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from Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation

#these aren't exactly Revelational and are things most pwDID know #but as someone earlier in their recovery it helped a lot to see this all put into writing #dissociative identity disorder #actuallydid #actuallydissociative #actually did #recovery #did recovery #didrecovery #osddid #osdd #ddnos #info #otherwise specified dissociative disorder #coping book #didnextsteps #didns #did next steps

Today was a high-symptom day. It was a little scary how dissociated/disoriented I was and how reduced functioning was. I noticed that I was naturally inclined to eat more spicy food (= more sensory input) and I used lists to get me going, but I just seriously couldn't think. I randomly started crying around 10 times as well, without knowing what was going on or why I was crying.

Long story short, I think it was influence from a part. Things started getting better when I decided to narrate everything. It was scary to look in the mirror (and see an unfamiliar face), so I avoided that, but I did count out how old I am. And told about current life in very simple terms. I invited the part to be present while we did the washing up ("it's like playing in a tub, see?"). Then I went for a walk and "showed" where we live.

I already felt a bit better at that point, but still experienced very high anxiety and limited vision. That's when I remembered that a friend said that sometimes it helps to explicitly invite a part to look out of the body's eyes. I did that and said: "See, this is where we are now. It is safe." and THAT is when I felt a big shift to calmness inside.

#DIDnextsteps

On one hand, I'd like to open up for questions about introject things because I rarely see people talk about introjects/fictional introjects outside of the content of fandom things/source material. On the other, I don't want to open up to questions because I'm afraid it'll all be about fandom things/source material. Maybe that will be mitigated by me not saying what I am introjected from?

I suppose if I just say I'm open to questions (from the perspective of an introject from a fictional source who has no/very little desire to associate with said source) I can always delete/not answer questions I don't want to answer. So.

If there's anything folks want to ask, they can. I might not answer if your question makes me uncomfortable or I think it's too prying.

#actuallydid #dissociative identity disorder #didnextsteps #?#because i feel disconnecting from source material is a 'next step' for introjected parts #-T