Hi! I was wondering if I could ask for some headcanons of the ‘only one bed’ trope with the Olympians (or just whoever you feel comfortable with) please? I really love your writing!
There's Only One Bed: Olympian Edition
For the sake of this scenario, assume you are in the beginning/crush stage of the relationship. Just to add a little more tension.
You're traveling with your god/ess of choice when evening falls and you have to stop for the night. But uh oh! there's only one bed available! Whatever will you do?
Warnings: mentions/discussion of exorsexism in Artemis's part
🩷Aphrodite🩷
Okay, so no shot Aphrodite didn't do this on purpose. Oh nooo, there's only one bed, whatever will we doooo~
Aphrodite is very okay with this situation. She titters and falls back on the bed, patting the covers beside her invitingly.
"You're not going to make me sleep all alone now, are you, dearest?"
If you absolutely insist, Aphrodite will let you take the floor (like hell is she sleeping on the floor, are you out of your mind), but she'd really much rather you come and cuddle with her. And... perhaps do something else...? 👀
Aphrodite is a snuggly sleeper and will spend most of the night wrapped around you like an octopus. Her hair keeps ending up in your mouth. She smells absolutely delightful though and you wake up more rested than you've felt in years
⚔️Ares⚔️
"This is certainly... unforeseen. Well, nothing to be done for it, I suppose. I have slept in worse places. Come, perhaps I'll tell you about them as we prepare for bed..."
It barely even occurs to Ares to be awkward or reserved about it. Soldiers sleep in close quarters all the time. This is no different, really. And Ares is a gentleman. Even if he finds you attractive, he's perfectly capable of keeping his hands to himself.
If you're upset about it, Ares will be okay with taking the floor. He's not mad and nothing will change about his previous light demeanor, but he is internally deeply confused and a little hurt. Do you not like him or something :(
If you do sleep with Ares, he's perfectly pleasant and keeps everything above the belt unless you give him explicit signals. He smells like blood and steel and sweat, but it's not altogether unpleasant. If you snuggle up to him, Ares will hold you and be incredibly charmed <3
Just don't let him get started on those stories tho, or you'll be up all night
🏹Artemis🏹
Her reaction entirely depends upon gender. If you're a woman, she won't think twice about hopping into bed with you. She does it all the time with her hunting group, it's no big deal.
"You want left or right side? I'm cool with either."
She attends to her weaponry, oiling her bow and fletching arrows as needed, before she joins you. Artemis takes her cues from you, but assuming you have no problem with it, she presses up close to you and you fall asleep like a pair of nested animals.
If you're a man, she's a little more apprehensive.
"...You're not going to be weird about this or anything, right?"
It'll take Artemis a bit longer to warm up to men. She likes you, but she is still hesitant. Careful not to make any sudden moves! Embarrassingly (for her), her walls fall when she's asleep and she wakes up cuddled up to you anyway. She wakes up before you and you spend the next day wondering why Artemis seems so cranky (she's flustered lmaoo)
(This reaction is trans-inclusive btw. Artemis validates your gender so hard, she almost kicks herself onto the floor sksdsd) If you identify as non-binary/agender, Artemis's reaction will depend on your most common gender presentation and/or involve a lot of unconscious internal calculations about which side to assign you as. This isn't to be purposefully rude or transphobic, this is just an unconscious bias that she's not aware of yet! She will notice eventually and work on it, but probably not for a while without outside interference
🦉Athena🦉
Athena takes it in stride, like she takes everything else. It's very hard to rattle her lol.
"Hmm. Well, we'll just have to make the best of it. Things could certainly be worse."
She won't hear anything about either one of you taking the floor. The bed is plenty big enough for you both. Like Ares, she has the mentality of "soldiers sleep together, there's nothing weird about this." However, unlike Ares, she rarely puts this into practice and it's only when she's lying down next to you does it occur to her what she's actually doing.
Athena is so so awkward to snuggle with. She'll never initiate it as she doesn't even consider it as something she could possibly want. If you do it she's like ??? what are you doing. Now, this isn't to say stop, but you are definitely going to have to deal with Athena being very very rigid until she works out how this is all supposed to work.
Anyway, if you do cuddle with her prepare to never stop. She won't admit it (even to herself lmao) but she liked that more than she thought she would. She definitely thinks you're mad at her if you stop cuddling. Why would you hurt her feelings like that :(
❄️Demeter❄️
"This is absolutely unacceptable. I'll see that something is done about this at once."
