Gray looked at you in horror when he spotted you were bleeding, the scene was shocking and terrifying for him. He remembered how you look so weak and almost dying, you were bleeding and the fact that you’re pregnant multiplying his fear. He thought he would lost you and the fear of losing was eating him alive.
Praise the Lord for His blessing, he brought you to the hospital on time. The Doctor did this best to give you emergency help, he said you were too stressed. Also for first trimester of pregnancy, minor bleeding is common as long as it’s just few blood stains. The baby was fine but your health little bit needed more attention.
You had been sleeping for almost seventy two hours straight, you needed sleep to gain your energy back. The boys came whenever they could due their business, this time was Simon and Jukyung who came up right after the meeting. They even brought clothes for Gray since he refused to go anywhere, he wanted to be the one whom you found when you wake up.
“How’s y/n?” Simon asked, feeling sorry for Gray. He knew how exhausted Gray was for the past days, he refused to leave you, sometimes Simon would force him to go clean himself, Gray was really messy and fucked up.
“Still sleeping.” Gray answered bitterly, his eyes were looking at you, longing your presence. He felt so lonely and empty without you.
“She’ll wake up soon, Sunghwa. Don’t worry, y/n is strong.” Simon squeezed Gray’s shoulder, comforting his little brother.
“She’s pregnant.” Gray mumbled, more like talking to himself.
“Pregnant?” It was a fresh news for him, while Jukyung at the other side kept silent.
“It’s my baby, but she thinks it’s someone else’s. She’s petrified, the pregnancy makes her stress and feel guilty because she thinks the baby isn’t mine.” Gray explained, his hand tightly holding yours.
“It’s complicated.” Simon commented while Jukyung’s mouth was hanging open, too much news for him to be processed. Your health, Gray’s condition, and the soon to be nephew or niece who make him feel excited and worry at the same time.
“It’s a mess, and it’s all my fault.”
“Hey, stop blaming yourself. Y/n needs you, your baby needs you too.. Be strong for your family.” Simon tapped Gray’s back then added, “Congrats, Sunghwa.. You’re going to be father.“
"Thanks, hyung."
"Congratulation, hyung.. I can’t wait noona to wake up and babbling about how protective you are about the baby."
"I love you.” You smiled like a high school girl, feeling so giddy when you said the love words. It’s the same voice and still the blurry face but your heart felt so much happiness whenever you heard his laugh.
"I love you more!“ The guy said back, very eager and confidence. Not giving you chance to doubt his sincerity.
"No, I love you more than you love me.” You argued back, there’s no way you’ll let him win even though your heart was nearly explode with happiness hearing his confession.
“Can you let me win this time?” The guy asked again, slightly sounded annoyed. The guy and his familiar voice which you couldn’t draw his face. It was always blur when you tried to see his face.
"Never in million years!“ You stuck out your tongue.
"Alright, but the fact is there’s no one love you more than I do.” Then he cut the gap between you two, leaning in to kiss your lips slowly. He was so sweet and addictive.
When he pulled himself from you, you could see clearly who he was. It’s Gray.
The familiar voice whom you often hear but his face was difficult for you to remember, now it was clear and vivid. He was Gray, your lovable and sweet Lee Sunghwa. He’s the love of your life, the one and only guy you needed the most to be sad and happy with. It’s him and it’s always him no matter life make your world up and down, Gray would be always your best company. He completes you, he makes you feel perfect in your imperfection.
Came across the memories, it was about you and Gray. The warm feeling when he hugged you, his boyish smile when he bragging about his achievements, the taste of his minty breath when he kissed you. You remembered how nervous he was when he asked you to be his girlfriend, how he lied to you about his difficulty to sleep to convince you to move in with him, so he can have a better sleep.
It was him who giggled along with you and Simon who busy buried Jay beneath the sand, it was him whom you wanted to make him happy, you brought lunch for him that day and you had fight at the studio. It was him who told you to go home, then you granted his wish. You left him with anger filling your heart then you met Simon, you drove him home but in the middle of driving you lost your concentration.
That was it. You had a car crash. You lost your memory, partially. But now everything were putting back together, like scattered puzzles, slowly one by one back to its place, leading you to regain your memory.
Gray..
You felt so relieved as a small smile drawn on your lips. The darkness was surrounding you, completely isolated you from anything. Then you heard a voice not far from you.
"Baby, it’s me..“ his voice sounded sad.
Gray?
You knew his voice.
"You will wake up, right? You just love to sleep, aren’t you?” He said again, his voice was shaking, holding his tears.
