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I swear to fuck if this spinal tap set off a chain reaction that’s allowed my retinas to detach and causes me to go fucking blind I’m gonna lose my goddamn mind I genuinely can’t handle any more bullshit right now literally all I want is to be free of these stupid ass headaches, preserve my hearing, and preserve my sight. Why is everything a fucking obstacle. Why does fixing one part break everything else.

#cafcore #caf has a headache again #cafcorpse #I don’t even have the energy to cry anymore and it’ll probably blind me anyway #if I lose any more sight I’ll lose my degree opportunities too and be in student debt for nothing #at that point I’ll have literally no hope and l’appelle du vide is gonna come hard and fast #FUCK this stupid retina shit is getting in the way of my typing it keeps blocking the screen god whyyy

In preop 😗✌️ let’s get this brain surgery gang

#if I don’t post again within like. the next day or two just assume the Chinese finger trap won lol #cafcore #caf has a headache again #caf didn’t sleep enough #cafcorpse

Holy fuck I’m in so much pain my incision site hurts so bad and idk if it’s hurting the normal recovering amount or if it’s the “you’re gonna wake up in sepsis and should’ve come in yesterday” amount and that shit is right on an artery it feels like someone’s using my blood vessels in a sewing machine

I’m holding off on heading to the er for now bc idk if it’s actually that serious and it’s abt midnight but if I get up tomorrow and feel like I need to go and then have to sit in the waiting room for hours I might just break a glass and let the blood thinners do the rest

#cafcore #caf has a headache again #cafcorpse

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN THERES A BLOOD CLOT IN MY BRAIN AND YOU JUST DIDNT MENTION IT???? IDGAF IF IT STARTED RECANALIZING ITSELF THEM SHITS ARE FUCKING DEADLY BRO

#found out yesterday during a routine neuro appt that my neurosurgeon just. felt like not telling me this during my follow up #Fym ‘signs of prior thrombosis’ bro????#Ik I keep asking if I’m cooked but atp I’m fuckin sautéed broiled fried steamed grilled panfried boiled sautéed again and burnt #caf has a headache again #tw blood mention #does this count as a blood mention? ig technically by definition #cafcorpse

@ my pharmacy PLEASE GIVE ME MY MEDS IM SORRY DOR WHATEVER I DID I JUST WANT THIS HEADACHE TO GO AWAY PLEASE PUT ME BACK ON MY ANTI HEADACHE PILLS I PROMISE ILL VE GOOD

#cafcore #caf has a headache again #I am undermedicated and overwhelmed #cafcorpse

I’m getting my back hole-punched again in 3 weeks 🎉 hopefully this time they don’t fuck it up and leave me bedridden for the next week and with more debilitating chronic pain to deal with 🤧

#cafcore #cafcorpse #being disabled is really fuckin exhausting man #partially bc my dr is determined to keep further disabling me😫#caf has a headache again

Just learned I actually did have a stroke back when this shit started with my head and still, my fuckass Dr didn’t take 3 milliseconds to explain that fact to me lmao, how tf am I supposed to advocate for my health and be an active participant in making the best decisions for my wellbeing if you mfs won’t tell me how well I’m being?? I was right talking to my therapist earlier tbh like I should spin a wheel and pick one of these dicks to sue that day

#cafcore #caf has a headache again #cafcorpse #fr tho how do you miss a stroke in one of the largest veins in the only region you’re scanning dawg #not once but TWICE BRO #fuck me ig

Istg if this bitch comes in here and is immediately loud as fuck stomping around slamming doors and howling laughing and shit at midnight while she knows I’m back here trying to sleep through a migraine I might actually lose my mind and beat the hell out of her. It’s not like my migraine is a secret either, bc ik she checks the weather regularly so she knows that when the air pressure is this high I’m royally and biblically fucked. I’m just so tired and in so much pain I can’t even muster the energy to ask her to pls just chill tf out for one night

#cafcore #caf has a headache again #caf didn’t sleep enough #cafcorpse #tw rant

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