#background saileen

[dean-winchesters-adhd]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

A new Autistic!Dean Destiel fic? That's COMPLETED? Say what?!

This is a one shot that takes place in my "Celebration Day" AU. The gang is investigating a murder involving a cult who uses magical means to punish it's members if their secrets slip out.

Check it out & comment if you can, I love hearing the feedback!

[clairenatural]

destiel, 2k. mafia!Cas/Kingergarten teacher!Dean from an anon prompt for mafia!dean or Cas protecting the other at all costs. I’m not entirely sure what this turned into but it was fun to write so I hope it’s also fun to read :) it references stuff that happens in 12x10, Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets.

“Sir, we have a problem.”

Castiel sighs. His five least favorite words. He glances up, frowning at Inias. “What kind of problem?” He doesn’t add that it had better be important to justify the younger man barging into his office like this, but it’s implied.

Inias takes a deep breath before stepping fully into the room, letting Castiel’s glass office door shut behind him. “The DA’s office is refusing to back down on the Ishim case.”

“And you paid them the standard amount?”

“Yes, sir. But one of the DDAs refused it.”

“Refused it.”

“He’s new. He doesn’t understand our arrangement.”

“Hm.” Castiel closes his laptop and leans back in his chair, considering both the situation and the man in front of him. They hadn’t had a problem with the DA in years—at least, not since Castiel had taken over. Their messes were less messy and they paid more generously for silence. “How much does he need to understand?”

“That’s the problem, sir. I don’t think he will.”

Castiel scoffs. “Anyone in power can be bought off,” he replies, because in all his years he’d never met someone who couldn’t be. Power corrupts, after all.

Inias shifts uneasily, and Castiel can tell he isn’t going to like how this ends.

“We’ve received word that he’s begun investigating independently.”

Castiel groans at this, closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose.

“But don’t worry!” Inias continues quickly, hurridly. “We can put our best men on the assignment, have him taken care of by tonight—”

“Wait,” Castiel cuts him off with a sigh. He forces his eyes back open. “I’m not mad,” he says before anything else, because Inias looks like a deer in the headlights and even after all this time his employees still need occasional reminding that he is not his brothers.

When he’d taken over for Michael he’d promised himself—he’d promised everyone—less bloodshed. He swore to defend his family, business, and territory from Crowley and his cronies, but he’d been determined to stop ending innocent lives. For some reason, though, innocents just love getting in the way. He sighs again. “What’s his name?”

“Sam Winchester.”

And, well. That certainly complicates things. He’d known when Sam announced he was going into criminal law that this was a possibility—in some ways, he thinks he should have expected this.

“Sir?” Inias asks, and Castiel realizes he doesn’t know how long he’s been staring at him. “Are you…do you know him?”

Castiel blinks back to reality and glares at him. “Call them off,” he orders, and cuts Inias off when he tries to protest. “Call them all off, Inias. Now.”

“But, sir, what about—”

“I’ll deal with Sam Winchester myself. Nobody else is to touch him.” Then, just for emphasis, “Until I say otherwise, consider him under my protection.”

Inias is still staring at him, baffled, but after a moment he nods, and Castiel is thankful that he’s decided not to argue. “Alright, I—yes. Understood.” He nods again before leaving the office and Castiel sinks deep into his chair, pressing the heels of his hands into both eyes.

His phone buzzes and Castiel watches as a text message lights up the screen, revealing the photo from his wedding he has set as his background. It’s a message from Dean, because of course it is, asking him what he wants for dinner and if he wants wine with it.

Castiel looks around his office, awarded to him based on his surname but paid for in blood, and he’s never hated it more.  

————————————————————-

They get half an hour into the low-budget western Dean had insisted in watching before his husband sighs, pauses the movie, and sets his wine glass down on the coffee table.  “What’s going on with you?”

Castiel frowns up at him from where he’s lying on the couch, cheek against Dean’s thigh, his own wine glass barely touched. All things considered, Castiel thinks he’s been doing a great job acting like everything is fine. He forgets, sometimes, how easily Dean can read him.

