#caljune

[girlknightblues]

Unwanted: Cast List - Audio Reading

[dgknightblue]

I’ve had a psychological horror sabolaw dream and I don’t know how to write it. I will try, but the gender fxckery is a sensitive subject.

It feels a little misogynistic. But maybe that would add to the growing fear? I don’t know.

I’m a girl but…. I don’t know. It’s a horror story (not a nightmare for me but it felt terrifying.)

The dysphoria unsettles Law when he wakes up, so he has to constantly check to make sure he is a guy.

The misogyny part is when in these dreams, Law is a girl (He can’t question why- that’s just who she is in these dreams, a girl), the only thing she wants is to get pregnant specifically by a blond man she knows but doesn’t know. He doesn’t know the man in the dreams, but she does.

Like I don’t know why I’m cooking up horror when I can’t write horror. It’s unfair, but oh well.

I’ll try to write some of it, but I’ll probably edit out Law’s need to be pregnant even if it’s a plot point.

Like I recognize it’s a horror story I dreamt up but it’s not a nightmare. Not the first time it’s happened.

Personally wasn’t scared, but the characters were.

I will never stop mourning the horror fae story I had for another fandom with my OPT. I can’t write, when I tried to get the basics out it turned into some sort of romance? Probably toxic romance but still romance.

Neither of these are romance- they are horror! HORROR!!!

WHY CANT I WRITE PROPER HORROR?

Currently, I have one toxic love story for another fandom and I’m trying something else with the other otp fandom.

(Toxic love story: ‘Love Hurts’ It’s Trolls, Creek x Branch)

The other story, they aren’t in love but they need each other. I don’t know, it’ll probably end up another fxcking romance story in the end.

(It’s called Intimate and Familiar! It’s homestuck, Caliborn x June)

I’m a terrible writer.

Love isn’t always happy and love can fade. I want to mix horror into for some reason. Love can be terrifying and can be a horror story without jealous exes or lovers killing the people around them.

For this Sabolaw… is it really just in his head? Why is he dreaming of the same blond man? Why can’t he tell what’s real anymore?

Law seeks help from his friends and they take him seriously. They asks if he wants to be a girl and he’s firm. No, that doesn’t feel right. And they say ‘this is bad, you should only be yourself and for yourself- not for anyone else.’

Anyways, the context of the dreams are:

A nobleman with blond hair lives his personal physician. But it’s just the two of them. There are no maids or butlers- no chefs to cook for them yet food is always ready at the table. The house doesn’t change size and it all feels real. Like he is a woman in love with this man that reciprocates the advances.

The only change is the baby room. It’s not there when he’s awake. It always there when he’s dreaming.

It’s fully decorated, but the man isn’t married or have a child. It was when he put a ring on her finger in the very first dream that one appeared in the second dream.

That’s all. I will try to write some of this, but I doubt it’ll be the way I dreamed it. After all I’m never writing the fae story for the other fandom otp. I know it’ll end up being some love story like all my other stories.

Well maybe far down the future I’ll write it. It didn’t start out as a horror fae dream, but a deal between June and Caliborn. It was the realization that I could make them both different types of fae that it turned into something darker. I had this basic idea that spiraled.

Sorry if this was long, but if you read the whole thing, thanks! I appreciate you for listening to my rambling- I don’t know how to stop.

Edit:

I HAD A REALIZATION THAT WOULD MAKE THE GENDER FXCKERY HORROR!!!!

Granted it involves murder, STILL!!!

I can write it!!!!

[dragongirldg]

Aye aye captain!

[decadentperfectionbird]

Juneborn is both a blessed and cursed ship. Just like the embodiment of "women accidentally reforming evil men by not putting up with thier bullshit"

[girlknightblues]

:3333

[girlknightblues]

Actor June at work and then magic (old comic)

[girlknightblues]

The first fic I read in ao3 was a homestuck wings fic with johnkat. I didn’t notice it could be read chapter by chapter and was confused why it kept going. It had these really good pictures to go with it.

JohnKat wasn’t a ship I cared about. A lot of ships didn’t take my interest, just read them because John was the main character or a main character.

For some unknown reason I thought caliborn x John had the chemistry to pull me in. I shipped it as a joke but my own conceived notion of how they are got to me.

That’s my ship now and I am inconsolable.

June was another layer to this shxt pie.

Basically, I’m fxcked.

[girlknightblues]

Someone, a long time ago on my main blog, made a complilation video of some of my CalJohn/ caljune art I made and I wanted to reblog it but I don’t know where it is :(