#amalgverse

[donnatroyprincessofthemyscira]

[kurtty-drabbles]

11. “you’re so tiny, baby” (Amalgam!verse)

@djinmer4 @dannybagpipesarecalling @bamfoftheundead @discordsworld

N/A: Again, Columbian is a master assassin here. Tone down the short jokes Ryder.

People have a fascination with heights that it will remain a mystery to one certain humorist whose body always ended up in the typical short jokes and can´t see the point of those plays as she´s hyper-aware of her own height.

People on her set often make a quip or two about her being short, but, no one is more aggravating than Kurt Ryder who seems to realize that Kitty Pryde, his beloved girlfriend, is too tiny to reach the second shelve of anything.

"Baby, you´re so tiny" Kurt speaks with an adoring tone as Kitty sighs and gives up taking whatever she was interested in the second shelve and before Kurt Ryder could say anything (maybe even be smug about with his offer to get what she wants on the second shelve) Kitty swiftly kick his elbow (not hard enough to cause any damage) causing the man to lose his balance and Kitty catch him as she held his right hand.

"Kurt, I can kick your ass in less than 2 seconds"

"I know and I love you so much"

The short jokes are still being made by Kurt but to a less degree. And things that Kitty need are never again put on the second shelve.

[kurtty-drabbles]

Sunday Morning After by Amanda Marshall (Amalgam!verse)

@djinmer4 @dannybagpipesarecalling @discordsworld @bamfoftheundead

N/A: Ok, this song goes well with that fanart of Harley totally hangover.

When you hit such level of success is ok to celebrate as the Sketch TV is a popular show, but, as the Misfit and Oswald Cobblestone found out, the Misfit is either go big or go home, so the arty in the Penguin´s bar was intense. Polaris and Kitty drink the finest beer the bar has to offer, Blink and Warpath aren´t ashamed of making out, Chamber did show his tattoos and scars to everyone that wanted to look (everyone, really) and the party was one experience of a lifetime.

However, a wild night often gives birth to a hangover morning and Kitty is feeling this on her own skin. Winced as her cellphone ring loudly and ignore the fact her cellphone is in the workbench, even though, Kitty Pryde has no workbench. “Hello?”

“Kitty, where the fuck are you?” Lorna´s tone is worried and she even informs how she was searching for Kitty for the entire day. “Wait, wait. Day? What´s time is now?” Kitty asked nursing the headache by doing a massage.

“3 of afternoon” Lorna explained and this really jolts Kitty into action. And now she looks around to see where she truly is and yes, she is really not in her place. “Oh I´m fine, Lorna, really, I did drink more than I should, yes, yes. I know. Sorry, No Madame, won´t do that again. Yep. I can meet you there” Kitty states and after a mini-rant Lorna sigh and asks for Kitty to hurry up.

As the call is over. Kitty looks around and makes one sane question. “So, why am I here again?” Kitty is fixing her dress and notices she once again is here. And here is translate to Ryder´s couch.

This time I´m here as Columbina, so, better act right.

“WHERE AM I? why am I here? Who are you?” Kitty asked 3 question consecutive and Ryder appears with a glass of water and an amused expression.

“You´re in my house, I found you passed out in the bar and I couldn´t find your friends, a big brawl happened and I take you here, no, I didn´t know where you lived and I´m Kurt Ryder, remember? We see each other for a year now” Kurt replies amused still.

“Brawl? Oh right, I remember. Hi, Kurt” she said now more relaxed. “You could have warned my sister”

“I did, but, I think she didn´t believe me hence why she was ranting with you” and adds “she was being loud, hey, I get it, when Rogue goes to her first big party I was just like that” Kurt explains and this seems to tie all her questions.

Now, Kurt has a question. “How are you?” is the first thing he is thinking once the situation is clear.

“Urgh, I´ll never drink again” she promised and Kurt gives her a glass of water saying she needs to hydrate. As Kitty drinks the water knowing and trusting Kurt Ryder to do so because otherwise, drink what a random stranger offers to you is stupid. “I was there to celebrate my success in my show and urgh, never will drink again.”

