I SWORE Coconuts appeared in more the series.... he appears in like 17 or 18 episodes, I think? Idk. People should give him more attention, he's too damn CUTE.
The Super Special Sonic Search and Smash Squad doodles 😛 lowkey they should bring Scratch, Grounder and Coconuts back
hello, your balls are strapped to a 10,000 volt car battery, and if you don’t choose what I should post in the next 24 hours, I will turn it on and they will explode
Uhhh, I know nobody asked, but here are my headcanons for the guys (don't hate me for the Scratch one). I've had these headcanons for ages, but I thought I'd share them and see how I get crucified afterward.
Chapter Summary: One needs quite a lot of cunning to survive this hunt! Mistakes and inconvenient details are simply unacceptable! Deals, tricks, and mind games galore!
Buckle up because this one is a bit long
.........
"MARRIAGE?!?!?" Robotnik yelled. "You-I-wha-" His jaw went in all the directions.
Even the dumbots were struck silent. Frozen in their silly stances.
"Well, why not?" Katella leaned back in her chair, and flicked her fingers towards him.
"You live in space!"
"Why should that be a problem? I doubt either of us is up or down for a traditional relationship."
Robotnik blinked audibly. "Then, what are you hoping to get out of this?"
Katella hummed, resting her cheek on her palm. She closed her eyes to think.
"A kingdom."
The words echoed through the room.
Robotnik's instinctual shock and resistance to the idea was punched back, just for a moment. "Is that what you're after? What makes you think I—that marrying me—would give you an entire kingdom?"
She leveled him with an unimpressed look. Her voice hardened. "Don't tell me you couldn't give me one if you so choose, future ruler of Mobius."
Robotnik stiffened. Hearing the title out of her mouth lured all of the blood to his face. Oh, she was good. "Well of course I could, but why should I give anyone anything?"
"I would think that a husband and wife could share."
Robotnik threw his hands up and paced. The huntress' eyes tracked him lazily.
"What would I get out of this arrangement? What would you get out of a kingdom? Aren't you interested in animals and aliens?"
"Exactly," Katella leaned forwards, an annoyed look flashing across her face. "Do you have any idea how many planets I'm wanted on?"
The doctor opened his mouth.
Katella held up a hand. "I have no qualms with the bounty hunters and law enforcement who come after me. They're quite fun." She huffed. "When they aren't letting my exhibits loose. Tack on being on the move all the time, I have to keep my zoos either small and separate, or stuffed in my main ship. The center of my operations is constantly changing and being chased around the galaxy. I'm sure you can imagine the difficulties with logistics and storage of such a diverse range of specimens in those circumstances."
Crossing her legs and leaning back, she continued. "A kingdom on my home planet would allow me to set up a flagship show and a permanent base. Additionally, being married to the planet's ruler will give me the authority to persecute my enemies at my own discretion, and allow me to establish official ownership of my collections." Smirking like the lioness who caught the ostrich, she finished, "Not to mention, the intergalactic hammer of justice has a much harder time finding its nail when the head is gold."
"I see. Very sound reasoning." Robotnik grabbed the back of his control panel chair and spun it around. Sitting down to face her, he considered her words. "But still, what do I get out of this arrangement?"
Katella raised an eyebrow. "I would have thought that a genius such of yourself would have realized what a bore it would be to run out of world to conquer. Not only do I come with zoos full of entertainment, but I have contacts on many different planets that could use… an overhaul."
As reluctant as Robotnik was to admit it, this proposal was sounding more and more appealing. Concrete, long-term plans--a future of domination--wrapped in animal skins and scarlet hair.
A mustachioed grin slowly grew. He leaned forwards, resting his elbows on his legs. "Life could never be boring with you in it, dear Katella, but I see your point. But shouldn't wedding presents go both ways?"
A bright, almost childishly gleeful smile lit up her face. "I have an entire ship full of amazing and one-of-kind specimens. Aliens with fur on their antenna and eyes coming out of their ears. Invisibility so complete that it seeps into your memory. Even from this planet—a flying rabbit, a young actress who can turn into anyone, a two—"
"A two tailed fox?" Robotnik finished.
