how to fly
satoru gojo x f!reader
content: fear of heights + stairs. reader calls satoru the worlds strongest cunt and satoru's a little bitch but also kind of a lil sweetie. megumi + tsumiki kiddos too :))
an: based on a request I received from @luna0713hunter I hope you like it sweetie pie!!!
request: satoru helping reader get over a fear of heights/stairs
--
You love Satoru Gojo. Your partner in crime - since you were mission partners during your first year at Jujutsu Tech and now partners in everything else, that mattered anyways. Life, love, two very grumpy pre-teens. What’s not to love?
His affinity for being a little bitch.
He’s currently sitting on the porch of your tiny town house, ankles danglinging off the black tiles. His back is pressed against the angled roof, resembling the black cat that often sunbathes in your shared lawn.
You grab one of the sticks from the yard and throw it up, catching his attention. At the stick making contact with his face, he sits up, rubbing the now pink spot on his forehead.
“Ouch, sweetheart. You could have just hollered for me.”
“Get off. Now. We have to go pick up Megumi from school.”
“No, I love you? No light of my life, father of my children-”
“We don’t have children.”
“Yes, we do!” “They’re not our biological children, asshat. Can you just come down now? Please?”
You can feel it - the itching in your throat, the sweating in your palms, pins and needles burning in your stomach. Satoru’s just so, so high and just so, so close to the edge that even the sight of him makes you sick.
Logically, rationally - Satoru Gojo is the strongest. A fall from a few feet high wouldn’t hurt him and knowing him, he’d take it as an opportunity to start doing some next level gymnastics to show off to the old lady who lives across the street.
But fears aren’t logical or rational. Because in your heart of hearts, you know that Satoru will be okay if he falls. And you’ll be okay walking up and down the stairs and Satoru trying to take you on a date to the tallest building he can find so you two can get a view of the city would actually be very, very romantic.
But it isn’t. Not for you anyway. Because that sinking feeling, that chill down your spine returns every time he brings it up.
Logically, rationally - Satoru’s your partner, you’ve been together in everything since you were fifteen. A mere fear like this should be nothing when you've shared almost everything with him.
But it feels silly to tell him that you’re scared of heights when you two basically dance with death every time you leave the house. You’ve hung upside down in curses mouths, literally been stuck in the most harrowing of situations, but free suspension in the air is what gets you.
“Asshat? You wound me, doll. Now you have to come here and kiss it better.”
You can feel your eyes nearly boggle out of your sockets as you look up at him, smirking down at you. His blindfold is hanging loose around his neck - a habit of his whenever he’s around you. He just knows that his pretty blue eyes can make you do almost anything he wants, even climb onto a fucking roof to kiss him.
“Satoru. It’s almost ten past three. Megumi gets upset whenever we’re late.”
“Then make it quick! Climb up here and give me a little kiss and we can leave.”
You love Satoru Gojo. And you really, really hate his affinity for being a little bitch.
“How do I get up there? I'm not the world’s strongest cunt like you.”
“That’s two kisses now, pretty girl. And there’s a ladder up the side.”
You feel your knees wobble as you walk over, a silver, very rickety-looking ladder, mind you, propped up against the door.
You close your eyes, uncurling and curling your balls out of their little fists as you brace yourself to go get him. It’s just a ladder. It’s just a few steps, and then you’ll be on the roof, which is plenty safe. And Satoru’s right there. Nothing can happen to you if he’s right next to you and-
“Whatcha doing, Y/N?”
You look up to find Satoru’s little tufts of white hair peeking down at you, a glimmering smile still pressed on his face.
“Praying to the gods. Hoping they can make you less of an idiot."
“Three kisses now, my sweet. Quit insulting me!”
You shakily put your hands on the first rungs, your hands so clammy and sweaty that you can feel your grip shaking. He’s still watching you - rather laxly though since he’s literally on the phone with Ijichi.
“Yeah, yeah. You might have to go get Megumi. Y/N is taking forever on her ladder.”
“Well, I asked her to go on it. She has to come give me three kisses for insulting me before we leave to get him.”
“No, I am not messing with her and fine, we’ll go get him if you’re so busy.”
He clicks his phone off, shuffling around on the roof as he puts it back in his pocket. You’re nearly halfway there, your stomach a horrible mess of knots and the tears burning in your eyes.
When you reach the top, Satoru holds one hand out to you, which you begrudgingly take as you try your best to plant your feet on the ladder.
Don’t think about it shaking. Don’t think about falling back. Don’t think about the ladder breaking.
His face is a few feet away from yours, the smile on his face spread wide. You’re trying your best to blink away your tears, nearly heaving in front of him.
“Hi princess.”
“Satoru.”
“That’s a total of three kisses for me. For asshat, world’s strongest cunt, and praying for the gods to fix me. You should know by now that this problem is unfixable.”
“Evidently.”
“Four now, baby.”
