I've heard the word patriarchy misused and overused, so much so that I don't even know if it's a real thing, or if it ever existed. How bout you?
Patriarchy: (n) 1. a form of social organization in which the father is the supreme authority in the family, clan, or tribe and descent is reckoned in the male line, with the children belonging to the father's clan or tribe.
This form of social organization has existed in many cultures from ancient times, not least of which is ancient Hebrew culture in the Bible. It is not inherently oppressive to women and has certain benefits. I am not actually against it, particularly speaking as a complementarian.
The word is definitely misused and overused and has taken a on new definition by feminists. This is why we also see this definition on dictionary.com.
3. a social system in which power is held by men, through cultural norms and customs that favor men and withhold opportunity from women
I don’t think this sort of “patriarchy” exists today. I don’t think it’s existed for a long time. I don’t like the implied conflation with the first definition of patriarchy, either. Yes, this sort of social system once existed, but people who are seeking to prove its existence today must resort to calling out trivialities that have no real impact on women’s lives. Or in some cases, even complain about things that actually benefit women, by skewing the perspective to make it seem negative!
The way that “patriarchy” is talked about today, it’s almost a conspiracy theory. It sounds like some rich old white men are sitting in a conference room somewhere conspiring to oppress women, and to subliminally control their feelings and actions. This does not really take into account the actual motivations of individual men who may or may not be sexist.
And I know this sounds weird coming from me, but I actually wish we would bring the word “sexist” back. It would be better than “misogynist”, because we have all but forgot what that means, and "sexist” implies prejudice rather than hate, which is more accurate to the way most people think about things. And it’s conveniently gender-non-specific.
In fact, most men are not going around conspiring about how to to put women down, even if they harbor some sexist prejudices. Even sexist douchebags are just self-absorbed and thinking about themselves, and how they can get laid. That’s how people are because of sin. Women can be like that too. There’s no conspiracy.
Even advertisements only conspire to get your money. Advertisements play on people’s insecurities, and have always always done so. Companies who try to sell you things are not the patriarchy. Resisting and ignoring the manipulation of advertisements is not social rebellion, it is called being a functional adult with critical thinking skills.
The “patriarchy” as described by feminism is a phantom oppressor that can never be defeated because it exists only in their minds to justify more and more radical extremism. These ideas come straight down from academia, which have a definite social agenda. It’s easy to feel “woke” by learning about the patriarchy, but at some point you have to come back down to earth and ask yourself how much you have actually been personally affected by so-called crimes of the patriarchy. How much of it is provable, how much of it can be avoided just by not valuing others’ opinions too much, and how much of it is just individuals being assholes?
And anybody can be an asshole, man or woman.