Oh, Gray.. Why are you so sad?
"I know sleeping is good for the baby, that’s why you’re still sleeping, am I right?“
You wanted to wake up and tell him everything will be alright but your body betrayed you, it was felt so weak as if you didn’t even have bone on yours.
"Please, I can’t do this anymore..” he sobbed, sounding very heart broken.
“Please wake up, for me.. For our baby, for us. I beg you.."
Gray.. The baby, we’re fine. Please don’t cry..
You attempted to say but nothing you can do.
"It’s yours."
"No!” He yelled at you with anger filling his eyes. He was clearly furious and frightening. It was the first time ever happening you found him so angry like that.
“Please believe me, it’s yours.” You pleaded, scared that he might kick you or hurt you physically.
"You’re lying! You bitch!“ He looked at you in disgust as if you’re something annoying and unpleasant.
You felt like a trash.
"No, please.. I love you, it’s your baby. It’s ours.” You reached his arm but he moved backward.
"Get off of me! You and your filthy hand!“ He shoved you harshly, not caring at all that you’re a pregnant woman.
He was so rude and heartless. He wasn’t Gray who you loved, he’s different.
"Oppa, please!” You cried desperately.
You jerked up, waking up from your sleep with cold sweat all over your body. Your heart beat faster like you just finished run in marathon.
It wasn’t real, it’s only a dream.
You realized when you looked around, it’s still dark, you were on bed and the smell of hospital hit your nose.
Hospital? Oh, right.. I fainted and bleeding.
Yeah, bleeding.
Oh, no! How’s the baby?!
You placed your hand on your belly, rubbing it gently. You felt it, the baby’s still there. Your baby still with you. It still being part of you.
Then you glanced at your left side, there was nothing except the cabinet which full of flower and various packages. Usually you loved packages but this time you had no interest on them, you’ll find out what’s inside and who’s the sender later.
When you glanced at the right side, you found Gray was curling on the couch with uncomfortable position. He used couch’s hand as his pillow which make you sure he would have major cramp on his neck when he wake up. He must be really tired to care that his sleeping position was so uncomfortable and hurt his neck.
Gray’s here.. He’s here, he’s not leaving you. He probably have been there and refuses to go home. You thought, knowing that Gray was stubborn and rock head. However, you felt so relief as you realized it was only nightmare, Gray was still here for you, he didn’t go anywhere, he’s not going anywhere.
Tears of happiness rolled down on your cheek, you blinked few times before wiped your tears and glanced at your left wrist, you had an IV. Then carefully, you moved out from the bed, feeling strong enough to walk. You dragged your IV’s stake with you along with fluffy pillow on the other hand, walking slowly approaching Gray.
Once you closed the gap, you saw him closely, admiring the man that you always wanted to fight for. He’s wort it, he’s always. You felt the emotion to touch him. Luckily it was a big space couch, so you could sit on the edge and bend a little, you cradled his head gently, placing the fluffy pillow behind his head then kissed his forehead. He stirred a bit but then he snuggled his head closer to you. He’s in deep sleep.
He had stubble on his jaw, probably because he hadn’t shaved for days but it wasn’t make him look unpleasant. He looked so tired, normally you won’t interrupt his sleep but this time you needed him. You just need to be in his arms and holding you tight.
Seeing there’s an enough space on the couch for you to lie down with him, you didn’t even think twice to invite yourself to join him. Placing you IV stake near you, you lied down beside him, snuggled closer to his chest as you made his arm secured you.
You missed him, he was the home that you always looking forward to back to. His embrace was the only place that you wanted, his kiss was addicting and mind shattering. He’s all that you’ve asking for. Having Gray was the best thing ever happen in your life.
“I love you..” you whispered before closing your eyes into deep slumber.
It felt so peaceful and light hearted, you could sense your smile drawn on your lips. It felt so good and warm as you felt strong arms hug tightly, hiding your body like a cocoon.
Gray’s eyes fluttered to open, feeling dizzy and lost at the beginning then he realized he fell asleep on your hospital room. But when he glanced at his chest, he found you cuddling him. At first he thought he was dreaming, but when he adjusted his position, he heard you grumbling incoherently as you tightened you arm around him. That made him sober in a flash.
He noticed he was no longer using couch’s arm as his pillow, it was already changed into real fluffy pillow. Then he saw your IV stake, standing near you. Wondering when you woke up and decided to join him on the couch while he couldn’t notice your movement. He was sleeping like a bull, he thought.
