#dazai asks

[askryuu]

Dont mind sugar, theyre an idiot.

ne~ you look familiar~ have we met before?~

[illegal-spiegel]

Heyy how are you? I saw your post so i decided to try and send you a request. What I'd like to ask is a scenario: port mafia fazani celebrating his birthday with her s/o? Thanks in advance and have a nice day 💜💜💜

↳ AH YES THIS IS BEAUTIFUL. THANK YOU!!! I hope I did okay 👉👈

↳ genre: fluff

↳ warnings: season two spoilers

I'm torn between wanting pm!Dazai to hate/not care about his birthday or to eat up the attention lmao. Let's do a bit of both 🤷‍♀️

okay SO

I definitely feel like if he didn't really care when he first joined the mafia. Like literally no one would know about his birthday

well, that is until Mori off-handedly goes, "Oh. It's your birthday today, isn't it? Happy birthday." Mother fucker knew EXACTLY what he was doing and it pissed Dazai off to no ends

that or Oda is planning him a surprise party (and by party I mean he's literally just inviting you since Dazai does't actually like anyone else lmao) (maybe Chuuya? Idk depends on when this is set lol)

now, if you two are already dating, then of fucking course he wants to celebrate with you

since he's close to you and actually cares about you, he'll let you see his softer, goofier side

the first year you're together, he probably wouldn't want you to plan anything for him

HE would take YOU to the arcade, the park for ice cream, the river bank, the city skyline, literally where ever he wanted to go when the mood struck him

I'll keep this sfw but just know things would get spicy at the end of the day

the second year, you don't ask for permission. You're planning the whole day out 😎

he's honestly surprised by the effort you put into the planning and is touched you care so much about him

at one point, probably the end of the day, he'll just hold you in his arms against his chest while whispering, "Thanks for staying by my side."

he then gives you the most passionate kiss of your life

once Oda is gone, he doesn't want to celebrate his birthday that year

you give him a cupcake and wish him a happy birthday nonetheless

once he joins the ADA though, things get much better and he starts to open up more

literally gobbles up all the attention everyone gives him for his birthday

"Where's my present, Kida?" he'll ask Kunikida with puppy dog eyes. Kida will then turn pink from embarrassment and start stuttering out that "he left it at home" or "it's on its way; it just hasn't arrived yet"

no matter where he is or what he's doing, he always spends at least half the day with just you

you've been there for so many birthdays, so many phases of his life, and he can't wait for the rest of the birthdays to come <3

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[chuuyaaf]

Oooohhh 4 ,9, 29, 34, 35 for Dazai please. I'm thirsty for him :3

LETS ALL BE THIRSTY FOR DAZAI

While @goddamnitdazai​ and @bungou-stray-dogs-indulgences​ fight over Chuuya’s weiner, we can all share Dazai ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

~Admin Kat

Dazai:

4. Kissed anyone?

“Plenty...Why, are you interested~?”

He actually hasn’t, although he does trick girls into thinking he wants to kiss them because he’s an ass. He’s definitely kissed people before, but definitely not as many as he likes to pretend he has. Again, because he’s an ass. (Also because he rarely ever lets anyone close enough to him so any short of emotional and/or physical intimacy is very limited BUT SHH I DIDN’T SAY THAT)

“But you love me~”

Irrelevant.

9. What’s your dream job?

“Investigating the best methods for suicide~ I’d love to write a book just like the Complete Guide to Suicide~!”

29. Worst mistake?

“...Letting Odasaku go confront Mimic. I should have stopped him. I knew he was going...Knowing that I would have defected the Port Mafia anyway...I should have just stopped him.” 

One of the rare moments where Dazai’s sincere and I’m already bawling my eyes out.

34. Any talents?

“Being the most reliable and trusted member of the Agency~!”

Being an asshole.

“Oh! I was also a torture expert back when I was in the mafia if you’re interested~”

35. Do you wish you could ever start over?

“...There’s really no point. What could I change? What could I make different? All I’d be doing is reliving my past.” 

Are you okay, you’re being awfully depressing this round :(

[askryuu]

ah- Dazai-kun is here?

please don’t tell me thats who it sounds like.

[askryuu]

dazai, akutagawa, how does it feel knowing that there isn't anything atsushi wouldnt do to save u guys - including bending/altering reality

[askryuu]

dazai, u make fun of chuuya for being the shorter one in ur partnership; but if u look at ur current partner, kunikida, /you're/ the shorter one. does that mean kunikida gets to call /you/ "chibi"

i tease chibikko because he’s so short! i’m barely shorter than kunikida-kun, Chūya is at least a full head shorter than me with his ugly hat!

[askryuu]

hey Dazai!

@flawless-oda

Care to explain to Odasaku why you caused that car crash?

why should i have to.

[askryuu]

Well now!~ that rat surely isnt staying dead is he?

and i would prefer it if we all didn’t mention that expression of mine to him yes?

and, if you see him bleeding out? don’t touch the blood.