#assassin jaskier

[innocentbi-stander]

Alright we’re doing this, in the anticipation of season 2 I’ve been obsessing over the potential for a jaskier spin-off series

Like, obviously we need jaskier and geralt content, but can you imagine the sheer chaos, the opportunity for feral jaskier his own series would bring?

Some fun aspects might entail:

Plot ft. Spy/assassin jaskier casually causing chaos amongst courts and nobody putting the dots together that at every ball the great bard jaskier attends, somebody dies

Jaskier in a series of increasingly elaborate disguises, including a remarkably convincing noble lady that scares the shit out of Mousesack

Jaskier sneaking into Cintra to visit Ciri and tell her tales of witchers

A frankly insane number of sexual exploits that result in jaskier fleeing from many a town

Jaskier becoming grudging friends with Yen, bonding over their love of wine, bitching about geralt, and all the court gossip

The bard getting to show his own competency, even some badass assassin moments (I would 100% support jaskier having some kind of spy/assassin crew who all work together sometimes)

Jaskier starting many a bar fight (and finishing them, Melitele help him) over people shit talking witchers

A running gag of jaskier constantly avoiding geralt (post mountain of course) as the Witcher is apparently searching or st least asking after him

Jaskier accidentally swindling his way into some sweet sweet immortality from some increasingly ridiculous ways

Of fucking course we get to see the valdo Marx rivalry up close and personal, maybe jaskier even gets to take a swing at the smug bastard

I love the idea of jaskier having a network of completely bizarre people and creatures that he’s managed to befriend across the years

Just jaskier going on his own set of side quests and adventures, getting up to shit and all kinds of trouble, all the while looking fabulous along the way

Jaskier totally doing Fine without geralt, he doesn’t miss him at all, nope, nothing there to see

The dynamic duo of jaskier and essie (or Priscilla) fucking up oxenfurt

And we mustn’t forget the obscene potential of jaskier encountering other witchers, especially the other wolf witchers and the shit they could get up to without geralt’s knowledge

All in all now that I’ve thought about this I want it more than life itself, thank you for coming to my TED talk

If anyone would like to hear more of my ramblings in a part 2, let me know!

[handwrittenhello]

Nothing to Lose But My Secrets - Chapter 13

The LAST CHAPTER!! It’s been such a fun (and long) time writing this, I’m almost scared to see it end! But I hope everyone enjoys this absolute fluff (and retribution) filled epilogue! 

Teaser: 

“Marry me,” Geralt says, one hand propping up his head while the other is slung across Jaskier, stroking idly up and down every bit of skin he can reach. He tucks a stray lock of hair behind Jaskier’s ear, the tenderness in the gesture nearly bringing tears to Jaskier’s eyes.

Jaskier rolls over to face Geralt, the space between them nearly nothing, but fraught with heat and mingling breaths. “You already know I’m yours forever,” he muses, smiling. “Why the sudden want for a wedding?”

Geralt blushes. “Isn’t it enough for me to want to see you happy?”

Now it’s Jaskier's turn to blush. “That’s very sweet of you, but how would it even work?”

“Well, I haven’t attended many weddings, but I presume we would find someone to ordain, and plan a ceremony, and—”

“No,” Jaskier laughs, “no, I meant… more long-term.” He sobers then, a familiar anxiety rising in his stomach, one he’s become well acquainted with since taking the throne. “With you in Kaer Morhen and… me here in Redania…” He trails off. It’s something he's been putting off thinking about—and he doesn’t necessarily want to think about it now, but Geralt’s brought it up, and they do need to have this conversation.

Geralt clears his throat. “I was thinking…”

When he doesn’t continue, Jaskier raises an eyebrow. “You were thinking…?” he prompts.

(check the notes for the link!) 

[witchersjaskier]

AU!!! Jaskier is a stable boy and Geralt is the grumpy™️ but also soft™️ Prince who spends a little bit TOO much time in the stables

geralt is the second son of king vesemir and basically cares not about the crown as his older brother eskel is the crown prince. he just spends his time training or taking care of roach.

he has to leave with his family to meet queen calanthe tho, and knows roach can't come but no one will be able to touch her while he's gone. he just hopes she'll be fed but when he returns, roach is as pretty as before, her mane now braided with some yellow flowers

he has no idea who's taking caste for his horse, the mare no one can touch, and there's no way to catch the stable boy, as geralt's busy with lessons/training when the stables are full

he finally sneaks out one day in the morning, and finds the prettiest man he's ever seen tending to roach, calling her a pretty lady and braiding flowers into her mane. geralt obviously uses anger to mask his crush and basically screams at the stable boy who, susprisingly, screams right back and calls geralt a dick. with balls.

eskel who hears is, is too amused to actually punish the sassy stable boy and introduces himself. the stable boy, jaskier, doesn't back down even knowing geralt is a prince, just saying that he never knew a prince could be such an angry asshole. geralt is inevitably charmed by someone insulting him.

they start spending time together in the stables, bonding over roach and love for other animals. geralt knows almost nothing about where jaskier came from but he knows he's sweet and gentle and kind, a bit sassy, a bit angry at nobles and royalty, a bit sharp. delightfully fearless as well

jaskier, in turn, comes to love the quiet price who hides his shyness with anger and stoicism, but loves his horse and likes to pet stray cats and visit the villagers. it makes everything very complicated, since his masters are waiting for his report back to the creed, with news on whether or not the royal family is using the apple

5+ headcanons for aus!

