#crackau

[ask-tubbo-bee]

Panicking about the mosquito in our bedroom now.

TOMMY PLEASE COME HOME HOW DID A MOSQUITO LIVE THROUGH SNOWCHESTER

[madremnant]

Every form of liquid Kadaj comes into contact with turns black, which makes things very difficult for him. 

[this-cat-writes]

OVERWATCH AU TIME

So time for a crack AU folks! What about, now hear me out, a Supermodel AU!

Back in the days when Omnic’s were coming onto the scene and the world was confused as to what truly made one human and beautiful came a new modeling and talent agency with one mission: unite the world in all it’s beautiful differences. Overwatch! In order to show that all people could be beautiful and powerful they assembled a small but diverse cast of people from all over the world, showing that no matter what you could be beautiful. As time went on they continued to gather a more diverse group, and in many ways succeeded with their goal.

Unfortunately things changed and one star emerged above them all: Jack Morrison. The standard for beauty by many people and by far the most charismatic of the bunch he stole the show and pulled the spotlight off his best friend, causing internal strife among the group. A rival talent agency known only as Talon saw this opportunity and seized it, knowing that they could not allow this upstart to gain any more fame. One tragic accident and several horrible public scandals later Overwatch was disbanded, all the new talent scattering to the wind, some never to be seen again. Years later though one particular model and hopeful star had had enough, he had lived his life in seclusion, never following his dream of stardom, because he felt he just couldn’t without Overwatch. Yet as he stared at the contacts list that held the names and numbers of so many of his old friends and coworkers he couldn’t let it go: Winston had to try. So he called up his oldest friend, Lena, the same girl who he had once convinced to join the agency with him. Beautiful and spunky, and the victim of a rather odd plane incident, she had been just as eager as he was to join the amazing new agency, and just as crushed when it was closed down.

As they spoke it became clear that these two fangirls (gorillas?) would not be kept down! If Overwatch wouldn’t pull itself back together, then they would do it! So out went the call, to all the former models, actors, singers, dancer, and more, calling them back to their true passion!

[agent-amare]

“Wait, wait, so...there’s a place called Starling City..and you.. do cool hacker stuff for a superhero?” The Brit laughed, smiling at the woman who looked well.. exactly like her. “I do hacking stuff in New York for superheroes..and well.. a whole organization that..sorta works with superheroes.” Elle smiled. “Absolutely bloody fascinating.” 

im-a-hawker

[kislap]

in every since fandom i've been in, i always make an au where they're in a store/mall and the biggest one was with homestuck where i put all the trolls, betas and alphas in a medium-sized market and shenanigans ensued. it centered around karkat, with him narrating his everyday life and tbh it was just my excuse as a way to say cuss words a lot. there used to be a blog about it but i got tired making all of the art for it so i just trashed the entire thing. it had everything and coincided with the canon, which was super hard, considering most of them were dead... but i did manage to kill off 2-3 of the trolls. it was fantastic, too bad i deleted it and scrapped everything. but now since i'm into dmmd, i made another au with the same format. now its in another store. the dmmd boys are in geek squad. it doesn't really have a big story yet but all i know is that it centers around aoba and how he's supposed to help around best buy, teaching non-tech savvy people how to fix and care for their allmates. i havent gotten around the shippings but this entire au seriously just circles around fucking best buy and geek squad that theres no point doing shippy shit. i just think they'll be hilarious.

[kislap]

dmmd au where the entire plot is the same except they change clothes everyday and when aoba and [insert boyfriend here] enter platinum jail wearing "spy-like" matching outfits

[kislap]

i want a mile high au that looks like britney spears’s toxic or not and i’m pretty its highly unrealistic for aoba or noiz to be a spy… so i’m sticking with old school (this is gonna be shitty, hold onto your hats)

anyway, as ari said, noiz totally has this big elaborate plan on getting laid in every single country (nonetheless the plane) so every summer, a month before going to visit midorijima, noiz takes aoba on an outlandish trip where they go visit historical sites and learn which, to aoba’s dismay is a fucking terrible idea because its summer?? but noiz is the one who suggested, planned and picked their destination so any argument is a losing battle. what can you do, noiz /thrives/ off of information and he honestly cannot miss a chance on seeing something in person rather than on the internet… but seriously, they went to France and visited castles instead of swimming somewhere in the French Riviera … wtf noiz

but even before that, noiz gets his fun throughout the entire trip. he could say he’s mastered arousing aoba in embarrassing situations but who’s to say whats normal these days? noiz books the flights and picks their seats and he chooses the ones borderlining the economy seats, because they have a small but convenient curtain behind them to separate the business class from the economy class. also he knows that aoba has a thing for privacy, even if it helps with only a little. when they’re seated down noiz likes to talk to him and give out terrible innuendos about how he’s going to fuck him in the bathroom and during the first time aoba heard it he pinched noiz’s nose and didn’t talk to him until they were asked about customs.

theres also moments where aoba complies, but he still wants noiz to suffer so he makes him do all the work for the both of them. noiz would lean aoba’s chair in a reclining position and kiss him deeply, but in order to do that he has to take of his seatbelt and lean further across te armrest.

[kislap]

i want virus to be really obsessed with the great gatsby and he quotes it a lot when he has the opportunity but aoba hasnt read it so he thinks that he's just repeating himself while trip makes faces and pretends that he's in the office