When I first started to think of myself as bi, I really felt like I didn't "need" Pride and didn't really belong to the LGBTQ+ community because I've been in mostly hetero-passing relationships. I was afraid that I was somehow taking something from people who were "more queer" by claiming my place among them.
But since coming out, I've come to recognize not only the real pain and heartache that staying closeted was causing me, but also that I grew up surrounded by explicit biphobia. Like, multiple people told me, even before I had a sexual identity, some variation of:
"I guess I get being gay, but I can't wrap my head around bisexuals. It seems like they'll just take whatever they can get."
Before I even experienced sexual attraction, I'd internalized that bi people are greedy, oversexed, unselective, and attention-seeking. So now, three years into being out and deeply in love with my straight spouse, I am pissed and loud about bi+ issues.
Bi people in hetero-passing relationships belong in the community.
Gay people who grew up in supportive spaces belong in the community.
Trans people who go stealth belong in the community
Nonbinary people who pass as their AGAB belong in the community
Marginalized people do not need to guard the gate to mutual support.
