Here is a small fanfiction I wrote and decided to transfer over here. Enjoy
Plot: After the purification of the Falkreath sanctuary, the Listener, Andromeda, has been plagued with nightmares of the night when her life was changed forever. To avoid the visions of the cold, dark night, she refuses to sleep and refuses to admit the issue to anyone. Jeopardizing the future of the Brotherhood.
The smell of smoke and burning flesh. Two things burned into Andromeda's mind that served as a constant reminder of what she lost all those months ago. It was as if the silence of the void had crawled inside her head and emptied it to only remember sorrow and pain. Why Sithis had destined her to be burdened with a plague worse than any ailment Peryite could delve his followers, she couldn't understand. Andromeda worked hard to serve the dread father, killing the contracts, obeying their mother, even letting the fool Cicero live against Astrid's wishes. However, nothing could save her from her last evening at the Falkreath Sanctuary
Shadowmere's hooves slammed against the stone path as Andromeda clutched onto the reigns, her knuckles turning white as she neared the place she had called home for little over a year. The pit in her stomach grew and grew with each clop of her horse's hooves. Although she was certain she had lost the Penitus Oculautus back in Haafingar, she could not stop to eat or to sleep. Andromeda had even prayed to the gods she thought abandoned her long ago, hoping that for some reason she would be able to get to the Sanctuary before Commander Maro's men.
All of the sudden, she found herself outside of her home. The forest surrounding the area reeked of oil drums and burnt flesh, signaling that her prayers had gone unanswered. The Penitus Oculautus were outside, waiting for the other men to rejoin them, assuming that she was already dealt with. Andromeda felt the rage build up inside of her and the hot tears well in her eyes. It was a nightmare, an utterly unbelievable nightmare.
And revenge was all she sought.
Much of that night blurs into a mess, for Andromeda does not remember killing the men outside in a rage and she does not remember entering the Sanctuary. But she does remember seeing Festus stabbed into the tree, his bloodied body being held up by arrows. She remembers the smoke filling her lungs and trying to help save Arnbjorn. She remembers the anguish but refuses to remember anything else
Even though that night happened many moons ago, it still remained fresh as if only hours had passed. She and the remaining members of the Falkreath Sanctuary had decided to make Dawnstar their home, in an effort to rebuild and make a name for the Brotherhood once more. With the emperor dead, they were off to good start, but there was still much to be done.
"Can I even help lead the brotherhood if I'm doomed to restless nights?" Andromeda heaved a heavy sigh and leaned back in her wooden chair. The candles had begun to burn low, casting dim shadows on the walls of her room. It had to either be late into the night or early into the morning. Either way, she had not planned on going to bed any time soon. She instead was content with sitting in her chair at her desk and twirling a dagger into the wood, starring at partially blank journals that detailed her months after the unintended purification.
"I sleep when it is necessary but is that enough? If I am to fall at the hands of my nightmares, what would become of the family then?" Andromeda twirled the knife some more before grabbing the hilt and slamming it into the table, splintering the wood. "But when I sleep all I can hear is the emptiness of life inside of that...that...that tomb!" Pulling herself out of the chair, Andromeda faced the mannequin dressed in Commander Maro's armor, which she plucked off his lifeless body after she impaled him on a sword on the docks in Solitude. The anger boiled within her again and she grabbed the bottle of half-drunken mead off her desk, chucking glass at the wall beside it. It shattered into many pieces, and the liquid ran down the cold stone.
The anger fled her body as fast as it entered, causing Andromeda to sadly sigh and walk to the wall. She crouched down and began to pick up the shards of glass.
"Listener?" The creaking of the wooden door filled the empty silence, and the fool Cicero bounced inside as if nothing had transpired inside the once quiet room.
"What do you need Cicero?" Andromeda focused on finding the glass shards in the dimly lit room, not even bothering to look at the jester.
"Well Cicero was just on his way to oil mother when he heard glass break and he began to worry about the listener" Cicero walked around the wooden table, closely eyeing the dagger splintering the wood. "Does the Listener require any assistance from humble Cicero?"
"No! I do not require any assistance, I am fine!" Andromeda snapped, hoping somehow he would read that she wanted to be alone and he would leave to tend to the mother. As she snapped, she squeezed a shard of glass in her hand, causing blood to trickle down her pale hand. With a small groan of pain, the Nord tossed the shard to the ground and rose to her feet. She turned her body and walked passed the jester, who only followed with his eyes. Andromeda walked up the stone steps to the dresser by her bed, opening the drawer she pulled out some bandages and proceeded to wrap her hand.
"Dear, sweet, Cicero only wishes to help keep the listener safe to ensure the glory to our dread father" Persisting, Cicero began to clean up the shards himself, humming a soft tune to himself. Andromeda stared at the man as she finished bandaging her hand.
"Cicero, please don't. You have other duties to attend to" She shifted her footing on the cold floor, yet did not move from her spot beside the bed.