“Work was…long,” he answers, and it isn’t a lie. Then, because Dean is looking at him like he doesn’t believe him, he follows up with “How’s Sam?”

It’s both a deflection and an answer to Dean’s question, but Dean doesn’t know that. Dean thinks he manages a hedge fund. Which he does. Technically. Legally, at least.

Dean knows he’s changing the subject but he doesn’t press it, and his face lights up the way it always does when someone asks about his brother. Castiel loves him for it. Dean starts on about Sam, how he’s doing with Eileen, how they just moved into a bigger house because they want to start a family. Castiel isn’t paying attention, not really, because Dean’s fingers are playing with his hair and he doesn’t really want to think about anything else.

“—I said I’d help him out, though.”

That catches his attention. “What? Why?” he asks, a bit too quickly, because even though he’s missed most of the context he can’t help the sinking feeling in his stomach.

Dean raises an eyebrow. “Come on, babe. I never get to use my degree anymore.” He shrugs. “And it sounds fun, you know? Helping my baby brother take down a corrupt criminal justice system. I feel like Serpico.”

“No.” It comes out more forcefully than he had intended and he sits up, turning fully to face Dean. “No, Dean, you need to stay out of it.”

Dean blinks at his husband, and Castiel immediately backtracks. “I mean, um. You don’t—you don’t have any evidence.”

“That’s the point of me helping,” Dean rolls his eyes. “I know I chose teaching five-year-olds over working in cybersecurity, but I still know my way around.”

“You’re going to hack into the DA’s office?”

“It sounds bad when you put it like that.”

“It is bad.” Castiel knows he’s being too insistent, is pushing too hard, but Dean can’t get involved, too. He can’t. “It’s dangerous. You don’t know who else could be involved.”

“I don’t care about that.”

“You should. You just don’t understand—”

“Understand what, Cas?” Dean snaps, and now it’s the fight Castiel didn’t want to have. “What could I possibly not understand that you do? A kid is dead and the DA is trying to cover it up and just maybe I can help figure out why.”

“There are things you don’t—” Castiel is already halfway through his next argument when the second half of Dean’s sentence catches up with him, and he stops. “Did you say a kid?”

Dean scoffs. “You weren’t even listening, right? Great. Yeah, some asshole killed his ex-girlfriend’s new boyfriend and her kid and the DA is refusing to press charges. Says there isn’t enough evidence. Sam thinks they were paid off.”

“No,” he says, quietly, because no. The daughter was never supposed to—that’s not what happened. He had been told that’s not what happened.

“What do you mean, no?” There’s less heat in Dean’s words, and Castiel thinks it’s because he himself has completely deflated.

He stares at his husband—the love of his life, the beautiful, generous, selfless man he doesn’t deserve—and realizes he’s never going to be able to talk Dean down from this. If he could, he wouldn’t be Dean.

He thinks about all he’s done to keep this part of his life safely tucked away. He cultivated a reclusive public image to keep Dean safe from being the husband of Castiel Novak, manager of the Novak Group. He expanded their territory to encompass the school Dean works at, something his family still holds against him as a waste of resources, to protect him from being the husband of Castiel Novak, leader of the crime syndacate. He’s hidden his marriage from nearly the entire family, labeling anything to do with Dean as the most privileged of information.

The only reason he’s still doing this at all, really, is Dean. He could have jumped ship when Michael died, when Gabriel left, when Lucifer took the fall and was sentenced to life, but that meant giving everything to Raphael, who promised to hunt both him and Dean down if he left. So he took the reins instead and he’s tried his best to keep his family safe while managing the business—both the above and underground aspects.

And now, despite all that, both Dean and his brother have somehow gotten themselves involved.

Dean is still staring at him, brows furrowed, and he doesn’t move away when Castiel reaches out to take both of his hands into his own. “I’m sorry,” he starts, and Dean looks taken aback but he doesn’t break the eye contact. “I love you. I don’t want you to end up in trouble.”

