Discover Top Posts Tagged with #being new

*reviving from the dead*

We are slowly regaining to a state of spoons perhaps and might be able to finish our fusion asks after like what, two or three weeks

MAYBE WE WILL EVEN LOOK AT OUR DMS >:o

#alter: riku #damn though man #genders been taxing us #plus work #being new

I will rise as a glorious Phoenix! I speak it into existence, make it so!

#empath #heart #human contact #thevibrationofmesd #love #quotes #pheonix #risefromtheashes #i will be okay #live my extra life #live #longing #being new

Found online

#thevibrationofmesd #taurus #purpose #taurus the rock #taurus love #taurus life #being new #new beginnings #new directions

New: the pros and cons

I’m not a quiet person. I’m just... uncomfortable? The group is so small and everyone knows everyone and I’m... new.

People love new things. New cars new phones new cloths.

But when you’re the new person, you want to crawl up into a little ball, and no one tries to pull you out of it. Because you’re new. And new people aren’t nearly as interesting as new things.

#being new #awkwardness #socially awkward #short prose

Kimmer ‘n I were hanging out with a friend, talking about this ‘n that, when along the way I heard our friend say

“No need to live out someone else’s narrative.”

You can look at that sentence a bunch of different ways, of course. No need to live out someone else’s story. No need to live out someone else’s intentions. No need to live out someone else’s life.

From the musical, “Chess”, I caught this riff on the idea:

In a way It's someone else's story I don't see myself As taking part at all

No need. To live out. Someone else’s narrative.

The tricky thing about adulting, especially early adulting, is that we often don’t recognize how we’re living out someone else’s story. As a girlfriend or a boyfriend. As a son or a daughter. The tricky thing about adulting, especially new adulting, is that often we don’t know how to do anything else. When we take our cues from others for years, it’s easy to continue taking our cues from other others. It’s easy, you see, to propel our own lives with the momentum of someone else’s. With someone else’s passion. Someone else’s ideas. Someone else’s will.

If I”m being honest, it’s easier than taking the wheel ourselves and all the obligations that go with being in full control.

If I’m being honest, it’s scary to take complete control of our own, new lives when we don’t even know what we don’t know.

If I’m being honest, it doesn’t seem like that big a deal to be a reflection of someone else’s choices. Especially if that person is someone we love. Especially if that person is someone we trust. Especially if that person is someone with authority over us, real or perceived.

If I’m being honest.

Love, especially, is an unwitting accomplice when it comes to obscuring the fact that we’ve turned over the keys to our lives to someone else.

We would, of course, never think to submit our will to the will of someone else. Of course we wouldn’t in this modern age.

Unless we’re in love, of course. In which case, the question never comes up.

Suddenly, we’re living a life of submission and we don’t even realize it.

Now, your choice about your own life is your choice. Just as my choice is mine. The only reason I’m banging on this drum tonight is that sometimes, more often than you’d guess, submitting your will to someone else’s will, no matter how in love you are with that person, leads to unhealthy situations or outcomes... leads to unsafe situations or outcomes... mostly, though, what I see is that it delays or derails futures. Futures those of us in question would otherwise choose.

As an adult, one of the phrases I hear the most over the years is “I didn’t mean to...” or “We didn’t mean to...”. As a kid, one of the things I would’ve said most but didn’t (’cause I wasn’t huge on apologies or explanations) was “I didn’t mean to...” or “We didn’t mean to...”. By which I mean to say I backed into a whole lotta consequences when I was growing up. There were courses I chose without regard to outcomes, possibilities, or consequences. So whatever those outcomes, possibilities, or consequences turned out to be... they always came as a surprise. A complete. Shock. Which is kind of, sort of, okay when you’re a kid with a certain amount of cover from your parents. But when it’s you and all you, that kind of laissez faire approach to life enables unforced errors with wild abandon. As it turns out, “Whatever will be, will be” sounds a whole lot better than it works.

Is all.

I guess the thing I wanna underline in big, thick, black markers, is that you, me, all of us adults in the world, new & not-so-new, have to fully understand (strive to understand) our circumstances in order to move our lives towards our goals.

In order to.

Move our lives.

Towards our goals.

We have to think our way forward. We have to double check our choices.

There are traps, is the thing. And usually they’re obscured by feelings, by emotion. And those feelings are the very instruments that enable someone else, someone who's not even worthy, to control, direct, delay, or derail our futures.

So yeah.

No need to live out someone else’s story.