But for him, it was the best view to wake up, having you on his arms just like what it used to. He kissed the top of your head then you stirred, craning your neck and pouting which made him doing his best to not launch tons of kisses on you.
“I’m sleepy..” you mumbled, still pouting. Not aware that Gray was watching you.
Few days ago he saw how you terribly scared about the pregnancy, worried that he might kick you out from his life. But here you are, sleeping soundly on his arms like nothing happen.
It’s not like he’s complaining.
“Sleep more…” He rubbed your back in soothing motion, carefully not touching your IV. He could ask later, that’s what he thought. His priority was you and it’s always you.
thinking to end it at this chapter but the I want to ask my readers’ opinion, who wants one more chapter as ending??
You walked out from the hospital with trembling legs, just what on earth is this?! This monthly check up was supposed to inform your health and your memory progress not to informing you that you were pregnant and had no idea who’s the father of your baby. You were aware enough that you’re not kind of woman who needed to get married first for sex, but with your condition right now, you absolutely clueless with your past relationship. You didn’t remember any of your intimate relationship and your friends were never bugging you either.
Doctor said it was your nine weeks of pregnancy, then it must be happened before you lost your partial memory.
Could it be the guy whom you had one night stand with? Were you that cheap? Were you kind of girl who likes to sleep around? Did your boyfriend know about this and leave you? Were you that pathetic?
You bit your lips nervously, thinking all the possibilities but you ended up shivered in disgust by your own thoughts. This problem couldn’t be solved by yourself, you couldn’t count on your own memory ability, you needed someone who can be trusted to help you. Whether you could find who’s the father or not, you definitely wouldn’t get rid of this innocent baby.
It’s your fault, not her or him. She or he has right to live. Your palms unconsciously rubbed your non existed belly, feeling that sooner another human being on it. Tears rolled from your eyes but you kept walking, not bothering to wipe from your face. How could this happen when you just got back together with the guy that you love? How did you explain to Gray?
‘Hey, I’m pregnant. But I don’t know who’s the father.’
or
‘I’m pregnant but I still want this relationship with you.’
or maybe..
‘I’m pregnant and you should be responsible.’
What would he think about you? He must be feeling disgusted by your deed, no doubt.
After you reached your apartment and got in, you cried silently again, pouring out your sadness and your frustration. You loved kids and you’d love to have your own child, but not now, not in this situation. It was too early and you didn’t know how to do. For god’s sake, you really wanted to scream but your body had no energy left. So here you were, letting yourself sinking on the floor, sobbing harder.
“Stop grinning or I’ll break your teeth.” Simon scowled from the other side of couch. He was on his office with Gray and Jay, discussing his new song. Gray already made an awesome beat and Simon really loved that. The beat went along with his rap, flowing softly yet powerful. But Gray’s stupid grin was the only problem for Simon. Apparently, Gray couldn’t stop his toothy grin since he arrived at AOMG headquarter.
“Gray hyung obviously got laid last night~” Jay wolf whistled, teasing Gray. Hoping his hyung would spill some of his dirty and steamy night. Well, boys and their dirty talk!
Instead of getting the answer, Jay got hit right on his face. A crumpled McD paper bag landed cheerfully on his face, 3 points for Gray.
“You sly fox, eishhh..” Simon looked at Gray in disgust then three of them laughed.
“I’m a good guy!” Gray defended himself, “I have no heart to take an advantage of her, I’m a man with dignity.” He explained calmly but obviously his eyes were dreamy as if he wondering something about you.
“Yeah yeah, dignity. That’s why you couldn’t stop grinning like an idiot, picturing my little sister naked on your bed.” Simon rolled his eyes, he knew Gray loves you so much but he couldn’t help his over protectiveness of you, moreover in this situation. Gray and his needs probably would scare you.
Gray blushed in embarrassment, “We haven’t do anything, yet.” He spilled. Of course he wanted to do something with you, but you guys just got together and it was too soon to do something more intimate than kissing. He needed to go slowly but sure he’ll get it at the end.
Jay gasped and Simon’s eyes widened, “Shit— you and y/n are getting back together?!”
“Umm— kind of..” Gray rubbed the back of his neck but his cheeks were blushing like a fool. Your soft lips still could he feels, and yes he was grinning shamelessly.
“Whoahh, they get back together!” Jay announced.
“Hey, we never break up.” Gray protested, he didn’t like the idea of you and him getting back. You and he were never broke up, you guys were inseparable.
