#agingphangirl

[dannierights]

i just listened to the phancast (which HOW did i not know this existed ???) and it filled the lil hiatus shaped hole in my heart, im so glad it exists, id been thinking for a while how cool something like that would be and then i discovered this! keep doing what you’re doing gang !!!

[jestbeeextras]

Unfinished: enemies to lovers YouTuber au

Originally written: 22 June 2018

This was my attempt during fedij 2018 at writing enemies to lovers YouTuber AU because I was reading a lot of Drarry and i wanted that whole "i hate you but i really love you" thing. but I realised that what I was writing was too close to Ships. I might like to revisit the idea one day, but I need a bit more distance from Ships so as not to evoke the same kind of feeling

---

It is a perfectly lovely evening. The pub is kind of crowded, which he never likes, but he hasn't seen Louise in ages so it's nice to catch up with her. YouTube events were always good for that kind of thing, when for a few days they could leave their actual lives behind.

It's the first night of the event, and they're gathered in a pub down the road from the hotel they're all staying in for some kick-off drink. He's had a full half hour of undivided Louise attention, asking about Darcy and leaning across the table to talk to a number of the other YouTubers gathered there too.

He's had about three drinks and he is feeling cheerful and loose and carefree in a way that he hasn't in a while. Which is why is makes it all the worse to look up and find the door opening on someone he really didn't want to see.

"Oh no," he says.

Louise follows his line of vision to where Dan Howell is entering the pub and making eye contact with someone in their group, waving a bit. She looks back at Phil with a frown.

"Philip," she scolds, "not this again."

"He's just so irritating," Phil insists.

"Is this about what happened last time? Because he really was just trying to be nice."

Phil had forgotten about last time, but he feels a huge rush of prickly anger up the back of his neck now he remembers.

"It's not that," Phil shakes his head, "I just don't like him, okay?"

"Just..." Louise sighs, like she's been through this a million times and is this close to giving up. She sort of has. "Give him a chance."

"No promises."

"Then, be civil?"

"I don't get why you're friends with him," Phil says.

Louise is just nice to everyone, is why. She's too nice most of the time and people like Dan Howell walk all over her.

"I don't get why you're not," she says, "don't you think it's gone on for long enough now? Can you even remember how it started?"

"I can remember."

"Well I can't."

It had started small. It wasn't one thing in particular, just the way that Dan Howell had come out of nowhere, tall and British and a bit nerdy. He even had the audacity to wear his hair in a fringe over his forehead the same as Phil.

It was pathetic really.

And sure, now Phil sounded like a bitter has-been mad with the younger model for stepping on his branding. But Phil had tried, in the beginning, to be nice to him. But Dan had ignored him. At YouTube gatherings and other social occasions they happened ot be at, Dan stayed clear out of Phil's way and barely said two words to him.

Then he'd started mentioning him in videos. Talking about how Phil was an 'influence' of his and how much he admired him. It was vapid and shallow and completely untrue. Phil didn't have time for it.

Phil hadn't shaded him or anything, he really hadn't intended the video he made after Dan's video to get so much traction and all he'd done was make a throwaway comment about YouTube culture and the stealing of ideas, but fans had taken it to mean he was talking about Dan and well... it was kind of  just accepted fact at this point that Dan and Phil had drama.

Nowhere near as sensational as people on Twitter would imply it, but there was some basis to it.

Phil just shrugs at Louise and doesn't have time to say much more before Dan is sidling up to their table.

"Hi Lou," he says.

Phil picks up his drink and sips it, avoiding eye contact entirely. He could get up of course, find someone else to go talk to, but he refuses to let Dan Howell drive him out of his seat.

Thankfully, PJ wanders over at the minutes to sit down on the other side of him, Chris trailing behind him.

"Hey Lou," he says fleetingly, before hitching a leg up on the bench they're sat on and facing Phil. "Settle an argument, Phil."

And then PJ and Chris bicker in front of him for long enough that he forgets Dan Howell is even there.

It isn't until they've gone, and he turns back to talk to a shifting Louise that he remembers.

"I've got to get going," Louise says, "you boys play nice."

And then she pats Phil on the cheek a little too hard and is out of her seat. Phil tries a little noise of protest as she leaves, but it's no use.

Dan is sat a little further along on the bench and he's got a drink in his hand that's barely touched at all.

Phil clears his throat, maybe a little too loudly, and contemplates how much he cares about staying in his seat. Suddenly keeping it, when it might mean making polite conversation with Daniel Howell of all people, doesn't seem worth it.

He drums his fingers on the table, once or twice, and then rises to his feet.

"Am I that bad?" Dan asks.

"Sorry?"

Phil pauses, half out from behind the table, one foot in the aisle between their table and the next.

"You can't even bear to spend like, five minutes in my company. Am I that bad?"

Phil fights an urge to roll his eyes. Because of course Dan is making this all about him, and of course he has no idea why Phil wouldn't want to spend any time with him.

"I just need to go and see someone actually," Phil says, because starting a fight isn't on the agenda tonight. "It isn't all about you."

Oops.

"Sure."

Dan looks away from him, picking up his glass and taking a sip. Phil seethes, Dan's biting sarcasm is so apparent that it takes everything within him not to turn right back around and tell Dan that yes, it is about him. Him and his arrogance and his irritating little smile. Him and his stupid hair and that perfect dimple.