Something in Dean’s eyes softens. “Hey,” He squeezes Castiel’s hands lightly. “Come on. Have a little faith in me.”

And all Castiel can do, just like any time Dean looks at him like that, is smile back. And nod. And lean forward to kiss him, just once, softly.

“I do, Dean. I always do.”

Dean leans their foreheads together and Castiel can tell he’s still concerned, but he doesn’t want there to be any more yelling tonight, so instead he pulls back to lie down in Dean’s lap again. He hears Dean sigh before picking up the remote with the hand not still intertwined with Castiel’s, and then he restarts the movie, and Castiel tries not to think for the rest of the night.

 ————————————————————-

The next morning, though, he’s storming into his office, ready to lay into anyone involved with lying to him. He doesn’t get far—Naomi is sitting in his chair. At his desk. For a brief moment, he sees red.

“That’s my chair.”

His aunt regards him, cool as ever. “Is it?” she asks, and she stands, but only to walk around the desk and into his space. “And who gave it to you?” In her heels she’s taller than him but he glares anyway, refusing to be intimidated. He doesn’t respond.

“Why are you protecting Sam Winchester?” she asks after a moment of silence, still standing just as close.

“Why did you lie to me about the incident with Ishim?”

Naomi’s expression doesn’t change, but something close to surprise flickers across her eyes and she backs off to lean against his desk. “I suspect the answer to both of those questions is the same.”

“May Sunder was never supposed to die,” he presses, not backing down, and Naomi looks at him as if he’s being an unruly child.

“Yes, but her mother threatened to go to the police. Come now, Castiel, you’re old enough to understand these things.”

“I never authorized that.”

Naomi stands again. “You think you have to?”

This, of all things, catches him off-guard. “I—yes?”

His aunt steps forward, crowding him again, and he hates himself for taking a step back. “You’re a figurehead, Castiel. You’re in power because you’re Michael’s brother, people like you, and we thought you’d at least be loyal.”

“I am loyal,” he retorts, and she sighs.

“I’m not the only one who’s begun to question your sympathies, Castiel. Who are you loyal to?”

“My family.”

“Does that mean us? Or Dean Winchester?”

Castiel freezes, stunned. “How—”

Naomi cuts him off with a smile. “You think we don’t know? We’ve been letting you play house because it kept you distracted. Now, it seems, it’s making you weak. If you don’t fix this, I’ll have no choice but to cure you of that weakness.”

At last she steps away and turns towards the door. “You have an army here, Castiel. Don’t lose it for one man.”

And then she leaves.

And then, Castiel makes a decision.

In the next few hours, he makes several more—and then he’s driving home with all his family’s secrets copied onto a hard drive, the few items from his office that he actually cares about, and a plan forming on how to take the whole system down.

It’s almost funny, he thinks, the decision Naomi expected him to make—that she’d expected him to choose the family over Dean. That she’d expected him to choose anything over Dean.

She has no idea what’s coming. 

[petrichoravellichor]

Written for Day 24 of the Supernatural Deserved Better Creative Challenge (prompt: Dean).

********************

When Sam and Eileen first tell Dean they want to name their unborn son after him, Dean's reaction is one of shock. He plays it off with a joke, though.

"Jeez, Sammy, way to curse the kid right off the bat," he says, which earns him a bitchface from Sam, a look of reproval from Cas, and Jack furrowing his brow and asking Eileen what bats have to do with childbirth.

"It's what they're gonna use to knock me out when I go into labor," she deadpans, and they all laugh.

*********

Dean spends the next several months trying to convince Sam and Eileen to go with a different name.

"What about 'Bobby'?" he offers one day during dinner. "Or 'Charlie'. That could work for a boy."

Sam rolls his eyes. "Dean--"

"Or 'Sam'! Come on, Sammy, don't tell me you don't like the idea of having a Sam Jr."

"Sorry, Dean," says Eileen, smirking in a way that suggests she is not, in fact, sorry, "but Garth beat us to it."