“Yes, but she forgot who you are, so does it mean she already regain her memory?” Simon adjusted his seat, looking interested.
Gray’s grin faded, “No, she still doesn’t remember me.”
“Cheer up, hyung! Then you should do something to remind her, take her on date which you already did together, it might help.” Jay suggested.
“Yeah, I think so too. However, I’m glad she’s still mine despite her lost memory.” The fact that you still fall in love with him really warm his heart, even if you couldn’t get back your memory he would stick on your side.
“I thought you were thankful because you can touch her again.” Simon added and Gray bit his tongue, however Simon’s word was not particularly wrong though, he just won’t admit it.
You were lost in time on your sadness, you didn’t know for how long you sat on the floor, crying your heart out loud. You felt your tears getting dry as your butt felt numb for sitting on the cold marble floor for only God knows how long.
Deciding to start map out your life, you got on your feet, wiping the strain of your tears. After stood few moments waiting for your balance were back, you made your way to your bedroom. You remembered you bought five different pregnancy test tools to confirm what the doctor said before. He could be wrong, right?
Your shaky hands rummaged your bags, taking out pregnancy test tools. You clutched them tightly due your nervousness, pacing back and forth on your bedroom before deciding to take them with you to the bathroom.
It seemed takes forever for you to wait the result, you already used five of them and now you were restless waiting the result. The doctor said you’re pregnant, but the pregnancy test could say something different. But then you remembered that doctor more accurate than pregnancy test!
You groaned in frustration, still pacing back and forth while sometimes took a glance on your bathroom, wondering if it was the right time to check the pregnancy test or not. After ten minutes passed, you mustered up your courage to go to the bathroom, preparing your mental to embrace the reality.
“Y/n?”
Oh, damn— Gray’s coming!
You heard him calling your name again, but before you could get rid of the evidence, he already poked his head on your bathroom.
“Here, you are!” he exclaimed, circling his arms around your waist. “I was looking for you.” He gave you lingering kiss on your nape which usually made your knees weak but this time you were too anxious to feel it.
“What are you doing here?” He kissed your cheek before he spun you to face him.
And you couldn’t say any single word. Gray felt your body tensed, he cupped your face and caressed your cheek gently, “something happen?”
No. You shook your head, your throat felt so dry to talk to.
Then he noticed something on top of bathroom vanity sink, probably he spotted your pregnancy test tools. Before you could hide them and blocked Gray, he already reached the vanity and grabbed the test packs quickly.
I’m dead. That’s what you thought, everything will be ended at this point. He will leave you right after he knew the truth.
He studied them for a moments before turned to you, “Positive? Whose testpacks are these?“
But you kept silent.
“They’re yours?” He showed them to you, asking for your confirmation.
You bit your lower lip, not knowing what to do. There’s no use to deny because he saw the evidence, sooner or later he will notice when your belly getting bigger. Maybe this was the right time before everything late.
“Y/n?” He called you but there’s no anger in his voice.
Your eyes getting teary, this was like you were being trapped and there’s no way out. You started to sob when you try to speak causing Gray held you in his arms.
“I’m pregnant.” You confessed.
Then there was a pause as you wait for him to blow up and accuse you as a whore. But he said nothing.
“I’m nine weeks pregnant..” you sobbed again but Gray still held you in his arms, there’s no sign he would let you go, “I don’t know who’s the father, I can’t remember anything, I’m sorry.. I’m so sorry, oppa..” you sobbed even harder, “I’m dirty, I don’t deserve you. I’m–”
“Nine weeks?” He asked.
“It’s not yours, we just get together for a week.” You wiped your tears but damn this tears won’t stop coming out.
“You’re pregnant.” He said slowly but his face was unreadable, you had no idea he was mad or shocked.
“I know, please forgive me.. I will accept the fact that you want to break up-”
“You’re pregnant?” This time he asked you as if he didn’t listen your words.
“You can hate me, I deserve that..” you cried but Gray cupped your face.
“Baby, you’re pregnant.” He looked at you with his glistening eyes. You were too stressed facing his reaction, instead of fuming, Gray only asked you the same question like a lost soul.
Tears kept falling down from your eyes, your eyes getting sore for too much crying and your head felt heavier, the feel of thousands needless poking your head came again, this time was more intense and unbearable for you. You gasped in pain, clutching Gray’s arms for support.
“Y/n? What’s wrong? Where do you feel the pain?” He said in hurry and worry tone.
When you wanted to say something, you felt something painful on your stomach, as if someone punched your stomach over and over. It was terrible pain then you felt something thick dropping on your thigh and down on your legs.
