#cfaut

[fratboykate]

In other news... the talented @micserenity has started to draw some fucking amazing art for CFAU. There's more seemingly coming down the line and I'm beyond speechless.

LOOK AT RORO AND COS! LOOK AT THEM. LOOK AT THE CHILDREN.

[fratboykate]

My theory? Every emotional loss for Lexa is like the day she lost her mother. I mean it varies by how close they were, but she only had one method of coping and it was the one Anya gave her that day. To withdraw into a cave that used to be real, and now lives in her mind, and don't tell anyone what's happened. (For me) Most of what therapy and Gustav gave Lexa wasn't a way to get over her grief, but a way to come back out of the cave.

Holy shit, I love this so much.

[fratboykate]

I always love that CFAU isn’t ‘terrible things happen to a perfect family, and how they get perfect again’. I mean, they LOOK perfect when we first meet them, but all the fracture points are already there. Lexa/Willa was always damaged in exactly the way that nearly wreaked her, so was Clarke (who SEEMS like the ‘good parent’ but who gave Lexa so much leeway with her breakdown that the kids were hurt - which wasn’t WRONG since Lexa was ill, but wasn’t RIGHT either. It was just human.) 1/2

I mean, I know what those other stories are saying, but personally I like the idea that you can be screwed up to start with and still be happy. That everything about your life can be wreaked and it might even be partially your fault...but you can get a second chance. And that happy ENOUGH is ok and functional, you don’t have to overcome everything, just live with it. So, brain fart over. You might even not agree with me :) 2/2

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Not a brain fart at all, I do agree with you. What you pointed out is the very essence of the story. This was never a perfect family or a perfect relationship. There were some major flaws that they had both sort of learned to dance around over the years, particularly with Wila. She should’ve been in therapy at age 0 lol. There’s also shit Parker should’ve nipped in the bud years before. This chapter is a good example of that.

Wila was never a bad mom or wife, she was an incredible mother who loved her children and wife more than she loved herself...but her priorities were FUCKED quite often. Those two truths can coexist. Clarke kept giving her a pass on all the ways she dropped the ball because she knew there was a reason why Lexa did shit but that forgiveness and understanding always came at the expense of her taking the brunt of the parenting upon herself.

Truly, all Jake’s death did was put a magnifying glass on all the issues they’d been carrying around almost from the beginning. It didn’t create any problems per se, it only exacerbated all of it to the point where they became too big to ignore. Add loss and grief to the mix and you have the perfect storm.

[fratboykate]

Did Lexa have an accent? Did Clarke make fun of her for it? What's the most country girl thing about Lexa?

Lol, yeah that little redneck did have an accent when she moved to NYC. It was just another thing the kids made fun of her for. She also thought it sounded dumb and she wanted to be a big bad lawyer so she worked really hard to get rid of it. But it’s still there...it’s like her most basic instinct so when she’s really down to her Monkey Brain shit it comes out. For example, if they’re REALLY arguing or she’s super emotional about something the accent or at the very least the southern drawl will start to leak and Clarke will 10/10 catch it and bring it up. It happened when they were having sex sometimes and Clarke pointing it out would ruin the mood nearly every time.

“It was cute!”

“Right.”

“Oh come on, you know I love it when you go all Forest Gump on me.”

“I’m going to sleep.”

KJDGJSKDFGHSDJKGHD She’s such a cranky old man. I hate her.

Also, Anya definitely had an accent so when they spent a lot of time together it would start to rub off on Lexa sometimes.

[fratboykate]

35 Husbands Share Hilarious Pictures Of Their Pregnant Wife Problems

Pregnancy is a trying time. If you’re the one carrying a baby, you have to contend with a lot. From morning sickness to cravings, and that’s

I stumbled upon this on Facebook and I'm losing it because each one is more CFAU!Clexa than the one before and I basically have 35 new prompts written in my head.

Poor Lexa, she really has no idea what she was getting herself into when she asked for kids 😂😂😂

[fratboykate]

BITCH, I FUCKING WEEPED

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Hear me out, if you don’t think Aden would do this with Clarke you’re mistaken. Parker is having a hard time getting over Lexa being gone so he decides that they need to do things that not only distract her but also get her out of the apartment. He sits down with her and he’s like “Make a list of all the things you and mom never got to do and that you wish you did.” and Parker is all like “We did all that we set out to do. We had you guys and a good life. Nothing else I could’ve asked for.” but he won’t take no for an answer. He’s not budging on this so despite the fact that it takes a few days to get something out of her, they end up making a list and Aden sets out to make sure every point on that list is checked off.