And Dean scowls and looks down at his plate, because there goes any argument he was about to make in favor of 'Castiel', too. "I'm just sayin'," he says after a moment, "there's gotta be another name you like better."

He feels a pair of arms wrap around his shoulders and looks up to see Cas leaning over his chair, expression soft. "Personally," says Cas, "I think 'Dean' is a lovely name." He quirks a smile and adds, "You might even say it's one of my favorites."

Dean feels his face flush in a way he's still learning to deal with. "Yeah, well," he grumbles, "that's 'cause you're a sap."

The kiss Cas presses to his temple by way of response makes him feel a little better, though.

**********

"You're too hard on yourself," Cas says gently that night, the words warm against the back of Dean's neck as Cas holds him close under the covers. "You're a better man than you give yourself credit for."

Dean shifts self-consciously. "'m fine with myself," he mumbles. "Just don't see why anyone would wanna name a kid after me. I've done a lot of bad things, Cas."

"And you've also done a lot of good things," comes Cas's patient reply. "I told you once that everything you've done, the good and the bad, has been for love, and I meant it. Everyone who knows you sees that it's true, Sam and Eileen especially. What better legacy to pass on to their child than one of love?"

Dean lets out a shaky breath. "I don't deserve you; you know that, right?"

But Cas just grips him tighter, right hand wrapping around to squeeze Dean's shoulder. "Of course you do."

**********

A few months later, they're all at the hospital, and Dean gets to hold his nephew for the first time.

"Careful," says Sam, with all the anxiousness of a first-time father, "make sure you support his head."

"I know how to hold a baby, Sam."

"Right. Sorry."

"He's so small!" whispers Jack, practically bouncing on his heels at Dean's side. He looks up at Eileen and signs, "I thought he'd be bigger."

From the bed, Eileen gives a tired laugh. "Hey, I'm not complaining."

"He's beautiful," says Cas, smiling down at Dean Jr. "Congratulations to you both." He rests his chin on Dean's shoulder, adding, in a quieter voice, "You see? He's perfect."

And Dean looks at his nephew, so small and vulnerable and new to everything, and the sense of absolute, unconditional love he feels is so great that he has to blink back tears. "Yeah," he manages. "Yeah, he is."

[gnbrules]

“But it’s your honeymoon,” argued Sam.

Team Free Will 3.0 (Dean had upgraded them once Eileen became a pretty obvious permanent member) was gathered in the bunker kitchen. Dean and Cas had called them there to make an announcement over breakfast. Sam, Eileen, and Jack had assumed the newlyweds were finally about to reveal their honeymoon plans – where they were going, when, and for how long.

What they didn’t expect was to be invited along.

But Cas and Dean were looking at them as if it was the most natural thing in the world. “We know it’s our honeymoon,” said Dean. “And we’re still going to do things that are just us. But –”

“But we’ve never had a vacation together,” Cas added, almost as if they had rehearsed it. “You know, as a family. And that’s what we want.” Cas looked from Sam to Eileen, eyes finally settling on Jack, who smiled awkwardly back at him.

“But that’s kind of weird, right?” said Sam, trying one more time.

Dean rolled his eyes. “So? Who cares? Last week I married a former Angel of the Lord, in front of some werewolves, the Queen of Hell, and some dead people. We’re gonna worry about weird now?”

Eileen grinned at Sam. “He has a point,” she said. “If they really don’t mind, we could use a getaway, too. It’d be fun.”

Well, if there was one thing that would convince Sam, it was Eileen getting onboard.

Jack, who had never known about traditions, had no qualms about joining them, either. “So, where are we going to go?” he grinned.

Dean pulled out a pamphlet from his back pocket and handed it to Jack. The three of them all leaned in for a closer look. The pamphlet featured a large ranch-resort in Northern California and listed lots of onsite activities and interesting locations nearby. It had a pool, horse-back riding, a spa, and it was only a few miles from the beach and a ton of fun-looking restaurants. Sam would have bet a hundred bucks that Dean had already signed him and Cas up for the horseback riding, and that he was already packing up some cowboy hats. 

