, little fox? To pound into you like a beast takes his bitch? To breed you?”
Eris loved to talk like this in the bedroom and you weren’t ashamed to admit that you also loved it. The control, the domination, of his words made you melt and want to please him. And with the words he was saying about breeding you…it was no surprise that your pussy was clenching in anticipation.
“I asked you a question, Y/N. I expect you to answer.” Eris reprimanded, his lips ghosting the shell of your ear as his other hand came to circle around your throat. “Is that what my lady commands of her lord? To fuck an heir into her?”
Whiplash was the only thing that you could describe as feeling with how things were turning out. It was like a flip had been switched in him but you were already too drunk on lust to question it, nodding your head and whimpering.
“Yes, yes, sir.” You answered, groaning when he untangled his hand from yours and squeezed your breasts through your dress. “I…I want you to fill me up.”
“Breed you. You want me to breed you.” He corrected, pinching your pebbled nipple which had you squirming. “Say it.”
You swallowed thickly and looked at him through the mirror.
“I want you to breed me, my lord.”
Eris grinned wickedly and turned you back towards him, wrapping your hair around his hand and pulling your neck back until it was almost at a ninety-degree angle.
“Well then, I suppose we better get started. Now.”
He was anything but gentle as he took the collar of your dress and ripped it with his bare hands, biceps flexing underneath the thin material of his shirt. You shivered as your body was exposed to the cool air.
“On your hands and knees.” He orders, smiling when you immediately followed his command. Normally you would mouth off and be a little brat, asking for punishment, but tonight it seemed you were ready to be his good little girl.
You turn to look behind you, feeling your wetness grow from the way he was devouring you with his eyes. Eris began to rid himself of his clothes, his cock standing at attention and ready to pump you full of his hot seed. He climbed behind you, his large hands running over the curve of your ass.
The bed dipped as he knelt on his knees, pushing the material of your panties to the side to unveil your dripping cunt. “I love how wet you get for me, Y/N,” Eris growled, licking his lips. “I’ve barely even touched you and you are already making a mess on these sheets.”
“I’m sorry, sir.” You whisper, not sure if he wanted you to apologize or not. He chuckled and ran a single finger down your pussy, collecting the juices and bringing them to his mouth.
“Look at my little fox using her manners.” He praised, moaning at the taste of you. “You want this badly don’t you?”
“Mhm.” You nod, taking in shaky breaths as you felt hot air on your lips. It was a wonder that your entire body wasn’t shaking with need at this point.
“Well what my lady wants, she gets.” Eris said before burying himself in your sex, his tongue flicking over your clit in quick swipes while his nose teased your hole. “Fuck you taste like heaven on my tongue.”
You could only whine in response, legs squeezing either side of his head as he feasted on you. He knew all the right speeds and ways to eat you out, how to make you sing in pleasure. Your arms were wobbling from the waves of pleasure he was giving you.
The room was filled with the filthy sounds of him slurping you up, one of his hands kneading your ass while the other stroked his cock. You could hear the wet sounds of him touching himself, making you even more delirious.
“I want you to cum on my tongue, little fox.” Eris said firmly, taking your entire clit into his mouth and sucking. The action had you crying out in ecstasy, feeling like you were floating above your body as your entire body shook.
He was always able to make you cum quickly because he took the time to know everything that made you tick, good and bad. Eris used it to his advantage many times and tonight was no different. You didn’t want this to be over so early but you also knew that tonight was special. This was going to be the first of many.
“Eris, ah!” You cried out, feeling that coil in you snap. He grunted in satisfaction when you started to mindlessly grind backward onto his face, your hands fisting the sheets. “It feels so good, sir.”
Every last drop of your cum went down his throat and his chin, his eyes closed in bliss. When you started to squirm from sensitivity he pulled back, holding the base of his cock and lining it up with your entrance.
