Seeing as Book 3 of Blades of Light and Shadowis releasing for VIP and releases for the rest of us soon, I made an edit of Asterin in Book 3 like I did for Book 2. Ta-da!
For those curious this is Asterin in Book 1 and Book 2
Word Count: 2k
Characters/Relationship(s): Asterin Nightbloom, Tyril Starfury, Tyril x MC, Mal Volari x MC, Aerin Valleros x MC, Mal Volari x Tyril Starfury
Genre/Tags: Angst, Hurt no comfort (yet), aggressive parallels
A/N: This miniseries is very heavily inspired by Epic the Musical and therefore the Odyssey. This part is inspired by, shockingly, the song No Longer You. The series should be three parts so stay tuned.
Part 2, Part 3
“How could we have left him?!” Imtura exclaimed.
“We didn’t leave him,” Nia said, seeming just as angry as the warrior. “She kept him there.”
“Who is ‘she’?” Mal asked, his grip on Tyril’s shoulder tightening.
Tyril sighed, looking up from where he’d been sitting on a large boulder with his head clutched in his hands. As soon as the light had faded and they realized Asterin wasn’t with them, the whole group had fallen into a panic. None of them seemed to express fear nor grief in the same way which only sent them into a downward spiral thanks to the chaos seeded among them.
Tyril had fallen back into the same methods and emotions he’d used when Asterin disappeared: desperation. His mind was already shuffling through every story, legend, and even rumor he’d ever heard. Unfortunately, only one fit the situation.
“’She’ is Asin,” Tyril answered. Nia and Aerin must have came to the same conclusion seeing as Nia stared firmly at the ground and Aerin crossed his arms. “A rarely spoken of goddess. Scholars have always been conflicted as to why, but she was sentenced to fall in love with any who arrived on her island, which is also its own realm. Those she falls in love with are trapped there until Nilfira decides to intervene. It could have been any of us, but Asterin must have been the one she fell in love with.”
“Maybe you didn’t notice but none of us can realmwalk,” Aerin pointed out. He glared at Tyril like it was his fault they were in this situation and Tyril barely resisted the urge to leave him in a ravine. “How are we supposed to get to him?”
“Even if we could realmwalk, it’s impossible to find Asin’s realm,” Tyril retorted.
“So what, he’s just trapped there?” Mal asked. Tyril put his hand over Mal’s. The other man was clearly holding back tears and Tyril was in the same sitution.
“No, no way, I refuse to accept that,” Imtura scoffed. “There’s nothing you can’t find as long as you look for it. There’s always a course to plot, we just need a map.”
“You can’t plot a course through realms,” Tyril said.
“She may be right,” Aerin realized.
“Really?” Imtura replied.
“Maybe we can’t plot a course, but we could if we knew where it was,” Aerin said. “There is one man who may be able to find it for us. The Seer of Andreas.”
“Speaking to the Seer of Andreas drives people insane,” Tyril argued.
“Unless you have the proper motivation,” Nia added. “Think about it. Every story where people survived speaking to the Seer they were motivated by something other than power: Agnarr the Red wanted to protect his clan, Lianna was there with another only to fulfill her oath and uphold her honor, Perin was there for duty, and Ambrose for love. We’d be there because we love Asterin, not for power or glory.”
“Would that be enough?” Aerin questioned.
“It has to be,” Tyril replied.
It was an awful plan. But it was no worse than some of the other plans they’d had, including charging into the Shadow Realm headfirst while missing a member of their party. That plan had resulted in saving Morella. Perhaps this one could save Asterin, a task infinitely more valuable.
“I need you to stop talking myths and start talking facts,” Imtura spoke up.
“The Seer of Andreas can see everything,” Nia explained. “He doesn’t just see the future he sees every possibility of the future and the past. Most people who talk to him are driven insane under the weight of what he says assuming he even speaks to them. But a few have survived.”
“Sounds like a plan,” Mal nodded and squeezed Tyril’s hand, standing up from the log. “Where is this Seer?”
“…another realm,” Nia admitted.
“So we’re back on the Realmwalking problem,” Imtura sighed. “Does anyone know where Valax went off to?”