The huntress blinked, lips parting. "How—"
Grounder and Scratch—whose antics Robotnik had done his best to ignore up to that point—both screeched. One of them dropped a wine glass.
"Wait, WHAT?"
"She has the fox brat!"
Robotnik pulled out a large wrench and threw it into their direction. They shut up nicely.
"Were you two not listening? At all?" Robotnik rubbed his forehead. Addressing Katella, he explained, "The biggest thorn in my side is Sonic the Hedgehog—a blue little rat who can run faster than sound."
Katella straightened, failing to hide her investment, assuming she even tried.
Robotnik smirked. "His shadow is that fox kit, appropriately named Tails. Earlier today, Sonic came by to ask if I kidnapped him (again). I'd say the true culprit is rather clear."
Puzzle pieces locked together behind her eyes. She made an amused yet slightly annoyed sound. "He did show a great understanding of the routine. Little shit."
"And I believe it's time to move on to the next act." Robotnik rose and approached his guest. "I will accept your proposal, under the condition of receiving both Sonic and Tails as wedding presents."
Katella stood up to meet him, holding out her hand for a shake and a kiss. "Done and done."
Tails tried to ignore it, but it proved impossible to stop his eyes from drifting back to those metal clasps on Cream's ears. He flicked his tails, very aware of their lightness. Part of him wanted to tell her, but a lot of him had no idea how to do it.
When you can move, fly, like no one else, how do you talk to someone in basically the same situation? The same cage, if you will.
Right now, Cream clutched onto one of his namesakes like a stuffed animal while she napped. The whole kidnapping thing really tuckered her out, along with many others. Gran-Gran was still awake to make chit-chat though. She was singing the praises of the sunflower butter Katella provided her with earlier—the only good thing she would say about the younger woman.
The relative silence was broken by a series of loud clangs and "oh phooeys!" approaching their room.
Tails locked eyes with Gran-Gran. She gestured for the little duck to get behind her.
Following her lead, Tails gently pulled Cream from her pillow and planted himself between her and the door.
There was a lot of beeping and clanking as the thing got closer. Tails found it familiar.
The panels finally opened, revealing a giant piece of paper with legs.
"This should be it!" a voice squeaky with oil exclaimed. "Please tell me this is it!"
"Coconuts?" Tails realized quietly.
The little monkey was too preoccupied with double-checking his work to hear. Once he was done, he folded up the big paper and looked around the room.
"Never thought anyone would need a map to find their cage," Gran-Gran greeted. She, along with everyone still awake, looked rather confused at the robot's appearance. Tails was too, but for different reasons.
"I'm not lookin' for a cage!" Coconuts huffed. "I will have you know that I am one of the trusted members of His Evilness Doctor Robotnik's SSSSS Squad."
Multiple people gasped. Gran-Gran grabbed the bars and shoved her face into them to get a good look.
"If by 'trusted member' you mean, constantly on sanitation duty."
Coconuts' gaze zeroed in on the kit. "Aha ha HA! There you are, brat!"
"Yeah, yeah." Tails hung his arms out of the gaps between the bars and rolled his eyes. "What are you doing here, Coconuts? Is Robuttnik assigning you someone else's toilet to clean now?"
Coconuts' entire head turned red at the insult. Steam whistled out of his ears. He reached into one of his storage compartments and grabbed a key that he waved in Tails' face.
"No! The Doctor and Madame Katella are getting married! And you're one of the wedding presents, fox!"
His namesakes flicked back on instinct, fur threatening to stand straight up like he was being electrocuted. Pushing past the fear, he ran the statement back over in his head.
He scrunched up his snout at the idea of Robotnik getting married. To Katella of all people. Imagine how spoiled their kid would be. Tails wouldn't wanna touch that omelet with a twenty foot fork.
"Gross," he said. "Don't tell me I have to be there for the vows other mushy stuff. I think I'd throw up if I had to watch them kiss. Usually it's just kinda gross, but those two together is nightmare fuel."
