The Year Behind Us: Small Moments More Memorable than Sex & Money
It’s a new year and lots of happy memories lay ahead! To find out what makes for the best future memories, we asked our users what they remember most fondly about their relationship from the past year.
Even if women and men don’t always agree on how they met, they are strikingly similar when it comes to their happiest memories together. (Each person could tell us more than one memory, so answers total more than 100% of users.)
Overall, two answers were the most common:
Shared New Experiences (23% of women, 22% of men)
From local day trips to trips abroad, new experiences made for cherished memories. While the vast majority (87%) were out-of-town vacations (Paris, anyone?), you didn’t have to go far. Spending a night outdoors watching shooting stars also counted. Still, make sure your GPS and passport are up-to-date!
Their Partner’s Ongoing Support (22% of women, 21% of men)
Feeling loved, supported, and part of a rock-solid relationship was very memorable, especially through tough times, such as changing careers, battling cancer, or the inevitable growing older.
For 18% of women and 21% of men, the early days of new (or rekindled) romances were the most memory-worthy. Some fell in love with their partner for the first time, though at least a fifth of folks in this group were re-connecting and falling in love again after years and/or miles apart. For this 41-year old woman, it was the moment she realized she was in love:
Laying in the hammock in your backyard and realizing I loved you. Truly; deeply; madly; passionately; beyond all reason. And that I couldn't stand to be away from you any longer. Strange that the thing I was so afraid of is what finally set me free...
For 12-14% of people, simple moments were the highlights, whether meals or conversations, being silly and laughing together, just cuddling, or even giving him a pedicure. As one 20-year old woman put it:
Definitely the small moments. We did a lot of big and amazing fun things; but the small moments are where the perfection is.
Even the mundane can take on special significance with the right partner, as per this 35-year old man:
Any of our drives. Just driving to the store is exciting with her.
But that doesn’t mean special occasions weren’t noteworthy. Aside from proposals and weddings (best memories for 13%), special occasions like birthdays, anniversaries, and Christmas were in 9% of women’s and 5% of men’s fondest memories. (This was the biggest difference in answers between genders, btw.) Just 6-7% of users mentioned changes in living situation, such as moving in or buying a house.
At the bottom of the list, the least-mentioned memories involved sex or money (only 2-3%), and external milestones outside the relationship, like graduating or getting a new job (1-2%). This is good news: little everyday things we have the most control over contribute more to happy memories than these other "bigger deals."
While gender and relationship status (dating, engaged, domestically partnered or married) made no difference, what was remembered most fondly did change with age.
For women, their partner’s support and commitment grow in importance over time, becoming the most common fond memory for women (35% of them) by the time they’re 41-years old. The next closest answer was new experiences, for 20% of women 41-60. Family time, while not the most popular answer, was most important to women between ages 33-40.
Young men 18-24 years old remember the beginning stages of a relationship most, with 27% citing events like the first time they met their partner, their first date or first kiss as fondest memories (more evidence men are romantic?). Like women, men value a partner’s support and commitment more as they get older, though they remembered new experiences just as often (32% of the time) when 41-years or older.
All of which goes to show there’s much to look forward to in 2013. Now go out and make great memories together! And don’t forget to take theicebreak app with you.