“I’m going to breed you now,” Eris growled, not giving you a chance to recover as he thrust in until his balls slapped against your already tender clit. “And you are going to take it all, aren’t you?”
You didn’t answer fast enough, couldn’t answer, as you were still reeling from what he had just done. However, your mate had little patience and was quick to grab your hair once more, pulling it until you whined.
“Yes, Eris, yes,” You stuttered, enjoying the slight burn coming from your cunt as he stretched you out. “I’ll take it all, I’ll be good.”
His eyes were almost completely black as he gave you a feral grin, pulling almost all the way out before stuffing you full. Your tits were bouncing with each thrust, your hair still wrapped around his hand as he threw his head back in rapture.
“I know you will. I know you will.” He cooed, pulling his head back to watch his cock go in and out. The sheets were indeed a mess underneath you, a giant wet stain that was only going to grow as the night went on.
One of your hands went down and began to fiddle with your swollen clit, moaning loudly as he fucked you hard. Eris noticed and clicked his tongue, using the hand that had your hair and pushing your face into the mattress.
“Look at you, already trying to cum again.” Eris jeered, his grip bruising on your hips. “My lady is just a desperate little whore, isn’t she? A little whore who wants to be bred, to carry my children and do it over and over and over again.”
Your cries were muffled as he laughed darkly, feeling the familiar tingle of his own orgasm creeping up his spine. “But she’s such a pretty whore…” He purred, letting go of your head to brush the hair out of your face. Your entire body was being jolted by the force of his body, and your mascara was smudged, but you were too high on your own lust to care.
“Please, please, please, sir.” You babbled, bottom lip quivering. “I wanna cum, I want you to fill me up, please.”
He grunted and furrowed his brows, his long red hair sticking to his forehead from the sweat as he put all his concentration on your pussy. “You don’t get to cum right now, Y/N. I want you to hold it in for me.”
Eris’s thrusts grew sloppily as his balls tightened, picturing you with a swollen belly and heavy tits. It made his mouth water and he barely heard your pleas of mercy. You felt the first spurts shoot into you, his cum almost burning, and it made your entire cunt clench around his cock.
“Don’t you fucking cum.” He swore, groaning in pleasure as he emptied himself into your womb. You felt tears fall down your cheek, desperately craving that release. It was taking all the will of your body to not give in to what you wanted.
The sheer amount of cum was too much for you to contain and it leaked through the seal of your lips, dripping onto your legs and the bed. He gave two more thrusts before pulling out completely, admiring the way he left you gaping and gushing.
“You did so well, little fox.” Eris commended, pushing two thick fingers inside you and scooping out the mixture of his seed and your juices. He flipped you onto your back with one hand, your hair sprawling around you as he held those fingers over your mouth. “Suck.”
With tears staining your cheeks you followed his orders, chest rising and falling quickly as you swallowed it like you knew he wanted. Eris’s eyes turned tender upon seeing you, breaking the facade briefly to capture your lips in a gentle kiss. You were grateful for it even though you were still aching for him to let you cum.
After a minute he pulled away, noticing you fidgeting. “Does my little whore want something? Was that not enough for her?”
You nodded shyly, eyes widening when he laid down beside you and then patted his lap. His cock was already hard once more, glistening in the firelight. You climbed onto his lap, looking down at him.
“Well? What do you want?” He pressed, one of his hands resting on your hip while the other went to your cunt. Eris smirked as he pressed the pad of his thumb against your clit, enjoying the way you jumped. “You want to cum again? Greedy little girl.”
“I-” You tried to interject but shut your mouth when he suddenly lifted you up as if you weighed nothing, your hole hovering above the tip of his dick.
“It is greedy, Y/N.” He cut you off. “If you want to cum again you need to say it.”
The words were on the tip of your tongue. Eris loved to make you say these things, to make you degrade yourself. It made you feel embarrassed but you also knew you weren’t going to get what you wanted if you didn’t.
