#arophobia cw

[aro-culture-is]

kinda vent and also arophobia and stuff maybe idunno

aro culture is apparently not being allowed to have facial expressions or else you are actually alloromantic and have a crush on everyone you have ever unintentionally smiled, laughed, or looked at

people have said stuff that has heavily implied this statment so many times it genuinly starting to make me uncomfortable with my face even existing YAYYY

@this-is-arophobia

[survivesurvivingwhump]

Whumper who weaponizes Whumpee's aromanticism? Assaulting Whumpee by telling them how "romantic" it is, putting rose petals on the bed, lighting candles, playing soft music, just to further torment Whumpee. (Whumper means nothing romantic by it, it's all to psychologically torture Whumpee)

oooohhhh i love that. i love love love that. i have such a soft spot for whump scenarios where an aro/ace/aroace whumpee is targeted for abuse that specifically aims at their identity.

the thought of how complicated it would be to explain to people after... not just the sexual assault but the how violating and traumatizing the forced romance aspects of the assault. all these trappings of traditional romance. the assault itself is slow and physically gentle. whumper openly tells people about it. about how they wined and dined whumpee, how they had this great night, and whumpee just walked away after and pretended like it didn't happen! heartless, cold, what an asshole.

and whumpee feels crazy. because they didn't consent to it. not any of it. but they... how do they even explain... everything whumper is saying to people is true. except for the part where whumpee never consented to any of it.

the aftermath is impossible. it's so confusing, so huge, so upside down. and it makes trusting kindness, intimacy, affection, gestures, feel so so dangerous. how do they explain? how do you even begin to explain?

[dathen]

I don’t have the patience or energy to engage with the “Murderbot isn’t actually aroace :) It doesn’t actually say it’s aroace using the word ‘aroace!’ :)” crowd getting noisier since the show started, but..

In the books, Murderbot references its confusion, repulsion, and deep disinterest re: sex/romance MUCH more than it does re: gender. Like I never got the same “I will throw myself out an airlock if you gender me” feeling from it, while “everything I’ve learned about sex and romance has been against my will” is brought up like a dozen times per book.

Yet the same people very protective of Murderbot being a nonbinary character will jump through a thousand hoops to insist aroace Murderbot is “just a headcanon” or “one of many possible readings.”

Both of these aspects of its identity are important, but how do people manage their cognitive dissonance between “guard the gender identity with your LIFE” and “um insisting it’s aroace is fandom policing :(( stop ruining other people’s fun”…?

[arowitharrows]

It's aromantic visibility day and I've been thinking about how far we've come as a community and also what I wish would change in society to make things just a little bit easier. So. I wish it were more common to have conversations about boundaries surrounding romance.

I wish people were more aware of the morality they tie to romantic love, and the inherent effect that has on how aromantic people are perceived. I wish I could tell my friends that the reason I can't be open about this part of myself is because I fear that they will see me as less human. After all, what is the meaning of life if not love? What makes us human if not our ability to fall in love? What is a story without romance?

I wish that I'll never have to read an article again that equates saying no to romance forever with being mentally ill, misguided and selfish. I wish that growing older and staying unpartnered weren't seen as a failure, a sign of instability and untrustworthiness. I wish people wouldn't assume that not feeling romantic love leaves a void in my life, it doesn't.

I wish people would put a bit more effort into learning about amatonormativity and what it actually means instead of brushing it aside. And I hope that these things get easier in the future, as we grow as a community and find more support around us by allies who care enough to listen.

[thedeafprophet]

whenever alloromantic people get really heavy into INSISTING that romantic relationships are more important then friendships and that you *need* a romantic relationship above all else for the needs it fills differently then friendship

it just tells me you probably don't value platonic relationships they way you should 🤷‍♂️

[oscconfessions]

If you headcanon every meeple device as aromantic i will assume you are arophobic

-anon who is aroace

.

[chuuyasdog]

Being aromantic and seeing people vent about not being able to get a partner and saying that life isnt worth living because of that is....weird. uncomfortable. Idk i dont like it. Makes me feel funny in a bad way. Like okay maybe i should just kill myself since i wont ever have a partner huh? Is my life worth nothing since im aromantic?

Most of the time, im okay, im happy even, with the fact im aromantic. I went through my mourning phase a couple years back when i realised. I thought i had accepted it. But then i see someone in a discord server im in say in the vent channel "oh if i dont get a girlfriend by 30 i will kill myself because i dont wanna be a sad lonely loser" and it brings all those feelings back.

And my feelings are conflicted on whether to be pissed off at the person/people venting about it, or to be upset that i will never fall in love. And it just makes me want to shout at them, scream at them, tell them what im saying in this post rn, but that would be cruel and insensitive to say to a vent post. So i say nothing.

[fymo-blogs]

Man, I love it when I bring up aroace characters' identities being ignored and a cishet tries to say 'Well the same thing happens to straight characters' /sar

Like, just because a character is in a straight relationship doesn't make them 'canonically straight' Mspec identies exist, y'know

So kindly stfu 🤗