What a dork.

“You’re sure?” asked Sam.

Dean looked at Cas, then back at his brother. “Yeah,” he smiled. “Cas and I can do our own thing, then meet up with you guys at the beach or for dinner on certain days. It’ll be great.”

Everyone looked at Sam, waiting for his decision.

Dean was right, of course. Nothing about the Winchesters had ever been normal or traditional. And this was apparently what Dean and Cas wanted. How could he argue with that?

“Well,” said Sam with a grin, “Guess we’re all going on vacation.”

Dean and Cas couldn’t have been more thrilled.

[karateficrec]

February/March 2019 Minor Moose Warning Fic Recs

Spells, Potions, and a Wizard Boyfriend by whispered_story (J2 AU)

One More Word by @karategirl80 (blatant self promotion, sastiel)

Finding Our Way by @pherryt (Dean/Cas/Benny/Alfie, wip)

The Process by @soupernabturel (destiel)

Adventures in Problem Solving by @blueeyesandpie (destiel, PBExchangeWinter)

Angel Put Aside For Me by @treefrogie84 (sam/jess, destiel)

Bluebells by @envydeanwrites (destiel)

America’s Most Wanted by @alyndra9 (sam/amelia)

First and Only by @almaasi (destiel, background saileen)

[brittywritesstuff]

Could you possibly write a destiel New Years fic?

Y’now, I think I can!

Dean has never been much for celebrating New Year’s. Every year, with the change of the clock came the promise of a new threat, more pain, and more of the same unending suffering. This year, though… this year is different. Sure, there’s always a threat on the horizon. As a hunter, there will always be pain and loss and suffering. But this year in particular, he has something new to look forward to. Because this year, Dean’s not alone.

In the week between Christmas and New Year, Dean racks his brain to devise the perfect plan. It’s his first with Cas, and it needs to be good. No, not just good. Perfect. Sam teases him, of course, but when he points out it’s Sam’s first with Eileen, he shuts up pretty quick.

Dean and Sam debate a quiet night at home, just Sam, Eileen, Cas, and himself. But then he thinks… why not go all out? Why not go big? He gets to ring in a New Year with the love of his life — the angel who defied Heaven for him — and a quiet night in the bunker just won’t do it.

He has to find something better.

On his various grocery, coffee, and beer runs, Dean perished the cork boards with local flyers for any ideas or possible leads. What the fuck could make New Year’s spectacular in the middle of Kansas. Every time, he came up empty. Until December 30th, when he came across an ad for a massive party over in Kansas City. It’s a little over four hours, but it’s close enough for them to make the drive and far enough away for a motel. And, to boot, its theme is Great Gatsby. Dean’s a sucker for a good theme, so he snatches the flier and heads home to inform everyone of the news.

+

“A what?” Sam’s incredulous, staring at Dean likes he’s speaking gibberish.

“A Great Gatsby party! C’mon, Sammy, I’m sure Eileen doesn’t wanna sit on her ass in the bunker on New Year’s! Let’s get dressed up! Get outta here. Do somethin’ fun!”

Sam sighs, and Dean can tell he’s mulling it over. Finally, he shrugs. “Fine. Yeah. I guess it could be fun.” He moves toward the hall, running a hand through his hair. “I’ll tell Eileen.”

+

Dean finishes straightening his tie, and takes a deep breath. “Not bad,” he says, giving himself a once over. He smooths his hands down the front of his wine-colored jacket and nods. “Not bad at all.” Lebanon might be the middle of nowhere, but at least it’s near civilization. A quick trip out of town yesterday evening produced a tux for each of them and a dress for Eileen. They’d all split up, picking their own things, before they headed home together.

With a deep breath, Dean opens the door, and meets Cas on the other side. His hair is only slightly disheveled, and he’s wearing the most ridiculous tux. But Dean’s damned if it doesn’t look incredible on him. “Hey, Cas,” he says softly, a smile tugging at his lips.