"Would be a shame if the sweet listener stepped on any broken glass inside of her room. Then she couldn't send any more wretched fools to the void"
"A little glass would not kill me"
"Ah, but you see, the glass can cause a wound and the wound could become infected. Which then would cause the listener to drop dead in her room. Then the family would be lost and poor Cicero would have to find a listener all over again" He rose to his feet and dumped the glass into a bowl on the nearby table. Andromeda slowly nodded as she watched the jester. Once he was done she exhaled and pointed to the door.
"Okay, well you may leave now" She pulled her raven black hair back and stared at the floor, wishing to be returned to the silence where it was only her. Wishing she could just be in the void of nothingness.
"Will the listener be going to sleep now?" Her green eyes widened to the size of the moons and she shot her gaze up. Nobody in the sanctuary had asked about her sleeping patterns previously, so she had assumed it had gone unnoticed, which she was fine with. Because if Nazir and Babette were to worry about her, Babette would probably mix some foul smelling potion for her to fall asleep. And only Sithis knows what Nazir would do, and Andromeda was not exactly keen on finding out.
"What is this lunacy?" She let go of her hair and forced a chuckle to pass her lips. Normally she would consider herself a good actress, it came in handy when she needed to trick a contract into thinking she was somebody she wasn't. She hoped that the fool would be none the wiser and fall for similar ruses.
"Cicero wakes up bright and early to tend to the night mother before the listener awakens and tells Cicero it is time to take care of another man or woman in the name of our dread father. However, as Cicero awakens in the morning he often hears the listener muttering to herself about flames and death. They should be happy topics, but the listener always sounds so sad. So, the clever Cicero decided to stay up all night a few weeks ago, and he heard the Listener once more speak to herself. And the listener is not like Cicero when she talks to herself"
Andromeda inhaled deeply before walking down the stone slabs once more. Her right hand moved to fiddle with the bandage on her left as she stood across the table from Cicero.
"Well, no. If you leave Cicero I will not be going to bed. I do not wish to fall asleep" Andromeda tried hard to keep her composure, despite being fairly annoyed with Cicero's unwillingness to leave her be.
"No, no. That won't do! The listener needs her rest if she wants to help lead the sanctuary under the night mother"
"I'm doing just fine, Cicero" She spat her words out like they were made of venom. Perhaps the words affected her so much because she knew that he was right, but she did not, could not, and would not sleep unless she absolutely needed too.
There was a silence between them, which caused Andromeda's demeanor to falter. She believed that she had begun to hurt the poor Jesters feelings, after all, he was just trying to help her and the Sanctuary. She did not have to raise her voice at him or snap at him.
"Cicero, I'm sorry. I just don't want to go to sleep. I can't stop thinking of the fall of our old Sanctuary" Her words only met more silence, which made the situation feel more awkward as usually, Cicero doesn't stop talking, "I mean, I understand having to kill Astrid. But Veezara, Festus, Gabriella, and Arnbjron, they didn't need to die. They followed things that they thought needed to be followed and followed Astrid because it is all they ever knew. And if I had gotten there just an hour sooner they may all still be alive and us having to rebuild the brotherhood from the ground up would not be happening. And I cannot force the smell of smoke, ash, and burnt flesh from my brain no matter how much I wish for it to be gone. Which is why I don't want to sleep because every time I close my eyes all I see is the people who brought me into their home horrifically dead. And in the end, it feels as if I am the one the blame" Her eyes became glassy as angry tears started to stream down her face. She took the sleeve of her tunic and wiped underneath her eyes.
"Listener's fault? You? Now that's madness. It is not the listener's fault that the sanctuary went up in smoke. No, no, it is the betrayer Astrid's fault for trying to set you up! She defiled the sanctuary and made the rest of your family puppets"
"But that doesn't mean they had to die!" The sobs from Andromeda began to spew out of her, and she hated herself for it. She was a Nord assassin for the Dark Brotherhood who killed the emperor, and here she was crying about how the purification of the Falkreath Sanctuary makes her lose sleep. She tried to breathe between the silent sobs to regain herself, but to no avail. "Please, Cicero, just go"
There it was. That silence. However, this silence was different because the two of them still stood in the same room together. Cicero, for once did not respond to her final speech. He instead hummed a soft tune as he usually does and approached her. He gently wrapped his arms around her and held her there. Andromeda's mind then became quiet as the Jester held her in his arms. Her rage, her anguish, her pain all seemed to melt away as she listened to Cicero's humming. For the first time in awhile, her body relaxed at the touch of someone else, causing her to lean into his embrace and close her eyes.
Cicero then positioned his arm around her, and walked her to the bed on top the risen platform. He helped her lay into the bed and laid the furs on top of her.
"Cicero must now go and tend to the night mother for he has duties as keeper he must attend to. However, dear sweet Cicero will be back to check on you and make sure you are sleeping soundly during the morning. Cicero will even instruct the rest of the family to keep away from your room as you have not been sleeping well" Andromeda could only let out a small noise of acknowledgement to his words, already beginning to drift into a dream world of her own. Cicero then proceeded to walk around the room and blow each of the candle out, softly mumbling to himself about having to buy more candles and a new table, before walking to the door.
"Good night, sweet listener"
