"They mean to marry her to the son of the Sea Snake?" Qwynn questioned quietly as she sharpened her sword. The chuckle tore from her mouth without any hesitation. "Fools. Only a Dragon would wed a Sea Serpent." She sighed before turning to eye her father who was busily finalizing a marriage contract.
"The Gods will approve this match," he replied as she rewet the stone.
"And you'll accept an heir as we agreed with her brother's seed?" she asked carefully.
"Yes, you've quited the Ironborn and saved our House, it is the least the Gods could ask me to help you."
---
House of the Dragon Episode 5 "We light the Way".
WE open with Lady Rhea outside of Runestone ,this is a fucking Royce in the Vale of Arryn. An older House that once ruled much of the Vale in the times before the Andals. I liked how the used the open spaces of Scotland for this shot, and the runic patterning on her leather armor is nice. And we see - fuuuuck boy in his splendour. Fucking hell Daemon, you are more irritating. Rhea just tears into him. She appears to be unsure, as he engineers death apparently by spooking her horse or at least her obvious crippling. A reason to end his wedding. This show is intent on killing women again hooray for writers!
Back to the seas outside dragonstone we see Viserys throwing up as Lord STrong offers him a handkerchief. The princess is still with her shitty Knight Ser Criston (I'll be tearing him apart later.) They have sailed for diftmark to reunite the oldest Valyrian Houses outside the Celtigars in all of Westeros. You'd think they would have done this earlier? Rather than a Hightower upstart.
Otto leaves in full fanfare and we can see Otto has paid the price. His daughter makes a point that this is his reason. Honestly, if he hadn't push his own daughter this wouldn't have fucking happened. Yup, I am still blaming the shitty dudes for this situation because a lot of this is fucking sexism. Rhaenyra if the Hightowers had stood beside her would have been a powerful monarch. INstead, Otto sacrificed his own daughter to create a secondary line from Viserys. The bloody idiot.
Everything in Redkeep is predictably drab before we switch back to Driftmark where the Targs have come to rebuild their bonds. Finally seeing a fucking tower we should have seen in GoT is nice. Laenor greets the King and his entourage outside with his lover, Joffrey Lonmouth. Back in the Godswood of the Red Keep Larys Strong continues his families increasing power over the Hightowers on the Small Council. I wonder what Larys plans to do. Is he here to push the Queen further away from her old friend? But, the Strongs pushed for the binding with Lord Corlys. This places them firmly in what will become the Black Council.
But here we have Lord Larys pushing for a split with Alicent in a manner which makes me think he'll be a green. Yes, I have not read Fire and Blood, so I'm going on a vague notion here.
The Black swill be the pro Rhae faction at court while the Green's back her brother Aegon II.
BACK to Driftmark, the halls of Driftmark are stark, but hold a love of ancient Valyrian as well as the Sea. A massive murial displaying a Velaryon ship and we notice that upon her arrival Rhaenys sees her cousin is ill. THey all speak of Rhea's death. Lord Corlys' decides to negotiate hard and hearing a laugh from a trouser (yes I love how we can see that Rhaenys is comfortable with herself and dresses more like a sailor). The King's offer sees the continuation of the Velaryons with whoever takes the Iron Throne being a Targ and thus continues the Dragon Dynasty.
Laenor in Velaryon Blue and finally seeing Rhae in a vividly red and gold Targ dress is a nice addition. The two make an equitable agreement so they can have their respective lovers. One that would have benefited both.
The Sea Snakes prices in High Tide are impressive and shows how the man has been everywhere. And among these decisions, we can see that Corlys' own homophobia coming out. All Rhaenys wants is her son to be safe and to be himself. These two parents are worried. Seeing all these pent-up feelings which will come to form the Black Council.
Seeing Joffrey and Laenor together makes the later's death (yes if this fucking episode has Bury Your Gays you Bet Yourself I spoil myself) I want to savor his character. The scene where the two kiss and they discuss the paramour of Rhae aka Ser Criston (IMo it should be Alys, but fuck the writers). Ser Criston is seemingly thinking he can be more affectionate with the Crown Princess. But, predictably he suggests they run away. You motherfucker, a -fucking princess- cannot just runaway. She wants power, and instead he says to run away. This is a good show that while he wants to help her this is about his fucking ego.
Not what she wants.
I wanna say the actress behind Rhae here really shows her emotion here. Milly brings a good level of royalty and as she tells Ser Criston the man cracks. We can see his vivid emotions. But this is where Ser Cristion is thinking about himself. No one really gives three fucks about Daemon, no one is going to think about him killing his wife. But Criston here will have the rage which will see him do such terrible things so very soon.
