That one time Deadpool smashed Spiderman’s window...
The Amazing Spiderman; @alwaysonafieldtrip
Friendly Neighbourhood Pool Guy; Yours truly
Wade had spent a great deal of time trying to figure out the best way to reach Spiderman. He was one of his favourite superheroes, and that’s why he found himself outside his house, late at night. He had a sheet of paper and crayons, and he’d drawn Spiderman up in one corner. The friendly neighbourhood hero was upside down, holding onto his web. Opposite, in the lower corner, he had drawn himself with heart eyes. In the blank space in the middle, he’d written “Our suits are red, bruises are blue, you’re fucking amazing! sign. Deadpool,” along with his phone number. He wrapped the paper around the rock and threw it through Peter’s window – listening to the wonderful noise of glass shattering – before he had Dopinder drive him back to Big Al’s.
What follows is the text messages that were exchanged between the two;
Peter: Erm, hello?
Wade: Hi! Who this?
Peter: Peter Parker
You happen to throw your number in my room?
Wade: That`s a relief! Note to self: I should stop leaving my number at bathroom stalls.
I did yeah. Did I hit anyone? Break your window?
At least make your spidersenses tingle?
Peter: You broke the window dude. My aunt is going to kill me! Wait...
Who are you actually? Is Deadpool a made up name?
Wade: I'll throw in some money so you can fix it?
How rude of me. Hi. I'm Deadpool. Secret identities and all that.
Peter: No! No don't throw anything in here anymore
Wade: I'm your friendly neighbourhood pool guy.
Bad reference Wade.
*gasps* Oops!
My aim is terrific, I can throw at the already broken window. You sure?
Okay I'll just leave an envelope with money in your mailbox. Who do I address it to? Spiderman?
Peter: Yeah, yeah I'm sure!
No!! God no
Just Peter is fine
Wade: Okay, Just Peter.
Peter: How... how do you even know who I am?
Wade: *takes a picture of the envelope stuffed full with money and "Just Peter" written on the front*
Would you believe me if I said it's through a mutual friend?
Peter: *looks at the picture* really dude? *sighs*
Mr. Stark?
Don't tell me it was Ned! He isn't supposed to tell anyone about me.
Wade: The least I can do is pay up. Don't want our friendly neighbourhood Spiderman stop protecting the neighbourhood. That'd be awful.
Uhm. Yeah sure. It was Mr. Stark.
Because you haven't met a Stan Lee, right? Right. How could you.
No it is totally our mutual friend Tony Stark.
Peter: You've clearly been stalking me or something to know all this.
Wade: You don't know anything about my rejection letter to join the Avengers?
Okay. I admit.
I've been stalking you.
We're suit brothers and that web thing you do is friggin /amazing/.
Peter: No... no I don't. I - you know - I don't get - really? You really think it's cool?
Wade: YES!
I mean. Of course. It would be cooler if it was more lethal. I like my bad guys bad - and dead - after all.
Peter: Oh I - I don't kill though.
Wade: Is it an age thing? I bet it's an age thing.
This could become a problem.
Peter: No, it's not an age thing, I prefer not to kill someone. It would make me the same like them.
Wade: So.... you`re saying I'm a bad guy?
*shrug* I can live with that.
Moving on.
*takes a picture of his hand dropping the envelope with the money into Peter's mailbox* There you go. Should be enough to fix the window and then some.
Peter: A problem for what? Look, deadpool was it right? Apart from the drawing you threw in my room and your number on there, what is it that you want from me? Help?*looks at the picture* thanks....
Wade: A problem for team morale. We'll most likely be conflicting parts. How will you react when I slug or decapitate the bad guys?
Peter: Am I in your team?
Wade: Obviously.
"Not Avengers, but better" I thought we'd call ourselves.
"Friendly neighbourhood spider and Deadpool"
Peter: Quite a long name isn't it?
Wade: Look – it’s a work in progress...
Peter: Does Mr. Stark know that I am in your team?
Wade: How about your homework is to find a team name for us?
Gosh, Just Peter. Does Mr. Stark need to know /everything/?
Isn't he busy with his half gods and old war heroes anyway?
Nevermind. If it's that big a deal, I'll send him a letter.
Peter: Yeah he kind of does. If I blow things now I can forget to be a part of the Avengers.
Wade: Letter it is!
Peter: Wait with the letter, I'll just call him.
Wade: That's a terrible idea
But sure.
Peter: Why?
Wade: He'll be thrilled.
Tell him that I said hello.
Peter: Mr. Stark doesn't know anything about you knowing me is it?
Wade: Tell him that I'll take care of you.
And uhm. That I won't do anything to compromise your moral, because heaven forbid we get Spiderman past PG-13.
What? Not until you tell him, he does.