“Actually,” Mal hesitated. Then he pulled a small cloth from his belt, that when unwrapped revealed a small vial of something red.
“Is that blood?” Tyril asked. He stood up to examine it closely and came to the conlusion Mal was indeed carrying around a vial of blood.
“It's Asterin's blood,” Mal clarified. Each of them stared at him in silence. “What? He gave it to me in case of an emergency!”
“He didn't tell me that,” Tyril said, looking at the vial over Mal's shoulder.
“Nor I,” Aerin agreed. “Why would neither of you say anything?”
“He made me swear to secrecy,” Mal explained.
“And thats the promise you keep?”
“Okay you know what you little sh-”
“Would you two stop bickering and focus?” Nia snapped. “Your jealousy issues come later, we need to find the Seer.”
“Can you use the blood to open a portal?” Imtura asked. Nia took the blood from Mal and clutched it in her hands like she could feel Asterin within it.
“I suppose we’ll find out,” Nia said
Not a day later their entire party spilled onto the ground of a cavernous temple. The entire inner chamber they’d fallen into was carved into the stone of whatever realm they were in. The ceiling was held up by stone columns, the stretches between them made of a white crystal that reminded Tyril of the archive in Undermount. There was not even a hint of light other than the teal fire in the braziers lining a walkway.
The walkway extended halfway over a pit so deep it seemed to be a void, a void with more turquoise light curling in tendrils, all arcing toward one figure. At the end was a figure partially obscured by shadow. He was tall but incredibly frail, wrapped in simple hooded robes.
“You made it after all,” The Seer hummed as they all scrambled to their feet. The seer turned around and Tyril felt a shiver run down his spine. It was an entirely involuntary reaction to something Tyril couldn’t quite name. Maybe it was how the Seer’s face was obscured by his hood, washing his face in shadows. It almost looked like he had no face, if not for his eyes glowing green. “I suppose I should welcome you to Andreas.”
This was it. If they failed here either Asterin would be lost or they’d be too mad to look for him.
“Great Seer,” Nia stepped to the front of the group and held out her hands in a gesture both placating and awed. “We humbly request your guidance, we desperately need help fin-”
“I know of whom you seek,” The Seer replied. Every word he spoke was completely flat and emotionless. It wasn’t apathetic, something more like tired. “I only wonder if you do.”
“What does that mean?” Imtura asked.
“This is not the first time your party has made it to Andreas in search of your friend,” The Seer told them. They all exchanged glances of varying confusion, alarm, and curiosity. “I only wonder which friend it is you seek.”
“Asterin?” The Seer continued. “Yet which version of Asterin? Asterin of Riverbend? Asterin Nightbloom? Asterin Volari? Asterin of the Great House Nightbloom? Asterin Starfury? Consort and Prince Asterin Valleros? Asterin, Avatar of the Dreadlord? Asterin of the Ash Empire?”
Each name felt like a punch to the gut. Many he could not pinpoint but of course he could a few. Asterin Volari. Asterin Starfury. Mal was breathless beside him and Tyril’s mind was spinning. Asterin Valleros. Aerin was wide eyed and conflicted. His eyes sparkled with hope and fear all at once. Avatar of the Dreadlord. Nia looked sick, Aerin along with her.
“Maybe it is not Asterin at all. Is it Raine? Aurelian? Va'or? Odette? Maiele? Myrdan? Aemyraithe?”
“Great Seer, we do not know these names,” Nia claimed.
“You do,” The Seer replied. “Though perhaps not you. Tell me then? Which name do you want to find?”
“Asterin,” Aerin said. His voice was tinged with desperation that for once aligned his interests with Tyril’s. Even Mal looked the same.
“Which Asterin?”
Each of them hesitated. Asterin used the name Asterin of Riverbend and Asterin Nightbloom interchangeably. The wrong name could lead them to man they didn’t know.
“You do not even know yourselves,” The Seer realized. “I cannot blame you. There are more Asterins than you could fathom.”
“Right, and you can see them all?” Mal snarked.
