#brother mark

[johnschneiderblog]

Farewell, Brother

Mark's final request - that's him in the Barbie-pink bag - was that half his ashes go in his favorite fishing hole (the Detroit River) and that the other half get deposited near his original hunting blind on the 80 acres in northern Michigan we've hunted since 1968.

His kids took care of the river. His daugher assigned the second part to my two surving brothers and me. We did it Thursday, during deer camp, which seemed especially appropriate.

Obviously the ashes-spreading ritual benefits the living, not the dead. Fulfilling a loved one's fnal request is a sacred duty and it feels that way.

As for the bag ... Sorry, Mark, I didn't choose it.

[fiction-quotes]

Cadfael's fragrent domain, dewy from the dawn and already warming into drunken sweetness in the rising sun, filled his senses with the kind of pleasure on which an ascetic church sometimes frowns, finding something uneasily sinful in pure delight. There were times when young Brother Mark, who worked with him this delectable field, felt that he ought to confess his joy among his sins, and meekly accept some appropriate penance. He was still very young, there were excuses to be found for him. Brother Cadfael had more sense, and no such scruples. The manifold gifts of God are there to be delighted in, to fall short of joy would be ingratitude.

  —  Saint Peter’s Fair (Ellis Peters)

[johnschneiderblog]

Continuing to continue

Not long ago, it would have been impossible to imagine deer camp witout brother Mark (far right in this 1980 photo) or cousin Joe (far left.) (In the middle is brother Kenny, who's fine.).

Yet, there we were, going about our deer-camp business, like a lizard that that loses its tail but continues to continue. Smaller, but perfectly viable.

Mark died one year ago today and Joe, who had never missed a camp in the 55 years it has existed, was sidelined this year by a progressive illness. It's unlikely he'll be back.

More so than any of us, Mark and Joe embodied deer camp. They were all in all the time. Could our camp stand without its two main pillars ...?

But there we were, carrying on with no more that a slight wobble. A stranger walking into camp and hearing the poker-table banter, or the raucous laughter, would never notice the scent of grief that mingled with the wood smoke.

That's because those present outnumbered the absent.

It's because a new 12-year-old was there to help shore up the gap, with several more in the wings.

It's because we all know that this annual bundle of rituals that Joe and Mark were so instrumental in creating is bigger that the sum of its individuals.

It's deer camp.

[johnschneiderblog]

What would Mark say?

I'd love to know what my dearly departed brother would make of the first-place - yes, first place - Detroit Lions. What would he say ...?

Certainly not his standard "Same old Lions," spoken with a gleefully sardonic smile.

Mark, a life-long Detroiter, died last November at age 69, meaning he was born in 1953, making him too young to have remembered the Lions championship of 1957.

For Mark's whole life, the Lions stunk, winning only one playoff game and achieving the NFL's longest postseason win drought. And who could forget 2008 when the Lions made history by losing all 16 of their games.

But did Mark despair? Oh, no - he wore an "0-16" T-shirt and laughed his big laugh. "Same old Lions."

A defense mechanism ...? Maybe, but one that he relished, because his connection to the team went beyond wins and losses. The Lions were part of the fabric of Detroit; so was Mark.

It's too bad Mark's not alive to enjoy the success. You can bet that he wouldn't just be riding the bandwagon, he'd be driving it.

[johnschneiderblog]

Mark’s going-away party

The kids, the kids-in-law, the grandkids .... they’ll all be in Michigan this weekend for my brother’s final bash.

It’s not a funeral. It’s not a wake. It’s not even a memorial service, really. It’s a  party, which may seem strange considering the reason for the gathering.

On the other hand, it’s exactly what Mark would have ordered: some tail tales, some laughs, some songs, a joyful gathering of the tribe.

We’ve already shed our tears; now it’s time to celebrate the life that was.

[johnschneiderblog]

Thank you, Brother

On Nov.18, the day my brother, Mark, died, Sharon was in Washington, D.C. with friends (her version of deer camp). I had returned from my camp and was home alone.

I already had spoken with my siblings, my kids and everybody else I could think of who might help fill the void in which I found myself.

I needed something to do. Figuring I could brood just as easily in one of the deer stands on my 12 acres here in lower Michigan, I suited up, strapped on my muzzleloader and headed out.

On one hand, it seemed absurd that I could muster any interest in anything other than my grief. And, to be honest, I wondered how I might be judged. On the other hand, I knew what Mark would say: “You can’t shoot a deer from your couch; get your butt out there.”

Another thing: We had spent so much time deer hunting together that I knew I would feel closer to him in the woods.

Shortly after 5 p.m. as daylight was starting to fade, a fine 8-pointer sauntered within range. Mark’s voice in the wind - or maybe it was in my head - said  “Here you go; now don’t screw it up.”

I didn’t. It’s one hunt I’ll surely remember.

[johnschneiderblog]

Congratulations, Mark

The oldest of my three younger, brothers, Mark, has suffered some severe health problems lately. After being hospitalized for six weeks or so, he’s now in a Detroit-area nursing home trying to regain his strength.

He was a  member of the Teamsters union for 45 years, but, because of his illness, can no longer work. On Thursday, the youngest of my younger brothers and I took Mark to the union hall, near Tiger stadium, to pick up his retirement watch.

The trip - Mark’s first venture back into the world since he entered the hospital - meant the world to him. He already has plans to pass the watch on to his son, who will pass it on to his son, etc., etc., etc. ..

[gospelfellowships]

Video: Walking in the Full Equipping of God as Small Gatherings of Believers

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MkpszW7XNqE&w=420&h=315]

One of these that is very important to lay hold of is that the United States of America which has become sacred ground for most Christians feeling in some degree it is their lucky charm out…

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