If there's an option, say you're staying at an inn, Demeter will immediately storm off and intimidate the innkeeper into submission. She will even turn the owner out of their own bed. You disrespect the gods so by trying to make her and her companion sleep on the floor?
If there is no alternative, well. Demeter certainly isn't sleeping on the ground. She's much too old for that. There's only one logical solution. However she fails to actually say this out loud. With words. And acts affronted if you start to set up on the ground. Is she so awful that you'd rather take the floor?
In bed, Demeter keeps strictly to her side of the bed. She won't think to increase her body temperature until you start shivering and then she'll gently chastise you for not telling her in the first place. It takes a while for Demeter to warm up to people, so assuming you've hit the crush stage, she's already softened enough that the idea of snuggling is charming. She's a little apprehensive at first but quickly relaxes and can't help but pull you even closer.
🍇Dionysus🍇
Dionysus is completely cool with this. I mean, what did you expect, this is Dionysus we're talking about! He's taking this whole thing without even blinking and honestly, barely even considers a world where either one of you spend the night on the floor.
"Guess we're getting real close tonight, huh? Neat. It's been a while since I've had a good slumber party."
Insisting on sleeping separately will bring out the rare "pissed Dionysus." What do you mean you don't want to snuggle with him?? He thought you two were mates??? What the hell, man???? After that, he sure as fuck isn't giving you the bed and will give you the cold shoulder for the rest of the night. He's mostly over it in the morning but he is still upset. Forgiven but not forgotten. That one hurt, y'know? He has feelings too :(
Assuming you are fine with it, you're not going to get a chance to initiate snuggles. Dionysus has already thrown his arm around you and has launched into some story or other. Good luck getting him to shut up long enough to actually sleep lol
🪽Hermes🪽
This scenario is incredibly unlikely with Hermes. He knows the whole of Greece better than anyone (he's been up and down it enough times!) and he knows exactly the best places to catch a few winks for the night. Unless...? Yep, you guessed it! Hermes engineered this one as an excuse to snuggle with his crush. (That's you btw)
If you're at all perceptive, you might even clue in on the fact that he did it on purpose. He's oddly insistent on sharing, even though he usually brags about being able to sleep anywhere. He's talking a mile a minute. Like even faster than he usually does. You can barely get a word in edgewise because he will. not. shut. up.
"Just one bed? Hope you're not a blanket hog! Because I am! ...That was a joke, haha! I actually kick in my sleep."
He does. Btw. He also rolls around like a hamster on crack. The only way to stop him is by snuggling him, thereby pinning him down. Good luck getting him loose if you have to pee tho, that fucker holds on TIGHT.
Planned on confessing his crush to you that night, but chickens out unless you catch on and confront him about setting this all up. He'll find his courage. Eventually. It will take him approximately fifty tries and a swat upside the head with an oar via a very fed-up Charon. Look. he's great at delivering at message. Less so at talking about his feelings.
🔱Poseidon🔱
You're insane if you think Poseidon is sleeping on the floor. Anyway, you're also insane if you think Poseidon is letting you sleep on the floor. Usually a crush stage would imply some manner of awkwardness but Poseidon is VERY forward with his romantic interest.
"Come on and get comfortable already! What are you waiting for, an invitation? Well, here it is!"
This would be the catalyst for your relationship. Poseidon just can't help the way he's looking at you, the way his hands are wandering. If you reciprocate, he's thrilled and eager to ramp it up. Kiss him. You'll stun him for a second and make him blush.
Poseidon is a cuddler. He also snores. And there's no way in the world to make him stop. Enjoy!
⚡️Zeus⚡️
If there's an option, say you're staying at in inn, Zeus will immediately storm off and intimidate the innkeeper into submission. ...Hey, wait a minute, didn't we do that one? You're insane if you think Zeus is sleeping on the floor. Anyway, you're also insane if you think Zeus is letting you sleep on the floor. Wait, didn't we do that one too?
Zeus's reaction is a combination of Demeter and Poseidon. Assuming he can't get his way, Zeus tidily assumes you will be sleeping together and soundly forgets to inform you. Like Demeter, he'll get pissy if you try to set up elsewhere.
"And whatever do you think you're doing? I'll have none of that now. What kind of monster do you think I am, to turn you out of a warm bed?"
Like Poseidon, his hands start to wander. He won't blush if you kiss him, but he will laugh heartily and that's almost as good. The only way to fluster him is to goad him into admitting his feelings for you. You've never seen him so red and honestly no one else probably has either.
He also snores btw
