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Audience Service probz: "I KNOW ITS NOT YOUR FAULT" THEN WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING AT ME?! "BUT IM NEVER COMING BACK TO THIS THEATRE AGAIN" Okay. Bye. "ACTUALLY, IM GOING TO STOP DONATING INSTEAD" Oh no, whatever are we gonna do without your £2 a month, guess we'll just have to take your £22+ for your tickets ://
I Knew You Would Do This
Customer: I'd like to exchange into the Mahler concert either the 6th or the 7th. I will accept an upgrade I will not accept a downgrade.
Me: Ok. *checks* I'm sorry, but I can't offer an upgrade. Your section is completely sold out. You can only downgrade into this concert.
Customer: Well, what about the first half?
Me: Yes. That's part of your section. It's sold out.
Customer: Ugh... I knew *you* would do this.
Me: I'm... sorry?
Customer: *proceeds to talk to herself* *hangs up*
How About Three?
Customer: I'm calling about tonight's availability.
Me: Ok. We only have single seats and no two seats are together.
Customer: What about three?
Me: .... We *only* have single seats and no two seats are together.
Customer: Ok.
The LA Phil is McDonald's
Customer: I'm looking for a concert on December 13 at 2:00 p.m.
Me: Well... we have a concert that day at 11:00 a.m.
Customer: So this isn’t your concert?
Me: No...
Customer: But...
Me: What website are you on?
Customer: www.lacma.com
Me: Ok... that's not our website.
Customer: What's your website?
Me: www.laphil.com
Customer: So... this isn't your concert?
Me: No. Which venue are you talking about?
Customer: December 13th.
Me: No. The venue.
Customer: December 13th.
Me: No... the venue!
Customer: What do you mean, "venue"?
Me: What building?
Customer: I don't know. This says... Los Angeles Master Chorale.
Me: Ok... We're the Los Angeles Philharmonic.
Customer: So what do I do?
Me: You need to call the Master Chorale.
Customer: So you can't tell me seats or prices.
Me: No.
Customer: Why not?
Me: That's not our company.
Customer: Then how do I find out?
Me: You need to call them.
Customer: Why can't I ask you?
Me: Because it's not our company. Look... there are many concert venues all around LA. They're all run by different companies. We only handle the Hollywood Bowl and the Walt Disney Concert Hall.
Customer: So you don't run the others?
Me: No. We only handle two. If you're asking about another venue and another company you need to call them.
Customer: Ok so... there are a lot of venues that are all run by other companies that are run by you.
Me: No. Uhm... Ok think of it this way. The LA Phil is McDonald's.
Customer: Ok.
Me: The Master Chorale is Burger King.
Customer: Ok...
Me: You cannot order a Big Mac from Burger King just as you cannot order a whopper from McDonald's.
Customer: Ok. So... you can't tell me prices and seats.
Me: No. You need to call them and ask.
Customer: Ok.
It Drives You Crazy!
Customer: You know I called all these numbers just to buy the tickets!
Me: Ok wel-
Customer: I've been on hold 15 minutes trying to buy these tickets and they make you call all these different numbers... You know press 1 or press 2 and it drives you crazy!
**I thought he had been calling different phone numbers... turns out he was just pissed he had to push 1 or 2 in our automated system before he was sent to me**
Me: Wel-
Customer: With how long it takes it doesn't even make you want them anymore! You know what?! KEEP YOUR FUCKING TICKETS! *click*
YES IT IIIIISSSSS!
Customer: You charged me for parking at the lot and it's always free.
Me: I'm sorry? What's always free?
Customer: The parking at Pasadena.
Me: Ma'am it's not-
Customer: YES IT IIIIISSSSSS!
Me: .....
Customer: How do I get my money back?
Me: You would need to call the county or whoever owns that parking lot.
Customer: No, it's always free. They just made a mistake.
Me: Ok... then you still need to call whoever owns that parking lot.
Customer: It's always free!
Me: Look. If whoever owns that parking lot decided to start charging people we don't have a say in it. It's not our parking lot. We don't own it. We don't charge people to park there. The owner or the county charges people.
Customer: Well it is because it's connected to you BECAUSE PEOPLE GO THERE TO PICK UP THE BUS THAT TAKES YOU TO THE HOLLYWOOD BOWL!!!
Me: Yes! HOWEVER! It is not our parking. We charge people for the buses and that's all. Just because our buses are there to take people to the Bowl does not mean we own it. Which we don't. If you want a refund you need to call the owner of that lot or the county itself and tell them you want your money back and see how well that goes over.
Customer: Ok!.... Byyyyye!
Me: Goodbye.
Forgot Password
Customer: Hi I forgot my password and I need a new one.
Me: Ok. Did you click, "forgot password"?
Customer: Oh... no. I just saw where it said to call the Box Office so I called. I suppose I should click that.
Me: Ok.
I Called This Number
Customer: I called and purchased tickets, but they sent me the wrong tickets.
Me: Ok. May I have your account number?
Customer: Where would I find that?
Me: Ok... may I have your last name?
Customer: *gives name*
Me: I'm not actually finding anything under your name. May I have your phone number?
Customer: *gives number*
Me: Ok... I'm not finding anything under your phone number. You say you got an email confirmation?
Customer: Yes.
Me: Are you sure you purchased through us? Because if we do phone order we don't send email confirmations.
Customer: Yes! I called this number and purchased tickets!
Me: Can you tell me what your confirmation says?
Customer: On the tickets?
Me: No... your email confirmation.
Customer: Ok It says from eventtickets.com-
Me: Ok! You actually didn't purchase through us. You purchased through a third party vendor and as such there is nothing we can do since you didn't purchase directly through us.
Customer: Ok so... what do I do?
Me: You need to call them.