[bamf-jaskier]

U know what idea I love?

okay so I’ve 100% read fanfictions that r kinda based on this premise (and if you want me to rec them, let me know!) but I want Jaskier to be a bard but Dragon Age style. For people that don’t know, a Dragon Age bard is just like a normal bard, they go to courts, compose music and generally tell the stories of the world, however they also acts as assasins and spies of the highest order, inflitrating courts and selling their secrets to the highest bidder while also killing however they need to. Their facades as happy-go-lucky musicians keep everyone fooled until it’s too late. 

So, imagine Jaskier as a bard who decided he had enough of the courts and the intrigue and left it all behind because he did not want to just spill secrets to a faceless noble but instead tell stories that will last generations. He wouldn’t be in trouble or anything with other bards for ‘abandoning’ his training but he would most likely be seen as weak. 

Bards are trained in dual sword wielding and archery for weaponry and I can totally see Jaskier using butterfly swords/Baat Jaam Dao cause he wants to remain inconspicious and achery is little bit too obvious, Baat Jaam Dao are small and easy to conceal. The fighting style is all about overcoming your opponent with fast, agile strikes, and disarming them, not killing them. I think this fits Jaskier really well. For reference, here’s what the swords look like: 

Jaskier could totally hide them. Also, this sword idea may or not be inspired by a move from the Dragon Age series called the Butterfly where you slash the enemy’s wrists and then their throat immedialy after. (Please go read Dragon Age: The Masked Empire)

Bards are also expected to be able to complete a mission in private, say, at a banquet and then return to being the life of the party, not a hair out of place and no one even noticing you are gone. And oh god, I love this idea so much. 

Like Jaskier doesn’t really take jobs anymore unless they strike him as somehting that needs to be done, morally speaking, and he actually doesn’t really and try and hide it from Geralt. So Jaskier tlak all the time but never about his past but Geralt never asks about his past so Jaskier basically pretends it doesn’t exist. 

And Jaskier is really more trained for dealing with human monsters so it’s not like he’d be of any help for a kikimora hunt or whatever, that’s not really in his wheelhouse. 

Ugh just imagine if Geralt gets captured or incapacitated, something that Jaskier has never had to deal with so he steps in and just takes whatever the threat is OUT. Geralt is surprised and horny. 

Let me know if u want more of these headcanons or something

[welcometoshiphell]

Anyone got any Feral!Jaskier, BAMF!Jaskier, Assassin!Jaskier, and/or Witcher!Jaskier fic recommendations because I'm thirsting for that shit atm

[geraskierficrecs]

New chapter up with the scene everyone loves:

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[sennextheassasinkingoflight]

From my newest WIP

“Thank you, kind witcher.” He startles some. He shouldn’t be surprised that she knows he’s a witcher. But there is something prickling on his skin. He trusts his instincts, but he needs into the manor. “Of course my lady.” She holds her hand out to him palm down. He understands, takes it in his free hand and kisses it lightly. She giggles a bubbly laugh from her throat at the act. She smells strongly of Lilac and Daffodils. “I am Lady Narcissus Oszust. Thank you for retrieving these.” She takes the items with her free hand. “The necklace was my mothers’ and the broach, my grandmothers.”  Her voice is a little deep for a woman but he doesn’t question it. He’s been around the continent enough to have met many people that seemed odd. Men with voices like women, women with faces like men, women with hair short as a man and men with hair as long as a woman. He lets it be without much thought. He’s seen many things. “How may I repay this debt?” She asks lightly. He smiles a little. He feigns uncertainty for a moment. “Oh, well. Perhaps, My lady... You see, I am looking for a friend of mine and I have reason to believe he may be at the celebration tonight, and I find myself, sadly, without an invitation.”

[handwrittenhello]

“What are you talking about? Jaskier, it’s me,” the witcher says, brow furrowed, and takes a half step forward. Julian flinches back, and he stops. “Jaskier,” he says carefully, “do you know who I am?”

“A witcher,” Julian answers. “Your eyes, they’re—why are you calling me that?”

“Because it’s your name,” the witcher explains, sounding sad.

“My name is Julian,” Julian contradicts him—though his heart inexplicably stings whenever he hears Jaskier fall from the witcher’s lips, as if it’s something special.

“No, that’s a lie that bastard Stregobor told you,” the witcher snarls. “Your name is Jaskier, and he’s been manipulating you for years. He kidnapped you a few months ago, and we only just managed to get to you.”

Julian shakes his head, eyes wide. “You’re crazy. Guards!” he yells, stumbling away from the witcher.

“Jaskier, wait!” The witcher darts forward and snags him by the arm—his hands are warm through the fabric of Julian’s doublet. “I’m not lying. Look at my soulmark,” he says, tugging up his own sleeve to reveal an intricate pattern, poppies and lavender entwined.

Julian stares at it. It looks so familiar—but why? He’s sure he’s never seen that pattern before in his life. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

The witcher frowns. “It matches yours.”

Ah. “I’m afraid you’re wrong,” Julian says tremulously, as the witcher pushes up his sleeve to reveal the jagged scar where it should be. “I don’t have a soulmate. Whatever connection might have been there—it’s been broken.”

“No,” the witcher whispers, gone pale. “No, Jaskier, no—”

--

Chapter 12 of Nothing to Lose But My Secrets is up!