Looking for a partner (satire btw)
If any fellow Byler wants to marry me here are my needs in a partner
You can't be straight. You have to be like bi or lesbian or something else so we can be discriminated against together.
You have freckles
Your hair has to be brown, orange, dirty blonde or coloured
You have to like the Smiths, the Cure, Cyndi Lauper, The Beatles, Calpurnia, Billie Eilish, Sabrina Carpenter, Kendrick Lamar, Djo, Tame Impala and Weezer
You have to be a die hard Finn Wolfhard fan
You have to like IT
You have to like Stranger Things, but you aren't allowed to like the lost sisters episode or the finale and your favourite episode of season one has to be the flea and the acrobat
You have to have the song head over heels by tears for fears in your top ten
You have to like fanfic
You have to ship Henderhop, Byler, Lumax (mucas), Reddie, Jopper, Stonathan, Boreo, Quarjake and Chorchie. (I know the last two are niece I just love weird ships.)
You have to be a big Canada (yes the country) fan
You can't like sports (besides Tetris)
You have to be able to admit that Tetris is a sport
You have to be willing to read my fanfic
You have to be not racist, sexist or homophobic
You have to be funny
You have to hate Trump
You have to be a femanist but not allowed to be TOO soft
You have to be on the same page politically as me
You have to have a touch of the 'tism
You have to have watched degrassi
You have to be nice
You have to make me cheesecake
You have to kiss me everyday
You have to have watched all my favourite movies
you have to be able to understand my fast talking and sometimes unetaligable accent (it's british and australian somehow and i can't pronounce some words)
You have to be ready for massive text from me
I don't think I'm THAT picky? I actually am shocked how single I am :(
