John can't remember everything anyone has ever said in his presence, but he does keep a mental list of his favourites. A list that he runs over whenever he can't sleep at night.
Nikolai's is from the very beginning of their relationship, and John still laughs whenever it crosses his mind. Which often makes him look like a headcase in public.
"I do not understand men who shave their tits; they need insulation for survival."
Upon seeing a man pissing against a wall in public, Kate had muttered under her breath, "And they wonder why lesbianism is on the rise." John maintains that he did not choke on the fag in his hand; he merely had a tickle in his throat.
Johnny may be the best for it. The Scotsman seems to suffer from an illness in which he cannot process the words he's about to say; he just spits them at you and hopes for the best.
After hearing a man proclaim that he was the spitting image of his father, John had barely caught the sergeant leaning into Kyle's ear to whisper, "A guess his parents were dain it wae the lights aff, then."
John is used to Simon being very dry and monotone; he doesn't regard it as rude or uncaring. Half of the time, it's just incredibly funny.
Johnny's, "A shouldnae be rattlin oan," is no match for Simon's blunt, "And yet, you'll persist." John does object to them kicking each other under the table like children, however.
Kyle is good at keeping it professional on coms for the most part. Sometimes, it escapes him.
"Fuck me, I'd shoot him in the arse, but it'd fucking ricochet."
Kyle did not help himself when he later insisted on describing the aforementioned arse with every synonym for big that he could possibly think of.
He thinks of it a lot less as years pass. The man is dead, and he doesn't cross John's mind as often as he once had. But he'll never forget the day the mighty Captain MacMillan proclaimed, "Just don't go whorin' it, or ye'll end up wae a hole like a vintage golfbag."