Kurt chuckles at that and offer some of Rogue´s old clothes (“she does not know how to do laundry, just like me, but, I have an amazing laundry system now”) as Kitty´s dress is a bit dirty and while Kitty wants to say no, there´s something odd in being almost half-naked in front of such playboy like Kurt Ryder and he be more concern with the dress than with Kitty´s body. So, she accepts, but, will take the dress.

(There´s too much intimacy here. Using his shower is a new step for Kitty and she is not ready for this yet)

Rogue still owns an old green dress that is a bit too big for Kitty´s petite form, of course, Rogue and Kitty have different bodies types, however, the dress won´t fall apart and s enough to let Kitty take a taxi to her home safely.

“Hey, were you in the Penguin´s club last night?” Kitty asked still fighting the hangover. And Kurt nods and elaborate his answer.

“We did dance together in the bar, but, you were really drunk” Kitty sighs looking down and muttering something about never going to drink again “yes, we did dance, you´re not the graceful dancer in that state, but, I like a dance with you. I like to have fun with you” there´s sincerity in her tone that makes Kitty blush.

“And I was too drunk to remember most of all, but, I remember you and how you were speaking in German…Oh right, it was that music. That I remember” Kitty confessed in a low tone as Kurt Ryder is gazing loving at her eyes.

“And did you remember anything else?”

“Oh, of course, some dude passes his hand on my butt and his buddies applaud him as well catcalling me and called me hot stuff…then I fight them” she resume the situation easily and Kurt blinks and explain what happened.

“Well, yes, you fought 10 thugs and defeat all of them easily. You broke their noses, arms, eyes and didn´t even break a sweat” Kurt said impressed.

“You think I´m a bad woman now?”

“Far from that. Beating up perverts is really hot”

Kitty chuckles at this admission. And while Kurt is happy she didn´t catch on Kurt did change to Nightcreeper only to see Kitty beat up 10 men without break a sweat. Nightcreeper and Kurt Ryder were completely aroused by that.

[kurtty-drabbles]

♤ for my muse to help yours undress (Amalgam!verse)

@djinmer4 @dannybagpipesarecalling @discordsworld @bamfoftheundead

N/A: Comedian Kitty and Kurt Ryder. 

Her corset 

The show was a great success and for that, Kitty Pryde is thankful, but, this episode is already getting hate from parents because of some risky jokes they made and of course, by what Kitty is wearing. A sexy corset that was used in her Harlequina´s jokes.

The name itself warns people that the jokes are going to be a tad bit mature ...or not, as the joke here is that Kitty shows up in a corset and nothing happened. Haters love to hater and are calling Kitty immoral.

"So, Kurt, what you think of the episode?" Kitty asked sitting on his lap looking at his face, a mix of amused and aroused at the same time. Kurt waste no time in kissing Kitty taking that red lipstick in the only way he knows.

"What I think? You can feel what I´m thinking, Columbina" respond Kurt now taking more aroused side than anything else.

"Really, then undress me, Creepy, and show to me"

And Kurt´s fingers are dextrous enough to open her corset, to unbottom, to untie and to take what´s missing leaving Kitty free of any corset. "You are beautiful"

"You´re pretty too," Kitty said and Kurt chuckles not caring about being called pretty. He has more important things to do with one Kitty Pryde.

[kurtty-drabbles]

“We need to stop meeting like this.” (Amalgam!verse)

@djinmer4 @dannybagpipesarecalling @discordsworld @bamfoftheundead

N/A: Thief Columbina.

Her dress

In the Hilton Hotel of New Gotham, an exhibition of great jewellery is in a display to all members of the elite to admire as one does. The chosen room covers an entire floor and has the thematic of scarlet being used and abused here to match with the big necklace made of rubies that are being admired by everyone, especially by a beautiful woman with a cat mask that matches with her black dress.

The woman, with her seductive lips painted with vermilion, a smile formes in her pretty face as she is too admiring the jewellery, except, unlike the others guests she knows the secret behind said shinny and valuable object.

"Is a nice showcase, don´t you think, Kitty Pryde?" Kurt Ryder asked amused with a goblet of champagne in his hand and, of course, his noisy reporter attitude that Kitty is used by now.

"Yes, you've got a good eye for this, Mr noisy reporter. Have you thought in switch jobs?" Kitty asked crossing her arms at the man who is chuckling at this suggestion. Of course, he would.

