#aphobia cw

[dathen]

When I see people protest shipping aroace characters, I often see a hypothetical of “it’s like shipping a lesbian with a man” brought up, but that doesn’t really click with me

To me, it feels like taking a canon trans character, and then deciding you’re going to treat them as cis. It’s not ship wars: it’s erasure of extremely rare queer rep because they’re not willing to step outside whatever cookie-cutter dynamic they prefer, not willing to embrace the ESSENCE of the character and what makes them unique, not willing to dive into the potential of something they’re less familiar with.

People act like it’s just a “no fun allowed!” sign waved by fandom police. If shipping is the only way you know how to have fun in fandom, then I’m sure it seems that way. But wouldn’t it be so much better to expand your horizons, to embrace the rich complexity of humanity and relationships, rather than drawing a line in the sand between the types of queerness you feel are worth caring about?

[mar64ds]

sad that i couldn't include nick only being an "ally" to the aspecs that he finds palatable, which unfortunately is something i see constantly irl

[aro-culture-is]

Aro Culture is when you tell your bus driver "yeah I think [ex's name] put me off dating" and being told "yknow I think it's different for girls [I visibly have trans pins and he/it patch-] but you'll find someone eventually!" no, no I won't. I don't want to "find someone" in pretty cool beans by myself

.

[alexandraisyes]

Seeing lot of aroace hate on my dash today, what’s up with that? Why are we targeting aroace creators for “not being aro enough” and “not being ace enough” in their writing of fictional characters?

I’m a sex-repulsed asexual. I’m offline enough to understand that just because someone makes a fictional character one sexuality doesn’t mean they don’t respect the canon sexuality of that character. And it definitely doesn’t mean they don’t respect real life people. Why the fuck are we more worried about fictional characters than real people?

A fictional character can be whatever you want it to be. They can be trans, they can be intersex, they can be gay or lesbian or bisexual or even fucking aroace and it would have no impact on the real world because they only exist on your google docs. If we can make straight characters gay, and male characters trans, and change everything about them then we shouldn’t throw a fit when creators project their specific aroace spiciness onto an aroace character.

Yes! There is a very small amount of sex-repulsed rep! There’s a very small amount of romance repulsed rep too! That is an issue! But fanfiction writers are not the owners of the original media, and them writing fanfiction with an aroace character and making them demisexual and aroflux instead of the “media friendly sex-and-romance-repulsed aroace” is not the end of the world.

Creators are not obligated to write what you want, and have you ever once thought of how hard it is to find rep of the other types of aroace? Because there’s more than just sex and romance repulsed. I’ve never read a published novel or seen a movie where a character is openly cupiosexual or demiromantic or aceflux. The entire spectrum is under represented, and so claiming it’s just romance and sex repulsed is really shitty when if the media is going to put in an aroace character they’re going to make them romance or sex repulsed. Name three canonically cupiosexual characters and I’ll retract this statement.

If you can’t find the stories you want to read, write them yourself. Attacking aroace creators for not being “aroace the right way” is aphobic as fuck.

Prioritize real people over fictional ones.

[deadbeatdadjokes]

Ace ppl who are you killing first

“You just haven’t met the right person yet 😩🫣🤣”

“That just sounds like straight w extra steps 🤔🤨🤨🤔”

“Don’t worry! 99.9% of people change their mind when they get older 🥰✨💕🌈”

“*vague suggestion that the only reason society exists is bc people fuck* 😎”

“You don’t feel attraction??? Am I like 🥺🥺 that ugly to you?? 😭😭😭😭”

“Why? Did something like…happen to you…? 😬😬😬”

Other (do tell so we can throw tomatoes at them too)

Voting ended onSep 3, 2023

brought to you by all the things people have literally said to me in 100% earnest

[lizardsfromspace]

The most bizarre part of ace "discourse", then and now, is how so much of it was based on non-ace people pulling their own definitions of asexuality out of thin air, and deciding, when asexual people told them the real definition, that the one they made up is the "real" one and asexuals were changing it to confuse them or out of spite or something

I don't know, if I cobbled together a makeshift definition of a unfamiliar term in a couple seconds and later learned there was more nuance to it, I may accept that the thing I made up when I didn't know anything wasn't exactly right, not dig in my heels and shout demands that all those real ass people admit they're the thing I made up or be proven frauds

[aspecduality]

Anyone who claims 'no one cares if asexuals dont wanna have sex' i dare them to say that next time they are in a social gathering.

Like just next time they're at a bar or something with the squad and they start talking about people they're into or whatever just say "i dont want to have sex/I never want to have sex again/I've never had sex and never want to" and stick to that and if they ask why just keep saying "because I just dont want to" and experience the super invasive questions and incessant heckling and people telling you you're weird, a freak, or should see a doctor because clearly you have a medical issue

Yes, people DO care about asexuals not having sex. To a creepy amount honestly

[gillipop-plus]

hiii, do you have a screenshot/clip of scott telling someone they're wrong for headcannoning his character as aro?

i can do you one better and give you a direct link to his comment

https://www.tumblr.com/fogwitchoftheevermore/724232609602863104/im-right-about-this-btw-id-an-edit-of-the-this/replies/724277065508508698

the op has a userbox in their pinned with the quote, which is absolutely iconic imo. good for him

also fair warning there is someone on the notes with a url that's very close to scott's actual url (@\defonotsmaior) but the original comment was from scott himself