"Yes! Yes! You do have to be there! I'm here to make sure of it! And so you don't get to make any funny business."
Sonic's day could not officially get any weirder. Robotnik was getting married!? His fiancé was an intergalactic criminal who kidnapped his little bro!?!
Pardon his language, but what the heck was going on!
He was close to ripping his own quills out as he tried to think of what to do.
His usual M.O of speeding through traps and running circles around the dumbots in disguise was simply not going to cut it here. His main focus had to be freeing Katella's prisoners, which likely meant dealing with her and/or Robotnik directly.
On second thought, maybe his usual M.O. could work, if he bumped it into overdrive.
Dust spiraled down the hill as Sonic raced to the closest village. He slammed into a library (metaphorically) and landed at a desktop.
He surfed the web, nearly losing himself in the forums filled with conspiracy theorists and true crime aficionados. Who knew that Katella was so famous for not being around? As he caught up on her story, he grew more frustrated at the irrelevant ramblings.
Finally, one anonymous poster claimed to have tried contacting Katella's family, but did not find anything useful. It seemed rather invasive, but lucky for Sonic.
The poster left the name of her family's company and a few addresses, and he was able to follow the spider web to a phone number. As soon as he had it, he began searching for craft supplies.
He wrote a handful of beautifully elegant cards:
You are cordially invited to the official Union of Katella the Huntress and Ivo Robotnik, PhD⁶
Location: Robotnik's Front Lawn
Date: Tonight, maybe tomorrow
—Robotnik's SSSSS Squad
Sonic dashed over to their HQ and stuck the invite to the bottom of their mailbox with some gum he found on the sidewalk. Then, he skipped his way through their security systems to leave the extra copies on random desks, only keeping one in his hand.
Before anyone had time to pick up the wind-blown office supplies, he rushed outside to the closest payphone.
"Hello, we wanted to confirm your attendance at the upcoming wedding ceremony. If you don't know what I'm talking about, check your mail already. Call Katella and Robotnik to confirm at—" he listed off the doctor's lair's phone number and address, which he of course had memorized.
Katella skimmed through all of Ivo's files on Sonic. She was slightly disappointed that this great man she was about to marry couldn't manage to catch one, singular menace, but no one was perfect, she supposed. He had her for this now.
It was a slight shock to the system to see pictures of the two-tailed fox dangling behind him by the hand. Since she already had him captured she didn't bother reading his file at the moment. She would wait until it was time to make him a show, or if she needed him as bait.
The easiest way to catch the hedgehog would be to set a trap, one that he simply couldn't speed through. Ivo had plenty of materials and designs ready to go. Not a single one of them would be enough by itself, but glancing through his file revealed a several potential avenues. One of which managed to surprise her.
Who knew that particular purchase might be money well-spent.
Just as she was ordering some less than intelligent robots and her interns station themselves in Seaside City and remote locations across the islands, like the forest near the old bird's village, she received a call from her hubby-to-be.
Fortunately, it was not a video call, as the thought gave her an embarrassing blush.
"Yes, Ivo?"
"Katella!" He sounded out of breath. Perhaps he was just as—if not more—excited than she was.
"I'm here, darling," she flirted.
"Oh-well I-you-ahhhh," the phone practically turned red. "Did you send out the invites?"
The question caught her off guard. She cleared her throat. "Well, it is a rather short notice. I thought we were having the ceremony once I caught the hedgehog?"
"That was the plan, but," he cut off for half a minute. "Don't worry about it! We can talk once you're done. Just one quick question—how do you feel about sunflowers?"
"I don't eat bird food," she answered immediately. "Now, I need to get back to the traps. Catch you later, love."
Cream woke up when Tails pulled away from her. She felt like she was still in a dream. Everything felt fuzzy and strange. People said weird-y things.
Like that little monkey robot that said he worked for Robotnik. Cream knew who that was. Her favorite bedtime stories were about the heroic Sonic the Hedgehog foiling the evil schemes of the dastardly doctor. Mama often made up big robot monsters to be the villains. The tales always ended when they got defeated in funny and creative ways by the supersonic hero.