Peter: I am not a kid anymore you know. I can take care of myself.
Wade: Sure. That's what they all say.
There's this kid called Firefist -
- nevermind.
Peter: Not all of them can stop a car from hitting a bus barehanded you know. So I am not like the others.
Firefist?
Wade: If things needs to be Tony Stark approved - you should definitely call him. (This is why we never get crossovers!) He knows me. I know you. You're getting to know me. I know him. It's all good.
Yeah. He was this abused kid with mutant powers that me and my X-Force stopped from becoming a psychopathic killer. Hey! I guess I don't kill ALL the bad guys.
Peter: X-force? That's the rest of your team then?
Wade: That's my other team. Yes.
In this team, there`s just you and me. And Dopinder. And maybe Daredevil.
Peter: Who's Dopinder?
I heard about Daredevil though.
Wade: Dopinder is my get-away-car/taxi driver. Not all of us can swing from buildings!
Did you call Mr. Stark yet?
Peter: I am still using busses and trains and other stuff to get to school you know....
I did, but he doesn't answer. He's probably busy
Wade: We're going with my letter plan then? Sweet.
*blinks* Wait, woah - hold up.
You still go to school?
Peter: Yeah of course I still go to school.
What did you expect?
Wade wrote, but didn’t send: That after Toby McQuire and Andrew Garfield you’d have grown up. *massive backspace, Wade*
Wade: For you to go to bed early!
Peter: .... dude
Wade: Where's your sense of responsibility?
Do you have a curfew?
Peter: What?! Dude really.... I am not being Spiderman the whole day. Just when I get the chance to be him. Which is after school and when I tell my aunt I'm going to bed.
I don't have a curfew
Wade: When do you sleep? This is concerning.
Peter: And I am responsible
Wade: Pfft.
Peter: When I get back from patrolling. Why - why am I actually defending myself to you? I don't even know who you are apart from your made up name and the name Wade slipping out.
Wade: *Wade took a picture of the letter he had crafted, in crayon and sent it to Peter. It read; "Dear Mr. Stark. I'm teaming up with Spiderman. He thought you should know. Sign. Wade. P.S I promise not to keep him up too late on school nights. P.P.S When will you let me join the Avengers?"*
Wade: Kid, I'm Deadpool. I kill bad guys. It brings me joy. I wear a red suit - like you. My favourite weapons are guns and katanas. I like chimichangas and fluffy unicorns.
I'd take you to a movie or a Starbucks - actually that's not a bad idea.
Peter: *looking at the picture. I really can't believe this guy. But... you know... maybe on time teaming up can't hurt*
Wade: How about we meet up at a Starbucks tomorrow and figure this out?
Peter: Does anyone know you are Deadpool or do you keep it a secret?
Wade: A part from Ryan Reynolds and Stan Lee?
I mean. Yes! No.
Peter: Right, I probably be able to get to one after school.
Around 4'ish
Wade: People know OF Deadpool. Some people know that Wade Wilson is connected to Deadpool. Not that many have lived to tell the tale. Oh well.
Okay. Mid town. In costume. On the roof, right?
Peter: Right
Wade: If I'm late it's because it will take me a while to go up all the stairs on the firescape.
I'll be the one in the red suit.
Now do the responsible thing, Just Peter; go to bed. I'll guard the neighbourhood while you sleep.
Peter: Okay.... I guess....
Wade: And do your homework! You have ONE job. Figure out our team name. No pressure.
I'll leave you alone now. Oh, and you might want to get that money out of your mailbox before Auntie May finds them.
Nighty night. Don't let the bed bugs bite. *wink*
“What...look kid just because I gave you access to my tower doesn’t mean you get to one: raid the snack bar, and two: bleed all over the floor. At least let me know when you drop in so I don’t come home to a dead teenager in my living room.”
He’s not as mad as he sounds, of course, but he has to draw the line somewhere. Oh how the Tony from even three years ago would cringe to see him playing the role of adult for once.
Wanda looked over to see the youngest of their cohort, Peter, sat by himself and wrapped in a blanket. It had been a stressful day, a long one and he must have been a little shaken. He looked like he’d seen a ghost and hadn’t slept in days. She walked over and sat down beside him, beginning to pry her boots off. “Are you okay?” She asked. “Do you want to borrow my phone and call your aunt?” She suggested.
[starter call: tony stark for @alwaysonafieldtrip]
Tony waited a beat or two as if he were trying to digest the information. In the end, he still had the wildly confused look on his face (could it get stuck like that? nah, it couldn’t get stuck like that!). He took a deep breath and leaned forward. “You want to run that by me again, Pete.”
The trickster gave the teen a small glance. “Are you saying you don’t have any?” That was sad. Especially for a child. Children should have friends. “I know how that feels.”