“Hello, Dean.” How is it possible for his eyes to look that blue? It takes Dean’s breath away. “You look nice. That,” Cas is speaking and pointing to him, and Dean has to bring himself back, “is a good color for you.”

“Yeah,” Dean breathes. He can’t help himself, and grabs Cas’s lapel, dragging him in for a heated kiss. “You, too.”

Sam arrives behind Cas a moment later, dressed smartly in a black tux. Eileen’s at his side in a shining, emerald gown, her hair swept back behind one ear. “Alright, guys, save it for the ball drop. Let’s get going.”

Dean pulls back, but keeps his hands on Cas’s hips. “Eileen, you look stunning. Way too good or my little brother, y’know.”

Eileen flashes Sam a loving smile, and nudges him gently. “I know.”

+

The location, Dean finds, is absolutely fitting for a Gatsby party. It’s a gorgeous, grand mansion, and they can hear the music from the street. The lights are shimmering as people mill around, coming and going.

Dean buttons his jacket as he steps out of the car, and he can’t seem to wipe the smile from his face. “Hell yeah,” he says. “This is awesome!” He doesn’t hesitate in reaching for Cas’s hand, and nods to Sam as they lead the way to the door.

Dean eagerly exchanges cash for tickets and the foursome step into the mansion. He watches Cas as the angel looks around in awe.

Dropping Cas’s hand long enough to grab two glasses of champagne from a passing tray, he hands one to Cas and turns to him with a bright smile. “Here’s lookin’ at us,” he says, clinking his glass against Cas’s. They knock back a swig of the champagne and Dean pulls him in for another kiss.

It’s a new thing for him, the publicity of their relationship. But if the way he feels right now is any indication, he won’t be subduing it any time soon.

“I love you,” he murmurs against Cas’s lips, and grins as he pulls back. He doesn’t wait for Cas to respond. “Let’s check out the rest of this place.”

The organizers of this party have, seemingly, spared no expense. Champagne seems to flow endlessly, the music is perfect, and the atmosphere is intoxicating in itself. He’d made a great choice, he thinks, looking on with a smirk as a guy is tackled into the pool by a girl in a flapper costume.

They meet up with Sam and Eileen once an hour later, and Sam grudgingly admits he’s having a great time. Eileen is elated.

It’s nearing midnight when the music slows to a ballad. Dean pulls a reluctant Cas to the dance floor and they sway together, lost in each other’s eyes. “You make it worth it, Cas,” he says, carding his fingers through the angel’s hair. “The miserable life we lead. The stupid new year. I’m excited for it this year. ‘Cause I have you.”

Cas smiles, his eyes lighting up. “You’ve always made everything worth it, Dean. Even before I knew what it was to love. You’ve always been worth it.”

Ten!

“Worth more than Heaven, huh?”

Nine!

“Heaven, Hell, creation itself.”

Eight!

“Now you’re exaggeratin’.”

Seven!

“I’m not, Dean. Pulling you from Hell… it was the greatest achievement of all.”

Six!

“Because through you, I learned more than just taking orders. I learned about hope.”

Five!

“And forgiveness. And joy.”

Four!

“Art. Love.”

Three!

“In you, Dean, I learned what Home truly meant. I learned what it’s like to be loved and to feel meaning.”

Two!

“Cas, I—“

One!

“I love you, Dean.”

Happy new year!

Dean sighs. “And forever beyond.” He leans in, capturing Cas’s lips in a deep, languid kiss, and they cling to each other, oblivious to the world as the partygoers cheer, and confetti rains down.

In the new year, in their life together, and all the possibilities of the future, they have each other to come home to — to quell each other’s fears and make the other feel loved.

With a smile, Dean brushes his thumb along Cas’s jaw. Happy new year, indeed. >

++

A note: They’re wearing the tuxes J2M were wearing in the Halloween Entertainment Weekly shoot!

HAPPY NEW YEAR, MY LOVES!

[petrichoravellichor]

Written for Day 15 of the Supernatural Deserved Better Creative Challenge (prompt: home).

********************

Dean called him “Miracle.” It was the first time anyone had given him a name, and Miracle liked it almost as much as he liked his new home. 

