note: please mind the tags when you click on the links, some are rated E for explicit.
Matsukawa Issei/Hanamaki Takahiro (MatsuHana)
Can I Get A Waffle? by BooksandKpop
As with many things in his life, Hanamaki Takahiro’s soulmark was related to a meme. More specifically, a vine. Soulmates aside, he knew from the moment he discovered those words printed along the inside of his left arm that the man who had completed his reference without a moment’s hesitation was the perfect person for him.
Matsukawa Issei Contemplates Existence by perennials
"Are you gonna stop staring at my mouth, or do I have to tell you that it’s making me feel oddly self-conscious despite the fact that I’ve known you for three years and you do this kind of shit all the time?"
inevitable by birdwrites
“So let me get this straight. Our friend, who you’ve been in love with since high school, asked if you wanted to get married for tax reasons. And you said yes?”
“Well, when you put it that way I sound like a moron.”
Hirugami Sachirou/Hoshiumi Kourai (HiruHoshi)
Nothing Happened by shizous
Sachirou's upset and Kourai wants to know why
ripe fruit by snowborn
Navigating friendship in your teenage years is a breeze, according to Hoshiumi Kourai.
Yaku Morisuke/Nishinoya Yuu (YakuNoya)
eyes on the ball (eyes on me) by daedalust
One glance up at Yaku Morisuke, and Nishinoya is bewitched by a wildcat. Two liberos who find freedom in different paths.
Iwaizumi Hajime/Miya Atsumu (AtsuIwa)
ruined my life, by not being mine by akasuga
Miya Atsumu has a fat crush on athletic trainer Iwaizumi Hajime and he has to do something about that.
Hoshiumi Kourai/Hinata Shoyo (HoshiHina)
STAR TURN by alachat ★
"I just want a tattoo like yours," Shouyou says, stepping closer.
"Do you want to be me that much?" Hoshiumi jests, still catching light.
Kita Shinsuke/Miya Atsumu (AtsuKita)
fall apart, fall together by spiritscript
Staying friends with Kita, even after they break up, is easy, so easy. Until it's not.
Miya Atsumu/Hinata Shoyo (AtsuHina)
record scratch, freeze frame by batman ★
You're probably wondering how Atsumu ended up here.
Sawamura Daichi/Kuroo Tetsurou (KuroDai)
a distinctive species of fraudulent conduct (director's cut) by pepperfield ★
Two teams of criminals have converged on Date Castle for the same prize, but more than the Iron Crown might get stolen today.
Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi (DaiSuga)
And Crows Will Cry by MeikoAtsushi ✦
Daishou Suguru/Kuroo Tetsurou (KuroShou)
heat signature by onewhodiedyoung ★
Inside a photo album inside a shoebox inside a drawer inside the house he visits for holidays only, there is a picture of Suguru, before Tetsurou.
Hello are you still taking Spotify prompts ? If so could you please do something for atsuiwa and 69
hello hello !! yes i am sir !! ask & you shall receive :P
summary: atsumu is not the kind of person who knows how to let himself be loved. iwaizumi kisses him anyways. oh, and argentina is winning the semi-finals of the world cup.
prompt: spotify wrapped #69, adore you (harry styles)
pairings: atsumu miya/hajime iwaizumi
words: 1432
warnings: spoilers for the world cup semifinals lmfao
just let me kiss you once
Atsumu loves loudly. He loves with his whole heart on his sleeve, with his wanting clear and proud. He has never been one to hold back his feelings or his desires. But—that being said, he’s never been good with vulnerability. He wears his heart on his sleeve because he knows no other way to love, but he also does not know how to let himself be loved. He doesn't know how to open his already constantly bleeding heart to someone with a knife.
He loves loudly. But he also does not accept love easily.
He is someone who—and he knows this about himself, he knows this well—takes. He takes from other people and he drags from them what he wants to hold. He loves much the same way he plays volleyball: with more care than imaginable, but with high expectations for everyone who touches him.
He loves and he loves and he loves, but love, to Atsumu, is a push and pull rather than an exchange. This is not something that is particularly conducive to a relationship. This is not something that has allowed him to accept much love from anyone without being afraid that he will break it.
Perhaps this says something about his self-esteem; perhaps this says something about how afraid he is to be vulnerable, to be wanted, to be loved. Perhaps this says something about how he has never known how to let himself be wanted in any capacity other than his volleyball skills, maybe because he has never experienced such a thing and maybe because he was just not built to be loved.