"No, thank you, I´d think I´m made to be a reporter." and after drinking his champagne and even offer one to Kitty as the waitress was passing by(''no, thank you, I don´t go well with certain drinks'') the man asked what she´s doing here, in a more polite and friendly way, a difference that Kitty loves to point out to him ("be friendly and polite, Ryder, this will do wonders for you in the futures")

"Well, what I can say? I love a good show and rubies are my favourite" she speaks giving a cat-like a smile and Kurt Ryder nods and Kitty does not need to have telepathic powers to know he wants Kitty to stop her plans, but, Kitty does whatever she wants.

"And you, Mr Noisy Repoter Ryder, are you here to admire the show?" Then she frowns and look around "and should I be a concern by one of your ''fangirls'' trying to attack me again?"

Kurt pales at that and shows remorse even if the case was not his fault. "I came here with a friend of mine, Logan Wayne, and no...no fangirls here, and I apologize again for what happened in that day, what that woman did was wrong and really, I can´t say enough to make up for that" Kurt states and Kitty sighs.

"Just promises no more fangirls throwing wine in my face or dress. Because I´ll be very upset if something happened to this dress" she points to her dress for a moment "this one here is rent and is expensive"

Kurt Ryder wants to ask why she rent this dress, but, he didn´t have the time as Kitty Pryde smiles in that way as if she is the only one who understands this imaginary game and speaks again. "By the way, Mr Ryder, do you know the history behind those rubies? Norman Osborn brought this expensive necklace to his new wife, Gwen Stacy, a woman that is 25 years younger than him. A way to purchase her love and other things" Kitty concluded to the bewildered Kurt Ryder. "Oh, you didn´t know? Ryder, you´re my favourite reporter...how could you not notice this one?"

"I...tend to focus more on his corruption schemes and the judgment he´s so desperately is trying to prevent, but, wow I had no idea..." Kurt Ryder looks at the young woman with blonde hair and a fake smile that is with her arm intertwined with Norman Osborn. His eyes focus to Kitty Pryde, who in turn is amused at his expression, and dares to ask something. "How did you know they are married?"

"Easy, I read magazines and I saw Norman calling her my wife" Kitty almost laugh loudly here, but, she controls herself.

Now, Kurt Ryder has a more seductive tone in his voice. "You seem to know a lot more than I, do you want to talk?"

"I love euphemisms, Kurt, and I would love to ''talk'' with you, but, tonight, I´m working and like you...I don´t mix pleasure and work" Kitty said to a pouting Kurt Ryder, then she did kiss his check leaving the mark of her lipstick there. "Ask me again when I´m free, and Kurt Ryder" now she susurrate in his era gentle. "behave yourself tonight, ok?"

And with this exchange, the woman leaves and Kurt Ryder still smiles at this ghostly touching the lipstick.

______________________________________________________________________

Say what you´ll about Norman Osborne, but, the man knows how to install a security system. Kitty, with her uniform(she admits the leather material is a tad bit fetishist on her part), looks at the system in a safer spot. Security cameras, lasers and 3 floors to a subsoil where the real necklace is.

"Well, you´re still a piece of shit," said Kitty and using her gymnastic abilities and her phasing ability turns easy to find the first camera and put her device to make the cameras record something that happened yesterday.

No one needs to lose their jobs in a nice party like this one. Now, with the cameras showing only the past, Kitty moves to the next obstacle, the lasers.

"Please, this is so 2000" shakes her head at this, well, this would keep others criminal at bay, but, Columbina is no mere thief. She´s the thief. Using her powers she phasing through the lasers and was in the mood to even do ballet and flip the bird as well.

Now she is phasing through the last floor without a problem. The real necklace is suspended in the air, thanks to technology, and works with a weight system...if something weight less or more than the necklace than...well, no survivors are left.

"Really? stupid white rich people" Kitty shakes her head and without any shame, as she is humming the theme song of Indiana Jones and takes with her a fake replica of the necklace with the words ''sucker'' written there.

Enacting an old and iconic scene of Indiana Jones, Kitty replace the real necklace with the fake one, of course, there´s the time limit, but, Kitty is not worried and the trade is made perfectly.

