It was much colder in Snowdin than usual and the days had gone by like the last one would never end. Sans was quietly contemplating what to do in this barren wasteland of what was once a town filled with monsters, but there was nothing..
He was having one Bad Time.
Sans had been thinking back on all the different timelines, all the different dreams and all the different distant memories that he once had. Thinking about many questions such as;
What had gone wrong?
What had gone right?
What was different?
What was the same?
These were all things that he wondered about on a day to day basis and could never find an answer to either of them, no matter how hard he tried.
-----
He gave a hard sigh as his ‘eyes’ looked off to the side from underneath his hood.
*It’s one of those days again, huh, Papyrus?...
Of course.. Papyrus had been gone for a long time, but it brought him solace to keep asking him things and talking to him even if he was never present anymore. The scarf was all he had left of his beloved sibling and it was now the most precious thing to him in the entire world.
----
Shaking his head in denial to his bare surroundings, he was about to take a step forward before he heard something. It was unusual...
AN: Because Undertale is such an awesome game, (even though I regretfully have never played it) Sans and Papyrus give me huge feels
Sans stood there. Stood like a stone statue, frozen in place, dumbfounded out of his mind. Where was he? What happened?
He turned swiftly, hearing footsteps behind him.
There in front of him was Tori's precious child, was Alphys anime buddy, Undyne's sparing partner. His and Papyrus first ever friend. But... But there was something different about them. Frisk's eyes were a crimson red, unlike their deep brown ones he has gotten so use to seeing during these last three months.
Abruptly, he remembered Frisk telling him — or rather signing him something.
"Flowey once said— my save files aren't always going to stay that way. That something would happen... And we'd go back to the very start."
Sans recalled how scared they were after telling him this. How defeated they looked.
Oh god. Had Frisk—
No. No, no way. They couldn't have. Frisk promised him that they'd—
"k-kid? Please tell you didn't reset—" His nerves were shot and his body of on edge as he continued to stare at the child, this sensation increased when Frisk pulled out their toy knife caked in blood.
Oh shit....
He realized then that this was no longer Frisk.
This was Chara.
And just like last time Chara raised their blade and slashed down. A agonizing scream bubbled to his throat as the brutal attack tore through his clothes and sliced open his ribcage, the pain was indescribable, it hurt so damn much. But yet, unlike last time, Sans wasn't able to choke down his cry lanced with pain. Ripping from his mouth, it echoed loud, almost ear splitting.
"aAAARGGH!" It was the loudest sound that he'd ever made.
Blood poured from the gaping wound of his chest, and some spilled from his mouth.
But as quickly as it appeared, as fast as Sans relived his own death, everything disintegrated and warped into another place, an area he's lived in for as long as he could remember. Sans found himself deep within Snowin's pathway to the caves.
The snow blizzard was always thicker and increasingly more dangerous on the way to the caves.
He walked a short distance before he saw a two figures standing across the other. Squinting his eye sockets, Sans realized that it was Frisk and— oh. Oh god no.
Papyrus?
No! No... no!
But yes, it was. There was no mistaking the red scarf flowing in the wind. No mistaking that cheerful, friendly voice that cut through the whistling of the high winds.
Papyrus was there.
Papyrus was with Chara
His eyes widened as he remembered in one of several memories of him trying to save Pap before Frisk finished him off. He couldn't fathom why Frisk decided to reset everything, why? Why when everything was so peaceful? Why go back to where it wasn't? Why go back to only be possessed by Chara and lose their family? To nothing but a murderer?
Yes, he didn't understand. Nor did he care. All he cared about was getting to Papyrus.
Sans ran. He ran as fast as his bone legs could carry him. He could feel his heart drumming in his chest.
Thump
Thump
As he ran, he heard his brother talking about the kid... Frisk—Chara, needing guidance. The same words he's heard come out of Pap's mouth several times in different realities. Papyrus was speaking, trying speak to Frisk— Chara and give them a tutor, someone that will put them on the right path. A friend of all things. His brother still saw good in anyone, even if they did bad things to good monsters.
In the thickness of the blizzard, Sans saw the kid raise it's knife Papyrus, his brotherly, naïvely unaware of what Chara was actually doing. Thinking he was receiving a hug.
No...
Thump
No!
Thump
Thump
Please!
He forced himself to go fast, willed himself to move, to get there in time. Sans reached his hand out in an attempt to grasp his brother's shoulder and yank him away of the attack.
SH–ING
"PAPYRUS!" Sans couldn't help but yell out as he watched in horror as his brother's head was cut clean off his shoulder he watched it tumble to the ground and his body disappear.
Tears fell from his eye sockets immediately, almost like someone flipped a switch. Huge crocodile tears dripped down his face and Sans fell to his knees in the snow.