“I see everything, Mal Volari,” The Seer tilted his head. “I see your desperation, I see you recklessly offering your life to save your friends, I see Mal Starfury and Mal Nightbloom, I see how you look at Asterin, I see the light leave your mother’s eyes and I see your fear that one day you will be in that bed yourself with your loves standing over you with faces unchanged.”
Mal looked like he’d been slapped as his legs nearly gave out. Tyril found it difficult to breathe as he stared at him. Mal had spoken of his mother and how he’d sacrifice himself for Tyril and Asterin in a heartbeat. He’d even tried before. But the last piece was something Tyril had never even guessed.
“Mal…?” Tyril’s voice was barely a whisper but Mal still looked at him with an apology clearly on his lips.
“I see you Tyril Starfury,” The Seer continued. “I see blue turning to gray, I see you alone in a cold palace, I see you at a warm hearth with family by your side, I see your Dinvalir’s fear as she is frozen, I see you standing alone against the shadows, I see Tyril Volari, I see your Uluvalir screaming for you in chains, I see your dread as your failure strikes and cuts down those you love.”
His failure. Kaya. Alone and with family. Asterin tortured in that dungeon. Tyril had to tense his muscles to keep from shaking where he stood. He felt empty, as if his mind had fallen over the edge of the walkway and into the void.
“I see you, Aerin Valleros,” The Seer said. “I see how badly you wish to choose a name of your own, I see how you cling to your beloved, I see how badly you want to change but I see your fear you cannot, I see your eyes turning black, I see you standing over your silver haired elf with red staining your hands, I see your father’s grief, I see you watching a wedding you will never experience.”
For the first time in his life Tyril saw tears in Aerin’s eyes. He stumbled back but his knees still gave out, leaving him kneeling in defeat.
“I see Asterin Nightbloom cradling his brother in his arms,” The Seer warned. “I see his eyes turn black as he sits upon a throne of shadows, I see him scream as he lays waste to Morella, I see him burning with light from the inside out, I see him blessed in a home with the men he loves, I see a flaming sword in his chest, I see him bleeding on a dungeon floor, I see him on the edge of a cliff as a woman pleads with him to return.”
Tyril’s sword fell from his hand onto the stone. He absorbed every word but could not fathom any of it. Nearly every road for Asterin ends in tragedy. Why him? Asterin deserved to have everything he wanted and more. Not only had he saved the realms, but he saved the people around him. He brought light to shadows, literal and metaphorical. How could the Light not repay him in kind?
“I see every one of these worlds,” The Seer. “I will begin your journey by leading you to Asterin Nightbloom. But I will not tell you which path you are on. The world you live you must choose. Pray you choose correctly. Pray that at the end of the path, you are the same person who stepped onto it.”
Every time I think about Asterin I want to cry. He was already a victim of unspeakable tragedies but he was still happy, he wanted to adventure, he laughed and smile and was brave enough to take on any problem. Then he became a hero, and had to take on everyone else's problems.
He was betrayed, he lost his birth and foster parents, his house is gone, he was abducted, tortured, experimented on, had to save himself, lost a year of his life, spent time bound to the very woman who did those things to him, had to reorganize his friends only for them to be at each other's throats and see his boyfriends moved on without him, forgave someone he loves only for them to abandon him, doesn't fit in with elves or humans or orcs, has the fate of the realms resting on his shoulders twice, spent most of his time comforting his friends about his abduction and solving their problems all while ignoring his own.
And he goes through all of it with a smile of his face. He's the Savior of Morella. That's what he has to do.
He wanted adventure. Now he wants to rest. But he may never get to.
Characters/Relationship(s): Asterin Nightbloom (MC) x Tyril Starfury
Genre/Tags: Hurt/comfort
Summary: During Chapter 8, Tyril finds out Asterin is not only hiding something, but went to worrying lengths to keep the secret.
A/N: pspspspsps actual character lore pspspspsps
Perhaps it was cliche and overly romantic, but something about helping Tyril shed his armor—along with stripping Mal of his armor too earlier—just made everything make sense. Everything fell into place. This was how it was supposed to be. This, this was right. After weeks of Asterin stumbling through each day, constantly trying to catch up and adapt to everything new and different around him this was something unchanged and beautiful.