That too probably says something about his self-esteem. Atsumu tries not to think about these things too much. It’s nerve wracking, like an earthquake shuddering through his body, whenever he thinks about what it would mean to let himself be in a relationship. To be vulnerable. To be honest with someone. It’s so much easier to throw himself into volleyball and forget about things like love.
(The problem only comes whenever he starts to like someone a little too much. It happens rarely, but when it does happen, Atsumu does everything he can to push it away. To forget about it. To regret it before it’s even happened. He knows that he’ll never quite be good enough for a relationship—kind enough, vulnerable enough, true enough—and so there’s no point in trying. He’s too scared of getting hurt.)
Atsumu cares with volume and fears with weight—all of which is to say that when Iwaizumi kisses him, Atsumu shoves him away with a terror that he doesn’t know how to explain. He likes Iwaizumi, he does, so why the fuck is he so afraid of the way that Iwaizumi looked at him just before leaning in?
They’re on Atsumu’s couch, sitting closer than friends would, a bowl of popcorn on the coffee table and two cans of beer next to it. A World Cup game is on in the background, the commentator saying something about how decorated Messi’s career has been. Atsumu can’t process it; everything beyond Iwaizumi is blurred and dulled.
“What the fuck?” Atsumu asks, gasping it more than saying it.
He’s grasping at straws, looking for a needle in a haystack, trying to unravel the kiss into something he can understand. He knows that he’s been obvious about liking Iwaizumi, he knows that, but he also knows that loving someone so boldly tends to scare people off more than it tends to bring people into him. He knows that the way he loves is too sharp for anyone else to ever want. He knows that he himself will never been good enough—
“Sorry,” Iwaizumi murmurs, turning away. He takes a shaky breath. “Fuck. Fuck, just—sorry. I thought—nevermind.”
“What the fuck?” Atsumu asks again, as if that will get him a better answer. He can still feel Iwaizumi’s kiss on his lips like a brand, and he can still feel a blush lingering on his cheeks. “Iwaizumi—”
“Sorry,” Iwaizumi snaps, shyness gone. All that’s left is a humiliation that burns hot, the weight of a mistake blooming in red over his cheeks. Atsumu has so many questions, has so much he doesn’t understand, and one of those things is the broken look working its way over Iwaizumi’s face, spreading past the blush on his cheeks into a set line of his mouth, until it becomes a careful blankness that betrays nothing. “Forget about it, Miya. I didn’t—it doesn’t have to mean anything.”
Atsumu stares at him. “What did you want it to mean?”
“I want it to be forgotten,” Iwaizumi says, voice hard. He keeps his eyes trained on the television. “Penalty kick and a yellow card, huh?”
“Iwaizumi.”
“Shitty call,” Iwaizumi continues, swallowing around a thick grief in his throat. Atsumu can hear it so clearly, that heartbreak that he’s trying to talk through without saying he’s feeling it. “Doesn’t feel like a yellow card.”
“Iwaizumi.”
Iwaizumi turns to face him, something torn up in his eyes. “I said forget about it, okay? I made a mistake. I thought you felt the same—just forget about it. Watch the game.”
Atsumu licks his lips, wondering if he could still taste Iwaizumi if he tried hard enough. He can’t, but he wants to. He wants to kiss Iwaizumi again. It’s just—
“You don’t want this,” Atsumu says, hard and decisive. “You don’t want to deal with—”
“Shut the fuck up.” Iwaizumi takes a breath. “You don’t get to decide what I want or what I feel. You only get to decide what you want, and if you don’t want to—do that—then I’m sorry I tried. Now watch the game. Messi just made the penalty. That’s—”
“Forget about the fucking game!” Atsumu turns his body to face Iwaizumi, taking a steadying breath that doesn’t feel steadying at all. “Iwaizumi, I can’t—I don’t know how to do these things.”
Iwaizumi glances at him, then looks back at the television. “Shit. Two-nil Argentina.”
“Can we focus?”
“No,” Iwaizumi says, hard and easy. “I’m not going to make you do something you don’t want. I’m sorry that I tried to. Can we please move on now?”
“Can we talk please about this?”
Iwaizumi sighs. “What is there to say?”
“That I liked it!” Atsumu snaps.
Iwaizumi freezes. Doesn’t take a breath. Keeps his eyes steady on the screen. “I kissed you and you said ‘What the fuck?’ Atsumu. You don’t say that if you like it.”
