#autism ask

[storkmuffin]

Another personal ask (feel free to ignore if you don't want to talk about it!!!) you mentioned somewhere earlier that you're on the spectrum. Is that something that's acknowledged/accepted/respected in your daily life? Is it something you need to work around? How does it intersect with your experience as a Korean woman?

My diagnosis is a self-diagnosis, but I will say I came by it with rigor. I've taken all the available tests online for autism diagnosis in English and Korean, and I've read most of the in-print books about women's autism (in English or English translation from the Swedish etc). I would also never be believed as 'autistic' because I either don't have or have masked from necessity all behaviors that are 'too autistic.' Getting a real diagnosis would not help me have an easier time in life. I've shared my conclusion with my mother, because I think both my parents are spectrum too (I got it from somewhere, right?) and she mostly does agree with me.

I think there's a lot of controversy about calling neurodivergent women like me who were academically successful in school, got and keep "good" jobs, can drive and travel etc, autistic. But knowing I am autistic helped me explain all the social disasters of my life that otherwise felt incomprehensible. It helped me enact 'codes of normal behavior' that have made my life easier. Previously, I didn't do these things even though I knew about them, because I thought they were all so stupid and unnecessary, but now I know that the majority neurotypicals will choose to reward the person they like more than the person who is better at the actual thing, and punish a person who achieved an excellent result if they don't behave socially correctly. It's just how the neurotypicals are, and they outnumber me and mine.

As for how this intersects with being a Korean woman -

Partially in order to protect them from harm, there's a mysterious silence around who exactly came up with, for example, Korean feminist separatist concepts like 4B, but since my own self realization I've wondered if the core of whatever group that was wasn't autism spectrum. To look at the state of Korean gender relations and conclude, OK, no, not doing any of that, rather than, I will win at this game of finding the magic unicorn husband, is kind of an autistic reaction, to me. The person who came up with it would have to have relatively low social engagement needs, and have experienced navigating romance and sexual relationships as an imposition rather than a source of fun and validation, plus found the 'enactment' of the farce of femininity in the dating game unbearable and not worthwhile.

[docgold13]

I saw something in the comments to that Toyman picture you made. Do you think the DC animated universe version of Toyman is meant to be representational of neurodivergence/autism?

no. Not even a little.

I mean, neuro-atypical is a super braod umbrella that can encompass a great many things, but I did not see anything in thge DCAU version of Toyman that made me think of the autistic spectrum.

The DCAU Toyman is just a creep who was arrested in his development at an early age and has used his brilliance as an inventor to try to recapture and concretize the childhood he felt was stolen from him.

Individuals on the autistic spectrum can also suffer from arrested development but not in a fashion that is significantly different compared to clinical norms. In other words, these sorts of dynamics occur in neuro-atypical and nero-typical populations with the exact same frequency.

[salti-thelatediagnosedautist]

How do I know if I'm autistic?? Like I can relate to almost everything that ppl talk about in autism, I googled symptoms and stuff and I check off most of the list but idk it kinda sounds like it's just me thing, doesn't have to be autism. Maybe I am just like that, or uk it's just my anxiety issues getting in the way or smthm

/disclaimer: of course not everything I say will relate to every autistic person as we are all different. If you feel as though you are experiencing symptoms that are damaging your daily life then you should see a doctor if possible.

Well, autism is something that usually affects every aspect of your life. Your personality, your childhood upbringing, your mental health, your social life, your eating habits, your interests, how you go at work, etc.

I feel like knowing if you are autistic or not is just a decision you come to when you are ready (while doing research). You'll need to have patience with yourself (which is annoying, I know).

There is no set blood test, no brain scan, etc, that alone can diagnose you with autism. Even doctors are just doing quizzes and tests based on your answers. So, even medically there's not really any 100% fool-proof way to know. It's just something that you have to decide on your own. Do you relate to enough traits? Do you feel as though the label works for you?

BUT - The thing is, you don't need to be certain to start improving your life.

The end-goal of a diagnosis is finding ways to support you, based on that diagnosis. If things that help autistic people help you, then that's great! You don't need to be sure that you are autistic to try tips meant for autistic people and improve your life.

Before I got professionally diagnosed (a few months ago), and before I was certain in my self diagnosis, I was still using techniques meant for autistic people to help myself. And part of the reason I became more confident in my self diagnosis was because these tips/techniques helped me so much.

The kind of tips I'm talking about are things like:

experimenting with stimming and seeing how it makes you feel.

trying to reduce noise and other sensory input and seeing how it makes you feel.

trying to un-mask in safe spaces and seeing how I feel.

letting myself be picky with food and textures and seeing how I feel.

So, basically, your self diagnosis is just something you need to give yourself more time to be confident in. It can take a long time for autistic people to come to a big decision like that. We are generally cautious and thoughtful, and want to be accurate, so it takes time.

But in the mean time, experiment with techniques as if you were autistic and see how you feel. There's nothing to lose!

I also feel like the more you pressure yourself to be confident in your self diagnosis, the more doubts will begin to arise.

It can also help to keep a google doc, or a journal, of autistic traits you experience, and how often. Or keep links/screenshots to posts by autistic people you relate to. Seeing the evidence add up in a visual space can really help you to feel more confident in your self diagnosis.

And I think that's all I've got to say! I hope this helps :) Thank you for being my first ask :0

[abucketofweird]

I’m currently not okay.

I’m pretty sure I’ve fallen deep into autistic burnout and it has majorly impacted my life.

