When Senshi was young in the dungeon the majority of the adults he were with ostracized him. All except Gillin, who died to make sure Senshi had something to eat: unseasoned boiled meat that may or may not have been one of their comrades.
It really puts into perspective why he was so nurturing towards Chilchuck. When Chil reveals he’s 28 to the party, Senshi responds by telling him that he thought he was older. Senshi was in his 30s when he and his comrades got trapped in the dungeon, so it’s safe to assume that he thought Chil was at a similar age.
He met a young boy who was, from his perspective, forced to do dangerous work in the dungeon just like he was, and so, Senshi made an effort to look after Chilchuck in the same way Gillin looked after him.
Mind you, when Senshi was young in the dungeon he had to starve for weeks, eat the horse he loved, and finish it off spending the next i don’t know how many years wondering if he committed cannibalism.
Senshi understands first hand the value of nutrition and proper eating, so when he’s with the party he makes an effort to make sure they’re all eating a full and balanced diet. Not only that, but Senshi INVOLVES them in the process of getting food to eat, always preparing it in front of them and narrating every ingredient in the process so that there’s no doubt about what they’re eating.
JUST WATCHED GOOD OMENS 3. I MIGHT PASS OUT. IM SO HAPPY 😛😛😛😛😛
I think I might have had a heart attack… multiple times.
FUCK YES VRO. FINALLY. FINALLY.
TAKE THAT STRANGER THINGS FINALE!!!!!
(Just looked at what other people are saying and apparently this is a hot take?? Okay… okay.)
SPOILERS BELOW !!!!!
IM SO HAPPY THEY GET TO GROW OLD TOGETHER I THINK MY BRAIN IS GOING TO EXPLODE. FINALLY. FINALLY NO QUEERBAIT FOR ONCE. THEY ARE MARRIED. NIGHTINGALES. HAHAAGAHAHHAGAGAGSG
IDC WHAT ANYONE SAYS THAT WAS AMAZING (especially with the shortened season..)
YYAYAYAYAYAYAYATA IM NO LONGER GOING TO KILL MYSELF!!!! HORRAY!!!!! IM OVERJOYED!!!!!
I…I am scared that I’ve lost all motivation and energy and interest in continuing my rottmnt fics. I know the reasons why, and I’ve tried ignoring it and taking a break but it’s still there. The feeling of disappointment in both myself and disappointing others.
this year started off to a great start for me. Made stories, made friends and had a great time over all. And then…it all fell apart. I lost some friends, and when I try to make my own private server, issues happened.
I left a discord server I was in before, one that I loved at the beginning and slowly. Very slowly, saw how toxic it was beginning to be. And I left. Sadly leaving behind some cool people I grew to like, and when I try to idk reconnect with them, it feels off? At least for me. It’s not their fault. It’s most certainly mine no doubt
I’ve definitely changed in some ways. I’m not the same person I was back in idk April. Or whenever I started posting on tumblr. Idk if this change in me is for the good or bad but it’s scary. Too many changes are happening to me and I don’t like it. Some of it is good but not all and I don’t know how to handle it properly.
I’m exhausted. Mentally and physically. Been in the hospital from not taking care of myself. My memory getting absolutely god awful than it used to be already. Everything is hurting me. I’m more paranoid, more anxious, more angry even. More depressed?? Idk, but I’m crying a lot more now, having panic and anxiety attacks more frequently, haven’t slept for weeks. Bed rotting, not even going outside unless I’m forced to.
my mood is all over the place and sometimes it’s hard to properly control. I do try to not burden others with my emotions and my issues. I don’t want to ruin anyone’s mood. And just put on a mask of being like I’m okay when im not. But I can barely get myself to talk to others about it or when I do, and they offer to help I decline it. Make some sort of excuse, anything.
One of those reasons being…what can someone even do for me? There is only so much a person can do to offer help. And while I appreciate their efforts, I don’t want to stress them out or anything like that. I always believe that my problems and health aren’t important and that there are others out there who have it way worse than me.
TW; brief mention of SH
I can’t remember what month it was exactly, maybe either October or November but I did hurt myself. And i didn’t care. Not really. I’ve definitely had trouble in the past about SH. But it’s been years since I physically done something to myself. And then i relapsed during the October-November period. I still have the scars. I only did it twice, but I still SH and I hate myself for that. I haven’t done it since but it’s there every day I wake up.
I am unsure of myself anymore. I want things to go back to the way it was before with me having my friends back, with me just chilling and making silly AU’s and stories of the rottmnt fandom. But it’s not going to happen, at least from my perspective it won’t happen.
I honestly don’t even know what’s the purpose of this post. To apologise for how slow I’m being with stories? To apologise that I’m not doing enough. To apologise to the people that I use to be friends with. To apologise to myself for being a complete mess and idiot this year.
I just don’t know anymore…
Sorry for this random vent post. I didn’t know how else to voice my feelings.
my best friend sent me your most recent hyuck fic last night and i swear IM OBSESSED with you now!! we both are don’t get me wrong but i just can’t wrap my head around the fact that someone writes the way you do and isn’t a published writer (that we know of lol). you’re so talented i wish i could write like you💕
your friend… sent you MY fic??? and.... you're obsessed?? ...with me????