You roll your eyes as you lean forward, pressing two kisses to each of his cheeks, one on his forehead, and a peck on his lips. You pull back quickly, getting ready to get the fuck off this ladder so fast, but he pulls forward, basically hanging his torso off the roof as he grabs your face, locking your lips together again. When he pulls apart, he’s smiling at you like there’s no tomorrow and the panic in your stomach is so bad that you want to vomit off the side of the roof.
“Let’s go get ‘Gumi. He’s probably pissed already.”
--
You lean against the cold glass, trying to soothe your headache as you watch Satoru harass Megumi in the pick-up area, a very horrible habit he had. Satoru, the charismatic freak he was, loves to talk to all of Megumi’s little friends, much to Megumi’s dismay.
He’s currently hanging Itadori and Megumi both by their ankles, swinging them around in the air, as they wait for Itadori’s grandpa sick. Even the sight of them, the tiniest bit above the ground makes you nauseous, making you hold your head between your knees.
You keep your head there for what feels like an hour and you know the two of them have returned when you can hear Satoru’s teasing and Megumi’s protests.
“Satoru. You’re so embarrassing.”
“Aw, Megumi-chan. Don’t talk like that to your father.”
“You’re not his father.”
“You’re not my father.”
You lift your head up to give Megumi a smile through a rear-view mirror, which he acknowledges with a nod when Satoru starts driving. Satoru mindlessly reaches over, locking his hands with yours as he talks to Megumi. The softness of his hand is comforting and you crack each of the knuckles on his hand, as you listen to Satoru and Megumi bicker.
When you reach home, Megumi running off into the house to pee, while you find Tsumiki home from her class, lying down across the porch. You lean against the back of the car as Satoru grabs Megumi’s backpack and joining you at your side.
“You okay, love?”
“Yeah, Toru. Why?”
“No reason. You were cracking my knuckles in the car. You only do that when you used to get all…anxious, when we started doing missions.”
“Oh. That was just retribution for earlier. You can be really annoying.”
“That’s one kiss for m-”
“No.”
He pouts as he drops Megumi’s backpack onto the curb, snaking his hands against your waist as he smirks at you. You can feel your heart drop in your chest as you realize what Satoru’s about to do.
“Wait, Toru don’t-”
You pinch your eyes shut as you feel the cold air and Satoru laughing in your ear. You can feel that there’s no ground beneath your feet and knowing Satoru fucking Gojo, he’s probably suspened the two of you so high in the air that you’ll vomit if you open your eyes.
“Open your eyes.”
You shake your head blindly, clinging on for dear life as you wrap your arms around Satoru’s neck and your legs around his waist.
“Sweetheart, this is kind of kink-”
“Satoru. Please, please put me down.”
“Where’s the fun in that? Look down, Megumi and Tsumiki look like little ants looking up at us.”
Little ants. Meaning your two tiny little pre-teens are so far that they look like ants. That you can’t even make their faces out. Meaning, Satoru took you so fucking high that you can barely even see people standing on the ground. You clench harder on his shirt, burying your forehead into his neck as you try to focus on his senses.
His smell, the feel of his hair in your hands, and the sound of his voice. Granted the latter isn’t quite helping when he’s telling you how high you fucking are and his stupid hands are the reason you’re in this situation, you try your best to stop it. Stop crying, stop panting, stop freaking out.
The second you sniffle, you hear all of the joking leave Satoru’s voice.
“Hey, sweetheart are you crying?”
You choke back your own tears, your voice breaking as you respond.
“N-no, Toru. Please put me down.”
“Love, hey. I’ll take you down right now, I’m sorry.”
You’re not sure when you feel your feet back on the ground, but you’re still clutching onto Satoru for dear life when you hit the curb. You’re only cognizant of the fact when Tsumiki and Megumi wrap their arms around your legs, their soft voices asking you if you’re okay.
You open your eyes to find the three of them with matching, concerned looks on their faces, Satoru’s jaw tight against his mouth. Tsumiki tugs on the bottom of your pants, her brown eyes staring back up at you.
“Do you want to eat ice cream, now?”
“Sure, Miki. Let’s go.”
She holds her hand out, leading you back into the house as you wipe away your tears, with Satour and Megumi following. You can hear the two of them bickering behind you, your head pounding too hard and your breaths too uneven that you can’t tell them to stop.
“What did you do, Satoru?”
“Nothing, ‘Gumi! I was just showing her the view.”
“One day, when she leaves you, I’m going to go with her.”
“Gumi.”
You sit down at the kitchen table, Megumi at your side as Tsumiki and Satoru grab the industrial tub of chocolate ice cream Satoru bought last week. You feel Megumi link his fingers with yours under the table, giving your fingers a squeeze as you press your head against the table.
You’re on the ground. You’re okay. You can’t fall because there’s nowhere to fall and you’re sitting at the kitchen table. Satoru’s here so you’ll be okay and nothing can happen.
