I’m seeking thoughtful readers for my gothic vampire novel, The Dowager Prince (2026). It’s set between Soviet Russia and Spain in the 1940s—think blood wine, burning carriages, obsession, and betrayal.
✨ If you enjoy:
Gothic/dark fantasy
Complex characters
Family betrayal & power struggles
Atmospheric, historical settings
…you might enjoy reading this.
I’m mainly looking for:
What hooked you / what lost you
Which characters stood out
Any places where the story felt unclear or slow
If you’re interested, DM me and tell me a little about what you like to read. I’ll send you the first few chapters (PDF).
Thank you—it means the world to me to share this story outside my own head. 🖤
***
I am looking for accounts that are active so as to avoid having my works reproduced or stolen. Apparently, that's a thing.
So… Sora and Kairi’s entire conversation at the start of this is based on one that Buffy and Angel had in “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”, that I felt was too perfect to pass up for this.
Enjoy!
Also… it should hopefully be clear in the story, but Kairi—who is the PoV here—is definitely being an unreliable narrator in this fic, and being WAY too hard on herself.
Have Heart
It was a hideous day outside: rain was falling in torrents, the wind was howling, and there was an eclipse keeping anyone from seeing the sun.
But even though the weather conditions were bleak, the past hours hadn't been a complete loss for the Guardians of Light. While Ava had, unfortunately, gone back to the Master of Master's side after he'd told her how he loved her like a dad would, they'd gotten Aced to their side when they'd explained to him that even they thought he'd had good intentions—even if his father and siblings couldn’t see that—but had just gone about things the wrong way…
And maybe that was why Kairi and Sora were having a heart-to-heart themselves right now, in Merlin's Study, while everyone else was outside trying to fix Radiant Garden’s claymores...
"I saw you on the day you became the most popular girl at school, y'know,” Sora said now, as he held onto Kairi’s hand and looked earnestly into her eyes. “It was a beautiful day, where the sun was actually shining unlike now... and you had a lollipop in your mouth, and walked down the stairs to the courtyard… and I fell in love with you then.”
"Why?" Kairi couldn't keep herself from asking. Because it was beyond her how Sora had ever cared for the weak girl who had led to his death, let alone cared for the horrible creature she’d been even before that.
"Because... I could see your heart,” Sora assured her with a smile, as he ran a hand through her hair. And Kairi supposed he must have been serious about this… since Sora always took matters of the heart so seriously. It made her feel even more in love, even if she wasn’t sure she deserved it. "…And I was worried that your heart would be bruised or broken. And more than anything else in the world, I wanted to warm it with my own."
Kairi hugged Sora for these words—as how could she not? Especially since she wanted to revel in this feeling a little while longer, if she was going to selflessly give it up… if she couldn’t change—and replied, "That's so sweet, Sora." And it was.
But for some reason, Kairi also couldn't help thinking of their blood pumping organs being pushed together, instead of their figurative hearts that Sora had really been speaking about, "Or, taken literally… really gross." (1)
“Y’know… I was just thinking the same thing,” Sora muttered, seeming suddenly ashamed of himself if the tone in his voice was anything to go by.
And Kairi laughed uproariously, as she pulled away from Sora and smiled at him widely… and then he was grinning at her, too, before he was twirling her around and they were dancing in the midst of their ridiculous life.
And Kairi held onto the moment, in thinking that it could be her last moment with Sora… for so many reasons.
...
In the end… Kairi was selfish. She always had been, and knew this well. Wasn’t this why she’d always wanted Sora to stay home with her, rather than go on his quests? …Or why she’d forced herself into battles she wasn’t ready for—endangering everyone that way—just so she could stay by Sora’s side?
And then… after Sora had died, she’d become the worst possible version of herself. That old popular girl with the bad attitude again, but also someone who’d been grieving for trauma that had happened to her on one, two, three fronts… and she’d been so cold to Riku because of it… someone who was Sora’s best friend.
And after everything they’d been through… maybe she should have just let Sora and herself be together, like they so desperately wanted, but after Sora’s heartfelt declaration the other day—where he’d told her he’d loved her when she’d only been at the first stage of unlovable—she couldn’t help thinking he deserved so much better than her.
But Kairi was too awful to let Sora go completely… So she stopped touching him or being around him if she could help it, without explaining anything, as she tried to become a better (or lesser?) version of herself, so she could hopefully be comfortable in his arms again, sooner rather than later?