The bunny thought he was the coolest. She sometimes hummed his song without really meaning to. (Chocola would always dance to it…)
Seeing one of the evils out of her bedtime stories made her tail start quivering. He may have been small, but she was, too.
Then, Tails opened his mouth, and her heart went into overdrive, hopping over a few beats. He seemed to be completely unimpressed. Fear filled her tummy when Coconuts said he was going to be a wedding present, but her new friend insulted the villains to their faces.
Everyone else looked surprised too. Gran-Gran squinted at him for some reason.
The bunny knew that Sonic stood up to evil-doers all the time, but seeing someone else—someone just a little older than her, who had held her through her terror—inspired and excited her more than any bedtime story.
She watched, in her dream-like trance, as Tails continued to badger and press the monkey. She couldn't really see him that well. Tails was blocking the way. His tails hung behind him, tense and occasionally twitching. They made a big jerk when the robot—Coconuts—cackled loudly at him being upset. Because he was a wedding present.
He's being taken away.
She sat up, resting on shaking arms while staring at her cell-mate's back. The room became darker and slower as she realized what Katella was going to do.
"How much longer until I'm scarred for life?" Tails bulldozed on.
Coconuts hmphed. "Once the hedgehog is taken care of."
Tails' tails flicked. Cream still couldn't see his face.
"Do you really think that melon-head can catch Sonic?" Tails asked, like he really didn't believe it.
"We-well—" something metal clanked—"she will! Just you watch!"
"Huh." A hint of that tone was still in the fox's voice. "She must be a way better villain than Robotnik, then. Hard to believe he just gave up like that. For a girl." He said the last word like it was kinda yucky. Cream's eyebrows furrowed and her frown wobbled.
As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he turned to Gran-Gran. "Ah-I'm sorry—I meant—."
Gran-Gran held up a chastising finger. "Think about what you say before you say it, young man. But, I agree with the main point." Her attention shifted. "No one would give up anything for that woman unless they were completely, madly delusional. Or stupid."
Coconuts stomped his foot. It was super loud. Cream put her hands up against her head, having a hard time covering her ears. Tails' looked like they flattened for a moment.
"The doctor isn't stupid! Or delusional!" the monkey yelled.
"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh—he gave up then!" Tails flicked a finger up. "Finally came to his senses, huh?"
"What the fuck are you talking about?"
"Hey! Think of your audience!" Gran-Gran yelled.
"You really need to stop teaching me swears." Tails informed him.
Cream would have to ask her mother… or Gran-Gran… about that later. She was completely lost. The conversation washed over her like the tides.
"I MEAN—" Tails continued his last line of thought, "—that Robuttnik must have realized that he wasn't evil or powerful enough to catch Sonic, so he found someone who was. And I bet he'll hand everything else over to her, too. Face it, Coconuts. Katella beat him without having to do anything."
"No no no no no!" The monkey stomped a few more times and waved around his clenched fists. One looked like it was holding something. "She hasn't!"
"Well, what's stopping her?" Gran-Gran asked, as if she were talking about clouds. "Maybe she's planning to poison her lipstick, so when her and the doctor seal their bond with a kiss…"
"NO!" Coconuts yelled in horror. "If she kills the doctor, I won't get that promotion!"
"Promotion to what?" Tails asked, laughing at the monkey. "The SSSSS Squad? There won't be one if Sonic is captured."
Coconuts lunged to grab the bars to their cage.
Cream flinched back and let out a little squeak. Tails let out a short gasp, and he half-turned to face her.
"I have to stop her! How do I stop her?" Coconuts pressed his head against the bars, fists coming up like he was going to grab the fox and shake him if he didn't get an answer. The question grabbed the older child's attention. He looked around the room for a second before pointing through a gap in the bars.
Cream followed his finger to a metal box on the wall, near the door.
"You can use the thingy-ma-jig in there!" Tails claimed.
Coconuts shifted before running over to the box. He fell over a few times as he tried to stretch out his arms and tail to grab it.