Tyril’s skin against his, his strong fingers brushing Asterin’s skin as they fought with the buckles and fastenings holding Asterin’s armor and weapons was a feeling he could never forget. Tyril’s lips against his felt like a meeting of souls, something profound and incomprehensible that wasn’t meant for mortals. When Asterin’s shirt finally hit the floor and he felt Tyril’s hand on his chest he finally felt like himself again.
Until Tyril’s fingers stopped and his lips froze and he pulled away to look down. He was carefully holding the pendant of one of the necklaces Asterin normally wore beneath his shirt. One chain was simple and just served to hold the ring Aerin had given him so long ago. Thankfully Tyril didn’t seem to question that one. But the second one he was studying carefully, turning the pendant over in his hand with his brow furrowed.
The small charm was fairly unassuming, just a round pink stone set into twisting metal almost like a cage. Most would assume it was something simple, an accessory or something of sentimental value. That was what Mal had assumed when he saw it. Still, the way Tyril looked at it made Asterin nervous.
“I know this…” Tyril muttered. “What is it?”
“It’s just a necklace Tyril,” Asterin chuckled. He tried to pull the other elf back into a kiss, partially because he wanted to move on and partially to distract him, but Tyril pulled away.
“No there’s magic in this,” Tyril shook his head. “I can feel it.”
“It’s a little protection charm Kade gave me before I left,” Asterin lied easily. But Tyril just switched from glaring at the amulet to glaring at him. Asterin shrank a little under his gaze but Tyril didn’t look away.
“No it isn’t,” Tyril argued. “If it was you would have said so. What is it?”
“Tyril-”
“Answer me.”
“Please-”
“Answer me!”
Asterin flinched back away from Tyril, ripping the pendant from his hands. He just barely caught himself from raising his hands as if to defend himself. He squeezed his eyes shut as Tyril’s voice morphed into another in his head and dragged memories to the forefront of his thoughts that he wanted nothing to do with. The silence that fell was deafening as both them realized what exactly they’d just done.
“I’m sorry,” Asterin mumbled.
“No, I am,” Tyril protested immediately. He offered his hand and visibly relaxed when Asterin immediately took it. "I didn't mean to scare you. That's the last thing I ever want."
“I know,” Asterin said. “Trust me, I know. It’s okay.”
“Stop saying it’s okay,” Tyril replied. He clutched Asterin’s hand in both of his. “Me scaring you like that is abhorrent. But I am worried about you. That’s an Amulet of Rotem isn’t it? It’s an illusion charm. I know things have changed but we’ve never hidden things from each other. I shudder to think you feel the need to hide things from me and lie to me now.”
"...you're right," Asterin confessed. He kept his voice hushed. He wasn't sure why. Maybe he thought if he could barely make out his own words they wouldn't be real. "It's an illusion charm. I got it from the Royal Archives with Kade. It makes me looked how I did before Valax."
"Do you look different now?" Tyril asked, matching Asterin's tone. Asterin nodded. "How?"
Asterin tried to answer but the words were so quiet not even their shared elven senses could pick it up. He wasn't even convinced he said anything at all. How could he say something out loud? How could he think about it long enough to give voice to his pain? Tears pricked the corners of his eyes as his frustration grew until finally he squeezed his eyes shut and took the amulet off.
There was no flash of light like he was used to with magic but he surmised from Tyril's sharp intake of breath that everything was now on display. He didn’t even need to look. He’d spent enough time staring at the scars in horror before making the request of Nia upon finding her again.
The most subtle were the pinpricks dotted all over his wrists and neck. They could almost be mistaken for freckles. Sometimes he could even pretend that’s all they were. But those were the simple ones. Also scarring his wrists were jagged cuts, lined up one after the other, and on his palms as well. With the charm off Tyril would also be able to see the way his hands shook now, a tremor he still couldn’t explain nor remedy. He assumed it had to do with the damage to his hands and wrists. A harsh claw mark was emblazoned across his face, a hair’s breadth away from his eye.
