A Sweet Tale
Our numbers are dwindling rapidly. The last swipe decimated half our ranks. Curse the Hitachi triplets and their racially insensitive Native American costumes! I know my time is coming soon. I was made to die. Gumballs, we all are. Don’t know why I thought maybe I’d be different. Besides, maybe this is the more humane way to go. My Uncle Kit was left in a hot car. I hear the results were garishly…sticky. And there was my Cousin Hershey. Poor sweetie fell out of a kid’s bag and was ran over by a car, then carried off by a dog. Almost took the dog down with her. Always was a fighter that one. And there was my Great Aunt Ree---Oh no! It’s Alice Dunfee!!! Everyone knows she has a soft spot for Dum Dums likes me! Barbaric child, she’s a chewer! Why can no one just lick us?! NO No no nononononono! NO! Don’t pick ME!!!! Liquorish, does she have a tight grip. Release me you sweaty-palmed-wanna-be-princess! W-W-Wait, why is she unwrapping me now?!?! ALICE, you’re supposed to let your mom check me for poison!!! FOR ALL YOU KNOW I COULD BE DEADL-*CRUNCH!*