"Oh, time to go home, sweetie," she said looking at the rubies. Now, she is flying to the rood intangible. No one at the view and Columbina smiles at the rubies one last time. "At least we´re alone"

"Ah, I´m glad you think so" A maniacal laughter follows that statement and Columbina sighs as she almost forgets Creepy would be here. "I missed you, Columbina, and it seems my dear Columbina is being naughty again" the green lunatic states with that big smile on his face.

"Oh, Creepy!" Columbina said pouting "We have to stop meeting this way, is not sane, if you want to ask a girl out wait until she´s free."

"But, you´re being naughty again, Columbina, should I let you go or should I hand you to the police?" Creepy asked more to himself and Columbina can play Ryder´s game.

"Well, I´m free of my work, Mr Creepy, and sure we can have a date now, in fact, why we don´t go watch ''you´re wrong'' reruns? I like Kurt Jack Ryder. He´s a good reporter"

"Psh, he didn´t even know about Norman and Gwen marriage"

Again, Columbina almost laughs here, almost. "Yes, but, he knows other details that I didn´t know, besides" Columbina kissed his cheek, the other side where Kitty previous kissed Kurt Ryder. "If I have to be punished, I rather to be you, Mr Creepy"

And that smile indicates that Creepy won´t bother with rubies right now, and well, Columbina is free of her work and has all the time to indulge herself and Creepy.

____________________________________________________________________

Kitty Pryde is in her house, well, apartment, when she goes to Kurt Ryder´s door, the two are neighbours and is Kitty often likes to catch up with the noisy reporter.

"Hello, Kurt Ryder," Kitty said hiding the smile and the love bite Creepy left on her neck. Kurt Ryder looks naturally handsome with his hair dishevelled like that. Is something Kitty takes a secret joy.

"Hello, Kitty, is everything alright?" Kurt asked trying to sound nonchalant as if he wasn´t the reason for the love bites and much more. Maybe the man should have been an actor.

"Yes, is just...I was wondering if you have time to drink something, my work is free and well, I think you´re owning me a nice free fangirl evening, right, Kurt?"

"Right, then we have a date"

"We do, Mr noisy reporter," she said amused and without caring if is appropriate or not she touches his hair, Kurt is not minding. "I like your hair a la natural combines with you"

"I look like a lunatic" Kurt complains and Kity chuckles and shakes her head.

"Nah, you look handsome and not a bit creepy"

"If you said so"

[kurtty-drabbles]

5. “I know it’s creepy, but I love watching you sleep. It’s peaceful, y’know?” (Amalgam!verse)

@djinmer4 @sailorstar9 @dannybagpipesarecalling @discordsworld @look-ma-no-hands336 @bamfoftheundead

N/A: Plot twist?

The TV on showing musical programs, the room is dark and covered by shadows and having little to no light to shine, except, the light of the TV. A person is sleeping in the bed soundly as someone else is in the room.

Columbina watches as Kurt Ryder is sleeping. She is biting her lips having now, second thoughts about this asking help from the best reporter of New Gotham also means ask help from the most arrogant reporter of New Gotham.

"Ryder?" she speaks in a low tone.

Kurt Ryder does not speak, only moves to the left side, still sleeping and this is her cue to back off. Too bad, Columbina didn't see his eyes are completely open.

On the next night, Kitty Pryde can´t sleep. Not for her inner demons hunting her, no she made peace with them, no, the reason she can´t sleep is a green wacko with a thong that is jumping in her bed and laughing amused.

Kitty tapes his mouth as her neighbour makes the famous questions "Kitty, are you ok?" "Yes, Mr Wilson" "Then shut up!" "Yes, Mr Wilson"

"What are you doing here?"

"And she says that as if she is innocent"

"What?"

But the man is too insane to reply properly and Kitty knows she won´t sleep, well, neither will Creepy.

[kurtty-drabbles]

"I can't hear you up here upon my inflatable throne." (Amalgam!verse)

@djinmer4 @sailorstar9 @dannybagpipesarecalling @discordsworld @look-ma-no-hands336 @bamfoftheundead

N/A: More of "does Columbina can see the future?" here

Kitty just finishes her show and is ready to go home and sleep, she hates social interaction, she loves her work, but, hates the old-time fashion people that keep insisting she should have a husband now.

