#behavioral coach

[pocketskittles]

Therapist chick I don’t like complaining about me being short w/her:

“Oh I thought you were an introvert because extroverts use more words and blah blah bbblah “

Me, an extrovert:

“No I’m for sure an extrovert I just don’t like you”

[behavioralcoach]

The 5 Smartest Money Moves You Can Make Right Now

Start the new year off right by getting more bang for your buck.

By Suze Orman

Photo: Sean Lee Davies

Sometimes smart money decisions are about sacrifice: You want to contribute to your 401(k), so you take home less in your paycheck. You want to save for a down payment on a house, so you forgo fancy dinners. But building a secure financial future doesn't have to be all stick, no carrot. Here are a few very easy ways to get something for nothing.

Choose Your Credit Cards Wisely Many cards try to seduce you with rewards points that you can redeem for air miles or hotel stays. That's great, as long as those freebies are things you actually need. (Let's face it: Travel isn't usually a necessity.) If you're going to have a credit card, find one that offers cash back on your purchases so you can use that money to pay bills or meet other financial goals. Suppose you charge (and pay off) $1,000 a month on a no-fee card that offers a minimum 1 percent return: You'll earn an extra $120 a year, which could be enough to cover the annual premium for a $100,000 20-year term life insurance policy.  Max Out Your 401(k) Contributions If your employer contributes to your 401(k), you typically need to kick in a percentage of your salary to get the maximum benefit, which is often 50 cents for every dollar you set aside up to a limit (typically 6 percent). That free money may be the biggest financial carrot out there—and yet, 23 percent of workers who are eligible for a match miss out because they're not contributing enough of their earnings. If you're entitled to a guaranteed 50 percent return on an investment, why wouldn't you take it?  Delay Social Security You can apply for Social Security as early as age 62, but the benefit you'll receive will be 25 to 30 percent less than the amount you'll take home if you wait until you reach full retirement age (between 66 and 67 if you were born between 1943 and 1959; 67 if you were born in 1960 or later). Hold out until age 70, and your check could be 76 percent larger than if you apply at age 62. That's a significant reward. If you're married and simply can't afford to delay benefits for both of you, at least have the higher earner wait to collect payment.  Take a Shorter-Term Car Loan When it comes to buying a car, I'm all for short-term thinking. Let's say you take out a $15,000 car loan. Pay it back in 36 months rather than 73 to 84 months (the terms for 25 percent of auto loans during the first quarter of 2014) and you'll save at least $980 in interest charges, at a 4 percent rate. Your car is guaranteed to depreciate—but holding on to hundreds of extra dollars in rewards alleviates the sting.  Do What You Can to Save for a Rainy Day According to a national survey conducted by the corporate education firm Financial Finesse, more than eight in ten Americans feel financially stressed—including 76 percent of those who make at least $200,000 a year. Not surprisingly, the most anxious respondents were the ones who were less likely to have emergency funds: Just 8 percent of people who reported having "overwhelming" stress and 22 percent who said they were experiencing "high" stress had a backup plan. Conversely, nearly nine in ten respondents who claimed to have no financial stress had money set aside to deal with unexpected expenses. There is nothing, and I mean nothing, keeping you from putting $60 a month—that's only $2 a day—in an emergency fund. (My free expense tracker at suzeorman.com can help you identify ways to save.) In just four years, you'll wind up with nearly $3,000—and the peace of mind that's a reward in itself. Read more: http://www.oprah.com/home/Suze-Orman-Smartest-Money-Advice#ixzz3OxOtMedN

[behavioralcoach]

Study: Be optimistic to Keep The Heart Healthy

A recent study has found that people having an optimistic approach in all walks of life are likely to have more healthy hearts.Optimism doesn't just lead to a better outlook on life, but possibly an improved one as well, as a new study finds it can lead to a healthier heart. The study, conducted by the researchers at University of Illinois, involved more than 5,100 adults to examine the relation between optimism and heart health. The researchers found that people who have upbeat outlooks and positive approach in life have remarkably better cardiovascular health. Rosalba Hernandez, a professor of social work at the University of Illinois who led the study, said that the people having optimism at its highest levels have two times the odds of being in supreme cardiovascular health against those pessimistic counterparts. Hernandez also stresses that this association remains important, even after adjusting for poor mental health and several other socio-demographic characteristics. During the study, the researchers surveyed the people and assessed their levels of optimism, mental health and physical health, based upon their self-reported extant medical diagnoses of liver, arthritis and kidney disease. The total health scores of the participants ranged between 0 and 14, with the higher total score indicating toward better health. A research paper detailed in the January/February 2015 issue of Health Behavior and Policy Review showed that the optimist people had remarkably better cholesterol and blood sugar levels against their pessimist counterparts. Moreover, the study showed the positive people were more physically active, healthier body mass indexes and were also less likely to smoke.