It was blood! The baby! No!
When you found yourself looked at it, you became hard to breathe, once you lost your balance and everything disappeared from your vision.
"But, dad—" Lee Seunghee, your fifteen years old daughter whined. She looked like Gray as if God was copy Gray and paste on Seunghee, her pointy nose snorted as she looked at Gray’s in disappointment.
"No." Gray shook his head and said firmly. His eyes darted on his daughter, if his eyes could have laser, Seunghee would probably already burn from his intense glare.
Seunghee was Gray’s favorite and she knew how to melt her dad’s heart, she gave Gray her adorable puppy eyes, “Daddy, please..”
But Gray didn’t fall for it, not this time. He didn’t want to let his daughter slip away, so he didn’t say anything and just shook his head, continued to dig his food.
"What's wrong, dad?" Seunghyun asked when he entered the kitchen, finding his dad and his little sister having a heat discussion. Seunghyun, your oldest son which look like nothing but Gray, you didn’t know why but Gray’s genes ran out really well in your family, making you sometimes upset because no one of them inherited your genes.
"This little girl asked me to let her go on date." Gray replied curtly, very displeased.
"Heol~ with whom?" Seunghyun stopped and stood behind Gray's chair, voluntary glared at Seunghee. Both of them were really protective to Seunghee.
"Ask her."
"Who's that unlucky guy, Heeseung?" Seunghyun loved to play with Seunghee's name to make her piss.
"None of your business." She rolled her eyes.
"Lee Seunghee, watch your language when you talk with your brother."
"Da—"
"It's Jungki." Gray informed his son then Seunghyun coughed hard as if he lost oxygen from his lungs. Jungki was his bestfriend and son of Jung Kiseok or world acknowledged him as Simon Dominic. And not to mention Jungki was one of player, a heart player. Well, Seunghyun was one of them too but Jungki playing with his sister’s heart wasn’t a pleasant news for him.
"You gotta be kidding me, Heeseung." Seunghyun rolled his eyes and took the seat beside Gray’s.
"I caught them at the coffee shop two days ago." Gray couldn't hide his annoyed tone.
"What."
"Laugh and lovey dovey."
"Shit."
"Language, Lee Seunghyun."
"Sorry, dad." Seunghyun quickly apologized, rule was a rule, whether he pissed or not, no one could swear and say inappropriate things in this home. That was one of rule that you and Gray made for the peacefulness.
"Geez, why would you date him?" Now it's Seunghyun who looked pissed.
"Yeah, why?" Gray supported his son.
"He's freaking five years older than you!" Seunghyun added.
"Yeah, that little bastard must be pedophile." Gray added, still in jealousy tone. He treated Jungki as his son, but the idea of letting his precious daughter dating Jungki was a big no. He’s player, just like her dad when he was young.
"You're right dad- wait no. Mom is eight years younger than you." Seunghyun reasoned.
"That's true, Jungki oppa is just five years older. The pedophile one it must be you, daddy." Seunghee attacked back.
This wasn’t predicted by Gray, now he was cornered and his pride wasn't ready for this, "What? No. Me and your mom was different, I met her when I was 28. We both were in legal age to date."
"But still.." Seunghyun wasn't sure who's side he was but his curiosity didn't let him back off.
"Stop arguing with me or both of you will be grounded for God knows when." Gray threatened. That's his final card, grounded means they have to stay at home with limited money allowance. Basically living as home prisoners.
"Geez.." Seunghyun and Seunghee whined at the same time.
"Take it down and stay here, I need to discus with your mom. We need to know what I'm going to do with you, Seunghee." Gray said then took out his phone from his pocket, searching for your number. He might sound scary and discipline but your kids only well behaved under your spell, that's why Gray needed you and the kids worried you might give them hard time more than Gray suggested.
"Daddd!" Seunghee shook her head, pleading.
"I'll help you to discuss with mom." Seunghyun added, smiling in victory.
"No, young man. You hurt me, you need to get your punishment too."
ELO – ‘Cupcake (Feat. punchnello)’가 국내외 전 온라인 음원사이트를 통해 발매되었습니다. AOMGOFFICIAL YouTube 채널을 통해 뮤직비디오가 함께 공개되었으니, 많은 관심 부탁드립니다.
ELO’s 'Cupcake (Feat. punchnello)' is now available on all streaming platforms (releasing time may vary depending on the country). Its music video also available to watch on the AOMGOFFICIAL YouTube channel.