On her way home, she spots something that really shouldn´t be caught the attention of a growing up that has a job, yet, Kitty Pryde is not a conventional woman.

"Hey, how much for the inflatable throne?" Kitty asked to the saleswoman who recognizes her from her TV Show. a Selfie was asked and Kitty takes her new trickery to her home.

-----------------

Nightcreeper is doing his patrol as he spots Columbina with something peculiar. His mind is too insane to register for complete, but, he notices the inflatable throne.

"Katzchen!" Nightcreeper speaks loudly and is jumping back and forth. "You have a throne? Is because you are a Queen?"

"I won´t let you forget you said that but, no, I think this will be useful in 3, 2 and 1" suddenly Logan Wayne falls in the throne "I´ve been falling for 30 minutes? How is that possible?"

"And I won´t let you forget you said that either"

______________________________________

Dark Claw calls Kurt Ryder to have a chat, well, that´s how Ryder puts but Logan is not one to chat. They will have a serious conversation.

"Kurt, your girlfriend has the gift!" he declares and Ryder is not believing.

"Because of the throne thing? Look, is not the first time someone does that with you, Logan, and I suspect it wouldn´t be the first"

"She got right with Kantique" Logan replied and Ryder is not going to pretend he cares for Kantique, but, it was indeed a lucky guess Kitty made.

"And...she got right on Jubilee getting pregnant and me having a baby. I´ll be a father and grandfather"

"Congratulations, Logan"

"Thank you, but, this only means your girlfriend is a seer"

"She also got wrong"

"Ryder!"

"Wayne!"

"She is a seer!"

"Maybe, maybe not, she got right a few times, but she got wrong many others times. How can you say she is a real Seer?"

"I don´t know, can´t your mother help?"

"If Kitty wants to know this, sure, if not, then it will be as it is"

"Fine"

[kurtty-drabbles]

“‘Aight wanna bet? I will phisically fight you for little spoon rights!” (Amalgam!verse)

@djinmer4 @sailorstar9 @dannybagpipesarecalling @discordsworld @look-ma-no-hands336 @bamfoftheundead

N/A: Kitty has no idea who Creepy is. I´m taking this as a continuation from the last Amalgam! Verse.

After that night, Kitty Pryde/Columbina manages to see a lot more of Kurt Ryder and Creepy. Is true that Kitty wants to know who the Creepy is, and goes as far as to fly all around New Gotham to see if she could spot the Green wacko, but, there´s nothing indicating he is there.

Columbina is flying one more time tonight, just to make sure she didn´t miss the Green Wacko, once again, she didn´t spot him anywhere, yet, she notices something different.

A typical villain of the week who is threating to blow the building, Columbina overheard that the detectives don´t understand what lead the calm Dr Sanders to went insane, which to be fair, should be something that would be pretty obvious by now.

Columbina is not a hero and could leave, but, she is bored tonight and decides to do something. Poor crazy Dr Sanders he never got a chance against Columbina.

"Columbina!" Kurt Ryder speaks amused and Columbina wonders where this man pops up, then again, she only notices the huge crown now.

Really? An insane Dr has a gun and people are here to look? Only in New Gotham indeed.

"Well, you´re not Wrong" she jokes and Kurt Ryder chuckles at this. "How did you find out Dr Sanders´s plan?"

Columbina is still hovering in the air and let the man wait in curiosity until she confesses. "I didn´t know jack shit. I look at him and notice he look as is girlfriend break up with him and lol behold is what happened, just that"

Kurt Ryder ponders for a moment. "Are you the greatest detective alive or a seer?"

"Well, if you are the greatest detective alive...maybe I´m a seer, who knows?" and winks at him and flies away. Missing the fact Kurt Ryder is smiling way too amused.

____________________________________

Kitty Pryde does not have to worry about the program now. They are in well-deserved vacation time and people don´t seem to mind the reruns and Kitty could use that time to do anything else...but her curiosity is too much.

"Uhm, who are you, Creepy?" she said biting her nail and looking at the photos in front of her.