“I liked it,” Atsumu repeats, taking a deep breath. Iwaizumi exhales with him. “I want to kiss you again, Iwaizumi, I just—I don’t know what I’m doing and I’m not good at this kind of thing and I don’t know how to talk about feelings and I don’t know how to say that I—fuck. I don’t know how to say that I…”
“You don’t have to,” Iwaizumi says quietly. He’s looking at his hands rather than at Atsumu, cracking his knuckles one by one. “I’m not asking for you to confess your undying love or anything. And I don’t care whether or not you’re good at this—no one is good at this. We’re all just faking it until it works. So I don’t—I don’t care about that. I like you, and that’s all it is. So just…if you want—only if you really want—just let me kiss you.”
Atsumu swallows. He doesn't know how to be vulnerable. He knows how to wear his heart bare on his wrists for the world to see every pulse of but never touch. He doesn’t know how to let Iwaizumi love him. He doesn’t know how to love him back without overwhelming, without taking too much, without breaking him under his weight.
(He wants to try. Oh, he wants to try so badly. He wants to learn, if that’s what Iwaizumi wants from him.)
“Okay,” Atsumu whispers. “I can do that. Please—let me do that.”
Iwaizumi finally turns to look at him, biting his lip. Atsumu’s eyes go to his mouth, tracing the line of his teeth against his lip. His gaze flickers up to Iwaizumi’s eyes. He knows he’s been caught staring and he doesn’t care. If Iwaizumi wants him, then Atsumu will let him. He likes Iwaizumi too much to stop him. Maybe that’s selfish. Maybe that’s selfless. Maybe it’s just an act of care, and selfishness or selflessness doesn’t matter.
“Kiss me,” Atsumu murmurs, eyes going to Iwaizumi’s lips again.
Then: Atsumu lets him put the knife to his bleeding heart and trusts him not to drive it through the organ. Then: Iwaizumi kisses him.
↬ Pairing: one sided oiiwa/iwaoi + implied atsuiwa
↬ Timeline: timeskip | pre-olympic
↬ Genre: Angst ☔️
↬ Wordcount: 1,751
↬ AN: SPOILERS of Haikyuu since it’s timeskip. I listened to Heather, Lookalike by Conan Gray & Lose by Niki while writing this. Also a repost since when i wanted to edit it, this app decides to swoosh it away and all the writings were gone
↬ check out my other works here
“No, we didn’t date. Technically he wasn’t an ex-boyfriend. But he was an ex-something, an ex-maybe, an ex-almost.”
If people were to ask him how to describe himself, he would say; Oikawa Tooru is a man of dignity but with anxiety, he was confident but still has insecurities. He desperately needs his anchor; Iwaizumi Hajime and he had always believed that Iwa wouldn’t let him sink further.
For him, Iwa has always been there even before he had born and he certainly didn’t know a world where Iwa doesn’t exist, because he had assumed that Iwa being born earlier had always been waiting for him.
He was too dependent on his anchor, to think that Hajime and Tooru were eternal until it wasn’t. The text from the Seijoh’s VBC 3rd year popped up in his head, making his serve swerve off out of court. “Sorry!” He looked towards his teammates with a smile that covers his true self.
“I have a boyfriend.” Was what Iwa had said causing a ruckus in the group chat. Iwa texted it at exactly 3pm in Japan but for Oikawa it was 3am. And it had kept him awake ever since. Iwa had only told them since they’re all were planning to meet up for winter break and all Oikawa could think off was that Iwa’s boyfriend will be there.
His right knee just hurts a little more than usual today. The throbbing pain must have been evident since his teammates kept whispering. He felt sorry that he had worried them. The sound of the ball from his served was enough to cut his ringing thoughts. “Stay safe for winter break.” He cheered with his team but as soon as they leave, he plumped himself on the floor.
“Tooru, we’re going for a drink, want to join?” His team manager, Nicolas look at his face concern laced all over, his shadow towering his figure. Nicholas has been so kind to him. He knows about Oikawa’s injuries and he always reminded him not to push himself. Just like Iwa did. He bitterly recalled. “Sorry Nich, I’m going back to Japan tonight. We’ll get the drinks when I get back.” He pat Nicholas on his head and head towards the showers.
Oikawa slammed the door shut behind himself and walked across the room. His cheeks flamed, and his hands were fisted so tightly his fingernails cut into his palms. He twists the shower knob as he let the cold water washed away his frustration. “I’m fine.” He said trying to convince himself. Every time he closes his eyes; all he could think of Iwa in someone else’s comfort. He cursed himself for being too late.
The first day back at Miyagi was spent with him sleeping all day to the jet lagged. It wasn’t until that night when his mother told him that Iwaizumi had also come home for winter break. Oikawa was hesitant for the first time. If he were back in his high school days, he would straight up and ran towards his house without warning but now everything’s different.