Shit.

"Think what you want," Phil says instead, "But I need to go."

Dan looks like he might have something more to say but Phil doesn't give him a chance. He stalks towards the door of the pub, angry and disgruntled at just how infuriating Dan is. He's annoyed at Dan, at Louise for leaving, and at himself for allowing Dan to rile him up so much.

"You leaving?" PJ says, catching him at the door.

"Yeah," Phil shrugs, trying to seem nonchalant even though he can feel hot anger creeping up the back of his neck.

"Oh come on, Phil," Chris says, sidling up alongside PJ and slinging and arm around both of them. "Stay for one more."

"I really have to go," Phil insists. "I've got a busy day tomorrow."

Chris gives a too-loud laugh like he really doesn't believe him. Chris is always far too excessive, loud and extroverted in a way Phil will never be. Phil can't help looking over to see what Dan might have made of that but he's not paying attention. Instead, he's looking at his phone with a scowl and not talking to anyone at all.

PJ side eye's him across Chris's front and then hooks his head over to see what Phil is looking at.

"Sure," he says, turning back with an amused expression on his face. Most likely because he has no reason to believe Phil at all considering they have a similar schedule all weekend.

"I do," Phil insists anyway.

"What?" Chris says, missing the thread of the conversation entirely in favor of looking over in Dan's direction too. "Dan Howell?"

Once again Chris is far too loud and Phil pushes at him, palm flat to his chest, sending him stumbling back half a step. "Fucks sake, Chris."

Chris is just laughing as Dan looks up from his phone. His brows twitch in to an even deeper scowl in their direction. Phil grabs Chris by the shoulder and turns them around so they're no longer looking at him.

"You need to get over this Dan Howell thing," PJ says.

"Ooo, what Dan Howell thing?" Chris asks in sing-song.

"Nothing," Phil spits through gritted teeth.

"Does our Phil have a crush?" Chris asks.

He really is fucking oblivious sometimes.

"No. Definitely not."

PJ shakes his head. "I don't know, Phil. You are kinda obsessed with him."

"I'm not obsessed," Phil says. "I <i>dislike</i> him."

"No reason you can't fuck him," Chris shrugs.

Just how many drinks has he had, anyway?

PJ shoots him a bit of a pitying look and jabs Chris in the ribs with a pointed elbow.

"Leave off," Phil says, "that's horrific."

"Not even a hate fuck?" Chris asks, "I love a hate fuck. They're so… bitey."

Phil pauses, raising his eyebrows in Chris's direction wondering if he has any shame at all. Probably not, is the answer, but at least PJ seems like he's on Phil's side.

"Ignore him," PJ says.

"Who, Chris? Or Dan?"

PJ shrugs, "Both, I guess."

Phil shakes his head and looks longingly at the door.

"Nah," he says, "I'm gunna head out."

"Alright," PJ says, "We'll see you in the morning?"

Phil just nods and raises a hand to wave at them. This isn't how he'd thought the first night of this trip would go. He'd been excited to be in Florida and to be at this event with all the people that he liked. Now he's just mad and disappointed and it's all Dan Howell's fault.

He just hopes that's the last he sees of him this weekend.

---

If you like this, and are so inclined, you have my permission to finish it, remix it, make it your own. I'd love to see what you do with it.

[insectbah]

Wait- does that mean your birthday is today?!?! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

It is! and thank you! I wasn’t going to say anything on tumblr but I woke up to this ask :)

[danfanciesphil]

Omg! I loved your new fic and then I was rewatching pinof 9 and Dan says "this is the worst imaginable scenario, Phil giving someone a tattoo without them being able to see what a happening" and in my head (because I was at work) I thought 'boy Dan do I have a fic rec for you!' Anyway. The fic was great, you're great ily bye <3

oh jane you beaut thank you!!! and oh my GOD that’s so hilarious, how stunningly appropriate lmao. ily!!! you’re amazing xxxxxx

[templeofshame]

In case one playlist wasn’t self-indulgent enough, here’s one for Ships That Pass in the Night by @agingphangirl. Even though she did her own playlist for it. I just like making playlists, ok?

[phancola]

Mostly Phil is just jealous of the way Dan seems to be perfectly at ease with the idea of kissing Anthony, but wouldn't consider it with Phil.

[jestbee]

Ships that pass in the night masterpost

Tags: Alternate Timeline, AU, Slow burn, strangers to friends, friends to lovers Words: 44980 [WIP] Summary: Dan and Phil are YouTubers. The catch? They've never met, and Phil doesn't want them to.

[AO3 Link]

[Chapter One] [Chapter Two] [Chapter Three] [Chapter Four] [Chapter Five] [Chapter Six] [Chapter Seven] [Chapter Eight] [Chapter Nine] [Chapter Ten] [Chapter Eleven] [Chapter Twelve][Chapter Thirteen][Chapter Fourteen][Chapter Fifteen][Chapter Sixteen]

[agust2]

agingphangirl replied to your post: just imagined phil uploading a vid to announce...

I have been imagining this is the project thing they’ve been working on as well tbh I mean probably not but the idea makes me happy

yeah it would be so good too! considering phil’d have so much more creative experience now. just thinking abt this makes me feel Things