Not again...
NOT AGAIN!
Why could he never get to Pap in time, why couldn't he never save him from being killed by Chara!? Why was he so useless!?
"SANS?"
Sans froze, that was.... He looked up and was met with his brothers head looking straight at him.
"WHY COULDN'T YOU SAVE ME? WHY DID YOU LET ME DIE? WHY SANS?"
Sans' breathing was labored and his ribcage clinched and his heart felt like it was breaking. He grabbed his head, barely being able to take it anymore. He felt like he was crumbling into nothing, falling apart at the seams.
"WHY. DID. YOU. KILL. ME!? WHY, BROTHER?"
And Sans screamed.
-
-
-
"SANS! SANS!? CALM DOWN, PLEASE!"
A voice. He knew that voice. That was...
"Sans, please. You must wake up. I do not wish to hurt you."
That one was Tori.
"Sans! You better wake up or I'll smack you awake!"
Undyne...
"S-Sans, please let go of Frisk."
Alphys?
What was she talking about? Frisk was no where near him. Sans couldn't see anything, it was darkness and all he felt was anger an' pain and hatred for Chara, for Flowey. For resetting everything and making him lose—
"SANS! OPEN YOUR EYES!"
P-Papyrus? Could it— No, no it was a lie. He saw Pap die right in front of him just like countless times before. This was a trick, it had to be a trick planned by Flowey. Just to torment him more and push him deeper into insanity. It wasn't real! IT was a lie!
His thoughts, he must have spoken them. For the voice's words became more desperate. "PLEASE, SANS. WE ARE BEING TRUTHFUL TO YOU. IT WAS JUST A NIGHTMARE. PLEASE, BROTHER!" It— the voice sounded like Papyrus, it even sounded like it was deeply worried. Maybe, he could— even if it wasn’t really...
Slowly, taking a deep breathe, Sans closed his eyes and opened them again. Almost immediately the darkness faded and he was face to face with Chara— hot blue anger erupted within him. But it dissipated instantly when he saw those eyes weren't red. They were brown, this was Frisk. His friend.
The look on Frisk's face though. They were scared and worried all at the same time. Sans own face took a expression of shock and fear when he noticed the blue aura around them as it lifted Frisk and himself off the ground, by his own powers.
His breathe hitched in his throat at this realization. In his darken reality, in his earth shattering nightmare, he had almost hurt his friend. Mentally his mind and or body thought it was Chara he was about to kill. But that's no excuse for what he almost did to someone who set his kind free.
"k-kid— F-Frisk... I'm sorry... I— I didn't mean...." He trailed off as he gazed at the young child who was staring up at him with concern brown eyes.
"SANS?" A familiar voice spoke out, almost above a whisper but loud enough to be heard from the friends around him. Sans tore his gaze away from Frisk and towards the voice. His eye sockets immediately locket on to the figure in front of him.
It was Papyrus.
It was his brother.
His alive and in one piece brother.
Everything was fine, everyone was alive and safe. There had been no reset.
"p-Papyrus~?" He said, his voice quivering. Tears gathered in his eyes and they soon fell down his face as he continue to stare at Pap, stare at his look of deep worry etched a crossed his features. Sans had been so so very broken when Pap had died before. After all Papyrus was his everything. His brother was all he had, Sans had raised them both from tiny skeletons after— after Gaster....
Sans bolted forward, tripping over his own feet the rest of the way as he tearfully embraced Papyrus in a tight hug. "th—thank goodness! I thought.... thought that everything, all of it— I thought you'd died again, I thought everyone died and there was nothing—nothing I could do!"
"SHHH, SANS. IT'S ALRIGHT. EVERYTHING IS FINE, OUR FRIENDS ARE OKAY. I AM OKAY. PLEASE, DON'T CRY. BIG BROTHER."
But Sans couldn't stop, he couldn't even if he wanted too. He's let the dam crack and burst open, he's let his emotions that he's been burying deep inside him for so long, out into the open for all to see, finally after all this time. Finally, he didn't have to be the strong one anymore, Sans didn't have to pretend he was alright when really he was drowning on the inside.
Finally he could let himself be comforted, be protected by his brother. Even if it was his job as the older brother to be strong, But honestly, he didn't want to let that go.
"i-i can't... Papy! i know so many things! Things i wish i could forget! T-the reset– the save function— Chara possessing f-frisk— Them killing everyone... Killing you! So— so— m-many! So many d-difference pasts I've seen." Sans found himself babbling as his voice hitched with his sobs that began to hurt his throat. He swore to himself he'd never reveal any of those other different time lines to any of their friends. He'd never tell that Frisk had the power to reset all their lives if they wanted too.
