#dancing rants

[dancing-heart-pony]

I’m upset about not finishing my fics

I really want other people to see them, to know the AUs and to think about them like I do other peoples’ stories. But I haven’t been writing. I haven’t written anything in like 2 years. None of them are finished.

Some of them, like Bro Average & Cool Patrol, actually have a LOT of stuff already written. They are already half a story, missing a few translational scenes, but they actually have substance.

Others, like the dreaded Supernatural AU (which I ALREADY wrote a bunch for and then scrapped because it was GARBAGE), Space Alien AU, or Medieval AU are mostly just a collection of ideas and exchanges that have no chronology and I have no real proof of it being anything more than my brainchild.

Some are so bare bones. Not even a fully thought-out plan. I have a lot that are just fucking… bullet points of events, ramblings about what the characters should be doing/thinking at certain moments, paragraphs of dialogue that sound good, but with no exposition whatsoever.

Hospital AU is just pure concept. Writing for it was never really in the cards, even though I do have a general vibe about it.

I would say I don’t care, and post what I’ve got of some of these, but it doesn’t feel right. Zombie AU never got an ending because idk HOW to end it. For those who don’t know, I usually finish my stories before posting them anywhere. I would never be able to do scheduled updates, because I can only write well when I get a massive surge of inspiration. I don’t want to post unfinished stories, because I’d feel guilty about leaving them hanging.

My writing process is such a mess. I’m sad about it. 😞

[dancing-heart-pony]

I woke up at 3am and my first thought was, “would it be feasibly possible to transplant someone’s head/brain to a different body?” Assuming that you could, (and someone else had willingly donated their own living body... eh...) it would probably be a very tedious process and end in severe nervous system damage... 🤔

[dancing-heart-pony]

Since the panel happened, D&D with Jack, Mark, Bob, and Wade is all that I want.

Jack told me that hopefully it’ll happen, but that doesn’t guarantee it by any means, and it’s what I want more than anything else at the moment.

Or just more squad collabs in general, I guess.

But also, I just want them to make up D&D characters so I can draw them.

[dancing-heart-pony]

I’m a big dummy dumb cuz I didn’t talk to Robin. He was right there and I got so distracted that I forgot :(

Also, last year when I decided to go to PAX East for the first time, that was the year that Tyler stopped going.

I don’t think I’m going to be able to go to anymore conventions, (because of money, stress, and lack of people who want to go with me) so I guess I’ll never get to meet either of them :/

[dancing-heart-pony]

WAIT. WAIT. DOES A/B/O INHERITANCE HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH BLOOD TYPE?!? BECAUSE A, B, AND O ARE ALL BLOOD TYPES!

WHAT IF ALPHAS HAD TYPE A BLOOD AND BETAS HAD TYPE B BLOOD AND OMEGAS HAD TYPE O!? AND AB IS LIKE 50/50 ALPHA OR BETA BUT YOU DON’T KNOW UNTIL A CERTAIN POINT.

THIS COULD BE A LOGICAL EXPLANATION FOR WHY O/O AND B/O PAIRS CAN NEVER PRODUCE ALPHA OFFSPRING.

[dancing-heart-pony]

It’s like 3am, but I need to vent.

I had a dream yesterday night that I was going to clean my entire house, get rid of all the things I don’t need, and that I was going to move.

I’ve never wanted to move before. It’s never even seriously crossed my mind, until that dream. I was thinking about it a lot today and I’m thinking about it a lot right now.

There are so many things wrong with the house we live in right now, that I don’t think anyone is ever going to bother to fix. The heat and air haven’t worked in 7(?) years. Our bathtub has never been big enough to actually bathe in. The spare bedroom is like a dumping spot for all the clothes and furniture that we don’t have anything to do with. Our basement has been unfinished cement walls and floors for all 12(?) years we’ve lived here. Everything is so unorganized and we just have random boxes and sacks of papers and old clothes and dumb shit that we don’t need. We need to clean, but even if we cleaned the whole house, and got rid of a majority of that junk, I still think it would feel gross. The wallpaper is ugly and nothing matches. I feel like this house is trapped in the 90’s or something and I need to move on. Everything feels too small and too worn. It just makes me depressed.

I feel like we need a fresh start, and I don’t want to live in this house anymore.

I want to move.

[dancing-heart-pony]

In the final episode of Doki Doki, I thought for split second that Jack was wearing one of Mark's Christmas sweaters, but no. It was Thor.

No. Buying Mark's merch... That's not a thing he does anymore...

[dancing-heart-pony]

I’m a little mad okay

Mark, you created The Screaming Room (with no person limit) and opened the link back up at the same time.

Obviously that was going to oversaturate the server with new people who don’t know/care about the rules and add a bunch of spammers.

You admit that you did it too be funny and see if you could break it, which you did.

I’ve made friends on that server. It’s probably the most human contact I’ve had in a long time. I don’t want to lose contact with those people because you don’t care enough to talk to the discord people or get rid of The Screaming Room (which is causing the outages)

I just... ugh.