Where her enemies were concerned… Kairi stopped talking to them—in not being able to get over just how annoying she was when she spoke—but she also hated that she was doing this… because it reminded her of the girl who hadn’t gotten to speak to her abuser until he was already dead, and she couldn’t get much relief that way, and it was causing the Foretellers to just think she was the simple girlfriend of Sora again, and nothing more.
But if it somehow made Kairi’s heart… truer, she would continue on this path.
So when Ursula's family were making a big deal of her being in love with George from the Jungle, when Kairi was helping out in that world, she said nothing... She also didn't even question why Alice seemed older than she should have been, when she went to Wonderland herself for the first time, and why it seemed different than Sora described it as... She even ignored telling her new friends who she thought framed Roger Rabbit, when she'd figured the answer out herself. And even when it was revealed to her that Master Ava was somehow her grandmother… Kairi didn’t react. But that was more from shock than anything else.
But it was after that had transpired, that Sora seemed to have enough of the silent treatment and began questioning her. "Kairi... I thought you wanted to be more active on our journeys… so why are you being less so now? Are you okay?"
They were back home on Destiny Islands now, after having defeated the Master of Master’s plans and most of the Foretellers, unfortunately. And Kairi had decided to just deal with all of her grief here, and not ruin the party that was going on outside, but she should have known that Sora would never leave her alone when her heart was clearly in distress… that was what she loved about him.
The Kairi of old, who had been pretty good at bottling up her emotions, wouldn't have told Sora the truth here… But the one who remembered how doing such a thing had destroyed Terra, Ventus, and Aqua’s friendship for a while, knew that she had to finally speak.
"...What's wrong is that I'm supposed to be Light, Sora…. But you're kinder and truer than I could ever be… and I’m not saying that to insult you or anything… I just find that no matter what I do, I’m a mean girl—even though I'm trying to fight some of that now… and be less me—so what can you possibly see in me? And what did the universe see, in order to gift me with this power?"
And Kairi assumed that Sora would give her some massive speech here… perhaps something like his “my friends are my power” speech, or when he’d told Riku he didn’t have a conscience… or something along the lines of what he’d said to get her to want to stay in Traverse Town so many years ago…
But instead, Sora just admitted with much simplicity and heart: "Kairi, I love you because you're you... for all the times you've saved me, and how you poke fun at me, and how we've grown up together. How could I not? So stop trying to be anyone other than yourself. And, I mean, Mister Arrogant over here isn't exactly perfect. Our flaws make us good for each other, too, believe it or not."
And Kairi wanted to argue this, she really did. Because how could the hero of the worlds be comparing himself to her?
But if Kairi was being honest with herself, she loved Sora for pretty similar reasons to what he’d just said about her, didn't she? Even when she was put off by how conceited he could be, for example, in thinking he could just magically go to the next school year—despite his grades—just because his teachers loved him so much.
And Kairi held Sora in her arms again… probably something she should’ve been doing every second and every day since he’d first spilled his guts to her, instead of pushing him away, and Kairi asked Sora the question that perhaps the universe had laid on her mind to try and comfort her. "I guess I really do need you to warm my heart, huh?"
And the words "you bet" were whispered against Kairi's head, as Sora kissed her forehead and brought her even closer to him.
Author’s Note: (1) I struggled with whether I wanted to give Kairi this Buffy line or not. On one hand… I didn’t want to, because Sora was spilling his heart out to Kairi here, and it didn’t seem like she would somewhat shoot that in the foot by saying this. But at the same time… I want Kairi to have her personality, tbh… The snarky one that we really saw in KHI and KHII, that allowed her to banter with Sora: as I think that’s one of the reasons they’re good and fun together and have chemistry. So, in the end, I decided to keep it for that reason. And perhaps Kairi later thought of her saying that, and it’s part of the reason she’s hating on herself in this story. -shrugs-
At a Buffy themed event here in ATL. And I could not be more excited 🖤🖤🖤 I fucking love all the Buffy themed outfits, the music, and hopefully the show!
Day 24 kicks into gear with an asskicking (and another broken door). When I saw your prompt, Valde, all I could think of was Valde as Buffy the Vampire Slayer kicking a bunch of ass. Then I remembered you always murder my doors so...here we are >:V
Valde will fight you. Valde will win. Valde will steal your shirts and break your doors. Valde.
