Summary: “I wish that I was what you wanted me to be.” Loki x Reader
A/N: Apologies! I shouldn’t have left this last part take so long to write but I honestly didn’t know how this should end. Even now, I don’t know if I made the right choice. I’m hoping to be better for the future works I have planned but we shall see.
Hela-Avenger Masterlist
Open up your heart, open up your heart
Open up your heart, open up your heart
Open up your heart, open up your heart
The room slowly grows empty at Loki’s sudden recovery. At the sight of his conscious brother, Thor’s eagerness almost sent Loki back a few more days of recovery. His pained groans from Thor’s embrace caused Thor to let go and quickly allowed Loki the needed reprieve to get checked by the doctors. It wasn’t until they were done and gave him the clear, that you allowed yourself to face him.
Loki’s eyes widen in surprise at the sight of you entering his room. You wondered if it was possible that he was afraid of you now but you knew that he would have said something by now if that were the case.
“Hi,” you whisper as you remain by the door.
“Hi,” he greets back.
“I uh… The doctors said you should rest so maybe I should come back later…”
You don’t get too far as Loki calls out your name stopping you from running away.
“Stay,” he pleads. “I won’t be able to truly rest… There’s just much to say.”
You hesitantly step back into the room and slowly make your way towards the chair next to his bed. You take your seat in it again and look down at your bruised hands. You weren’t strong enough to look him in the eye now that he was awake.
“I’m sorry.”
Your head snaps up at the words that he managed to say before you did. You scowled at the apology unsure of what he could be apologizing for.
“Loki…”
“No, allow me to finish,” Loki states. “I didn’t get to before so please...”
He swallows nervously and you can’t help but follow the bruises that trailed down his skin. You felt ill again.
“I am sorry…” he apologizes. “I am sorry for all I’ve done to you. The moment we met, we fought… I knew you were unlike the others. I saw a light in you, a flame, and it grew brighter and stronger with each passing day. Your ambition, your dreams... I was attracted to it. I am a creature of ice but the warmth of your entire being was intoxicating and all I wanted was to remain by your side always.”
“But you see, Ice and Fire don’t mix well and I began to melt in your presence,” he states. “You were waking me up from this long tormented dream and I was afraid. I was afraid of the reality I would soon have to face. I wanted to bring you with me but you always knew better than I so I had to leave. I had to make myself leave. We fought again… and I hurt you so badly. I could see it. I broke you. It was the last thing I wanted to do but I hoped that would be enough for you to break away from me and return to what you were meant to be; a hero.”
Loki’s gaze falls on you and you can’t hold it back any longer. Your chest tightens as the tears start to flow down your cheeks. You quickly cover your face unable to look at him any longer. The pain in his eyes reflecting your own.
“And yet it seems I never broke you,” Loki sighs out. “I merely took. I took your love. I took your flame. It even seems, I’ve taken your title. I am but a mere thief.”
The tears turn dry but your chest remains heavy.
“I am truly sorry, Y/N,” he whispers. “So sorry for taking everything from you.”
You don’t know how to respond. Everything he’s said was still swirling in your mind yet there was still one thing he never apologized for and the question you’ve always had remained unanswered.
“Did you ever love me?” you ask.
Loki hesitates at the question and by the jerk of his sudden movement he hisses in pain.
“I don’t want to hurt you more than I already have.”
You can’t help but let out a sigh and look away from him. You stand up from your seat and move away from him.
“Leaving things unsaid is the reason we’re where we are at the moment,” you answer as you peak at the cuts on his face and bruising around his neck. “Bruised and in pain.”
Loki’s eyes flicker to the cuts and bruising around your hands. He doesn’t respond instantly instead he takes his time to pick his words.
“If you’re afraid of me causing you harm, I can promise you that I won’t…”
Loki actually laughs at your comment. The glimmer of amusement in his eyes makes him more lively. He seems to slowly be returning back to normal.
“I… I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“The truth,” I answer easily. “We’ve been honest with each other so far so let’s keep that going.”
Loki sighs and you can’t help but wonder why he’s dragging this on.
“I never… I never felt so at peace until I came across you and your humble abode,” Loki answers. “Though our time together was short I… Y/N... “
He hesitates once more and you are getting tired of waiting.