But worst of all were the last two. On his chest were three precise lines, two that started near his soldiers and went inwards until they met and went straight down in a “Y” shape. And on his back were the burns. At least, he thought they were burns. He had no way of knowing for sure. Tyril’s fingers traced the scar on Asterin’s chest so softly Asterin could barely feel his fingers. It still made him shiver though. Tyril immediately froze but Asterin shook his head.
“No it’s, it’s okay,” Asterin said. Not only that but it was kind of nice. He was almost reverent in the way he moved over them. He knew logically it was some form of horror, maybe even guilt, but it felt so nice to not have them treated as something disgusting and wrong. Like Asterin saw them.
“You don’t remember any of this?” Tyril whispered.
“That’s the scary part,” Asterin replied. “I don’ remember a thing she did to me. All I have are the scars.”
Finally Tyril’s hand came to the marks down Asterin’s face. He traced them with just as much care as the others. He leaned up and kissed Asterin’s forehead, right over the scars.
“You look just as beautiful as I’ve ever seen you,” Tyril told him. “At the masquerade, in your armor, the day we met, even in nothing at all.”
The words made Asterin’s breath hitched. He didn’t feel beautiful. He felt damaged and broken, like something had been taken from him. His pride he supposed. He used to feel beautiful. He didn;t now. He replayed Tyril’s words in his head to try and get through to himself only to snicker.
“Are you laughing at me?” Tyril’s looked at him baffled.
“The day we met, huh?” Asterin teased.
Tyril’s face turned purple and suddenly he was very interested in the crumbling walls of the room.
“And I thought you found me irritating,” Asterin joked.
“I did,” Tyril claimed. “That didn’t mean I was blind.”
Asterin laughed, hand covering his mouth to not be too loud. But Tyril moved his hand and squeezed it.
“You haven’t laughed much these last weeks,” Tyril explained. “I want to hear it.”
“Has it been that obvious?” Asterin asked. Tyril made a so-so motion and Asterin sighed. “I’m trying. But I don’t know if I’ll ever be that man who got dragged through the portal. The, the man you and Mal fell in love with.”
“Is that why you were so scared for us to see your scars?” Tyril asked.
“Maybe,” Asterin muttered.
“Asterin…”
“I was scared if you saw the proof of everything it would be like a walking breathing reminder of the past year. How much you two have been fighting, how much we've all changed, how much I’ve missed and, and how much I’ve changed. I didn’t want you guys to see a different me and, and not love me anymore.”
Asterin's eyes were firmly on the floor as tears gathered within them. Tyril finger hooked under his chin and tilted his face up so Tyril could pull him into a kiss so passionate Asterin didn’t know how he ever doubted him.
“Oh,” Asterin whispered.
“Are you still Asterin of Riverbend?” Tyril asked. “Are you still Asterin Nightbloom, even if you’re a different version of him?”
“Yes,” Asterin nodded. It was the one thing he was sure of. Clinging to his identity, even scraps of it, was all that kept him sane these days.
“Then I love you, just as much as I ever have,” Tyril promised. “If not more. I want to spend the rest of our lives together, all three of us. Scars or pain won’t change that.”
“I love you too,” Asterin grinned. “Sorry, just couldn’t listen to that whole speech without saying it.”
“I’ll always enjoy hearing it,” Tyril chuckled.
“Hey you can laugh too! I didn’t know you had it in you.”
“You spend too much time with Mal.”
“You’ve spent more time with him.”
“I’m aware, it’s too late for me.”
Asterin laughed again as he leaned over to kiss Tyril once more, hands back on his chest. He nudged Tyril back until the mage’s back was on the ground with Asterin grinning between his legs and leaning over him.
“I think we have some unfinished business,” Asterin hummed. “Shall we finish it?”
Word Count: 2k
Characters/Relationship(s): Asterin Nightbloom (MC) x Mal Volari x Tyril Starfury, Asterin Nightbloom x Aerin Valleros
Genre/Tags: Hurt/comfort, nightmare
Mal had felt Asterin moving around in his sleep, but that wasn’t uncommon. He always tended to wriggle through the night and Mal and Tyril just had to try and sleep through it. Mal sighed and rolled over as best he could with Tyril’s arm slung over the both of them and tried to fall back asleep but then he heard the worst sound he’d ever heard: a blood curdling shriek from Asterin.