Here’s the thing, Nana is responsible but she’s also very pragmatic, she’s very much like Lexa in that sense. Aden on the other hand, he’s incredibly emotion drivenl. Where Anya is the head, he’s the heart. Grief is never a competition but if you had to somehow quantify who suffered the most out of the kids with Lexa dying it would definitely be him. Costia suffered in her own way and it was definitely fucking hard, there’s no way around that, but Aden was a hair above everyone else. It had a lot to do with the fact that not only did he feel like he had less time with her because he was the last one to come along but also because he was the first one she forgot. He felt cheated out of so much time with his mom and that made him angry. He was definitely stuck in the anger age for a long time and that put a strain on his relationship. As much as this was about helping Parker it was also about helping himself get out of the rut he fell into or his life was going to fall apart. He knew Lexa almost lost everything because she let grief consume her and he realized that if only just for her, he couldn’t make the same mistake again. He was committed to getting through it and that was the reason he was the driving force behind The List.

Obviously Nana, Roa, Jamie, and the kids jumped on board as soon as they heard of the idea but this is pretty much Aden’s initiative. As a result, getting through the list ends up becoming a family thing where they all tag along to each thing and experience it together. The memories of those days are something to hold on to once Clarke is gone. They find solace in knowing they could still sometimes still see a bit of her they hadn’t seen since Wila got sick. It helped to know they gave her a good few years, at least as much as she could’ve had, without the love of her life by her side.

[fratboykate]

Who was better at doing the girls hair? Cfau

They were actually both pretty good, they’ve both been dealing with their own hair their entire lives so doing the girl’s hair was never an issue. Lexa definitely went a bit more intricate sometimes tho. She loved braids and she’d been braiding her messy ass curly hair her entire life so she learned how to get creative with it. Whenever she actually had the time to sit down with them she would do some gorgeous braids on them. Clarke was always thinking that it was so lowkey sexy...then again she doesn’t really need an excuse to get turned on :p

If anything Jake’s hair was the issue tho lol. The girls and Aden all took mostly after Clarke so their hair was straighter even though Anya’s had a hint of curls like Wila’s but Jake had FULL ON curly mane status. He had the same hair as Wila and he hated it so Lexa was the one generally helping him with it.

He was like:

He hated it. Wila mostly straightened her hair so he fucking loathed the curls because she didn’t have them so he didn’t want them either but like...who’s going to go through the trouble of straightening an 8 year old’s hair every morning? We see a bit of this on the chapter that ends right at the shooting (I don’t remember the number and I’m too lazy to go look lol). It was the morning that Lexa left without saying goodbye to him so when Clarke walks in he’s trying to brush his hair down and obviously that’s just making it worse. Lexa was usually the one who could talk him into not hating the curls every morning and helping him style it in a way he sort of wasn’t totally grumpy about it. It’s part of the reason they mostly kept his hair medium length or shorter because he was just...not having it when his hair was longer.

[fratboykate]

What was the each of the kids favorite thing about their moms and what was Clarke and Lexa's favorite thing of each kid?

This got LONG and I’m going to put it under the cut for the desktop users but sorry mobile users :D It’s not my fault that I can talk about my children all day long.

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I wasn't sure if you wanted like overall what the kids liked about their moms or what each of them individually likes but I guess I'll go for both.

OVERALL:

They always felt SO LOVED and I think ultimately that really is what got them through the bad years. At least Nana and Roa.

With Lexa, sure, she works a lot and yeah, Clarke has to pick up the slack quite often but when Lexa is there she always, always, gives them her full attention. Whether it be during the dinner recap sessions or going the extra mile to get really involved in their hobbies or stuff like sitting down and making up games so that Roa can get through her homework...Lexa always finds a way to build personalized bonds with each of them. She comes home beat but instead of just being "Ok cool, bed time" she goes out of her way to make nights the moment she can fully dedicate to each of them in their own individual way and that is specifically tailored to their needs. This matters a lot, particularly when they start to grow into their late teens/adulthood they can look back and appreciate the importance of each of those nights. We all know Lexa is a neurotic lunatic but there is a reason they all love her just a millimeter more than Clarke. There has always been something about Lexa that makes it so. You can see the whole thing replicated with the grand babies.

We know Clarke is more of the provider, and I don't mean that only in the monetary sense. Clarke jokes all the time that Lexa is like a fifth kid. Lexa is the one who will come home covered in dirt because they were running around and had ice cream on a Thursday at 3pm and Clarke is the one wiping their faces (Lexa included) and making them wash their hands before they sit down for lunch. For as strict as she can be, Lexa is the sword fight mom and Clarke is the "WHERE ARE MY SOCKS?!" mom. They both serve very distinct functions as parents but we also know they switch quite often in their roles depending on what the situation is. The kids know Lexa is the one who will sneak them a cookie before dinner/will spend $600 on a loop pedal for no other reason beyond "well...she wanted it" but Clarke is the one that will pretend she doesn't know their boyfriend is sneaking in at night/won't kill them if they have a beer at 16.

Point is, the kids knew they were adored and that their needs would always be covered. This is obviously beyond financially - which we know is a given - but, more important, in every other way that mattered.