[behavioralcoach]

10 Steps to Creating Monday Momentum:

1. Decide in advance that you are going to have a great week. Your attitude determines your altitude and it starts right here with the decision. Expect success, expect the best, and be prepared to invest the very best of yourself in everything you do.

2. Define Success more clearly. Envision exactly what it means to have a great week. Does success mean productivity? Fun? Speed? Quality? Progress? Completion? What elements do you need to create in order to realize your vision this week?

3. Map out your week on Sunday evening. At first this may seem challenging but after a few tries, you will be in awe of how easy it is to set yourself up for success. Here are some questions to get you started: What are your priorities for the week? What are the essentials you absolutely must accomplish and in what order of importance? What do you need to do this week to meet your Goals for the month, for the year?

4. Schedule your actions and priorities into your calendar so that you know when you will do them.

5. Create measures of accountability. Are you motivated by pain or pleasure? Does it light a fire under your posterior to know there is a fun reward at the finish line for doing what you promised or are you more motivated by the pain of having to pay for NOT doing it? Determine your own personal rewards you will enjoy for following through on your commitments and what penalties can you impose on yourself if you don't? Bring in a friend or peers for extra reinforcement. Having someone to hold you accountable will keep you honest and give you an extra edge. There is nothing like succeeding or failing in front of an audience. You can raise the bar on this as high as you need to.

6. Go to bed early Sunday evening. Stretch or meditate prior to bedtime. You will feel more rested when you wake up and you will have energy, vigor and enthusiasm to begin your day. There's nothing as energizing and momentum building as arising with clarity, getting a jump on the day and being ahead of schedule, rather than feeling like you're behind schedule or playing catch up.

7. On Monday morning rise a little earlier, get in a quick workout, even if it's just a 15 minute walk or ride on the exercise bike. Wake up your brain and get those endorphins flowing. You will burn more fat, feel GREAT and get it out of the way so you're free to move on to other things.

8. Eat a healthy breakfast. This will provide you with the fuel to tackle your top priorities. (planning your week in advance means planning your meals in advance if you want to be super productive, energized and stay away from fast foods, which are a huge energy drain) What you put into your mouth has a direct effect on your productivity, efficiency and mental clarity.

9. Listen to one hour of an empowering audio program while you're working out and eating breakfast. This will help you with the mental motivation and get you going with the right attitude. I recommend The Time Commandments audio program.

10. At the end of each day and the end of each week, review what you did or didn't do. Make adjustments where necessary and keep building on your strengths and celebrating your successes. Have fun and remember that small improvements add up over time. Imagine how much more clarity, motivation and achievement you will experience after growing and improving consistently for 52 weeks!

Momentum breeds momentum.

Unleashing these powerful strategies will condition you to seize the day every day. You will condition yourself to know where you are going, get moving and you will have all the motivation and Momentum you need to carry you through the week.

Live Your Dreams Source - http://www.selfgrowth.com/

[behavioralcoach]

How to Turn Around Troubled Teens

Research reveals that get-tough tactics may worsen rates of juvenile delinquency

Oct 16, 2014 |By Scott O. Lilienfeld and Hal Arkowitz

Mike S. (not his real name) was 13 years old when one of us (Lilienfeld) met him on an inpatient psychiatric ward, where Lilienfeld was a clinical psychology intern. Mike was articulate and charming, and he radiated warmth. Yet this initial impression belied a disturbing truth. For several years Mike had been in serious trouble at school for lying, cheating and assaulting classmates. He was verbally abusive toward his biological mother, who lived alone with him. Mike tortured and even killed cats and bragged about experiencing no guilt over these actions. He was finally brought to the hospital in the mid-1980s, after he was caught trying to con railroad workers into giving him dynamite, which he intended to use to blow up his school. According to psychiatry's standard guidebook, theDiagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (now in its fifth edition), Mike's diagnosis was conduct disorder, a condition marked by a pattern of antisocial and perhaps criminal behavior emerging in childhood or adolescence.