It was a big home, filled with interesting scents and even more interesting people, although Miracle wasn’t exactly sure what sort of humans Cas and Jack were. They smelled different, but not in a bad way, and Jack in particular gave very good hugs. He even let Miracle sleep in his room on nights when Dean shooed Miracle out into the hallway with a smile and a “Sorry, boy, but there are some things I’d rather you didn’t see” while Cas rolled his eyes and said “Dean, it’s perfectly natural” from over on the bed.

Sam took Miracle running every morning, and Sam was fast, but Miracle was faster. He tried to always stay at least a little bit ahead of Sam, just in case any of the geese down by the pond got any funny ideas. Sometimes Eileen joined them on their runs and convinced Sam to let Miracle have something called a “puppuccino” that came in a little white cup and tasted sweet. Eileen would pat Miracle’s head as he lapped it up, and when he licked her face afterward, she’d ruffle his fur and call him a good boy.

But Miracle’s favorite times were when everyone gathered in the Dean Cave. Dean would make snacks and pile into a recliner with Cas while Sam and Eileen cuddled on the couch and Miracle sprawled out on the rug next to Jack, and they’d laugh and watch movies and at least one person—usually Cas—would sneak Miracle some popcorn (or “pupcorn”, as Dean called it once when he caught Cas in the act, eyes twinkling as everyone but Jack groaned). 

Yes, thought Miracle, he loved having a name and he loved having a home; but more than that, he loved having a family that loved him as much as he loved them.

[gnbrules]

Suptober20 – Day 12: Rewind

The Words Are Finally Here

Asking you to stay

The words are finally here

So let’s rewind

Would you rewind it all the time

--  Rewind By Goldspot

Chuck is gone and Jack has come into his full powers - not quite a god but apparently close enough to keep the balance of the universe in check. They’ve all survived by some lucky miracle and the question is -- what next?

Dean doesn’t pry, but Sam and Eileen seem happy. He can see the way the wind is blowing, that those two might just settle down in a house with a dog and 2.5 kids after all.

Jack says he needs to go to Heaven. There’s much work to be done there, and he needs to gain the trust of the few angels that remain. And then he looks at Cas, all hopeful eyes and sincerity. “Will you come with me, Cas?  Help me be a good leader?”

And Cas, well, his emotions show plainly on his face. He looks as if he’s been shot through with pride and love. Dean gets it, of course. Jack is their kid, but truly so for Cas, and with good reason. Cas was the only one to protect the boy from the start, while he lived in his mother’s womb. Cas was the father Jack searched for when he was only a day old. And Cas, as a fallen angel, understands Jack’s powers and humanity in ways even Sam and Dean can’t.

It makes sense that Cas would go with Jack, even though the idea makes Dean’s stomach sink to his feet.

It’s therefore a shock when Cas’s eyes suddenly slide over Dean then back to Jack, and he says, “I’m sorry, Jack, can I think about this for a bit?”

The disappointment is clear in Jack’s face, but he nods with a graceful smile. The kid has matured enough to not push when things don’t go quite his way. He’s gonna be a good ruler of the universe, Dean decides right then.

It isn’t until that night after they’ve all gone to bed that Cas shows up at Dean’s bedroom door. He knocks first.

“Come in,” Dean answers, and then the angel is standing framed in the doorway.

This is it, thinks Dean. He’s made his decision and he’s come to tell me he’s going off with Jack and he doesn’t know when he’ll be back. This is goodbye.

Again.

Cas doesn’t come much further than the door.  “Hello, Dean,” he says, and damn it if that old phrase doesn’t do things to Dean’s heart. 

“Cas.”

“As you know, I’ve been thinking about going with Jack. To Heaven. To help him be what he needs to be.”

Dean is sitting upright on his bed, and he can’t help the way his fingers clutch at the sheets.  “Oh,” is what Dean says. “So you’re leaving...”

Cas doesn’t say anything until Dean finally looks up to meet his eyes. It’s a trap, of course - that piercing calm blue gaze feels like an x-ray. 