"I´m me, dear Katzchen!" Creepy peak climbing in her window and once again wearing almost nothing. The man has an insane smile on his face and greets Kitty in his usual way.

Kitty is not afraid of the man, even if the rest of the neighbours are more than ready to kill him if he so much makes Kitty sherd a tear(yeah, she is strangely well-liked by ex-villains and ex-vigilant here)

"Creepy! Why can´t you enter like a normal person?"

"Katzchen, I´m Nightcreeper I don´t do doors" and laughs maniacally at his own joke and Kitty covers her ears, her neighbour told to Creepy to shut up.

"What are you doing?"

"Trying to see who is you, Creepy!" she exclaims and the man only smiles wild "but no success, oh, Creepy...can´t you just tell me who you are?"

"NOPE"

Kitty is bemused at that. "Then, can I show you off to Ryder? Oh, he would be so jealousy...and he would feel so dumb, Creepy he thinks you are not real"

Creepy snickers "someone will feel dumb indeed"

_____________________________________

Columbina manages to find his house pretty quickly and she thanks the social media and Ryder´s sluttiness to allowed her to find this place, his place, and Columbina is looking at his fancy house.

He has a good life.

"Columbina, funny to see a heroine at this hour" Ryder is there drinking wine and is offering a goblet to Columbina. "What I can do for you?"

"I..." he is taking this too well and Columbina needs to assert dominance here. "I need your help, you´re arrogant, but, also one of the best detectives ever"

Kurt Ryder is smiling and his eyes do resemble a tad bit of Creepy, which is odd. "If that is about.. your imaginary friend the Creepy..."

"I need your help to find laboratory 23" and with her reply this makes Kurt Ryder stop smiling and is caught on surprise, thankfully, the man did an article about the lab...said lab was set on fire under mysterious circumstances.

And once Ryder gives the information Columbina leaves and Ryder was sure that this is not how he was planning.

______________________________

"Why you don´t believe me?" Kitty said to Ryder once they are together eating a nice pastry to celebrate the new season Kitty´s show got, she is a hell of a good comedian and Ryder can´t deny that.

"What? A hunk man enters into your apartment?" Kurt said bemused

"And he is always wearing a thong, a red thong"

"Right...A red thong, look, Kitty, if you have your kinks is fine, no need to announce to everyone else" and then he adds "unless...this is a subliminal message you are sending to me?"

"You jerk, shut up"

_________________________________________________

Columbina is looking at model photos, well, male model photos and is forming a theory. Creepy is jumping around and in a moment to make him be less crazy. "You know...you would make a great model"

"Oh...Like Ryder?" he said amused now and giving that smile that all the criminals in New Gotham fear, which is great, cause a member of a gang was hoping in sneak upon Columbina and fight her but think again and decides to go home.

"Ryder was a model?"

"If Ryder was a model, I was a model too"

"Did Ryder ever wear thongs?"

And Nightcreeper laughs amused at that.

____________________________________________

"Good morning, kitty" Ryder speaks as he completes his show, is still morning, and the woman is blushing once she sees the man.

"Ryder...are you, well, were you a model?"

"And this ties up to your investigation how?"

"Your build is so similar to him...is equal to him"

________________________________Columbina shows up in Ryder´s house and tries to lift him but fails and on the next night, she tries to do the same with Nightcreeper as well. And she couldn´t help herself by proving her strength by lifting the printer machine with easy.

"Oh no!"

________________________________________

Kitty concluded the Sketch TV´s episode and is marching to Kurt Ryder´s cabin and closes the door, the man is not afraid. "People will think we have an affair if you keep this up"

"Well, you haven´t slept around for a while, if they jump to this conclusion ...this would help too" she said and looks at him stronger "Ryder...I think I know who is Nightcreeper, but, first, I need to know, are you into men?"

"...NO"

"Then the only explanation for that is that you are Nightcreeper"

"...." Kurt Ryder looks at Kitty as she crosses her arms "Well, it took you long enough and really you thought I was interested in Nightcreeper?"

"You two would make a powerful couple"

"....I don´t know if this is a joke or not, but, I think you and I would make an even powerful couple"

"Careful, I´m still mad at you for being a jerk"

"You´re a seer then"