#avoid conflict

[defensive-tactics]

Removing yourself from dangerous situations is the best self defense tactic. You win every fight that you avoid.

[dk-thrive]

I, on the other hand, am a match. I burst into flames, but my fire goes out as quickly as it ignites.

"A person’s strengths are often also weaknesses. I admired Paul’s resistance to outside pressure, but he could be, to my mind, obtuse. Contained, deliberate, and slow to anger, he avoided conflict and detested it when I raised my voice. I, on the other hand, am a match. I burst into flames, but my fire goes out as quickly as it ignites. I beg for forgiveness and make up as soon as possible."

— Siri Hustvedt, Ghost Stories: A Memoir (Simon & Schuster, May 5, 2026)

[robinwoodsfiction]

Writing Manipulative Characters

Let’s face it, writing manipulative characters is so much fun. Unfortunately, people do this in real life too. This post will help you build your deceitful character (and also help you identify when you are being manipulated in real life). Manipulation is a form of aggression. We all understand it when it’s overt, but covert manipulation is harder to detect. And, when the person doing the…

Writing Manipulative Characters

[ae-cha08]

A lot of times we think winning a fight is a mark of honor. We walk away from an argument thinking, I won that fight. I told them off. That’s not winning. You fed your ego, but it didn’t strengthen your relationship. You may have won the argument, but how much damage was done?

When we say hurtful things, it exacts a heavy price. The real way to win is to avoid it and walk away. That’s a mark of honor. It takes humility. Pride wants to argue and have the last word.

[startledstars]

how does God expect you to show unconditional love or kindness to people who are like, racist and homophobic or otherwise bigoted?

Hi anon,

Thanks for the question!

Certain types of people should be avoided. Here’s what God’s books teach:

“Don’t follow the bad example of cruel and evil people. Turn aside and keep going. Stay away from them.”

“Stay away from foolish people; they have nothing to teach you. Why is a clever person wise? Because he knows what to do. Why is a stupid person foolish? Because he only thinks he knows.

Trying to change or engage with ‘foolish’ people will do more harm than good. The best way to love them is to leave them alone, and let them deal with the consequences of their actions.

Another proverb to consider:

“God hates the ways of evil people, but loves those who do what is right. If you do what is wrong, you will be severely punished; you will die if you do not let yourself be corrected.”

This is not God threatening to kill people; it’s a warning. Death, both physical and spiritual, is the ultimate destination for people who keep doing wrong.

Nonetheless, God commands kindness.

“If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and God will reward you.”

Your enemies think you’re evil. Your enemies want you to fight. If you’re kind to them instead, they’ll be taken off guard, and forced to examine their own actions.

Ultimately, kindness is the best revenge; it’s harder to hate someone who is gentle, loving, and generous. Bigots are looking for a reason to justify hate. You ‘win’ by not giving them one.

I hope this helps you love your enemies, and please remember that it is wise to avoid fools!

[neaarty]

[wizarddyke]

Google: Am I being petty or do I genuinely have the right to be this uncomfortable with this

[defensive-tactics]

Avoid Conflict. And be prepared to defend yourself, just in case. (thanks to @wheelman40)