Psychologists have long struggled with how to treat adolescents with conduct disorder, or juvenile delinquency, as the condition is sometimes called when it comes to the attention of the courts. Given that the annual number of juvenile court cases is about 1.2 million, these efforts are of great societal importance. One set of approaches involves “getting tough” with delinquents by exposing them to strict discipline and attempting to shock them out of future crime. These efforts are popular, in part because they quench the public's understandable thirst for law and order. Yet scientific studies indicate that these interventions are ineffective and can even backfire. Better ways to turn around troubled teens involve teaching them how to engage in positive behaviors rather than punishing them for negative ones.

You're in the Army Now One get-tough technique is boot camp, or “shock incarceration,” a solution for troubled teens introduced in the 1980s. Modeled after military boot camps, these programs are typically supervised by a drill instructor and last from three to six months. They emphasize strict rules and swift punishments (such as repeated push-ups) for disobedience, along with a regimen of physical work and demanding exercise. According to the National Institute of Justice, 11 states operated such programs in 2009. Indeed, Mike S. was sent to a boot camp program following his discharge from the hospital.

Even so, research has yielded at best mixed support for boot camps. In a 2010 review of 69 controlled studies, criminologists Benjamin Meade and Benjamin Steiner, both then at the University of South Carolina, revealed that such programs produced little or no overall improvement in offender recidivism. For reasons that are unclear, some of them reduced rates of delinquency, but others led to higher rates. Boot camps that incorporated psychological treatments, such as substance abuse counseling or psychotherapy, seemed somewhat more effective than those that did not offer such therapies, although the number of studies was too small to draw firm conclusions.

Another method is “Scared Straight,” which became popular following an Academy Award–winning documentary (Scared Straight!), which was filmed in a New Jersey state prison in 1978. Typically these programs bring delinquents and other high-risk teens into prisons to interact with adult inmates, who talk bluntly about the harsh realities of life behind bars. Making adolescents keenly aware of prison life is supposed to deter them from criminal careers. Yet the research on these interventions is not encouraging. In a 2003 meta-analysis (quantitative review) of nine controlled studies of Scared Straight programs, criminal justice researcher Anthony Petrosino, now at the research agency WestEd, and his colleagues showed that these treatments backfired, boosting the odds of offending by 60 to 70 percent.

The verdict for other get-tough interventions, such as juvenile transfer laws, which allow teens who commit especially heinous offenses to be tried as adults, is no more promising. In a 2010 summary, psychologist Richard Redding of Chapman University found higher recidivism rates among transferred adolescent offenders than among nontransferred ones.

Perils of Punishment Psychologists do not know for sure why get-tough treatments are ineffective and potentially harmful, but the psychological literature holds several clues. First, researchers have long found that punishment-based strategies tend to be less effective than reward-based strategies for lasting behavioral change, in part because they teach people what not to do but not what to do. Second, studies indicate that highly confrontational therapeutic approaches are rarely effective in the long term. For example, in a 1993 controlled trial psychologist William Miller of the University of New Mexico and his colleagues found that counselors who used confrontational styles with problem drinkers—for example, by taking them to task for minimizing the extent of their drinking problem—had significantly less success in helping their clients overcome their addictions than did counselors who used supportive styles that relied on empathy. Similarly, a 2010 review by criminal justice researcher Paul Klenowski of Clarion University and his collaborators found that delinquency programs that involved confrontational tactics, such as berating children for misbehavior, were less effective than programs that did not use them.

What is more, adolescents with conduct disorder often enter treatment angry and alienated, harboring feelings of resentment toward authority. Get-tough programs may fuel these emotions, boosting teens' propensity to rebel against parents and teachers. Finally, some programs may inadvertently provide adolescents with role models for bad behavior. For example, some of the at-risk teens exposed to prisoners in Scared Straight programs may perceive them as cool and worth emulating.