INDIVIDUALLY:

-COSTIA:

Her favorite thing about Lexa was probably how mighty and invincible she felt and came across. Lexa was larger than life to Costia, she was the reason Cos though she could do anything. They say the bigger you are the harder you fall and that is exactly why when everything went down and Lexa turns out to be anything but those things (and in many ways the exact opposite) it was so absolutely fucking devastating to Costia. It’s why it stung that much. Her hero crumbled in front of her in all the worst ways. At her age and in the circumstances they found themselves in it was a devastatingly tough blow.

Lexa was definitely Costia’s favorite. No doubt about that, especially because during those first years Clarke was the disciplinarian and Lexa was the “yes” woman. As Costia was reaching that teen bitch thing we know she did so well most of her friction was with Clarke. The flip in that relationship was triggered by the loss and it’s super interesting because where Lexa was once her safety net that all changes and it becomes Clarke’s role almost immediately. At the same time we know there was a lot of resentment from Costia towards Clarke because of what she feels are the free passes Lexa got. After those two years I don’t know that Costia had a favorite thing about either of them but, overall, something she can and has always appreciated about Clarke was how reliable she was. Clarke was perfectly fine taking a back seat to Lexa with the kids when Lexa was around but if Lexa dropped the ball Clarke was right there to catch it before it hit the ground.

-ANYA:

In general, Nana’s favorite thing about both Clarke and Lexa is that she connected in a very cerebral with each of them. She could have a six hour conversation with Lexa about Neruda or Sartre one day and then go into Delauney's use of color with Clarke while helping with dinner the next day. Despite her dyscalculia, Anya was the most "traditionally smart" out of all the kids and she could tap into both sides of her brilliant little brain with each of her moms. More specifically Anya really valued that Lexa respected her independence and didn't push her into anything. Lexa saw a lot of herself in Anya and she knew that more often than not Nana just needed to be left alone and that she would take care of what needed to be taken care of. Nana was the kid you only had to say something once and you could be sure it would be done. Anya felt validated by Lexa because they understood each other in a way Clarke would never get because of how completely different their personalities were. Anya grew out of her more Lexa-ish ways and a lot of it had to do with those two years and the mothering role she had to step into and that’s when she connected with Clarke more. The rough times brought all of the kids closer to Clarke to be honest, and not just because Lexa checked out but because they really understood that she was there. The confirmed that she was an unmovable rock despite the storm going on around them.

-JAKE

He was just…I don’t think that I need to explain what Lexa and Jake were to each other. We know. That kid lived and breathed through and for Lexa. It was such an incredible bond that I think about it and my chest constricts a little.

Is it mean to say that Clarke was just…mom? I think his relationship with Clarke was similar to Costia’s but to the extreme. Jake obviously loved her because he was a sensitive little mess in the same way Lexa is but Lexa was his everything. She was the person he relied and counted on every second of the day. The level of dependence was such that a lot of the times Clarke didn’t even register for him. If he was sick he would only want Lexa there, if he got hurt he would only let Lexa touch the scrape, we know that when he had nightmares Lexa was the go-to. Yes, he loved Clarke but Lexa overshadowed her in every way. Was it healthy? Probably not, but it’s just how he was.

-ROA:

Oh baby Roa. She’s such a special kid. My little weirdo. Very much like Lexa’s letter to her says, Lexa never stopped feeding that quirky side of her. Lexa is her champion in every fucking way. Lexa has conversations with her imaginary friends, Lexa watches The Lion King a million times in a row if she asks and not groan like everyone else does, Lexa is there hooting louder than everyone at every swim meet, Lexa sits with her at the table and helps her with her college homework because Roa is having a hard time. Lexa takes the time to nurture the things people make fun of her for. Ro is also the one that came out mostly unscathed of the whole mess because she was so small that while she understood their life had changed and bad things were happening she was too young to properly wrap her head around it and by the time she could’ve really grasped it Lexa was already back. Lexa never, not once, stopped being “mom” to her. She never really understood the absence and because of that their relationship was the purest one out of the older three. It wasn’t tainted by anything. She loves and adores Lexa for all the ways in which she is an outstanding mother and that never had a reason to falter.

Out of all of them, Roa is the one who would probably pick Clarke over Lexa if it REALLY came down to it. Lexa is funny in a weird way but Clarke’s humor is her favorite. Clarke can always make her laugh with very little effort. Roa really loves that about Clarke.

-ADEN:

Chunkball baby Aden…He loves them both equally but he worries most about Lexa which is why he is more doting with her. You don’t need any further example of this than to see how he is with her in Chapter 32. A chef’s life is HARD and they work long ass hours but every day, every damn fucking day, Aden makes it home for however amount of time he can spare. Aden understood pretty early on what his role in the family was and how he fits in the puzzle. He knows why his moms sort of hover with metaphorical bubble wrap around him. He never misses that second of sheer panic in their eyes whenever he gets hurt or comes close to being hurt. It doesn’t matter how small the scrape on the knee is, he can sense the fear emanating from Clarke and Lexa. It’s why in some weird way he becomes their protector, he has to make sure they don’t worry about him so he ends up being their very loving keeper instead. He is totally a momma’s boy with both of them and he has never been embarrassed to admit it.