“I”m a greedy little girl.” You murmured, sucking in a sharp breath as he thrust up slowly. Inch by inch he filled you again, both of your cum making it easy for him to slide in. “I want to cum again, to be filled up by you, sir.”
“Ride me then, Y/N,” Eris ordered, letting you bottom out and giving you a hardy smack on your ass. “Take what you want. Be a good girl and fuck yourself on my cock. Make yourself cum.”
Some people would think that this was a blessing, that he was giving you what you wanted, but it was far from the truth. You did love riding him, loved watching him watch you, but he knew as well as you did that you needed him to make you cum. You couldn’t do it yourself.
You began to bounce on him, hoping this time you might be able to do it without him, and moaned as he hit that spot deep inside you. Your hips rolled and breasts swayed with each rise and fall of your body, his amber eyes never leaving your face.
“That’s it, my little whore, ride your lord’s cock.” He snickered, noticing the frustration building within you. “Show me how badly you want it.”
The need in your stomach was growing like an inferno. You were fucking yourself with all your strength, both of your hands resting on either side of his body as you whimpered through your teeth and closed your eyes in concentration.
“I want it, I want it, please sir.” You whined, your mind slowly slipping away from you as you seemed to stay on the edge of orgasm for hours. It was driving you insane. “Eris, Eris, I can’t. I need, I need-”
“What do you need, Y/N?” He cooed, smiling as your eyelashes fluttered and your hips finally slowed. His cock fell out of you and he knew you were getting into your subspace, something that made him feel tender and hungry at the same time. “Do you need my help?”
You barely had the coherency to nod, looking up at him with complete trust and want. “Please…”
He kissed your forehead and rolled you onto your back, lining up his cock and inching himself inside you once more. Both of his hands interlocked with yours and brought them above your head, keeping you still as he started a slow, hard rhythm.
You called out his name in ecstasy, enjoying the way his lips trailed over your neck and collarbone. “My sweet lady, so ready to take my cum and let me knock her up.” He breathed into your ear, pressing his forehead against yours.
“This is all you want, all you need, is my cock inside you.” Eris’s breaths were coming faster now, loving the way your walls fluttered around him. “You wanted to be bred and now you are. Your cunt is so full of me that you’ll be leaking for days, feeling it drip down your leg but it doesn’t matter because I’ll keep stuffing your pussy every night until this belly is round and tight.”
Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as you felt the crest of your orgasm coming up, your back arching off the bed as your throat burned from all the screaming you had been doing. All you could do now was whimper, your hands coming to circle around your neck as you babbled incoherently.
“Eris, please, I wanna, please,” You turned your head from side to side, eyebrows scrunching together. “Cum, let me, Gods, please!”
“Do it, Y/N.” Eris encouraged, moving his hips until he felt that squishy spot inside you that made you see double. “Cum for me, my little whore. Cum all over my cock, let that pretty pussy clench around me. Be a good girl.”
Everything around you went white and your ears began to ring as you came, your toes curling and back arching even further until you were sure you were going to snap in half. Your mouth was opened in a silent scream, letting your body succumb to everything your mate was giving to you.
The sight of you coming undone was enough for Eris to follow behind you, his mouth covering yours as he held himself still. It made his balls ache from how hard he was cumming, cursing loudly as he pulled away to bury himself into the crook of your neck.
“Take it, Y/N, fucking take it.” He growled into your neck. “Gods, you are so fucking tight on my cock.”
It took the both of you several minutes to catch your breath, Eris’s dick softening inside you as you struggled to come back to reality. He knew that this was rougher than normal, without any breaks, and he had probably pushed you to your limit.
But he had no regrets. And neither did you.
You barely registered when he scooped you up and nuzzled you close to his chest, whispering sweet nothings as he carried you over to the bathroom. Eris knew he needed to clean you before you went to bed and while he was waiting for the bath to fill, he couldn’t stop himself from staring at your stomach and wondering if it stuck.
Either way, you two would definitely be doing this again.