“MAL!” Asterin screamed.
Mal was up in less than a heartbeat, checking Asterin over while Tyril cased the room, sword already out of the sheath that had been laying on the ground next to the bed. There wasn’t a threat but Asterin was covered in sweat and panting, thrashing like he was restrained to the bed. Oh shit.
“It’s okay, come on Rin, wake up,” Mal shook him a little but it didn’t work.
Mal shook him harder and the next thing he knew his back was against the mattress, Asterin looming over him and breathing heavily with the dagger from under Mal’s pillow against Mal’s throat, hard enough to draw the slightest amount of blood.
“Hi?” Mal tried, hands up in surrender.
Asterin blinked hard, like he wasn’t fully awake yet and when he did his eyes widened and he threw the knife like it burned him. He scrambled off Mal to the foot of the bed and would have fallen off if Tyril hadn’t caught him.
“Oh gods, gods I’m so sorry Mal, I’m so sorry,” Asterin was still breathing heavily and his eyes bounced around the room to every shadow.
Mal lit the lamps on the nightstands and Tyril lit the fire in the fireplace with a wave of his hand. Asterin relaxed just a little. Before Mal could say anything the door burst open and Aerin stormed in, knife of his own in hand.
“I’m okay,” Asterin assured him, apparently having figured out what the disgraced prince was there for much faster than Mal. Asterin held out his hand and Aerin crossed the room to take it. “Just a nightmare. I just, I need a minute with them, okay?”
Aerin hesitated, glancing at Mal like he was the one to hurt Asterin. The actual audacity of this guy. Mal was perfectly happy for Asterin don’t get him wrong, but he had no idea what Asterin saw in this guy.
“Are you sure?” Aerin asked.
“Aerin, I’ll be fine, I promise.”
Aerin hesitated again but he nodded, shooting both Mal and Tyril a glare before leaving the room, making sure to shut the door behind him at least.
Mal crawled down the bed and settled on his knees in front of Asterin while Tyril stood behind Asterin with his hand on Asterin’s back. There was still panic in his eyes, the gold shining with barely concealed tears. Mal offered his hands, not wanting to touch Asterin without permission. He didn’t know what the nightmare was about but Asterin had screamed his name in terror and then held a knife to his throat. Turned out he didn’t need to worry as Asterin grabbed for his hands desperately. His grip was worryingly tight but Mal could take it. He rubbed his thumbs on the back of Asterin’s hands.
“What happened kit?” Mal asked.
“The year,” Asterin whispered and Mal barely caught his wince. “There’s…there’s something I haven’t told you guys yet.”
“You never have to be afraid to tell us,” Tyril assured him.
“I, I wasn’t asleep,” Asterin confessed. “I just thought I was. While me and Valax were stuck in that storm she gave me back my memories. I-I almost went insane with the pain, I was desperate I…”
“Screamed for us,” Mal realized. He’d already felt guilty for not finding Asterin before the elf had to free himself, even more when he made that stupid comment about Asterin just sleeping through it. Now it wa really biting him in the ass. His guilt and shame increased tenfold just sitting there listening to Asterin’s admission.
“Yeah…” Asterin admitted. “I-I was hallucinating, I kept thinking I was seeing or hearing you but, but then i-it was gone. And I was alone again.”
“Gods, Asterin,” Mal muttered.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” Tyril asked in a hushed voice.
“I didn’t want to hurt you,” Asterin answered, staring down at his hands in Mal’s instead of looking at either of them. “You already felt guilty enough, I didn’t want to make it worse.”
“I don’t give a damn how we feel,” Mal said. “That year was hell for you. If you need to talk about it you talk about it, no matter how it makes us feel. Be pissed, be sad, be scared, be anything you need to be. We’re staying right here no matter what. Right elf boy?”
“Of course we are,” Tyril swore. “I’m almost offended you even asked.”