“You what, Loki?” you ask. “It is a simple question. Yes or no? I…”
“There was a reason I left you!” Loki exclaims grimacing at his proclamation and reaching for his ribs. “I… I had to keep you safe. Isn’t that enough for you? Can that…”
“No, it’s not,” you answer. “I have been waiting for so long to know the answer to that question and saying you left to save me isn’t what I asked. So why are you dragging this on? End this madness now.”
Loki remains silent and looks away from your stare. His focus has shifted to the ceiling as he takes a deep breath.
“I did and still do… love you.”
The answer is more than you bargained for and you can’t help but stare at him in confusion.
How could that be possible? And why hadn’t he said something before?
“But I hurt you,” you whisper. “I hurt you so badly and I… I pushed you away. I was the one who… why didn’t you say something before…I...”
“You were so angry with me. I didn’t realize how angry apparently,” he chuckles as he looks down at his wounds. “But I couldn’t say those words knowing it would just… harm you. I’ve already taken so much from you. There was no need for me to take away the peace you received at telling me off.”
You can’t help but pace once more unable to process the range of emotions going through you at the moment. Part of you grew angry while the other was settling in relief. There was a war growing inside you and you had no idea what side would win. You start to feel yourself teeter to one side but it all comes to a stop as Loki speaks again.
“Do you… Is there a way you may once love me again?”
The war inside you silences as you find the answer to his question with ease.
“I… I have never stopped loving you, it seems,” you whisper. “I fear that I can never stop loving you even after all of this…”
You can’t help the sad laugh that escapes your lips.
“I can’t accept your apology, Loki.”
A flash of sadness crosses Loki’s face before he hides it under a still mask.
“I can’t accept it until you accept mine first,” you continue seeing the tension in his body become released. “I am so sorry, Loki. I… I was just so angry.”
“I know and I deserved it so…”
“No, no you didn’t,” you interrupt him. “I… I should know better than to put the blame on someone else. It was just easier to blame you. Especially since I thought I would never see you again but that anger… that anger should have really been directed to myself. I should have been stronger. I should have known better. I should have allowed myself to heal a long time ago but I didn’t. I held onto that anger for reasons unknown. Maybe because it was the only thing I had left from you.”
Loki takes in your words and it seems that you have reached a standstill. Everything you had to say was already said. There was nothing else holding you back and you felt free. The tight weight that had settled on your chest was gone.
“I forgive you,” Loki states. “Which then means that…”
“I forgive you too,” you finish.
You both stare at each other waiting to see what the next step should be. The thing is you don’t know what’s meant to happen beyond this point.
You take a seat at the edge of his bed. You can feel the slight warmth of his body. Your hand reaches for a loose strand of his hair and brushes it back behind his ear. Loki smiles at the simple, gentle act.
The answer comes to you then and you find yourself content with it. You slowly place a soft kiss on his lips before having to pull away.
“We need time to heal,” you whisper to him. “From old wounds and new. We just need time.”
Loki nods silently understanding where you’re coming from.
“When I can’t see the cuts and bruises from my hands or the cuts and bruises on your face… we can talk again. See where things are and where we can go from there.”
“I heal quickly,” Loki comments earning a smile from you.
“But I heal slow,” you answer dimming the mood. “Very slow.”
Loki reaches for your chin and tilts your head up so he can look at you again.
“Then I will patiently wait for your slow recovery,” he promises. “I will happily wait for you.”
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Qrow was trying to do his best to sober up for Ruby and Yang, be a good ally to James, and support the battle against Salem however he could. Clover Ebi was going to help him every step of the way, whether Qrow wanted his help or not.
–aka Clover’s quest to win over Qrow Branwen in V7. Updates daily.
Black cameo with ivory 3D skull in aged 'gold' setting. Can be worn as choker or pin.
2.5" high x 1.5" wide, 13" long black velvet choker that adjusts up to 21" length.
"A cameo is a small scene or figure carved in relief. This modern Italian word, meaning "to engrave", is thought to have come from the ancient Arabic word "khamea", meaning "amulet". Folklore relates cameos' mystic capacity to attract health and good fortune. The enduring popularity of the cameo attests to its delicate power to beguile generations of wearers and viewers alike."
