[AND DINNER... WE CALL THAT PLAYING WITH OUR FOOD IN CALI. IN SAN ANTONIO... PFANNEKUCHEN IN THE WINDOW. ...BOREDOM WAS AS EXHAUSTING AS BACKBREAKING LABOR ITS PANCAKES... THIS IS RIDICULOUS. AND TAKING CORNED BEEF HASH...]
Content Warnings: Disassociation (detailed), Negative Self Talk (brief), Non Consensual Kissing (detailed), Non Consensual Touching (detailed), Past Rape/Non-Con (mentioned)
@whumptober-archive
Also posted on ao3 here.
Buck hated these days. The days were it was his job to stay behind and clean everything. While it didn’t happen that often anymore, now that him and the rest of the 118 had mostly put the lawsuit behind them.
Still, he hated the crushing loneliness that threatened to overtake him when he was left alone. The fear that when they left, they would leave him behind for good this time. Sighing, Buck decided he should probably shake himself out of his thoughts and decided he might as well take out the trash to the dumpsters out back.
He had just finished putting the bag into the dumpster when he sensed someone standing behind him. Turning around he said, “Hello. Can I help-” before cutting himself off, realizing who it was.
“Hello Buck.” The words were cheerful but the tone was dark and menacing. It made him nervous.
“Dr. Wells?”
“Not anymore. You lost me my job and my license.” Buck was staring to feel slight panic. The woman in front of him was angry, and she was angry at him.
“That wasn’t my fault.” She inched closer to him until Buck was backed against the wall, fear flashing in his eyes. He suddenly remembered the exact feelings he had last time they interacted, not the fake ones he convinced himself he felt, but the raw terror and powerlessness he felt.
“Stop playing around Buck. You were a sex addict. You still are. You brought up being Facebook friends. You had sex with me. Not the other way around. Of course I lost my job because of you. It’s all your fault. Everything is always your fault Buck .”
With each added word, Buck felt himself sinking lower and lower to the ground, attempting to push as far back into the wall as was physically possible.
“Just remember. You caused every bad thing that ever happened to you.” She caressed his face with her hand, her long nails scratching his face as he whimpered beneath her.
“Please don’t.” They words were lacking the power he wished they had, the power that he felt being taken from him as she moved closer and closer to him.
She leaned down to kiss him and he whimpered again, praying to anything and anyone that would hear him to make it stop. Idly, he wondered if the 118 was back yet and if anyone even noticed he was gone if they were.
All he felt was the searing heat of the kiss, a burning that felt more akin to hot coals in his mouth, rather than the firework feeling people usually talked about. He felt violated and there was nothing he could do to stop it.
He should be able to stop it. Why wasn’t he stopping it? Maybe she was right. Maybe he was still a sex addict. Maybe he was Buck 1.0 all over again. Maybe he was never not the reckless kid who lived for sex. Maybe that was all he was.
He lost track of the time that passed as she continued kissing him and running her hands all over him. He felt oddly detached from his body and hardly felt the wet tears on his face anymore or the constant whimpering sound he was making.
He vaguely registered the sound of footsteps approaching as he felt her pulling away. He heard voices overlapping as he continued to stare off at a specific point off in the distance.
“Get away from him.”
“Bobby call Athena, she might be able to help.”
Time must have passed because suddenly there was a person kneeling beside him and Buck flinched away.
“Hey, it’s alright Buck. It’s just me. It’s Eddie. I’m not going to hurt you.”
“...Eddie?” Buck’s voice sounded hoarse and raspy even to his own ears and it made him want to flinch away again.
“Do you think you can get up and walk with me Buck?” He shook his head. “Can I touch you so I can guide you inside?” He hesitantly nodded, mentally bracing himself for Eddie’s touch.
Buck watched, detached, as he was led to the couch, Eddie’s arms firmly on his so he didn’t collapse like he so desperately wanted to. Hen and Chimney came up the stairwell shortly after, updating them on what had happened.
“Bobby just called Athena, she’s on the way.”
“Why did you do that?” Buck asked, speaking the first full, coherent sentence since they had found him in the alleyway.
“I figured she could help with the legal side of things in case you want to press charges.” Bobby said as he climbed up the stairway to the lounge area where Buck was currently latching onto Eddie for dear life.
When Athena arrived, she helpfully laid it all out for him, without getting too caught up in emotion. “Unfortunately, because it was just non consensual kissing and touching, we cannot take her to court. However, what we can do is file a restraining order that will keep her from getting near you.”
Buck nodded, “Yeah… yeah that sounds good. I want to do that.” They got to work on the paper work while Bobby was cooking dinner and the rest of the 118 was lounging around, providing comfort to Buck in the fact that they were there and they weren’t leaving him this time.
