--about this culture war between the left and right regarding (what had initially been a feminist-ly perpetrated concept of) "toxic masculinity" is the fact that, from all the commentators I've seen on toxic masculinity yet, I feel that everyone has radically different understandings of its definition and how it translates to the real world. Which as you'd expect leads to a world of strawmanning and zero-progress arguments.
From what I can tell, there are 4 main "definitions" of toxic masculinity-- or 4 main interpretations. Here's the cumulative list:
1) Hegemonic Masculinity Definition
The Wikipedia page on hegemonic masculinity argues that toxic masculinity is "the use of 'toxic' practices such as physical violence, which may serve to reinforce men's dominance over women in Western societies".
So there's a slew of problems with this definition. For one thing, really? "In Western societies"? Last I checked it was in the Middle East where things like honor killings and forced veiling of women were happening :/ Another thing-- violence as a means to control others is hardly a thing exclusive to males alone, and significant portions (if not most) of domestic violence can be credited to women against men.
2) Socio-cultural Negativity Definiton
This is the definition of toxic Masculinity that I used to subscribe to. Cultural and social perceptions of masculinity that, in some occasions, manifest in ways that it harms men and boys-- i.e.: being teased as "gay" or "girly" for crying or expressing emotions, or being put down for not participating in sports or being conventionally attractive/muscular or interested in conventionally masculine activities.
Toxic ideas surrounding masculinity and what men "should" be like.
And of course there would be toxic femininity too, where girls are disparaged for being masculine and are forced into feeling like they can only practice feminine roles or appearances.
3) Radicalized Masculine Characteristics Definition.
Another definition of toxic masculinity that I subscribed to, which is expounded on by Laci Green here, is the definition that conventionally masculine characteristics-- when emphasized or radicalized too much-- manifest in harmful ways. And again the converse works with toxic femininity too.
4) Conservatives'/Antifeminists' Definition
The typical conservative understanding of toxic masculinity as far as I can tell is that they think it means "masculinity is toxic in general", and obviously like any sane people they would oppose the idea of toxic masculinity if that's what they think it means. I think Steven Crowder mentioned once in a video that he believed the only actual example of toxic masculinity was cat-calling culture (and I agree that cat-calling culture is an example of Toxic Masculinity, it fits well with Laci Green's explanation of TM).
I don't think toxic masculinity is anything to do with degrading masculinity in general (masculinity in general is an excellent thing to see expressed in people and in men, and usually quite natural for men too), but there are certainly feminists out there who ardently make it seem that way. They try to paint masculinity with the same bad brush.
But yeah. That's my general two cents on it.
I think we should all just agree on a good definition of what toxic masculinity should be and just move the conversation from there.