These results show that merely imposing harsh discipline on young offenders or frightening them is unlikely to help them refrain from problematic behavior. Instead teens must learn enduring tools—including better social skills, ways to communicate with parents and peers, and anger management techniques—that help them avoid future aggression. Several effective interventions do just that, including cognitive-behavior therapy, a method intended to change maladaptive thinking patterns and behaviors, and multisystemic therapy, in which parents, schools and communities develop programs to reinforce positive behaviors. Another well-supported method, aimed at improving behavior in at-risk children younger than eight years, is parent-child interaction therapy. Parents are coached by therapists in real time to respond to a child's behavior in ways that strengthen the parent-child bond and provide incentives for cooperation [see “Behave!” by Ingrid Wickelgren; Scientific American Mind, March/April 2014].

The negative data on get-tough programs remind us that we should be wary of our subjective impressions of strategies that simply seem right or that we feel ought to work. Although we lost track of Mike S., we now know that a concerted effort to teach him more adaptive behaviors would have been more likely to put him on a productive path than would any attempt to scare him straight.

This article was originally published with the title "Kid Gloves for Young Offenders?."

 Source - http://www.scientificamerican.com

[behavioralcoach]

Are you addicted to unhappiness?

Is there a certain comfortable familiarity with being dissatisfied?

Published on March 5, 2014 by David Sack, M.D. in Where Science Meets the Steps

Characteristics of the Chronically Unhappy

How do you know if you’re one of these people who live in a perpetual state of unhappiness? People who are addicted to unhappiness tend to:

Find reasons to be miserable when life gets “too good.”

Prefer to play the victim role and blame others rather than take personal responsibility for their choices.

Compete with friends and colleagues to see who has it the hardest.

Have difficulty setting and achieving goals, or conversely achieve goals only to find that they can’t enjoy their success.

Struggle to bounce back when things don’t go their way.

Distract, escape or cope by using drugs, alcohol, sex, food, or other addictive or compulsive behaviors.

Stop taking care of their basic needs, such as a healthy diet, regular exercise, and adequate sleep.

Feel enslaved to their emotions and powerless to change.

Feel dissatisfied even when life is going well.

Have dramatic, unfulfilling relationships.

Is Happiness a Choice?

It is often said that “happiness is a choice.” But then why aren’t more people happy?

Some people find happiness even in situations that would challenge the most optimistic person; some are unhappy despite having it all. For some, happiness is fleeting and depends on their present circumstances, whereas others seem to be generally happy or generally unhappy no matter what is happening in their lives. Then there’s the issue of how to define happiness — by outward success, inward satisfaction, or something else?

In many cases, it may be true that happiness is a choice. To some extent, we choose our own thoughts and reactions, which impact the way we feel, and can improve our happiness quotient by taking steps to change our thinking (e.g., keeping a gratitude journal, staying mindful of the present moment, accepting what is or developing healthier coping mechanisms). We can view our emotions as a signal that some aspect of life needs to change and take action to return to a better state of mind.

But for about 20 percent of American adults, mental health disorders such as depression or anxiety may mean that happiness is always just out of reach. They do not choose to be depressed or anxious; they do not know another way of being. While choosing to be happy, in these cases, is more complicated than making a choice to think positively, there is one important choice that can be made: the decision to get help, such as cognitive behavioral therapy.

The unfortunate reality is that most chronically unhappy people refuse to get help. Nearly half of those with mental illness never seek treatment. Whether it’s fear, comfort, lack of awareness or something else, we can’t be sure. What we do know is that unhappiness does not have to be terminal. With counseling and treatment, there is hope for happiness becoming the new norm.

  David Sack, M.D., is board certified in Addiction Medicine and Addiction Psychiatry. As CEO of Elements Behavioral he oversees mental health and addiction treatment programs in Arizona, California, Texas, Utah, Florida, Pennsylvania, and Tennessee.

Source - www.psychologytoday.com

[behavioralcoach]

Mindfulness in the workplace: 6 tips to stay focused

 A few simple behavioral changes can help.

Focus on your breathing to help you stay in the moment.

Take occasional brief breaks and let your mind deliberately wander, then return to the task more focused.

Stay well fed and well hydrated so that thirst and hunger don’t distract you.

Write down thoughts about things you need to remember to do at home. This gets them out of your head and helps you concentrate on the task at hand.

Create a work environment that helps you concentrate. For example, you might position yourself to get more daylight or to get away from noisy co-workers.

Be mindful of the risks of repetitive work. Focus can lag when workers do the same thing over and over again. Consider job rotation to avoid the risk.