Over the summer it was easier to ignore because I didn’t have things to do or much to stress about. But now it’s November first and every single assignment, class, and school related thing has destroyed any sense of achievement.

I cant take care of my own body anymore. I sleep for days without getting up to drink water, eat, or go to the bathroom. I put all of my energy into my classes recently and I’ve missed every single weekend because I’ve slept through it. Let alone doing things that require brain power or create massive anxiety for me. Like showering or even brushing my teeth.

My school performance is finally suffering after months of feeling myself drop. My memory is completely shot and I can’t write anything academic to save my life.

I look at an assignment and write it down in my planner and then I have to take a break. I write on half of a sentence and I have to take a break. It took me thirty minutes to write an email that was three sentences today.

I’ve never felt this horrible before. It’s not depression or anxiety. It’s just emotional and physical exhaustion from living as an autistic person. I have my loop earbuds in constantly (even in my safe spaces) and I’ve been able to wear two things out of my closet without having a sensory meltdown.

The only thing I’ve been able to find that people say helps autistic burnout is rest and removing responsibilities and stress from your life. I can’t do that. I am not in the financial situation to take any time off of school without going into a full salary job. I cant even take time off of classes now because I’m in the middle of third quarter and I’ve been slammed with work.

If anyone has any advice or suggestions for therapy I can try or literally anything I would really appreciate it. I’ve always been the high achieving student and now I’m desperately hanging onto my gpa for my scholarship.

[sasarahsunshine]

Do you have any tips for writing autistic reid and meltdowns? (Sorry if this question is weird or overstepping, feel free to ignore it) Also I hope you're having a good day!

Hello, hello, hello!!

This is not a weird question at all! I think it's a really good question! And honestly, when I want to write autistic characters in general, I write them how I myself react to situations. For example, when I'm overwhelmed, I get headaches and semi-verbal (not completely non-verbal, unless it's really bad). I am slowly learning how to stop masking too since I was forced to mask my entire life and only recently (as in the past year) got my ASD diagnosis. I'm 27 years old and only now learning that it's okay to stim and be myself.

Meltdowns can be difficult to write IMO because sometimes it's hard to really put into words how they feel in general. Like, how do you explain what it feels like when your body suddenly stops working? When you can't control your facial expressions or "feel" your legs anymore? It's kind of like... when your emotions and senses are so overwhelming/overstimulated, you just want to scream or cry or shake the feeling away (this can happen when you're happy too, not just angry/upset. Personally, I shake my arms out while flapping my hands when I'm excited because it feels like there's SO MUCH happiness in me that I have to shake it out!).

My favorite ASD Spencer Reid authors are @spencer-reids-adventures and @glowingspence ! They both have AMAZINGLY detailed works that explore Spencer's autism in a way that is not only super respectful, but also easy to understand and see (like, I see myself in them a lot, if that makes sense), and Maya is really good at saying: "I'm autistic, and that's not a bad thing." (which makes me smile <3)

And of course, you can always google typical ASD traits or look for examples of stimming, meltdowns, overstimulation reactions, etc.

I hope this helps! <3

[apinchofsanity]

8, 12, 13, and 27 for the autism asks

8) If you have any, what are your special interests?

Ooo I have a few!!! Okay so forensic science is a big one, Marvel, DC, animals, power rangers, Starkid and many more I can't think of right now :)

12) Do you headcanon any characters as autistic? If you want, tell us why you headcanon them as autistic.

I headcanon a lot of characters as autistic, but the ones I can list off the top of my head are Peter Parker, Lilo from Lilo and Stitch, Luna Lovegood, Elle Woods from Legally Blonde, Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake, Mabel and Dipper from Gravity Falls, Eleven and Will from Stranger things. Mostly I headcanon because of particular behaviours I identify and recognise as neurodivergent in these characters.

13) Tell us an autistic person that you really look up to.

That would without a doubt have to be @defectivegembrain :D she is literally my best friend and one of the best individual's I know. I'm super honoured to have her as a friend and her friendship makes me a better person. She is brave and kind hearted and the autism community is genuinely a better place with her in it :D

27) Do you have any vocal stims or echolalia?

I think I gravitate more towards echolalia than vocal stims, if I say a word and it feels nice I'll repeat it out loud and internally on a loop. It's the same with lyrics of a song, I'll sing a particular verse to myself over and over (more often than not its Starkid songs).

THANK YOUUU FOR ASKING <3

[jackie-gremlin-ghost]

For the autism ask: 1,2,6,7, and 24. (If some of the questions I asked are too personal them I'm sorry. Hope ya have a great day!)

1. I was 2 years old when I was diagnosed, so I’ve known pretty much my whole life.

2. As far as I know, I’m the only autistic member of my family.

6. I have never been in a relationship yet.

7. I don’t find it too hard making friends in all honesty.

24. I used to have meltdowns when I was younger. Not as much now.

[distractedmuffins]

8, 9 and 35 for autism asks

8. If you have any, what are your special interests?

- My current special interests are animation (like making them), autism, adhd, Evermerge, Stardew Valley, and probably more but that's all I can think of at the moment

9. What was your first special interest?

- hmm, well I used to love organizing this container of rainbow hair beads when I was little, I'd make a whole game out of it, then restart, but I'm not sure if that'd be a special interest? And I was also really into jigsaw puzzles

35. Have you ever used a weighted blanket?

- I have! I tried one out a few years ago. It was nice, but I get too hot at night to really keep it on, I'd probably do better with a weighted lap pad or something.

Thanks for the ask!