The King returns to the Red Keep and collapses sowing that the time of the end of his reign is coming. Ser Criston goes to the Queen and i think this is where the asshole decides to start his place as backing the Greens. Alicent interrogates Ser Criston and like the scorned lover he is he caves. At the girl's instigation, yes, she came on to him, and this brings up a question. Can a Kingsguard walk away from such a thing? I think that as a Kingsguard he would have had an easier time versus any poor sod of a servant.
Criston can easily speak to the King, and as a Guard he could have easily reasoned out a less worthless punishment than what he alludes too. I wanna say that Alicent's feelings here in how she is is so fucking vivid. It makes the Alaenyra ship so much more real for me. Plus, it sells the harsher reality of being a woman even a noble one in the lands of the SEven Kingdoms.
Lyonel here as the Maesters leave is asked, "Will they remember me as a good king, Lionel?"
Dammit, Lionel has played his game well, but what is he going to say? That the Dragons will all die out to just two members in a hundred years? That all Dragons that fly will be dead except for three fossilized eggs.
Viserys is a grand example of what a man who just -tries- to do best will accomplish.
Splitting to an open scene we see Syrax and Seasmoke flying together. Both are a bit more similar in design than the others. Seasmoke appears to have a large paddle-like bit on his tail. All the great Houses of the Lords Paramount arrive and we see the wedding beginning to start. And Jason makes a shitty Lannister joke that would get a slap from Lann the Quick. The Velaryons arrive in fashion and we see a LOT of them. I mean a lot of kids as well as older members. Wow, I didn't realize that their House was so large at this point.
Ser Gerold was interrupted here, but we can see he was trying to make a point that they should look into Rhea's death. But in rolls Daemon like a fucking asshole he is all dressed in Targ black with red sleeves. So they have to ready a chair for him. And, Alicent makes her fucking arrival like a girlboss dress in -GREEN-, yup we have announced her faction the Greens. Yup, love this color choice here to show how we have the two Queens of Westeros which will go to war.
Apparently, Green is also the color Hightower uses to call its banners to war. Dammit, this is a bold statement. Viserys is desperate like all of his descendants to rebuild the freehold in someway. Perhaps a desire created as far back as the Empire of the Dawn? (See David LIghtbringer for his massive theory). This scene is well blocked and acted. I love how everyone is doing their best to stare at the new couple. Ser Joffrey is masking and Criston wants to murder Laenor like the sick selfish pup he is. Daemon is just enjoying all the drama after murdering his Wife. We get a nice crowded dance scene as various LOrds and Ladie's dance. WE see her Uncle there and yes, the Hightowers have come to oppose the Velaryons.
Daemon continues to cause issue with the Vale and we see everyone is giving the brat a sideye. THen he decides to eye poor Laena, dammit, no fuck that shit. Fuck Daemon! Fuck him to high hells to the very far north where he might freeze!
All of this episode does is signal and set up the tragedy that is the Targaryn fall. We know all Daemon want is his niece (cuz we gotta love that Targ incest). Matt Smith is a genius in this role. The wedding celebrations push forward as the entire fucking feast comes full swing. the politicking continues as the various Houses chat. Joffrey head's over and decides to activate the homophobic self-preservation of House Cole. Dammit, fucking Lonmouths. More incest with Daemon trying to get his freak on again and this time he seems intent on going too far.
A scream erupts in the crowd as SEr Criston brutally murders Ser Criston is brutally murdering Joffrey. LIon signals his man to get Rhae out and we see that BURY YOUR GAYS HAS HAPPENED. I mean it, Ser Criston should have been executed for what he did. He murdered a man of a powerful house of the fucking BETROTHED who was unarmed at the wedding of the fucking Princess. This scene is unnecessary and painful to watch.
The Coward wanders off to the Godswood to off himself and yes, I am hard on Criston here, But that's because a lot of his decisions are based on -his- ego. He didn't need to murder Ser Joffrey. Jorffrey was a prat with his comment, but he was not a threat. This is all about Cole's need to justify his manliness and how he's being "cuckholded" by the King Consort. The Queen stos Ser Criston, the King falls down likely dead or near death.
Gay Canon
Laenor and Joffrey are officially w wronged couple here. What was the point of adding Laenor as gay if you're going to murder his lover in the same fucking episode. Classic bury your gays. This was one of the most well acted series, but I think in a lot of ways this was an example of the writers -not- thinking about how they did shit. If Joffrey was shown earlier and we had _MORE_ of Laenor being gay they could have easily avoided this as early as EPISODE FUCKING THREE with the Stepstones!
The hatred between Rhae and Alicent is so thick I would need a Valyrian Steel knife to cut it. I have so many ideas for a story that requires a lot of deep lore references, but trust me I'll have it out by season 2 after I let it percolate for a while. Current working name is "Waltz of Dragons".
Hottakes