“Actually,” says Cas. “I wanted to know what you thought about it first.”

And well hell if that doesn’t shock Dean to his core. Cas leaves and Dean lets him. That’s how it goes, that’s how it’s always been, and no amount of prayer after the fact has ever seemed to change that. 

But Cas has also never asked Dean for his opinion before.

Dean looks down at his feet. “I don’t know, Cas. You should do what you want. But...I don’t think Jack needs you.”

It comes out badly, and Dean looks up in time to see the pain and anger flash across Cas’s face.  

Stupid, stupid, mouth. 

“He’s still just a kid,” says Cas coolly. “He’s been given the highest responsibility possible. Of course he needs help.”

Then Cas turns and leaves the room without another word, and Dean lays back on his bed feeling sick and empty.

I guess that settles that, thinks Dean.

Cas avoids him the next day, but Jack is still in the bunker making plans, so he knows they haven’t left yet. If Dean thought things were settled then he was wrong, because his own damn mind won’t stop quietly berating him.

He remembers the way it felt last time, letting Cas leave in anger. It wasn’t right and he promised himself he’d never, ever let that happen again. Cas deserves better. 

And so it is Dean that wanders to Cas’s room that night, and it’s Cas that lets him in this time. 

“Dean, what --?”

Dean closes the door behind them and hovers vaguely in Cas’s space. 

“I didn’t mean that Jack doesn’t need you, okay? I just meant...”

“Yes?” Cas probes.

And Dean, it takes all his willpower to man up, but it’s been a long time coming. Cas deserves honesty. Cas deserves everything.

“I just meant...he’s not the only one that needs you, Cas.  And you asked, okay? You asked and I’m telling you - I’m finally telling you - I want you to stay. With me.”

“Dean – ”

“Maybe it’s selfish, maybe it’s dumb, but that’s what I want, Cas. And if you have to leave anyway, I get it, but –”

“Dean. I love you.”

It shuts Dean up mid-rant, his mouth closing and opening again like a fish out of water. “What?”

Cas goes on as if what he just said isn’t groundbreaking, as if he hasn’t just shot Dean skyrocketing into the sun. 

“I want to stay with you too, Dean. And you’re right, Jack has grown a lot. I will always be there for him. He can always call if he needs me, but Heaven isn’t home for me. Hasn’t been, for a long time.”

“Wait, wait. Can we rewind a minute? You -- you love me?”

Cas squints at him. “Yes. And I thought — isn’t that why you want me to stay? So we can be together? Like Sam and Eileen?”

Dean burns red in his cheeks. That is what he said, isn’t it? He needs Cas. He wants Cas by his side. He...

He loves Cas. 

Of course he does. Jesus, how did the angel seem to know before Dean put it together himself?  

Dean rubs his neck, smiles a little awkwardly. “Yeah, Cas. That’s what I want. Because I love you, too.”

Cas beams, radiant as the sun. “Then it’s settled,” he says, and kisses Dean sweetly on the cheek.

And it certainly feels settled when Dean cups Cas’s face and kisses him back.

                                                            ***

Cas tells Jack in the morning, with Dean at his side, and the kid is certainly put out.

“You really won’t come?” he asks. “Why not?”

Cas takes Dean’s hand and links their fingers together, a move that doesn’t go unnoticed by the Nephilim. “I hope you can understand, Jack, but Dean and I –”

“You’re in love,” interrupts Jack excitedly. “I knew it! You’re gonna stay with Dean and get married! That’s great, guys. Of course I understand.”

“Woah - married?” asks Dean, suddenly blushing. “Hold your horses there, kid. That’s not quite the plan.”

“Yet,” adds Cas, and Dean looks at him with a quirked eyebrow. Cas responds with a playful, flirtatious grin. 

“Wait til we tell Sam,” beams Jack. “He said if you hadn’t figured it out by now, you never would. I’m sure glad he was wrong!”

Dean snorts, then smiles over at Cas. “Yeah, me too.”