He still decided to visit Iwaizumi’s household the next day to bring the souvenirs. Even if Iwa wasn’t home—which what he had hope honestly since he was afraid of being alone with Iwa would make him spill or worst loss his composure, he needed to visit Iwa’s mother. She did also take care of him alot and Oikawa regards her as his mother too.
He stood at their doorway, taking a deep breath before someone too familiar call out to him. His husky voice that was filled with shock. “Oikawa?” Oikawa turns to look at his ‘friend’ laced with someone else. “Ah, Iwa-chan…” he tried. He really did try to make it seem like everything was fine when he was on the verge of breaking down. His right knee starts to hurt again. And he had to muster up the strength and urge to complain towards Iwa.
“Ah, Haji-chan is this your Kusokawa?” The man chuckles a laughter when Iwa lightly scold him and hit his chest. “I’m Miya Atsumu, MSBY Black Jackals Setter, Iwa’s boyfriend.” Oikawa didn’t want to introduce himself. What should he say, “I’m Oikawa Tooru, Iwa’s childhood friend?” If he said that, it means that he had accepted the role that was given to him and he—he didn’t want that. He settled with just his name, “Oikawa Tooru.”
“Ah, this is as if two of my boys are coming back home, huh Tooru.” His mother smiled at him. Oikawa returned the smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. Iwaizumi would know. His eyes can’t help but glance at Atsumu to see his reaction, but he was busy containing his laughter over something that Iwa had whispered to him.
He already was considered as family in Iwaizumi’s household but the sight in front of him already told him, he had lost. It doesn’t matter if their family, thinks you’re a family. Not when the person doesn’t feel the same. If it was the stupid him, he would have rubbed this fact all over Atsumu’s face. But he knew better, Oikawa was just a family and Atsumu was a lover to Iwa.
It must have been accidental, and Oikawa didn’t mean to pry. Heck, he wished he hadn’t seen Iwa kissing another man. The guy Atsumu was like a mirror of him. At least there were some aspects that Oikawa could see but would not acknowledge their similarities. What’s the point when of being a lookalike when Iwa didn’t chooses him? Fortunately, he wasn’t the only one thinking that when Matsukawa and Hanamaki had forced him to go out drinking.
Hanamaki’s words kept circling in his head and he cursed for the comfort he found when it’s useless. “Isn’t that Miya Atsumu kind of like your lookalike Oikawa?” Makki was drunk with how he slurs his words and the glare that Mattsun gave him was enough to know that two of his friends were avoiding the topic of anything related to the said man.
All of them decided to visit Seijoh. At least to recall some memories was what Makki suggested. All five of them including Atsumu were walking together under the bright winter sky. They passed the playground that was a fond memory for Oikawa but when he looked towards Iwa, he didn’t share the same looked and continue ahead to visit their school.
The playground where they stop after their loss to Karasuno and his knees start throbbing more than usual. Iwa stopped him as they sat under the tree. Iwaizumi was on his knees, leaving a soft trail of kisses on his knees and eventually went up, kissing him when it looked like Oikawa was going to cry again whether for the loss or for the pain.
“Oikawa?” Mattsun stopped in his tracks when he noticed that Oikawa was touching his knees. “Oh? I’m fine Mattsun. Let’s go, those kids must be excited to see the Grand King Oikawa-senpai.” He hated himself for acting. And yet he hated that the only things he had of Iwa was his memories. The memories that was fond only to him and nothing to Iwa.
Winter break ended and they were back to their usual. Oikawa felt homesick after he came back. He felt homesick, whether there was a person in his arms or if he were in theirs. But how could he feel homesick when the person he calls home is no longer his? It never had been his to start with. He had to swallow the bitter tears. Nicholas came with drinks and it always ended the same way. With him in Oikawa’s arms.
Oikawa didn’t know what he tried to prove. Was it to himself? Or was it in hopes that Iwa knew and somehow would feel the same bitterness he felt whenever he thinks of him with Atsumu. “God, I’m so stupid.” He muttered under his breath. He knew he needed to accept the fact that Iwaizumi isn’t thinking about him at all. Not when Atsumu is there with him. As much as he hated to admit it, Iwa and him is nothing but he still couldn’t.
He felt physically sick, the feeling of trying to puke all his guts out were strong in his mind as he returned Nicholas’s kiss. He felt guilty. It was like a battle of himself, where one told him to stay loyal to the unrequited love of his and the devilishly one told him he shouldn’t ever need to feel alone when Iwa is in the comfort of someone’s else arms. Why should he feel the cold winter when Iwa was feeling the warm summer?