While he was struggling, Tails rushed to Cream. "Roll up into a little ball. When the door opens, go over to Gran-Gran as quietly as you can," he whispered, nervousness filling his voice for the first time in a while.
"Wha—" he covered her mouth.
"Trust me," he asked.
Looking into his eyes, it was the only thing she could do, so she nodded.
He took a deep breath and ushered her over to a corner. She curled up, looking remarkably like a small decorative pillow or rolled-up blanket.
Twin tails swished as the fox took his spot by the cage door.
"Do you want me to grab it for you?" Tails asked the still-struggling Coconuts.
But how would he reach it?
"NO!" Coconuts answered. He struggled a few more times, out of breath even though he was a machine. "Would you?"
"You hafta let me out first."
Coconuts ran over to the cage and flung the bars open. "Get the thingy-ma-jig! And show me how it works."
Cream peeked from her ball. Coconuts and Tails were walking over, backs facing her. She quietly uncurled and tip-toed out the cage and over to Gran-Gran, who looked very happy and surprised. She put a feather over her lips and Cream mirrored her.
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Super silently, the two watched the fox and the coconut as they reached the box. They were talking about codes or something.
Suddenly, Tails' tails twisted up behind him and started to spin and spin and spin and spin and spin. It was so fast it made Cream dizzy. When her eyes uncrossed, they grew to the size of her tail fluff.
The fox's feet left the ground and he flew over to the box.
Gran-Gran put a wing over her mouth, and several others could not contain their exclamations of shock and surprise.
Cream bounced up and one of the metal clasps hit the outside of Gran-Gran's cage.
Coconuts turned, "What was—ARGH!"
Tails picked him up by the wrists, slung him into their now empty cage, and slammed the door shut. Along the way, he somehow got a key which he used to lock the monkey in.
Coconuts landed heels-over-head with sparkly stars in his eyes.
After mailing the last invite, Sonic raced around several islands and all the way back to Seaside City to find someone willing to fly him to Katella's ship. Unfortunately, all of the pilots responded:
"Sure!"
"It would be an honor!"
"We just need to get the angry lady off the ramp."
"As long as you sign my plane on the way!"
Then he would turn his back and they would vanish into thin air. At this rate, there wouldn't be any aviators left in the archipelago.
He was getting more and more frustrated and tempted to join the pissed-off woman making her grievances known to a police officer when a possible solution hit him.
Running through the Air Traffic Control people, he tracked down that government vehicle from earlier. It was near Gran-Gran's hometown.
The lady who had been holding the tablet was leaning up against the hood, on a call. The driver had presumably gone out for an afternoon snack.
"Hey!" he interrupted her. She shrieked and dropped her comm. He caught it before it reached the ground.
"Son-Mr.-"
He waved off the shocked greeting. "Nice to see you again, too. Now, right to business." He leaned forward eagerly. "Do you guys have a plane? Or a helicopter?"
The woman caught her breath. "Yes, of course."
"Perfect! I need a ride! I know where the missing people are!"
The agent nodded stiffly. "Follow the car. I'll make a call."
He raced the vehicle all the way to the nearest air field. Though it may be more accurate to call it a glorified pebbled lot. The hedgehog arrived half a minute before the car and watched as a small helicopter blazend with thick, dark windows and some government symbol descended.
The car came up from behind him, and the woman stepped out, somewhat out of breath. She knocked on the pilot's door and exchanged a few words before giving Sonic the go-ahead. "Just tell our pilot where you need to go and they'll drop you off."
He gave her a thumbs up. "Thanks!"
The seats were obviously intended for humans, but he still made the seatbelt work. Safety first, kids!
He waved to the lady agent on the ground as the helicopter took off. Once they were past the treetops, he leaned forward to address the aviator.
He said, "Okay, so we need to start heading to Sea—"
The pilot threw something at him and a mass of nets and weights pushed him into his seat.
"Oh, you've gotta be kidding me."
"I'm as surprised as you, hedgehog," Katella said through her helmet. "I really doubted that bribe would come through, but you know what they say: better safe than sorry."