But Sans could no longer take this crushing feeling. No, he couldn't take this feeling of depression, this sensation of despair suffocating him to the point where he wanted to just— give up because of what a failure he has become.
The feeling of wanting to end his existence.
Arms tightened around his body as he fiercely clung onto the only person that's been his rock, his stability, his motivation through his entire life. Please, Sans prayed desperately. Please, who's ever listen' don't take him away from me! Not again!
"SANS. I DON'T UNDERSTAND... PL—PLEASE, BREATHE. I'M HERE, I'M HERE WITH YOU. WHATEVER IT IS THAT YOU ARE DEALING WITH, WHATEVER IT IS YOU'VE SEEN, KNOW THAT I AM WITH YOU— I AM HERE FOR YOU." Sans heard Papyrus whisper out, the crack in his brothers voice, clearly stating he was trying hard not to cry as he continue to hold Sans close to him.
Sans somehow was able to pull his face away from Papyrus's chest and look up at him. Fully taking in his little brother's face, there of a look of worry, a deep frown was also present, a few orange tears fell from Papy's eyes when he saw Sans' aqua blue ones fall too. Fully seeing how distraught his older brother was by the things he's witness and never spoke a word about.
Not being able to take the fact that he was making the taller one cry, Sans lifted his hands up and rested them against Papyrus' cheek bones. Gently, he wiped the felling tears away with the pads of his thumbs. Remembering, abruptly that he hasn't done such a affectionate gesture since many years ago when Pap was seven years old, clumsily tripping over fallen snow covered tree branch, fracturing his knee.
Papyrus seemed to recall that memory too, for more tears started to flow down his face, dripping down and sometimes slipping past Sans' hands. "OH SANS..." Realizing now just how deep the older's anguish— his torment and depression truly was, because back then he had shed more tears then Papyrus had, the guilt and heart little Sans endured almost overwhelming.
But it was nothing compared to the Sans in front of them all.
Papyrus leaned forward and softly placed his forehead against Sans. Comfort. Sans needed— craved comfort. Wanted it so desperately, wanting himself to be reassured that everything was going to be alright. "IT'S OKAY, BIG BROTHER." Papyrus did not know who this Chara was, nor did he know about any save or reset buttons, but if they were causing Sans unbearable pain, then he'd gladly fight each one of them to prevent any more pain they inflict on his brother. "I AM ALRIGHT. IT IS ALL GOING TO BE OKAY. I WILL PROTECT YOU, SANS."
Sans sank back into Papyrus' embrace. Letting out a choked noise between a sigh of relief and a sob of lingering fear. He clung tighter to Papyrus.
"Sans, your brother is right. We will protect you from whatever it is you fear. Nothing will harm you ever again." Sans heard Toriel say in a gentle motherly tone. As he felt a hand being placed on his shoulder. Seconds later he left scaly arms hug him from behind.
"Yeah! Sans! If this happens again, I'll throw a spear right at their faces!" Undyne's voice rang out and clear. Shorter, lesser scaly arms hugged the sides of him and Papyrus.
"Y-Yeah! Even if I can't do much, Sans. I'll still try my ve-very best to protect you!" Alphys said in her usual nervous tone, still thinking little of herself but still filled with determination to protect her friend.
Another hand fell on his left shoulder. A deep, soothing voice comforted him the best way he could. "Tori is correct, Sans. You've been strong for so long, have endured so much hard ship. Now it is time for use to care for you. To help you like any family should." Asgore's deep fatherly tone made Sans' breathe hitch in sad nostalgia.
Short, tiny arms wrapped around his other side. A face pressed against the upper arm of his coat. Frisk gave Sans a truly sad, guilty expression. They knew perfectly well who Chara was, as did they know about the torment of the reset 'switch'. And as bad as it had been for Frisk to cope with. It, obviously, is ten times worse for Sans.
"SEE, BROTHER?" Papyrus said in a gently, reassuring voice. "WE ARE BESIDE YOU, SANS. LET US BE YOUR SHEILD FROM ATTACKS, BE YOUR DEFENSIVE LIGHT FROM THE DARK."
Slowly, Sans gazed around him, Papyrus, Undyne, Tori, Alphys, Frisk, Asgore— seeing all his friends, his family around him. Shielding him in a bubble of love and protection.
He smiled for the first time in so long, it was true and genuine and hopeful. They, all of them. They all want to help him, comfort him, love him... Be there for him.
Come hell or high water.
Relaxing in the warmth of everyone around, he lay his head on Papyrus' chest, hugging him closer.
Sans, finally, was willingly to allow it.
AN: PHEW! This took me longer then I thought it was! I'm exhausted! I wasn't expecting for this to be as long as it was. BUT it is!
