#affirmative consent

[thehyperspacesystem]

I just learned about this

and it blew my mind.

I have tended to have sex when I actually wanted to cuddle because it was expected and things like that. Sometimes I ended up enjoying it anyway.

But I am often not clear in my mind about what I actually want.

This is called the wheel of consent if you want to look it up.

If you have a partner you can try it with clothed non-sexual touching so that you can get a sense of what the 4 quadrants feel like.

[odettecarotte]

Two book pairings I have enjoyed recently:

Britney Spears, The Woman in Me, followed by the chapter on Hysterical (Histrionic) Psychologies in Nancy McWilliams's classic Psychoanalytic Diagnosis: Understanding Personality Structure in the Clinical Process, 2nd edition.

Two wildly different takes on consent, both life-changing: Betty Martin will teach you how to feel consent in your body with The Art of Receiving and Giving: The Wheel of Consent and Avgi Saketopoulou will fuck up all that you didn't want to know about consent with Sexuality Beyond Consent: Risk, Race, Traumatophilia.

I will be quote-blogging these for my own pleasure, edification and future reference, and maybe yours as well!

For my thoughts on these and other subjects, look at the #mywriting tag.

[onlypositiveaffirmations]

https://positiveaffirmationscenter.com/

🌟 Embrace the flow of happiness! 🌟 Let the soothing colors of joy wash over you, lighting up every corner of your being. Remember, happiness is not just a destination, it's a journey we choose every day. Allow yourself to bask in the warmth of gratitude and the glow of positivity. 🌺

[butterflikisses]

[newsmutproject]

Because it centers on collaboration, a performance model better fits the conventional feminist wisdom that consent is not the absence of “no,” but affirmative participation. Who picks up a guitar and jams with a bassist who just stands there? Who dances with a partner who is just standing and staring? In the absence of affirmative participation, there is no collaboration.

Thomas Macaulay Miller, “Toward a Performance Model of Sex”, in Yes Means Yes

[thefeministherald]

Middle schools enter a new era in sex ed — teaching 13-year-olds about consent

Propelled by the #MeToo movement, a growing number of states are mandating lessons on consent in schools.

Huddled around a table in their second-period health class, the seventh graders debated the scenario in a lesson about consent.

It involved a story about a boy named Jack and a girl named Brenda. Jack is helping Brenda with her Spanish homework in the library. Suddenly, Jack starts kissing her. Brenda likes Jack, but she is worried about being caught. “Someone might see us,” she whispers to him. “So be quiet,” Jack responds.

The students at this suburban Maryland middle school were stumped.

“I don’t know if that’s consent or not,” a girl at the table said.

“That’s not consent,” replied a boy next to her, nibbling on the strings of his Nintendo 64 hoodie. “She never said ‘Okay, let’s do it.’ ”

[thelovelyone567]

Netflix has a really disturbing rape scene that occurs on the show “Sick Note” where a disabled character who is unable to consent to anything receives a handjob from their mistress. It’s played off like it’s not a big deal a police officer literally walks in and acts like that women did nothing wrong. Being sexual with disabled people who can’t advocate for themselves or move is rephrensible.

[teenagedirtbagbaby87-blog]

Things South Park Has Taught Me

Kim Kardashian is a hobbit.

You'll lose the girl of your dreams to a rich blonde who speaks about the revolution

Satan is a raging homosexual

It's okay to trick a kid into eating his parents-if he tricked you into gluing his pubes to your face.

If you want to touch your hypothetical boyfriend's penis, you can't just go grabbing for it

Asains are the ones who decide who is and isn't gay