You feel Satoru’s hands in your hair and you look up to find that he’s evicted a very-annoyed Megumi from his seat next to you. There’s four spoons on the table and the ice cream open. You reach forward first, the cooling sensation and Satoru next to you soothing the panic in your chest, the needles and pins in your stomach less strong.
“Are you okay, Y/N?”
“Yes, Miki. Thank you for the ice cream, sweet girl.”
She gives you a soft smile as the four of you eat the ice cream in silence, your breathing slowing down as you finish.
--
Megumi and Tsumiki run off after your little ice cream snack, the sun dipping into the horizon as you look out the window. Satoru’s in the kitchen, making Megumi and Tsumiki’s lunches for tomorrow.
No stairs today. You reach for the spare cabinet in the living room as pull out a pair of pillows and blankets for the night.
On most days, the stairs up to your bedroom are manageable. But after today - your entire foundation is off. Even one step up, and you know you’ll have a full-blown panic if you even try to get up there. You hear Satoru drop the spoon he was holding as he gives you a spare glance, the stack of pillows and blankets in your hand.
You watch his expression drop as he walks over to you, taking the pillows from your hands so he can hold you.
“Love. Are you really that upset with me that you’re going to sleep on the couch?”
“Satoru, I-”
“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I just wanted to show you how the city looked and I don’t know what I did wrong but-”
“It’s not that, it’s just-”
“You mean the world to me. I would never want to make you upset so please don’t sleep downstairs today. We can talk about it, you can slap me, but just-”
“Gojo.”
He’s quiet at the sound of his family name, nervous blue eyes peering into yours as he holds your hands. It’s his turn to shake, his usual smiley face so sad it makes you squelch. One thing you love about Satoru?
His love for others.
“Satoru. I’m not…mad at you. I just…can’t go upstairs.”
You watch his confusion spread across his face as he brings his hands up to cup your cheeks, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead before you keep talking.
“I…can’t. The stairs- and getting up there, it’s just…too much.”
“The stairs, sweet? What’s wrong with the stairs?”
“It’s not just the stairs. It’s the ladder and you hanging Megumi and Itadori in the air and sitting on the roof and taking me in the air and-”
“Y/N. Are you…scared of it? The stairs?”
You swallow hard as you press your head against his chest, your cheeks burning at the admission.
“Yes. And heights. And I know it’s stupid because we literally fight curses all the time and-”
“It’s not stupid.”
“It is and I don’t want to be scared of it, but I just…I just can’t help it, Satoru. It makes me panic, I want to throw up, and my hands get all sweaty-”
Satoru pulls his arms around your waist as he holds you up, crushing you in one of his warm hugs. You can hear him whispering against your ear, tears lightly flowing as he tells you it’s okay. The two of you stand there for a while, Satoru’s head pressed against your shoulder, his embrace warm.
“Sweetheart?”
“Yes, Satoru?”
“Can I…help you? You don’t have to be scared of this and I don’t want you to feel this way. I’ll walk you through it, slowly. You know I’d never let anything happen to you and I-”
You squeeze him hard, your chest burning at how sweet he can be.
“Please? But, can we start tomorrow? I just…need a day.”
“Yes, silly girl. We can start next year if we have to. Just let me sleep on the couch with you.”
“Not big enough, Toru.”
“I’ll sleep on the floor. Just lean your hand over the couch so I can hold it.”
“Okay.”
--
You and Satoru are standing on the lawn, three days later. Megumi and Tsumiki are lying on the porch, sunbathing like Satoru did on the roof a few days ago. They’re fully equipped - with ice cream, puke bags, and three different self-help books Satoru bought to help you get over your fear.
He’s so stupid, it’s cute.
“Okay, my sweet. I think you’re ready. Just a little bit in the air okay? I’ll take you up and just open your eyes. If you freak out too much, tell me and I’ll take you down.”
“Okay.”
Satoru snakes his hands arond your waist and squeezes, which immediately elicits a scream from you. You can hear Megumi and Tsumiki’s groans the second you stop, tiny little “you can’t be serious” and a “there’s no way” from the two of them.
“Princess.”
“What? How high are we? Oh my god, Toru- I’m going to vomit. I hate you. You’re stupid.”
“We haven’t even left the ground yet.”
You look down to find you and Satoru’s feet planted firmly on the ground and then look back up to find Satoru laughing at you. You flick the top of his forehead, rolling your eyes at him in response.
“You’re mean, Satoru.”
“You’re so silly, sweet girl. We haven’t even moved yet!”
“Well, screw you. You squeezed so I thought that we did!”
“I was just trying to reassure you.”
“Well, you’re stupid.”
“That’s two kisses for you~~” he sings, eyes gliting into yours.
“No.”
--
Slowly but surely, your fear of heights and the stairs starts to fly away. The pins and needles are little pinpricks now and every time the fear rises up in you, Satoru - his soft voice and warm hands - are always there to will it down.
Three months later, Satoru takes you to fly.
And you actually enjoy it.
--
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