Toda manhã, na pedra da parede blocada oitentista do vizinho, desabrocham as flores desta muda de damiana. Tem uns três anos isso. Também conhecida como xanana, a planta é, oficialmente, simbolo da cidade de Natal desde 2002. Primeira vez que essa relação foi feita aconteceu na poesia de Diógenes da Cunha Lima que associou a planta teimosa (que dá em qualquer sol e qualquer brecha de condição) à resistência do povo potiguar que, segundo ele, também é assim, de aguentar as coisas no meio da adversidade. Pra mim, é só uma flor que não guenta ver claridade sem acordar pra curiar o que tá acontecendo na rua, tal qual minha vó, minhas tias, minha mãe. Apesar de assim, pendurada e do lado de fora, também considero como planta do meu jardim. #jardim #arte #paisagismo #quintal #fotografia #camera #instaphoto #verde #casa #plantas #xanana #damiana #chanana #plant #instaartist #paz #sabedoria #calmingvibes #peacefulmoments #sossego #cafezinho #jardimdobalduino #manhã #morningmood #sol #sunnymood #sun (em Alecrim) https://www.instagram.com/p/COnXiDOBthb/?igshid=xsvn5aaxt4ng
Preamble: You’ve been going to the same coffee shop for the past four years. You’ve ordered the same thing almost every single day, and you never, ever skip on that part of your morning. So, when Mrs. Park hired a new barista and the once serene café was suddenly flooded with people every second of the day, you were less than thrilled.
You stared at the scene before you. Junseok was sweaty and tired, panting heavily. Chan was holding a half-brewed cup of coffee, seemingly moving closer to you. Seoyeon was leaning low with a deep v-neck shirt toward Chan, but turned to Junseok with disgust when she saw his ragged state. You sat in your chair, gingerly fiddling with the handle of your mug, not completely sure what to do next.
“Are you alright?” Chan asked Junseok. The messy boy stood up straight and brushed himself off. He walked toward you and smiled.
“Could I speak to you for a moment?” He asked. You looked up at Chan, who seemed just as confused as you, then looked back at Junseok.
“Okay.”
He led you to the exit of the café, holding the door open. You hesitantly walked through as he followed suit. You noticed that his hands were shaky and his gaze seemed to be avoiding yours.
“I got your text,” He said. “and I’m here to tell you that I feel the same.” He looked at you with a shy smile, which was returned with a confused raise of your brow.
“What do you mean?” You asked. He smiled and grabbed your hands.
“You sent me a text about how you feel about me.” He said, smiling. His grin slowly dissipated when he noticed that you weren’t aware of what was happening. “What’s wrong? Why do you look so confused?” He asked.
“Why are you confusing me?” You retorted. “I still haven’t seen my phone since the party.” You explained. Junseok’s eyes widened as he released your hands.
“I-” He fumbled. “I’m so sorry. I got a text from your number saying that you wanted to be more than friends.” He explained. “Which you apparently didn’t send. I feel like such an idiot. Oh my gosh, I just-” He stuttered. “I can’t believe I just told you that. Oh no.” He ran his fingers through his hair and turned away from you.
“It’s okay, it’s not your fault.” You said. You then realized why he was so bent out of shape. “Oh. OH.” You suddenly were reanimated, moving around nervously.
“Do you like me?” Junseok had turned to look at you, his eyes sincere and his mouth turned into a worried frown.
“I-” You began. “I am interested in someone else; I’m sorry.” You said. He looked down, tears brimming his eyes. After a moment, he raised his head, smiling.
“It’s Chan, right?” He asked. “I thought you seemed close during the party.” He was quiet for a bit until you broke the silence.
“Are we still friends?” You asked him, hopeful. Though you may not feel an attraction to him, you had enjoyed his company. He truly was a great guy.
“Of course. I’ll see you at the university.” He said, twiddling his thumbs. He looked at you sheepishly, running a hand through his hair again. “Bye, Y/n.”
You looked at him with concern. “Okay, see you.”
He waved as he walked down the sidewalk. Part of you felt absolutely horrible for hurting him. You looked back and forth between the empty space Junseok once stood and the café’s entrance. You slowly made your way back inside, sitting down quietly.
“Y/n?” Chan said. You looked up at him and smiled. “What was that all about?” He asked. You contemplated telling him the details, but decided against it.
“Junseok got a text from my number.” You said. “I didn’t send it.”
“Your phone is still missing.” Chan said. He stared off in thought. “Someone must be sending texts in your name.” He paused. “How did they get through your passcode?” He asked. You looked at him and blinked.
“I didn’t have one set.” You explained.
“Of all of the irresponsible-” Chan started on a tangent, spinning around in annoyance. “Are you kidding me?” He asked. “Setting up the security is step one!”