Asterin’s breath was shaky again, the tears barely contained. The first one fell and Mal’s heart cracked, but he didn’t do anything yet. Asterin had to make the first move, had to choose to let them in. Then he sobbed and his head dropped.
“I was so alone,” Asterin sobbed, slumping so far forward his head fell into Mal’s lap. “I felt so alone. I was so scared, I thought I’d never see you again, I thought I was going to die there, in pain and alone and scared, I-I, I’m so scared, all the time, and I can’t make it go away.”
Mal let Asterin squeeze his hands tight enough he was losing feeling in his fingers. Tyril sat on the bed next to Asterin and started running his fingers through Asterin’s hair as Asterin’s shoulders shook with the weight of his sobs.
“You don’t need to make it go away,” Tyril said gently. “It’s alright to feel that fear, especially after what you went through. But you will never feel so alone again. We’re right here, we’ll always be right here.”
Asterin sat up just enough he could bury his face in Mal’s chest right over his heart. He let go of one of Mal’s hands and Mal immediately wrapped it around him. With his now free hand Asterin reached for Tyril who joined the embrace. Asterin clung to his hand too and Tyril scooted a little closer to Mal.
He couldn’t stop thinking about the way Asterin screamed his name in his nightmare. How many times had he screamed just like that? Mal remembered those cells where they’d found Kade, the very ones Asterin would have been locked in. When he wasn’t being tortured and experimented on that is. How many hours did he spend on that table so out of his mind with pain all he could do was scream for Mal to help him? How many nights did he spend in that cell just trying to reassure himself they were coming for him? How many nights did he plead and sob while Mal wasn’t there to hear him and comfort him like this?
He didn’t even realize his own tears had fallen until Tyril kissed his temple. He wiped the tears with his own shoulder. He could talk to Tyril about it later. Now was about Asterin. He knew if Asterin saw him upset he’d immediately drop his own feelings and try to focus on Mal which he would not allow.
“We’re right here,” Mal murmured. “We’ve got you, Rin. We’re not going anywhere. You’ll never be alone like that again.”
Mal murmured those reassurances over and over for what could have been hours, until his throat was dry. But he just kept going. He didn’t even think about stopping until Asterin slumped fully against him. His shirt was soaked from Asterin’s tears but Mal barely even noticed.
“Thank you,” Asterin muttered, still with his ear over Mal’s heart.
“Always kit,” Mal assured.
“I love you so much,” Asterin told them both. He even nudged Tyril and gave him a tired smile like he was trying to make sure Tyril was listening too. Tyril chuckled and kissed Asterin’s forehead. It was a common gesture for him but it always worked on Mal. Apparently it did the same to Asterin as his tired smile turned to something softer and he relaxed more against Mal.
“We love you too,” Tyril replied. “Until the stars fall out of the sky and all life is gone.”
“I love you too but poetry isn’t in my repertoire,” Mal said. It succeeded in making Asterin laugh, which was more important than anything else. “What do you say you try and get some actual sleep? We’ll both be right here. I can even get your stupid prince in here if you want. We’ve crammed him in the bed before, we can suck it up.”
“…you wouldn’t mind?” Asterin asked hesitantly.
“Tyril?” Mal prompted but Tyril was already getting off the bed. “Look at him go. So chivalrous.”
“Why do I bother with you?” Tyril sighed as he left the room, making Asterin giggle.
They heard a muffled conversation before Tyril returned with Aerin. Mal had to admit he looked truly concerned. Mal doubted Tyril really filled him in on what Asterin confessed but it was clear how much he hated seeing Asterin in pain. It was about the only thing they all had in common.
Asterin settled with his head on Mal’s chest, Aerin curled behind him and with an arm around his waist. Tyril was on the other side of Mal, holding Asterin’s hand on Mal’s chest. Asterin was asleep again within moments. The other three didn’t say a word, but there was no tension between them for once. Asterin was so relaxed with all three of them there that even with Aerin there it all felt so easy. Right. Whatever the feeling was, Asterin was happy. And that was all Mal needed.
Asterin's vs Tyril's vs Mal's Acts of Service love language just means they're constantly trying to sacrifice themselves for each other while Aerin tries to hold them back by the scruffs of the necks