In a split second, their clothes were off, and all Oikawa could think about was Iwa. Did Iwa ever feel lonely while he was a world away? Did Iwa seek comfort from Atsumu? Why did their memories kissing inadvertently on the playground near their home, that cold winter night became a bitter memory now? “I can’t Nich…” He softly pushed Nicholas that was straddled on his lap.
Nicholas nodded understanding, his hand grabbed Oikawa’s cheeks “Who was he to you, Tooru?” Who was Iwa to him? Childhood friend would be the easiest response. But Iwa was more than that. More than an irreplaceable partner to him. “Lover?” Nicholas noticed the sudden tears that left his pretty eyes. “No, we didn’t date. Technically he wasn’t an ex-boyfriend. But he was an ex-something, an ex-maybe, an ex-almost.”
His tears kept falling and he disgusted himself. Not only did he think about Iwa when he was with another man but now, he’s crying over it for the first time too. His mind recalled his teacher saying that ‘almost’ was the saddest word— before he didn’t exactly understand the meaning but now everything makes sense. Iwaizumi Hajime was his almost.
“Shush…” He felt the lips that settles on his tear stains cheek, the sweet voice that’s a contrast to Iwa’s huskier ones telling him that Oikawa wasn’t alone and to cry his heart out. Nicholas kissed his tears away and all Oikawa could think was that he lied. He lied to everyone. He wasn’t fine. Broken cries, incoherent sobs, accompanied by the sick feeling in his stomach and it didn’t help that his knees hurt a lot. His knees hurt even more today, and Oikawa isn’t sure whether it was just his knee or whether it was his entire body crying for his heartbreak.
↬ oikawa is my comfort character but why do i love to make him sad??
↬ also was inspired between a talk about me and irl about how atsumu kinda have almost the same personality as oikawa and what if things?
↬ the names things are heavily inspired by gusari’s dj
↬ when hajime & tooru names are combines it forms 徹" meaning "obstinate" or "dauntless"
↬ tooru means ‘to pierce through’ & ‘to see through until the end’ and hajime means ‘beginning’ so when the end and the beginning comes together, they become eternal ( I recommend u to read gunjou no shashin for more context)
If you’re still taking prompts then trick or treat for atsuiwa please
Come into my ask box, ask trick or treat, and I’ll either treat you to some fluff, or trick you with some darkness!
Treat
If there was one thing he was certain of, it was that he hated the cold. California had spoiled him rotten. He’d relished in the heat, and the warmth, and the good weather year round. Yes, California got chilly, but never as chilly as Japan. And now that Hajime was back, he was cursing himself for ever thinking he could hack another Japanese winter.
He sneezed for the fourth time that hour, and held himself tighter. He was watching the team train, and just thinking about being shorts and t-shirts made him shiver. He hugged his jacket tighter around himself, and lamented the fact that he’d forgotten his scarf. It was only October, and he was freezing. He’d never survive longer than December at this rate.
Hajime checked his watch, and called an end to practice. He wanted to make sure everyone got home before dark. It was getting colder at night, and he wanted to make sure everyone stayed warm, and avoided catching colds.
Hajime used his spare key, and let himself into the apartment. He’d intended on finding his own place by now, but he’d been told there wasn’t any rush. And besides, he was quite comfortable. Maybe too comfortable. But that was a bridge he would cross later.
Dropping his things off in what was now considered his bedroom, Hajime made a bee-line for the couch. He grabbed the closest blanket - which just so happened to be the fluffiest - and cocooned himself on the couch. He was just settling in when he heard the apartment door open. He didn’t bother to call out a greeting. These things weren’t really necessary between them.
“There is no way you are actually that cold,” Astumu said. He was smirking a little. Hajime hated that smirk. He hated that he found it so endearing.
“I am freezing, you ass.” Hajime wrapped himself tighter in his blanket burrito and sulked.
“Aww, it’s not that bad,” Atsumu said, moving so that he was sitting on the couch with Hajime.
“If you’re sick of my whining, then cuddle me warm.” Hajime didn’t quite open the blanket burrito to let Atsumu in. No, instead, he pitched sideways, and made Atsumu catch him as he fell.
Hajime knew he was taking advantage of Atsumu’s good will, but he couldn’t really bring himself to care. They’d meshed together far better then he’d ever imagined. It had started as Hajime needing a place to live when he’d returned from college in California. But it was ending as a friendship. Possibly a friendship turned something more.
As with most things, Hajime decided he would cross that bridge when he got to it. For now, he had cuddles to indulge in, and body heat to steal from a kind, handsome man.