After a few more minutes of scolding you as he worked, Chan fell silent. You attempted to take a sip of your coffee, but it had become cold a long while ago. Your expression soured at the room temperature latte, causing Chan’s face to light up as he laughed at your reaction.
“That was gold. Wow. I should just serve you cold lattes.” He paused. “Because I’m cold hearted.” He paused again, waiting for you to laugh. “Get it?”
“Oh, I got it. It just wasn’t very good.” You retorted. He laughed through the pain, getting back to work. You giggled at the interaction before deciding it was a good time for you to leave. You needed to at least attempt to shut down your phone.
After gathering your things and saying your goodbyes, you made your way back to the subway station, wiping a bead of sweat from your forehead. You needed to get to your data provider to turn off the service to your number until you got your phone back.
When you entered the store a clerk immediately tried to talk you into buying a new phone, rather than finding your old one, at which you rolled your eyes and insisted on trying to search for your phone instead. Once that was taken care of, you decided you’d turn in for the day and chill at home. You spent most of the time reading books and watching your favourite television shows. Still, you felt that deep hollowness in your stomach. Why would someone tell Junseok that you had feelings for him?
Sighing for the umpteenth time, you turned off the television, closed your book, and washed up for bed. You tried to get some sleep, but you didn’t really have good results.
After an entire night of tossing and turning in your bed, you showered, styling your hair for the next day. There were dark bags under your eyes and your skin was dull with fatigue. Huffing, you gathered your things and walked out of the front door, locking it behind you. The first few classes at the university weren’t very eventful. You heard your professor drone on about the Korean language and how intricately it can be spun into wondrous stories with hidden meanings. You quite enjoyed that lecture. Comparatively speaking, that is.
You dragged yourself to your last class of the day, running a hand through your now messy hair. You heard someone call your name from behind.
“Y/n, hey.” It was Junseok. He still seemed a bit nervous after your last conversation. Being perfectly honest, you were, too. His hands were stuffed precariously in his pockets as he glanced at you. “It’s good to see you.” He said. You shot him a smile.
“Likewise. Is this your last class?” You asked him. He nodded, but said nothing. “Mine, too.”
After that somewhat clumsy conversation, you two parted ways and took your seats. The last lesson bored you half to death, but you made it through without taking a nap - at least not too long. Oops.
It was now time for you to make your way to the café. You didn’t have nearly as many textbooks on hand today, which helped a bit with the walk you had to take. For the most part, the café was still quiet. You checked your watch, realizing that the majority of the high school students weren’t yet out for the day. With that, you smiled to yourself.
“Hello, beautiful.” You heard Chan greet you as soon as you walked in the door, earning him a shy smile.
“Hi.” You said. He laughed at your demeanor.
“How’re you feeling?” He asked. You shrugged.
“Not bad. Lectures aren’t the greatest thing in the world, but that’s not unusual. What about you?” You said. “Is Seoyeon still stalking you?” Chan openly laughed at your choice of words.
“I haven’t seen her in person today, but through social media, yes. She must not have any responsibility to be able to be online as much as she is.” He muttered. He looked considerably better today than he did yesterday, but you could still find signs of fatigue. “Can I ask you a question?” Chan asked. You perked up and nodded.
“Yeah, of course.” You said. Chan looked down a bit, a sweet smile gracing his face. His dimples puckered his cheeks and it made your heart flutter.
“Can I take you on that date?” He asked. You blinked in confusion. Suddenly, the realization hit you.
“Oh lord. I completely forgot with everything that was going on yesterday! I’m so sorry!” You exclaimed. You thought back to the plans Chan had made with you to go to his favourite coffee house, smiling.
“Yeah, I know. I just thought you had enough on your plate.” He said. “Honestly, I wasn’t up for it, either. Seoyeon is relentless.” He explained. It was then that you thought about just how much she seemed to want him. A twinge of jealously washed over you, and your expression darkened. Chan noticed immediately. “Are you alright?” He asked. You nodded.
“Yeah. I’m just worried.” You said. Chan walked around the back counter and closer to you, placing his hands on your shoulders.
“You don’t need to worry, love. She is the last person I want to be anywhere near.” His hands lightly rubbed up and down your arms. You felt the heat from his fingertips sinking deep into your skin. It felt like fire.
“I know.” You laughed. “I’m dumb. Sorry.” Chan smiled and leaned in, pulling you into a hug. You slowly wrapped your arms around his torso, taking in his scent. Not long after, you heard someone clearing their throat from the back of the café. It was Mrs. Park.
“You two seem well acquainted.” She said, smiling.
The three of you laughed as you pulled away from Chan’s embrace, his hands lingering on yours. You looked away.
“Coffee?” He asked. You looked up at him and nodded.
“Coffee.” You said.
~
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